From a New Yorker humor piece by Dennard Dayle, "I Will Not Board a Plane to Visit Your Baby."
Me:Am I doing something wrong if I decline to visit a friend who wants me to come over just to see their baby?
ChatGPT
No, declining a visit to see a friend's baby does not necessarily mean you are doing something wrong. There can be various reasons why you might choose not to visit, and it is important to prioritize your own needs and well-being.
Here are a few possible reasons why you might decline the invitation:1. Personal commitments: You might have other obligations or commitments that prevent you from visiting, such as work, family responsibilities, or prior engagements. It's essential to manage your time effectively and make choices based on your own schedule and priorities.2. Distance or logistics: If the friend lives far away or the visit requires significant travel time, it might not be feasible or convenient for you to make the trip. Consider the practicality of the visit and whether it aligns with your current circumstances.3. Health concerns: If you are feeling unwell, have a compromised immune system, or are concerned about the risk of spreading or contracting an illness, it is perfectly valid to prioritize your health and avoid unnecessary exposure.4. Personal boundaries: Everyone has different comfort levels when it comes to socializing or visiting others. If you feel overwhelmed or prefer to have some personal space, it's important to communicate your needs and set boundaries accordingly. Respect your own emotional well-being and make choices that align with your comfort level.5. Other reasons: There can be various other factors influencing your decision, such as financial constraints, personal preferences, or simply not feeling up to socializing at the moment. Trust your instincts and make choices that are best for you.It's important to communicate your decision to your friend respectfully and honestly. Let them know that while you appreciate their invitation, you are unable to visit at this time. Maintaining open and honest communication can help foster understanding and ensure a healthy friendship.
Me:
What if I know that the true reason is that I'm not interest[ed] in seeing a baby, it's a boring thing to do, and little babies are, in my view, all alike?
ChatGPT
It's understandable that you may not find visiting a baby to be personally engaging or interesting. People have different preferences and interests, and it's okay to have your own perspective on what you find enjoyable or stimulating.
However, it's important to approach the situation with sensitivity and respect for your friend's feelings. While you may not share the same enthusiasm for seeing their baby, they might be excited to share this significant moment in their life with you.
Here are a few suggestions on how to navigate the situation:
1. Be considerate: Recognize that your friend's invitation likely stems from a place of joy and pride. Even if you're not particularly interested in babies, try to empathize with their excitement and acknowledge the significance of this event in their life.
2. Express your feelings diplomatically: Instead of outright dismissing the idea or expressing disinterest, you can choose to communicate your feelings in a gentle and diplomatic manner. You can thank your friend for the invitation and explain that while you may not be personally interested in visiting babies, you are happy for them and appreciate their desire to share this experience with you.
3. Offer alternative ways to connect: If you're not interested in visiting the baby, consider suggesting alternative ways to spend time with your friend. You could propose meeting up for a coffee or engaging in an activity that you both enjoy. This allows you to maintain the connection and spend time together without necessarily focusing on the baby.
4. Be understanding: Understand that your friend's priorities have shifted with the arrival of their baby, and they may be more immersed in that aspect of their life for a while. Be patient and understanding of their new responsibilities and commitments.
Remember, maintaining a healthy and respectful friendship means considering each other's feelings and finding common ground. It's okay to have differing interests, as long as you approach the situation with empathy and open communication.
Me:
Are you saying it's okay for me to be a bad person if I'm polite about avoiding things that I don't want to do?
ChatGPT:
No, that is not what I'm saying at all. Polite and respectful communication is important in maintaining healthy relationships, but it doesn't make someone a "bad person" for having personal preferences or interests
Being a good person is not solely determined by whether you find certain activities interesting or enjoyable. It's about how you treat others, show empathy, and respect their feelings and boundaries.
In this case, if you choose not to visit your friend's baby but communicate your decision politely and respectfully, you are demonstrating consideration for their feelings while still maintaining your own boundaries. It's perfectly acceptable to have different interests and preferences, as long as you approach the situation with kindness and understanding.
