Althouse: “Isn’t it a new world between men and women now? We’ve got to really, really be vigilant. Ever vigilant. I put my arm around my wife the other day..."

June 29, 2018

“Isn’t it a new world between men and women now? We’ve got to really, really be vigilant. Ever vigilant. I put my arm around my wife the other day..."

"... and literally my arm, like it was an electric charge... I put my arm around my wife’s waist and then went, ‘Oh, I’m sorry! Was that inappropriate?'"

That's Alec Baldwin talking to Jerry Seinfeld in an upcoming episode of "Comedians in Cars Getting Coffee."

Has the #MeToo movement affected you too? Have you been wondering, Oh my God, have I been raping my wife all these years?

Here's a teaser for Jerry's new season. It doesn't have the Alec Baldwin line it it. I'm just adding it here because I enjoyed it...

... there now, back to the question legitimately (if hilariously) raised by Alec Baldwin: Do you need to reexamine what you've been doing to your wife all these years... and what she's been doing to you? And for women readers: Has #MeToo caused you to wonder if you should enforce stronger boundaries? Or is it just fine that you've given yourself fully to each other and that there's a floating, ongoing "yes" that applies until there's an actual, verbalized "no"?

95 comments:

Henry said...: The past will be revisited. In therapy or court.; 6/29/18, 9:03 AM
Unknown said...: Do these new rules go both ways? What about the old rules? You know, the rules Mike Pence follows. All of the men being revealed as abusers weren't following the old rules?; 6/29/18, 9:03 AM
Shouting Thomas said...: Zero effect.

I rejected feminism 30 years ago as patent nonsense.

U.S. women are the most privileged, richest, most politically powerful and safest group of people in human history.

The grievance is laughable.

Feminist women in Woodstock tried to organize a #meToo campaign against me for my online comments and well known public opinions. I told them to go fuck themselves. Oddly, this works. It’s the Trump factor. They realized they couldn’t intimidate me and they went away.; 6/29/18, 9:04 AM
Bill Peschel said...: Nope. No effect. But that's because my wife and I talk, and by that, I actually do ask before going further, if there's any sign that she's not interested.

But also, there's space in between "absolutely no" and "absolutely yes" that's called "mmmmm, I might be talked into it."

That, and not abusing women in the office, too. I would have thought that was obvious, but it's clearly not in Hollywood.; 6/29/18, 9:06 AM
Will Cate said...: Ditto what Mr. Peschel says above -- No effect. 34 yrs. of marriage, still great; 6/29/18, 9:07 AM
Shouting Thomas said...: The whole campaign was on behalf of actresses and models.

I worked with these people in the music and video biz.

Almost all actresses and models are also whores. (And I don’t have anything against whores. In fact, I’ve loved a couple of them.) So, they’re playing it both ways.

Acting and modeling are exceptionally simple and easy skills that any person can quickly learn. The difference between who’s marketable and who isn’t is physical attractiveness, i.e., fuckability. This is true for both males and females.

If you really want to see the casting couch in action, check out what men in the theater and movies go through. If you don’t attend the gay orgies, you might as well go home to Kansas.; 6/29/18, 9:14 AM
My name goes here. said...: " Or is it just fine that you've given yourself fully to each other and that there's a floating, ongoing 'yes' that applies until there's an actual, verbalized 'no'?"

This used to be called marriage.; 6/29/18, 9:14 AM
mockturtle said...: This #MeToo crap is the most absurd way to enable publicity-seeking celebrities since the great 'rehab movement' of a few decades ago. Whether 'victim' or 'predator', it gives you a forum.; 6/29/18, 9:15 AM
Dust Bunny Queen said...: Has #MeToo caused you to wonder if you should enforce stronger boundaries?

No.; 6/29/18, 9:20 AM
Shouting Thomas said...: One of the interesting aspects of the short lived attempt to intimidate and blacklist me in Woodstock was that feminist women who've know me for 45 years began screeching online that I'd abused my daughters and that they must hate me.

I live in an in-law unit with one of my daughters and I retired to help take care of my grandkids.

