July 20, 2023

"[D]ogs walking on the main streets must have their DNA on file with the local government. People must carry dog 'passports'..."

"... to prove they complied. If dog poop is found, the city will be authorized to test it to uncover which dog did it. And the owner will be forced to pay for the cleanup.... While [the mayor's] dog poop crackdown is a temporary test, set to last until July 2025, it is sure to raise some eyebrows in France, where individual liberty is cherished above all else — it’s the first of three values listed in the country’s national motto. While the country is known for its bureaucracy, or 'paperasserie,' and for the number of rules and regulations on its books, those rules are not always respected...."

From "This mayor, tired of poop on his streets, is making dogs get passports" (WaPo). The city is Béziers, in southern France, and it's been around since 575 BCE.

35 comments:

Kate said...

Paper-Assery for bureaucracy. Usually I think of the Germans for inventing great words, but this is first class.

BUMBLE BEE said...

Losing their liberty over dogshit? How American of them!

Original Mike said...

"And the owner will be forced to pay for the cleanup.... "

Isn't a DNA test a lot more expensive than a pooper scooper?

MikeD said...

Yet, here in the good ol' USA, humans can "poop" wherever they like without consequence?

rcocean said...

575 years before the birth of Jesus Christ. that is a long time.

Michael K said...

Is San Francisco considering this for identifying those who poop on the sidewalk ?

Of course not.

Ambrose said...

DNA on file? - Tell me this is not a dry run for humans.

walter said...

San Francisco take note...or not.
I remember riding the Metro in Paris and discovering the horrible smell I was experiencing was coming from a young uniformed dude with a slight smirk straggling his big bag of dog shit.

wild chicken said...

Let the dogs run free and they'll clean it up themselves.

Dogs eat shit.

Narr said...

"those rules are not always respected."

Vive la France!

selfanalyst said...

If you can be sure which dog/owner combination is responsible for poop, perfect solution is to smear said dog with poop, whether surreptitiously or boldly, depending on your personality. Doesn't hurt the dog in the least, but imposes great inconvenience on the owner.

Mary Beth said...

Individual liberty is cherished, but they still want to have dog passports. Perhaps it is just bureaucrats cratting, but maybe people are really fed up with stepping in dog poop.

Rocco said...

No dog is illegal.

Lilly, a dog said...

As a dog, I can say with confidence that my ancestors pooped in Gaul anywhere they wished. My four-legged Gallic canine friends will continue to poop anywhere they wish.

Whiskeybum said...

The city is Béziers, in southern France, and it's been around since 575 BCE.

And for those of you who don't like the metric system, that's 575 BC.

Jeremy said...

It’s sure to raise eyebrows? Has it, in fact, raised any eyebrows? “Sure to raise eyebrows” is cliche from some celebrity gossip rag, not something that a self-respecting journalist would write without irony. I know, know. Forget it Jake.

Gahrie said...

Wouldn't it be incredibly cheaper to simply hire someone to walk around and clean up the dog crap? Make the salary part of the dog licensing fee if you want to.

Aggie said...

It used to be they just recorded births, deaths, and marriages, with quill pens. Now it's your dog's poop-DNA. Talk about mission creep, in the absolute worst direction.

Aggie said...

I mean, seriously, what person doesn't immediately think, 'man if I ever go through that town I'm hauling in at least 5 lb of dog shit, coyote scat, bear crap, and even rhino turds, just to scatter it around and drive them nuts.' A good pile of elephant dung is about knee high, just imagine the possibilities, leave a gigantic steaming pile, right in the middle of town.

Biff said...

I've traveled to Paris quite a bit over the past few years, and I've been surprised at the impressive amount of dog poop on the sidewalks. Especially in residential neighborhoods, you really do have to watch your step.

walter said...

I want to see the "most wanted" posters.

Rocco said...

Aggie said...
"If I ever go through that town I'm hauling in at least 5 lb of dog shit, coyote scat, bear crap, and even rhino turds, just to scatter it around and drive them nuts.' A good pile of elephant dung is about knee high, just imagine the possibilities, leave a gigantic steaming pile, right in the middle of town."

Dinosaur poop. Remember the scene in Jurassic Park.

Rocco said...

walter said...
"I want to see the 'most wanted' posters."

Wanted for public defecation on 20 Jul 2023: CAGGCTATTACCGTA....

Leland said...

That law is full of shit.

Jaq said...

What a turnaround. I remember going to Paris in 1999, I remember this because the Eiffel Tower was decorated for the millennium, and there was dog poop everywhere on the streets and sidewalks; "pooper scoopers" had recently become a thing in NYC, IIRC.

gspencer said...

Of course! Another bureaucracy. That'll do it. A gun-control comparison. Only law-abiding dog owners will comply with this DNA/dog-passport nonsense, the very people who, because they are law-abiding and pick up after their dogs, are not the cause of the dog poop problem.

Jaq said...

Maybe they can use AI and the DNA to create an image of the dog for the wanted posters.

Barry Dauphin said...

Can they test the DNA on bags of cocaine?

EAB said...

My sister was in Paris a few years back and said there was dog poop everywhere. It’s the main thing she noticed.

BUMBLE BEE said...

I remember during the early 60s my brother was stationed in France. He said Paris was the dirtiest city one could imagine... lotsa poo.

Rocco said...

tim in vermont said...
"Maybe they can use AI and the DNA to create an image of the dog for the wanted posters."

Sure, that's how it will start. But it will end up with Terminator meets Jurassic Park.

Narr said...

I didn't notice an inordinate amount of dog poop during my one brief visit to Paris in '17, but maybe I was too euphoric to notice.

Never been to Beziers. Sounds nice, except for the poop.

mikee said...

I, for one, think everyone should make a list of people with canine pets whose DNA-certifiable "doggy do" it would be fun to obtain and place in public, for DNA testing. Start with those who voted this idiocy into law, I'd suggest, and go from there. Notice to news reporters might be called for if the owners are cited.

Like the old and infamous Mr. Bone's Wild Ride, it is the ride that hurts, not the payment.

KellyM said...

On every one of my visits to Paris in the 90s and early 2000s, the dog poo was everywhere. Between the poo and the errant motorscooter drivers, the sidewalks were more dangerous than walking in the street.

Irony of ironies: Here in SF, Nosy Parker strangers will give you grief for not picking up after your dog, but those same individuals won't say boo about the human poo on the streets. SMH

Free Manure While You Wait! said...

"If dog poop is found, the city will be authorized to test it to uncover which dog did it."

Das Leben Anderer Hunde.

Seriously.

And if I hate my next door neighbor and his dog, I can just scoop up a little of the dog waste in their yard and toss it into the mayor's.