It's important to remember that we all have our own unique perspectives and preferences, and it's natural for them to differ from person to person. As long as you treat others with respect, honesty, and kindness, it does not make you a "bad person" for having different views or preferences.
পোস্টগুলি
১১৩টি মন্তব্য:
I'd say he sounds like a Biden, except that it's not his own grandchild.
"Babies on a plane" Could be a movie.
Not funny.
The Left hates kids. The Left wants to reduce the population in order to save the planet.
These are mentally ill people.
I mean, who doesn't love babies? Yeah, they cry but that's part of the deal. Grow up. Be an adult.
BTW, Malthus was dead wrong.
I sympathize with this. I had my 2nd child last year and recently travelled with him to visit family. Despite my best efforts the tricks my wife and I use to keep him mollified just did not work, largely because the environmental control system on the 737 was not keeping pace with altitude changes, resulting in some pressure curves that were uncomfortable even for me.
I used to be this guy. I don't like crying babies on airplanes either, and there wasn't an insignificant amount of discomfort with knowing it was my child that wouldn't go back to sleep.
In a perfect world airplanes would have a section for this just like they have business class or 1st class. The problem is that the section for parents with small children would be THE WORST PLACE ON ANY AIRPLANE CONCEIVED. EVER.
Reminds me of the great Simpsons episode, "Marge vs. Singles, Seniors, Childless Couples and Teens, and Gays" which was actually really funny and thoughtful
Dennard Dayle is alleged to be a "humor" writer?
Didn't even crack a smile, not once.
Maybe the New Yorker has a different concept of "humor," from mine. Bitter and sad.
I share the sentiment of the writer, even if the article is sort of stupidly written.
But I need to know about the apparent premise of it, which seems completely concocted to me. Do parents of newborns expect friends, siblings or random guys from high school to get on a plane and fly for hours just to see their new baby? Do (a lot of) people do this? Well, maybe grandmothers with first grandchild, now and then, sure. But otherwise, is this a thing? I don't think I've ever heard of this in all these years.
More generally - I submit, almost always - don't we just get an announcement with newborn baby pic by text/email/Facebook; look at the pic; think "Oh, that's nice. Geez, they all look alike, don't they?"; text Mom back that he is exceptionally beautiful; then delete the announcement and pic?
Who does this guy think will be paying into Social Security when he wants to collect?
It's not about babies on a plane. It's about demands that you come see the baby when you'd have to take a plane to do that.
Long ago, Seinfeld did material on "You gotta see the baby."
If you have a friend that has had a baby, that becomes reason why you must visit when the truth is you'd prefer to see the friend without the baby as the centerpiece.
Why see a baby?
He's right in line with most Democrats...kill all babies.
This passes for humor on the left.
"Why see a baby?"
Right? They're not even interesting yet. Unless you're Gramma a d can help out.
Are you sure it's a humor piece?
A woman on pregnancy leave will visit the office with her newborn, and all the ladies will play pass-the-baby. Men are not invited to play.
"It's about demands that you come see the baby when you'd have to take a plane to do that."
Thank you, I didn't understand "I will not board a plane for your baby."
You've seen one baby, you've seen them all, IMO.
From a New Yorker humor piece by Dennard Dayle
@Althouse, you lefties have a strange sense of what’s humorous.
Why see a baby?
You couldn’t possibly understand the answer.
LOL.
Who needs babies when we have 7 million new illegal entrants to house, feed and support.
I am totally confused, who has ever asked someone to fly to see their baby?
This is 100% fake. I am 58 years old and I've never heard someone say this or even intimate it to a friend.
Funny how all leftists want somebody else to reduce the population. Maybe they should take the lead on this to save the planet.
Points for citing Malthus and expecting us to know the implications. One of history's greatest monsters, he's an under-appreciated villain.
"A woman on pregnancy leave will visit the office with her newborn, and all the ladies will play pass-the-baby. Men are not invited to play."
Another way to put that is, in the presence of a baby, women feel pressure to demonstrate to themselves and others that they possess an attractive amount of warmth and empathy. Men are free to follow their actual interests.
The consequences of not giving the New Yorker clicks. The benefits still outweigh the penalties.