It's pretty standard feminist form to quickly move to accusations of child sexual and physical abuse in the face of disagreement. It's their standard weapon of intimidation.; 6/29/18, 9:21 AM
Leland said...: I think Alec Baldwin should personally be introspective of how he treats his female family members. I've never verbally abused my daughters and calling them fat pigs. I suspect his wives have received similar abuse.

However, I don't accept that Baldwin's personal moral shortcomings are mine as well, or anyone else's. I reject his desire to project his bad habits as shared by others he has never met. I think those that allow him to project like this are not helping either Alec or his family.; 6/29/18, 9:23 AM
Ignorance is Bliss said...: President Clinton said...

I think the norms have really changed in terms of, what you can do to somebody against their will

I don't take marital advice from Bill Clinton; 6/29/18, 9:25 AM
Fernandinande said...: The punch-line is making money by pretending to take #whateverrrr seriously.; 6/29/18, 9:26 AM
Mike (MJB Wolf) said...: I didn't think Alec Baldwin could be stupider than when he is halfheartedly mimicking Trump, an act he portrays so poorly that one has to wonder if he doesn't secretly admire Trump's pussy-grabbing skills. But this insane musing about his marriage cannot be real. I mean, "like an electric charge" in his arm? Really! This what people say when they are excited to be with someone new, not a reaction one has to (what?) internal regret, over (what?) not considering her feelings all these many years. WTF? This has #FakeNews written all over it. But without the news value so, just #Fake I guess. Which pretty much sums up how I perceive Alec anyway. Fake.

Sad! When he was on a show with real writers (30 Rock) he portrayed a believable and funny character. Now in real life he's an unbelievable and unfunny character. Get Glenn Kessler on this stat!; 6/29/18, 9:27 AM
rhhardin said...: If you don't know what instrospection is, you really need to take a long hard look at yourself.

Armstrong and Getty; 6/29/18, 9:30 AM
I Have Misplaced My Pants said...: Someone I know had a big bandwagon metoo moment a few months ago where she told her sad tale of an awkward drunken date where the guy was too handsy and she had to get an Uber and leave. Boooo hoooo you're such a victim.

Yesterday she posted a proud (and obviously bullshit) "funny" story of getting a free tire at the tire store because she had popped a button in the middle of her shirt and had given the tire guy an inadvertent look at her bra.

Which is it, neurotic ladies? Do you wanna be sexualized or not?

Meanwhile we normals are over here having normal fun sex with our husbands and watching with bemusement.; 6/29/18, 9:32 AM
rhhardin said...: The actual male response to #metoo is bemusement.; 6/29/18, 9:32 AM
MountainMan said...: No effect on our marriage. I have known my wife since we were 13. We got married at 22 and just celebrated our 45th anniversary. We are best friends and our marriage is as strong as ever. We consider ourselves to be "normal", or what used to be considered normal. We watch all this other stuff with bemusement.; 6/29/18, 9:37 AM
Rick said...: Have you been wondering, Oh my God, have I been raping my wife all these years?

How absurd.

Or is it just fine that you've given yourself fully to each other and that there's a floating, ongoing "yes" that applies until there's an actual, verbalized "no"?

Is that the way it works anywhere? One party just moves in and gets started until stopped?

Or is it more accurate to say one party extends an invitation (perhaps verbally but perhaps with a touch or kiss) which is then accepted or not?; 6/29/18, 9:39 AM
Char Char Binks, Esq. said...: I won't take any besmirching with bemusement.; 6/29/18, 9:45 AM
buwaya said...: He's just worried whether she's going to claim this in the inevitable divorce.
May be worth extra $ in the settlement.; 6/29/18, 9:45 AM
Sebastian said...: "Do you need to reexamine what you've been doing to your wife all these years... and what she's been doing to you?"

No.

Except insofar as I reexamine everything, well, nearly everything, all the time.

When I get info about yet another prog pig like Baldwin, I do reexamine my determination to stay far, far away from such characters, and my reexamination strengthens my resolve. Then I turn on the radio and hear this guy introducing the NY Philharmonic and infer that those people have no shame.

But when I encounter manufactured prog outrage and destructive social movements, I know I need to #Resist.; 6/29/18, 9:45 AM
Shouting Thomas said...: Here’s what got the controversy started in Woodstock.

