"After receiving a laptop for Christmas, Tate wrote in a widely shared essay in the Washington Post last week, the fourth-grader quickly marched up to her mom and wondered, 'Why are all of these pictures of me on the Internet?' She asked if all the essays and photographs she had found by Googling could be taken down. 'I told her that was not possible,' Tate wrote. And furthermore, 'I’m not done exploring my motherhood in my writing.'... In her essay-length defense of her decision to keep writing about parenting—that is, about her daughter’s life—Tate attempts to give this kind of callousness a feminist gloss. She writes that her 'creative labor' as a mother is 'culturally devalued' and argues that 'promising not to write about her anymore would mean shutting down a vital part of myself,' which wouldn’t be good for her or her daughter.... [S]he compares not-blogging to a form of abuse: 'Amputating parts of my experience feels as abusive to our relationship as writing about her without any consideration for her feelings and privacy.'"
From "That Outrageous Mommy Blogger Who Refuses to Stop Writing About Her Kid Highlights a Key Parent-Child Generational Gap" (Slate).
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Talk to the hand, mommy.
It seems this is related to the challenge of abortion: How do you balance the interests of the mother and the child?
"attempts to give this kind of callousness a feminist gloss"
Hey, the kid should be grateful she wasn't aborted--another kind of callousness that tends to get a feminist gloss.
She can write about her experience. It's called a diary and is private. No amputation necessary.
The daughter should sue.
The modern day stage/pageant mother, except now it's all about mommy being the star of the show?
Seems like textbook narcissism to me. She may not even be capable of true empathy toward her daughter, only mimicking it. Hopefully people won't reward her deranged behavior with views, but that still might not stop her from blogging.
The intransigence of Christie Tate towards her daughters wishes is because of the fame and money. And no other reasons.
It is exactly like abortion, Ron. No child should ever have a mommy whose self-actualization has been compromised. Think of the children!
She should be able to write online without using her daughter's real name.
Genuine altruistic generosity toward a dauoghter by a mother is rare. I forgot who said that.
Anyway, toujours la competition!
Every time I hear stories like this I'm constantly reminded of what the street artist Banksy said several years ago,
"If the 20th century was about getting your 15 minutes of fame, the 21st is going to be about getting your 15 minutes of anonymity."
I feel really truly sorry for these kids. Not only do some of them submit themselves to this lifestyle curation, but some have parents that do it for them.
We are days away from progressives demanding moms get their children's consent before Instragramming their photos. And I might be sympathetic after seeing the disregard this woman has for her own child's feelings about living such an exposed life AND NO WAY TO DELETE IT.
My parent would have loved doing this. In fact, she did,in a way, typing out long both-sides-typed "letters," showing herself in the best light, of course. And leaving them about the house, so I could see how Mommy was suffering, since she dumped my father.
After the first few "posts" I stopped reading them.
*puking sounds*
Good grief. This woman embodies everything that is wrong with Liberalism/feminism.
Get a clue lady. Your child's life is NOT yours to exploit as you see fit.
And for what? Validation from strangers commenting on your blog?
Pathetic.
Back to the Depression, part LIXIII. People renting out rooms to strangers nightly, becoming gypsy cabdrivers, putting even their smallest kids to work on the family (server) farm. But as long as its done with an app, its modern and cool! Empowering, even.
A bit "me-centric"
Okay, a lot "me-centric"
Obviously the daughter needs her own blog.
If this child wanted to go on puberty blocking drugs and get in the queue to have her genitals irreparably surgically mutilated to simulate a man's, then the left would say that it was criminally abusive not to do what she wanted - literally criminally abusive, you could go to actual physical jail for not allowing it.
If this child wanted to start birth control and get an abortion when that birth control failed, you would be socially reamed for questioning this decision, and in fact as a parent probably wouldn't even be told about it, because that would be a HIPAA violation.
But when she requests her info to be taken down from the internet, that's just silly child stuff. You can poo-poo that at will.
Big Mike said...
The daughter should sue.
The daughter should blog. I bet there are a few things mommy does that mommy would not like the whole world to know about.
Good for the daughter. Your life shouldn’t be your Mother’s Little Helper.
She'd be mad at her mother about something else anyway. It's that age.
I'm not a child anymore.
deadpool: "Look! I'm a teenage girl! I'd rather be anywhere than here. I'm all about long, sullen silences, followed by mean comments, followed by more silences. So what's it gonna be, huh? Long sullen silence, or mean comment? Go on.
negasonic: You've got me in a box here.
If you are not capable of writing about anything but yourself and those around you, you're not really a "writer," you're someone who keeps a diary and insists others read it.
'The father could not be reached for comment.'
"Of course mommy loves you. Just not as much as mommy loves herself."
She writes that her 'creative labor' as a mother is 'culturally devalued'
I can only guess that the father is an anonymous sperm donor.