It took me a while to understand that he meant flying somewhere to admire some infant, rather than merely flying in the presence of one.
SRSLY? People do this, and/or expect other people to do this? People send my wife pix of their darlings all the time, and she enjoys it, but not even she would take an airplane flight for them.
At work, when women brought their babies in, I made myself scarce.
@Althouse (9:32), my take is a bit different from yours (fancy that). For the couple, the baby is one of the biggest things thst’s ever happened to them. They invite their friends and close acquaintances to participate in their joy and happiness. It wouldn’t surprise me if this behavior wasn’t very, very ancient — possibly even dating back to before genus homo arose along the hominids.
want Proof, that whoever wrote this, was FULL of Sh*t?
Every day I awake and think of innovative new ways to reduce the population.
I write them on the back of a photo of Malthus
???
Where is "the population" growing?
How is "the population" growing?
WHO is "the population" growing?
The population of the USA is NOT growing internally.. ANY population increases do NOT come internally
The Only Way to "reduce the population" is immediate thermonuclear strikes on India (and China)..
Western Nations aren't Dying.. They are Already DEAD.. The East WON
"It's about demands that you come see the baby when you'd have to take a plane to do that."
so, are these the follow ons to: Destination Weddings??
People sure do jump to a buncha conclusions, don't they!
This is like when you watch a Deadliest Catch episode and the nets all come back filled to bursting with giant crabs. Good fishing, Althouse!
I'll skip the poetry reading and the baby shower, thanks. I'll be at the sports bar with the Dad and his bros during that shower. I may have even organized that myself...
I'm in a group that gives lots of free concerts in our town. Often we get an exploding baby/toddler in the house - I long since let my happiness at seeing the parents be able to get out and enjoy the show and let the kid get the experience override my horror at the artistic disruption. Nobody paid for the ticket, so get over it.
Not convinced that piece needed to be written, but I guess I prefer the general attitude of "But I don’t live in your village. Or state. Or time zone" to, All the children belong to all of us! (Usually this is emotional manipulation on behalf of some incredibly ill-considered policy recommendation.)
I just saw the Added. Like others here I really didn't know pressure to come see a baby was a thing. I've never applied it, nor been subjected to it.
But through a ruthless process of attrition over the years, my friends are pretty much the type where the conversation would involve a friendly invitation. Declining this would involve no guilt or ill feeling. I've always sympathized with the Florence King response, "I'd love to but I just don't want to."
People starting a family can find it stressful and atomizing. You needn't visit in person. But if they are friends of yours, show your friendship by staying in touch.
Sometimes, you discover that people you regarded as friends were just socially agile acquaintances. So it goes.
Critical Question: WHO is this piece for? His sister? Daughter? College buddy? I don't have many (or any) clicks left for the New Yorker so I don't know who is asking him to travel by plane to see a baby.
I don't get the annoyance (or faux annoyance) at situations like these, or at getting invited to a wedding you don't want to go to. If you're not close to the couple, make up an excuse and don't go. Lie. It's better than seething and bringing others down.
BONUS: These pieces are written by a class of folks who still 1. marry and 2. have kids. Middle class families increasingly do not have to deal with the annoyance of celebrating the taking of lifelong vows or the creation of life.
Comment head when a baby was brought to work
Cow-orker
"How beautiful! She has her father's eyes "
Mother
"but she has my husband's nose"
And
"she is quite breathtaking"
John Henry
At my age it's a struggle to visit the grandchildren. My daughter-in-law in Africa is pregnant with their first. I will not get there.
I don't find this funny.
I do have a reaction to the statement: "Every day I awake and think of innovative new ways to reduce the population."
Try suicide!
When a friend offers to share their new baby with you that is a showing of love and honor towards you. But like funerals, rejection of the invite is all up to you. Maybe staying a close semi family member has no interest for you. Why waste your precious time.
@Althouse: Another way to put that is, in the presence of a baby, women feel pressure to demonstrate to themselves and others that they possess an attractive amount of warmth and empathy.
Kittens. Puppies. Babies.
Another way to put that is women can't help themselves.
Men can.
Evolution didn't stop at the neckline.