Feminist women started complaining that they were being “harassed” and “groped” at a country and western bar about 15 miles west of town. I’ve played at this bar, and I’ve played at every club and bar in the Woodstock area.

I know these women and I’ve observed them for a long time. They attend music events and dances in Woodstock dressed like whores and they proceed to rub their tits and asses on any man who will allow them near them. If any guy is stupid enough to bite, they recoil in horror, call the police and spend the next week online denouncing the poor bastard who was stupid enough to fall for their tricks.

Even the most leftist men in Woodstock are onto this game and won’t fall for it.

So, the ladies travel out to the redneck country and western bar to try to find new suckers. This bar is frequented by truck drivers, cops and construction workers. And the girls do sometimes succeed in roping a dope.

The source of these women’s fury was that I told them I knew what their game was about.; 6/29/18, 9:53 AM
gspencer said...: As to Seinfeld, it's good that I'm reminded that he's a comedian. I wouldn't know it otherwise.; 6/29/18, 9:54 AM
Mr. Groovington said...: I instinctively find Seinfeld repulsive. His humour, his look, his voice, you name it. I don’t have this reaction to any other celebrity.; 6/29/18, 9:57 AM
CJ said...: I swear #metoo was preordained..like planned. And it was supposed to happen during a Hillary Presidency. And we'd have gotten a ton of new Title IX regulations and laws that would basically make it illegal to be a man.

The Left has just been totally broken. They thought they'd try #metoo and it blew up in their faces. Now there's going to be a backlash against #metoo in everyplace...except the places the Left thought would be exempt from #metoo - Hollywood, news media, and Democrat offices. Now they're the only places that are under attack!

This was a serious miscalculation on the part of the Democrat Media - to push #metoo, I mean.

Seriously - Republicans and white collar business owners got the sexual harassment training and have been living by its draconian rules for the past 30 years. Hollwood, the music industry, and media thought they were exempt and we were just complaining about women gaining power, when we were really complaining that the rules they'd made us live by were draconian! They didn't get it because they didn't have to live by them. Now they do, and guess what? They think they're draconian!; 6/29/18, 9:58 AM
stevew said...: I've been married to the same woman for nearly 38 years and this question has never occurred to me or come up. So, no.

-sw; 6/29/18, 9:58 AM
Ann Althouse said...: "I've been married to the same woman for nearly 38 years and this question has never occurred to me or come up. So, no."

We'll it's occurred to you now. You can't unsee the question.; 6/29/18, 10:03 AM
Shouting Thomas said...: How do you take feministm seriously, and how do you expect me to take you seriously about feminism, Althouse?

Your entire life is a demonstration that the feminist grievance is bullshit.

The proper thing for you to do is to thank God every day for being born in this place and time. Your a sensible person on every subject except for gaydom and feminism. You’re kinda loony there.

I don’t see myself as being a compatriot with men for any reason. I’m an individual. I don’t see you having any common interest with women as a class (Marxism). The vast majority of women I’ve known have zero interest in your level of ambition or living as you do, nor are they interested at all in the drama queen theatrics of feminism.

I frankly find you ridiculous and comic whenever you venture into this territory. The rest of the time, I find you to be a very adept and penetration legal thinker.; 6/29/18, 10:11 AM
exiledonmainstreet, green-eyed devil said...: "Or is it just fine that you've given yourself fully to each other and that there's a floating, ongoing "yes" that applies until there's an actual, verbalized "no"?

Well, yeah.; 6/29/18, 10:13 AM
MadTownGuy said...: Ann Althouse said, hypothetically: "Has the #MeToo movement affected you too? Have you been wondering, Oh my God, have I been raping my wife all these years?"

No, Alex, she's been raping you. Especially since the divorce.; 6/29/18, 10:18 AM
Shouting Thomas said...: Remember?

I asked you who elected you as a representative of women? Nobody in your grand surroundings ever was impolite enough to ask you that very obvious question, were they?

This is why you don’t know you’re a Marxist feminist. Out of politesse and the desire to succeed in office politics, everybody around you is lying and pretending that feminism is something besides the usual toxic, stupid Marxism.

I’ve never had anything to lose there. I was a programmer in the back room and nobody gave a shit about my politics. This was by design.