I agree with Althouse. The girl now has sufficient determination to decide if she wants to be part of a Nationwide Conversation and she has clearly stated she doesn't want to be.
Many writers have written about their children, but generally they seem to wait till after they are adults, and frequently ask their kids if they mind inclusion.
That this is a narcissistic Feminist, who only cares about her own desires doesn't surprise me a bit. It seems the main key of Feminism is to destroy empathy in women, and it seems to extend to children as well.
I mean, how many Feminists have we seen who have been vile to their kids online and publicly and excuse it as service to their ideology?
These are the type of women who would watch the murder of their own kids for a 'righteous cause'.
I had a wonderful mother. Her name was Sarah. I haven't dreamed about her since she died ten years ago. But I did, just now. She was in my house fussing around, and when she saw me, she picked me up over her head and looked into my eyes with adoration. I'm a child of divorce. Does this woman have a man in the house? No? Oh well.
If I may, this video feels somewhat appropriate for this thread. I found, in my dad's things, all the letters I ever wrote to him. I did one video, and now I'm going to do another. Very personal, but perhaps you can relate, if you are a child of divorce. Letter From Matthew to his Father, 1982/
I look forward to reading her daughter's side of things posted in r/raisedbynarcissists in a few years.
"it's about having choices, Honey...MINE !!"
Kevin said... If this child wanted to go on puberty blocking drugs.....
What Kevin said! (apparently,) we should Always listen to our children, sometimes
Happily, the first three pages are almost uniformly critical of the mother.
"After receiving a laptop for Christmas, Tate wrote in a widely shared essay in the Washington Post last week, the fourth-grader quickly marched up to her mom and wondered, 'Why are all of these pictures of me on the Internet?'
This was somewhat interesting until I figured out that the widely shared ("essay-length"?) Washington Post essay wasn't written by a 4th-grader named Tate who received a laptop for Christmas.
Mommy Deareset.....
If Slate thinks you're a mess,.
I suspect she's going to have a lot to write about in her kids teen years.
"To my great shame, I have realized my child is a Republican."
Despite Mom's years of blogging, she seems to have missed a fundamental lesson of parenthood. "Once you give birth, it's not about you anymore."
The mother could do all those things privately if she were being truthful in her explanations. The fulfillment she is seeking comes not from the act of writing about her life, but from the displaying of it to others. I feel the same way about Facebook shit- people put up all these photos and personal stories about themselves, their children, their friends, and their other relatives, but then have basically hundreds or even thousands of people approved to see it all. It is narcissism run rampant.
I feel sorry for the daughter that her mother has so little regard for her (apparently she’s done the same thing to people who were in her therapy group). She may not have much choice about having her mother in her life while she’s still a minor but hopefully when she’s an adult and should she someday have children of her own, she’ll keep them away from their grandmother.
Just the term "mommy blogger" now appeals to me about as much as a cat litter.
The dark side of socialization.
aborted--another kind of callousness that tends to get a feminist gloss
Welcome to the world, baby. You're not wanted. Off with her head!
That said, you're living for two now, reconcile.
Coincidentally, James Lileks has been writing about his daughter for years. Unlike the mother, he was very circumspect. Until she was an adult, he rarely posted pictures (in fact, I can't remember he ever did).
He also did not write about her so much as his reaction to her. He mentioned that he frequently took videos of her, but never for public consumption. She would get them when she grew up and she could decide what to do with them.
Now she's graduated from high school and exploring the world, and he shares more about her with us, but I'm assuming only with her permission. And he never even hinted about any disreputable behavior from her. In short, nothing that would embarrass her.
(As a side note, the mommy blogger is lying. It is possible to delete stuff from the internet. You can even notify Google and they'll purge the cache from your website. Easy peasy.)
Mommy should remember — your kids choose your nursing home.
In a decent society, somebody would slap this child abusing cunt upside the head and make her act right. Instead, she will continue to exploit her daughter for another few years until she is able to flee this narcissitic twunt.
What an awful mother.
"But honey, you are Mommy's product."
Coincidentally, James Lileks has been writing about his daughter for years. Unlike the mother, he was very circumspect. Until she was an adult, he rarely posted pictures (in fact, I can't remember he ever did).
Exactly. Lileks was the first person I thought about when reading this.
I remember when Gnat was born and now she's in Brazil. And the only thing we know about his wife is she's a lawyer and likes to play tennis. Never seen a picture of her.
He's one of the best out there. This 'mom' could take a lesson from him.
Just take away the little brat's computer.
Yeah, like I've always wondered what Madonna's kids thought when they discovered Google.
And I bet from what we read here that here writings about her kid are...disturbing.
I feel sorry for her daughter, having a mother who cares so little for her.
Poor woman she cas constrained even from exercising her penumbrous right.
"Because your mom is a narcissist."
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