"women feel pressure to demonstrate to themselves and others"
Haha ain't it the truth.
Well, Dayle could kill himself- that would be a 1 minus in his Malthus Play Book.
“The Left hates kids. The Left wants to reduce the population in order to save the planet.”
What simplistic nonsense. Or are you attempting humor? Millions of people on the left have children and families and love children, I’m one of them. Do you think every woman on the left wants an abortion when she becomes pregnant? It doesn’t even occur to you that women on the left desire to have children and are thrilled when they become pregnant or even intentionally try to get pregnant? Do you even know any real live people on the left that you aren’t trying to control with some legal action?
As for getting on a plane to see someone’s baby…
If the person/ couple who had the baby would be happy to know you treasure their friendship/ kinship enough to do something that makes you uncomfortable then it might be worth doing even if you aren’t interested in the baby at all. If you know or worry that you may hurt the friend/relative’s feelings by avoiding visiting because it’s an inconvenience or uninteresting for you, then you must face the consequences of doing so. Friendships/family relationships are a two way street, if one of the people in that relationship can’t be bothered to do something for the other person in that relationship, then that relationship is probably not going to last, or will be harmed. Does it make you a bad person, IMO, no but a self centered one, which is neither wrong or right, just an observation.
Selflessness is something we may be called on to learn in this lifetime.
Such a strange article. "A woman on pregnancy leave will visit the office with her newborn, and all the ladies will play pass-the-baby. Men are not invited to play."
When a baby comes to my work, the men are just as interested in holding the baby. Especially the dads of teen children who are thinking, “maybe we should have just one more”.
"Jerry, ya gotta see the baby!"
I asked ChatGPT: Am I doing something wrong if ...
Damn this AI! Just when you thought standing in the unemployment line couldn't be any less fun now there's going to be priests standing there with us.
This isn't exactly the first time that a comic has taken an offhand, not-really-serious remark like "Oh, we'd love it if you came to visit" and spun it into something socially obtuse, allowing the audience to join the comic in the smug chuckle that comes from an opportunity to see themselves as urbane sophisticates.
Isn't that why people read the New Yorker?
This was the plot of a Seinfeld episode so I assume this is something upper middle class New Yorkers do?
My sister is asking fam who aren’t making it to her son’s graduation to make a congratulations video for her son. 🙄
Narr said...
SRSLY? People do this, and/or expect other people to do this?
Welcome to our narcissistic world! I sure they do. You have to remember every young woman out there these days its the first person who's ever done something like this! You must show proper deference to their uniqueness!
Althouse said...
Humor aside, what do we think of the ethics of resisting pressure to come see a baby.
There are none? I mean, seriously, you think it's reasonable to expect someone to spend hundreds to dollars to fly somewhere so they can watch your baby slobber and poop?! Hell, no! A picture will do just fine. And, FTR, I actually like babies.
Also, humor and The New Yorker parted company a long time ago.
A woman on pregnancy leave will visit the office with her newborn, and all the ladies will play pass-the-baby. Men are not invited to play.
========
proof of concept in demonstration
Althouse asks...
Why see a baby?
You never know, it may be your last chance before a dingo takes their baby.
@tcross said... "A woman on pregnancy leave will visit the office with her newborn, and all the ladies will play pass-the-baby. Men are not invited to play."
Well, they sometimes are, but it usually gets halted when the first guy goes out for the pass.
"....and now I understand
After waking enough times to think I see
The Holy Kiss that’s supposed to last eternity
Blow up in smoke, its destiny
Falls on strangers, travels free"
"I asked ChatGPT:"
Why?
"I mean, who doesn't love babies? "
While I do love babies, they are humans after all, I want nothing to do with them. They scare the hell out of me. Far too much responsibility. One wrong move and you're branded a baby-killer. For life.
I have worked with tens of thousands of kids from two-year-olds on up, and have always loved it, but get that baby away from me.
"In a perfect world airplanes would have a section for this just like they have business class or 1st class."
So it's just another "equity" issue?
“I will not board a plane for your baby....”
I won’t even do it for your puppy, and puppies are much cuter and more interesting than babies.