The same is true with critical race theory. It’s the same old Marxist bullshit.

You and your colleagues were flattering one another that you had new ideas, when you were just jabbering the usual Marxist crap. You and your colleagues did this to advance their careers.; 6/29/18, 10:19 AM
MadTownGuy said...: I typed 'Alec' but autocorrect knows best.; 6/29/18, 10:19 AM
walter said...: Leland said...I reject his desire to project his bad habits as shared by others he has never met.
--
Yeah..this does have the smell of self-inoculation.; 6/29/18, 10:33 AM
RigelDog said...: I yearn to be able to debate proponents of affirmative consent. Of course they never debate, they only pronounce and denounce. According to their apparent standards, it is not possible to give a blanket consent to be touched. You cannot wake your lover/spouse with a kiss, for instance. I am a serial offender because I grab my husband's behind when tempted. Which is frequently. How do they square "get out of my bedroom, Texas" with policies that give THEM the authority to define consent in all intimate encounters?; 6/29/18, 10:39 AM
MayBee said...: I hate it that #metoo is being treated as if everyone who said that on Facebook has the same goals; 6/29/18, 10:46 AM
Ignorance is Bliss said...: Shouting Thomas said...

The rest of the time, I find you to be a very adept and penetration legal thinker.

I see what you did. You thought you could just slip that in there, without even asking...; 6/29/18, 10:49 AM
tim maguire said...: Jack Donaghy would openly laugh at Alec Baldwin.

How pathetic. No. I do not let the current trend in intellectualized whinging determine how I interact with my wife. Nor does she with me. We decide for ourselves how best to interact with each other. That's part of what it means to be married. Which Alec Baldwin would instinctively know if he weren't such a sniveling crapweasel.; 6/29/18, 11:01 AM
Jupiter said...: Shouting Thomas said...

"I rejected feminism 30 years ago as patent nonsense."

Hmmmmm.... There's an awful lot of stuff that's been considered "feminism" at one time or another. Not all of it is patent nonsense. I recall being fairly sympathetic, when I was 20 or so, to the idea that our culture offered a lot more possibilities to men than it did to women. But as I got older, I realized that as life's imperfections go, that is a fairly trivial one.; 6/29/18, 11:02 AM
caplight45 said...: When I stopped at Quik Trip for my morning coffee the twenty-something pretty red head behind the counter thanked me and then said, “Have a good day honey.” I’m 66 years old. I assume it was just an innocent Red State kindness.; 6/29/18, 11:05 AM
grackle said...: Or is it just fine that you've given yourself fully to each other and that there's a floating, ongoing "yes" that applies until there's an actual, verbalized "no"?

It sounds so formal. “Dear, would you mind terribly if I got rid of this boner?”

Shouldn’t spouses be more attuned to each other’s moods? I always knew when I wasn’t going to get sex. Their mood told me.

I never allow a female companion to forget they are desirable – unless of course their mood tells me otherwise. It’s called ‘flirting’ and it’s fun and informative as to a spouse’s receptiveness if offered and received in a light-hearted atmosphere. Granted, there are certain situations when it is inappropriate and would fall flat.

Most young men would screw a knothole if it had a pair of tits. I find that I am more fussy in my reclining years.; 6/29/18, 11:12 AM
Roughcoat said...: This comment has been removed by the author.; 6/29/18, 11:19 AM
Scott M said...: Do you need to reexamine what you've been doing to your wife all these years... and what she's been doing to you?

If you do, your marriage is a sham and at least one, if not both, of you are psychologically in trouble.; 6/29/18, 11:28 AM
Charlotte Allen said...: Call me old-fashioned, but when you say "I do" to the marriage, you say "I do" to the sex. If you don't feel like sleeping with your husband, don't marry him. The only valid reasons for turning down marital sex are: 1) You're dead; 2) You're really sick (not just "tired," not just a "headache"; 3) You've just undergone a serious medical procedure; 4) You've discovered he's a psycho, a criminal, or an adulterer.; 6/29/18, 11:33 AM
Anthony said...: I don't do anything different with the Spousal Unit but I sure as hell watch myself around anyone I deem 'progressive'. . . . .

OTOH, it's almost become a joke. A fellow IT guy and I were discussing dongles at work a while back and there were young females around and I said "Hey, maybe we shouldn't be discussing 'dongles' or we're gonna get #MeToo'd right outta here."; 6/29/18, 11:33 AM
walter said...: But hey..they might have dongles too.
You shouldn't assume.; 6/29/18, 11:46 AM
Achilles said...: Shouting Thomas said...

U.S. women are the most privileged, richest, most politically powerful and safest group of people in human history.

This needs to be emphasized.

Male rates for dropping out of school, incarceration, death by violence, suicide, workplace death and injury, and life expectancy are all massively measurably worse than for women.

Almost 60% of college graduates are women.

By every objective measure women are treated better in our society than men.

And it still isn't enough?

This is the left using emotionalism to tear the fabric of our society apart.; 6/29/18, 12:19 PM
stevew said...: "We'll it's occurred to you now. You can't unsee the question."

No, it still didn't occure to me, I bumped into on your fine blog and this particular post! You are correct though, I am no longer ignorant that the question exists, and having considered it must answer in the negative.

Do actual rapists, you know, the "rape rape" ones, experience the Baldwin expressed crisis of conscience?

-sw; 6/29/18, 12:22 PM
Dust Bunny Queen said...: You are correct though, I am no longer ignorant that the question exists, and having considered it must answer in the negative.

Actually, there is no 'must' or need to answer a question. This question or any other one. You can decide the question is irrelevant, impertinent, a waste of time or ridiculous.

Ignoring, I suppose, can be an answer. One that I often choose.; 6/29/18, 12:35 PM
n.n said...: By the time you reach adulthood, you should be firm in your convictions as a male or female chauvinist, or reconciled equal in rights and complementary in Nature to realize a male-female couple synthesis.; 6/29/18, 12:35 PM
Bay Area Guy said...: The #Metoo movement hasn't affected me, because I'm a boring, married guy.

But I definitely see how it has affected my sons. There's a wedge between the sexes now. Flirting is dangerous, may be misconstrued. Asking out on dates is dangerous, may get rejected, and posted all over Instagram. Dancing with women is dangerous, may inadvertently touch them or misread the signals.

The left has thrown down so many mines, grenades, and tripwires, that it's easy to get blown up. Add condoms, and promotion of anal sex, and promotion of gay lifestyle and fear of microaggressions and sexual harassment into the stew, and you have a minefield to navigate thru.

When I was young and single, there was only one significant worry -- getting a girl pregnant. Flirting, dating, dancing all seemed to naturally occur without much angst.; 6/29/18, 12:39 PM
bagoh20 said...: No effect. I continue to allow women to rape me at will. If any of them get immensely rich, I will consider coming out with my "story".; 6/29/18, 12:42 PM
Ryan said...: If it is rape to have sex against one's will, is it also a form of reverse-rape to NOT have sex with your husband for 2 years straight? Especially when your religion prevents masturbation?

Not a hypothetical question, because this happened to someone I know well.; 6/29/18, 12:59 PM
Ryan said...: What's worse: a 10-minute rape or 2 years of forced celibacy?; 6/29/18, 1:00 PM
FIDO said...: "I've been married to the same woman for nearly 38 years and this question has never occurred to me or come up. So, no."

We'll it's occurred to you now. You can't unsee the question.

Sorry, Unknown. Mistress Althouse has a strict policy that if a woman is not already horny as a stoat when approached, that any sex that she might have afterward, whatever her motives for engaging in the act, is rape and she pushes that narrative at every opportunity.

To be fair, she gives that same 'discretion' to men as well, however laughable that equivalency.; 6/29/18, 1:02 PM
Bruce Hayden said...: I can’t take Alec Baldwin seriously since his performance in Team America, World Police”, where he plays the head of FAG (Film Actors Guild). Kim Jung Il had serious pronunciation issues with English words in the movie, including a problem pronouncing “L”s. Since watching the movie the first time, I have been incapable of pronouncing Baldwin’s name normally, but instead, use the Kim Jung Il pronunciation. Or, of taking him the least bit seriously.; 6/29/18, 1:07 PM
FIDO said...: I think that someone in the press should be asking Kim Basinger some pointed questions about her 'Me Too' issues, since Alex seems to be projecting.; 6/29/18, 1:07 PM
FIDO said...: Alec. I don't care enough about the guy to care what his spelling of preference is.; 6/29/18, 1:08 PM
bagoh20 said...: If I'm ever accused of sexual assault, I'll use the Rosenstein defense and claim to know nothing about sex, since I have people that handle that work for me, then I'll threaten to sexually assault the cops for asking me.; 6/29/18, 1:11 PM
Fernandinande said...: You can't unsee the question.

It will be forgotten by everyone in a few minutes, hours or days.; 6/29/18, 1:15 PM
bagoh20 said...: The left ruins everything it touches. They even make sex so ugly that men are refusing even the opportunity to get it. Nice work, snowflakes.; 6/29/18, 1:15 PM
mockturtle said...: It will be forgotten by everyone in a few minutes, hours or days.

I've forgotten it already.; 6/29/18, 2:12 PM
Floris said...: According to third-wave feminist theory, no heterosexual sex can ever be truly consensual because of the power imbalance between men and women. Women may think they are consenting, but that is only because they are insufficiently "woke". In Marxist theory, they are suffering from something called false consciousness. Believe it or not, this stuff is actually taught by actual people in actual universities.; 6/29/18, 2:17 PM
FIDO said...: It will be forgotten by everyone in a few minutes, hours or days.

This is what should happen to narrative concern trolling.; 6/29/18, 2:17 PM
Bunk said...: I live in southern Arizona. My 60-yr old friend has a girlfriend just over the border that's half his age. He provides her with economic support; she provides him with sex on demand. She says, "I'm your girlfriend. It's my job." This has been going on for 2+years.

He says he will never date another American woman. He's ruined.

I want to move to Mexico but my wife won't let me.; 6/29/18, 2:20 PM
mockturtle said...: This comment has been removed by the author.; 6/29/18, 2:24 PM
mockturtle said...: Bunk reports: I live in southern Arizona. My 60-yr old friend has a girlfriend just over the border that's half his age. He provides her with economic support; she provides him with sex on demand. She says, "I'm your girlfriend. It's my job."

Sounds like a fair business deal. No tariffs, I hope.; 6/29/18, 2:26 PM
Sebastian said...: "I'm your girlfriend. It's my job."

Her only job?; 6/29/18, 2:45 PM
bagoh20 said...: "Her only job?"

A healthy business requires a steady supply of new customers.; 6/29/18, 3:14 PM
Gahrie said...: If it is rape to have sex against one's will, is it also a form of reverse-rape to NOT have sex with your husband for 2 years straight? Especially when your religion prevents masturbation?

Not according to Althouse. As she sees it the problem lies with the splooge stooge. In fact he shouldn't even want sex, since it is clear that his wife doesn't.; 6/29/18, 3:15 PM
Kate said...: Why no "that's not funny" tag? (Or whatever you've named it!) Baldwin's cracking a joke and the Daily Beast writes an entire article about how seriously tasteless it is.

No matter how much of a horrible person Baldwin is in person, he's a very good comedian. Can't wait to watch.; 6/29/18, 3:16 PM
Gahrie said...: By every objective measure women are treated better in our society than men.

And it still isn't enough?

Since when has any woman ever had "enough" of anything she wants?; 6/29/18, 3:17 PM
Ignorance is Bliss said...: Gahrie said...

Since when has any woman ever had "enough" of anything she wants?

Well, I always leave them satisfied, but YMMV.; 6/29/18, 3:32 PM
Patrick Henry was right! said...: Its theoretically possible that a no might be uttered in the future, but none so far, 35 years and counting.; 6/29/18, 3:51 PM
Ann Althouse said...: “If it is rape to have sex against one's will, is it also a form of reverse-rape to NOT have sex with your husband for 2 years straight? ”

The one who doesn’t want sex must prevail. The other can only hope to find a way to change that person’s mind. They married for better or worse, and that is one of the worse things.

How can there be any other answer? You cannot have sex with a person who doesn’t want it, and if this person offers to give it without wanting it, you should say that’s not something you want.

Life can be a little tough sometimes, but it better than getting cancer.; 6/29/18, 4:13 PM
Ingachuck'stoothlessARM said...: "I'm very careful. My wife has a black belt in Marital Arts"; 6/29/18, 4:27 PM
mockturtle said...: Again I would quote the Apostle Paul from 1 Corinthians 7:4,5: "The wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband. Likewise the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife. Do not deprive one another, except by mutual consent for a limited time, so you may devote yourselves to prayer. Then come together again, so that Satan will not tempt you through your lack of self-control."

This makes perfect sense to me if one believes that a man and woman become one flesh when they marry. Of course, rape or other abuse is not condoned here but it's selfish to withhold sex from one's spouse even if you're 'not in the mood'.; 6/29/18, 4:36 PM
n.n said...: Since when has any woman ever had "enough" of anything she wants?

Self-moderating and responsible? They do exist. Men, too.; 6/29/18, 4:37 PM
n.n said...: The wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband. Likewise the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife.

Synthesis... should not be limited to your body.

Do not deprive one another, except by mutual consent for a limited time, so you may devote yourselves to prayer. Then come together again, so that Satan will not tempt you through your lack of self-control.

An appreciation of reality, with a period to earn consent. We're not children anymore.; 6/29/18, 4:44 PM
Bob Loblaw said...: " Or is it just fine that you've given yourself fully to each other and that there's a floating, ongoing 'yes' that applies until there's an actual, verbalized 'no'?"

This used to be called marriage.

Yep. Feminism: Ruining healthy relationships for three or four generations now.; 6/29/18, 4:50 PM
mikee said...: #MeToo has as much to do with my family life as it does with Bill Clinton's previous rapes/assaults/harassments/adulteries. That is, #MeToo doesn't know I even exist, exactly the same as it treats good old Bill, the rapist.; 6/29/18, 4:51 PM
roger said...: "I've been married to the same woman for nearly 38 years and this question has never occurred to me or come up. So, no."

Althouse: We'll it's occurred to you now. You can't unsee the question.

Dont be ridiculous. I am not obligated to respond in any fashion to these or any other fools. We have been married 30 years. Anything that Baldwin or Seinfeld promote or foist upon popular culture is entirely outside of any obligation for a response from me. I will not be manipulated in this manner.; 6/29/18, 5:01 PM
Portlandmermaid said...: I watch Comedians in Cars on Netflix on the nights I just can't get to sleep and need a reprieve from anxiety.

The ones I watch repeatedly, for some great bits are Norm McDonald, Alec Baldwin, Brian Regan, Ricky Gervais, Garry Shandling, Robert Klein, and Sebastian Maniscalsco.

What was the question? Oh, yeah. After 25 years of marriage, my husband and I are pretty tuned in to each other. We don't have to quiz each other before we express affection.; 6/29/18, 6:26 PM
FIDO said...: How can there be any other answer? You cannot have sex with a person who doesn’t want it, and if this person offers to give it without wanting it, you should say that’s not something you want.

Remarkably, I REALLY don't want to change the oil in my car. I don't want to paint the fence. I don't have a deep seated need to paint the fence. And that 'job' thing can be a real downer, particularly since She started making money. And seeing Her mom...not in the cards at ALL!

So this 'no one should demand anything you don't want to do, even if it changing one's mind LONG after the 'I Do's'...does that apply to other stuff too?

So...if in an act of generosity, I offer my body to my wife, even if I am not in the mood...then I am raped? If she is semi bored and acquiesces and gets into it after a while, is it rape in the beginning and not rape after her motor starts running, or is it always a 'half rape'?

Because this 'violation of free will' standard essentially delegates NO expectations from the spouse on any physical level, and essentially telling them to (non sexually) 'Suck it!' and they can't complain because this is the 'worse' those vows were talking about.

While I have zero doubt that some women are like Althouse and want to carve out HUGE exceptions for THEIR sexual output, I doubt they would offer such charity to men when it came to...oh...pretty much anything else, because in my experience, even a 5 minute wait for taking out the garbage seems far too long for most wives even if the game is on.; 6/29/18, 6:32 PM
Gahrie said...: @FIDO:

But you wife shouldn't want the garbage taken out if you don't want to take it out.; 6/29/18, 6:43 PM
tim in vermont said...: One free grope, renewable daily.; 6/29/18, 7:26 PM
FIDO said...: This comment has been removed by the author.; 6/29/18, 7:29 PM
Charlotte Allen said...: The one who doesn’t want sex must prevail. The other can only hope to find a way to change that person’s mind. They married for better or worse, and that is one of the worse things.

How can there be any other answer? You cannot have sex with a person who doesn’t want it, and if this person offers to give it without wanting it, you should say that’s not something you want.

Oh, come on!

All a woman has to do is lie on her back and relax. No effort whatsoever, and you make your husband happy--and dimes to donuts you'll feel really good, too. At worst, you can just doze off. That's what's so great about the missionary position--it's designed for women.

Why does marital sex have to be some complex negotiation between some poor guy who just wants to sleep with his wife and the wife who's saying, "Well, maybe tomorrow or next week"? The key to a happy marriage for a woman is always to say yes to sex. It costs a woman nothing. And your husband will be so grateful.; 6/29/18, 8:22 PM
mockturtle said...: All a woman has to do is lie on her back and relax.

And think of the Empire! ;-)

The key to a happy marriage for a woman is always to say yes to sex. It costs a woman nothing. And your husband will be so grateful.

Amen! And most of the time it's enjoyable for both of you even if you didn't 'feel like it'!; 6/29/18, 8:35 PM
Howard said...: Blogger Achilles said...

Shouting Thomas said...

U.S. women are the most privileged, richest, most politically powerful and safest group of people in human history.

This needs to be emphasized.

Male rates for dropping out of school, incarceration, death by violence, suicide, workplace death and injury, and life expectancy are all massively measurably worse than for women.

Almost 60% of college graduates are women.

By every objective measure women are treated better in our society than men.

And it still isn't enough?

This is the left using emotionalism to tear the fabric of our society apart.

Boo fucking hoo, Cuck. Our job is to take care of women, not to piss and moan about how hard you and your sob-sister boyfriends got it.; 6/29/18, 8:42 PM
Achilles said...: Howard said...

Boo fucking hoo, Cuck. Our job is to take care of women, not to piss and moan about how hard you and your sob-sister boyfriends got it.

Like I said. Their only goal is to tear the fabric of our civil society apart.

If they want to act like animals they should be treated the same way.; 6/29/18, 8:52 PM
Achilles said...: bagoh20 said...

The left ruins everything it touches. They even make sex so ugly that men are refusing even the opportunity to get it. Nice work, snowflakes.

Angry people are more prone to revolutions.

Sex bots can't cum fast enough.; 6/29/18, 8:56 PM
Shouting Thomas said...: When it comes to anything feminist, Althouse morphs from a reasonable, intelligent woman into a Marxist fucking loon.

She's completely nuts about this shit. And, the question is, why?

She's led a charmed life. This behavior on her part is part execrable, part ridiculous.

The only answer I can think of is that my father's generation's stereotype of women is 100% accurate... No matter what women have they will find something to bitch about.; 6/29/18, 9:38 PM
Ambrose said...: Alec Baldwin being vigilant about anything is worth the price of admission to a Trump Presidency.; 6/29/18, 11:29 PM
FIDO said...: Shouting Thomas

Except for an unhealthy and unwarranted admiration for Ruth Bathory Ginsberg (or as I call her, Ol' Giddy), an absolutist bent on having ZERO sexual obligations to anyone with the equally ridiculous perchance to calling the slightest of pressure to engage as rape, and an on and off again bit of Blue Stocking Church Lady Syndrome, where men wanting women is icky, Ms. Althouse is, unlike many Feminists, rather hard ON Feminists.

To wit: she had the courage to ask if maybe some of these actresses were actually whores...though she backed away from that rather quickly.

She thinks #MeToo is fraught with abuse, and she made Marge Simpson disapproving noises at the doxing by that one website regarding Aziz's 'bad date'.

So what am I missing about her supposed ridiculous levels of Feminism? Compared to a Michelle Goldberg, much less more insane Feminists, Althouse seems at least approachable about issues.

And as far as socialism goes, she's rather comfortable here, thanks. That dog don't hunt.; 6/30/18, 1:12 AM