"Maybe the New Yorker has a different concept of "humor," from mine."
Wat? You don't find two cats snidely commenting about the board meeting they're attending funny?
No considered opinion about the baby thing, but it is my fervent wish that we keep AI out of conversations between humans.
"A woman on pregnancy leave will visit the office with her newborn, and all the ladies will play pass-the-baby. Men are not invited to play."
This is absolutely true.
"Funny how all leftists want somebody else to reduce the population. "
In their perfect world, the plane crashes.
"Funny how all leftists want somebody else to reduce the population. "
In their perfect world, the plane crashes.
I always get out of holding someone's new baby by saying "I feel a cold coming on. Don't want to make your baby sick."
If you ever built a deck, added a room or expanded a garden did you immediately invite people to fly across the country to see it? No. And while producing a baby is more important, significant and laborious, it's still asking too much to fly to see it. Unless it's in Vegas.
It's a humor piece. And, yes, over-involved families do make flights to admire the new-born. In some families it's considered a duty. I know a few of those families. More money than sense, natch.
Thinking about it some more, the you-must-go-see-baby families I commented on above also seem to make a practice of taking every man, woman, and child in the extended family on repeated trips to the Disney parks. It's weird. Not sure how the two impulses are related but I know multiple families that do both.
...Another way to put that is, in the presence of a baby, women feel pressure to demonstrate to themselves and others that they possess an attractive amount of warmth and empathy. Men are free to follow their actual interests...
Another way to put it is that nen are perverts who are not supposed to want to touch children.
What's with all the Malthus-bashing?
Being invited to see the baby is awkward. Refusing can damage a valuable friendship, perhaps ruin it, depending on the friend's sense of humor, so I go.
Now I'm there. Hold the baby, Quaestor, I'm commanded. This is terrifying. What if I drop it? It's not a football. Fumbling a neonate entails a costly penalty. I haven't checked the current rulebook, but it's loss of possession and half the distance to the goalline, maybe worse. I'll get benched for sure.
Now I hold the baby. Fortunately, it's not as heavy or as slipper as a watermelon, but just as intolerant of impact with the floor. Dare I ask, boy or girl? Anyone with a third option isn't worth my friendship, so I ask. Aha! Blue blanket. It's so light I hardly noticed. Trying to make conversation I ask, why do they use such a washed azure? Why not a blue that makes a statement, like Prussian blue? Nothing. Mommy and Daddy are too enthralled to think. Now, other than the cooing and the ah-ing, comes a graceless silence. I'm expected to say something about the baby. I'm expected to say how beautiful and cute he is. But he's neither. None are. Sorry, new mothers, but your womb produces little monstrosities. There's a chance, a slim one, that he will acquire beauty, or at least cuteness, in a matter of months. But right now... At best, he looks like Winston Churchill on a bender. Every white neonate, male or female, looks like the great PM after two or three bottles of bubbly. Black and Asian newborns less so, granting them a legup on the cuteness mount. So I say with a broad smile, he certainly looks healthy. There. Now I can surrender him to more welcoming arms.
But no! Feed the baby, Quaestor, I'm commanded. A threadlike pipette is attached to my pinky. The far end is attached to a plastic bag full of... no, no, please don't tell me... that stuff. Yes. It's that stuff. The bag is tucked under my arm to keep it warm, and my fourth finger is presented to Junior's tiny lips. Now I'm a captive until the mini-mutant is satisfied. Well, at least he can't bite.
No way am I getting on a plane to visit a friend just to meet her baby. That’s just ridiculous. I’d have no problem at all resisting that pressure. If it exists. This is news to me. But, then again, it was news to me that people wanted cash as a wedding gift to pay for their honeymoon. Now it’s a common request (one I also ignore).
I've yet to hear of anyone expecting or asking anyone else to fly, for the sole reason of visiting a newborn. People do it of their own free will though. Last Easter my wife and I flew to Chicago and then drove to Appleton Wisconsin to visit my niece's new daughter. Part of the motive, was that my sister and brother in law had driven there from Washington, so we got to see them too.
When a woman brings a baby into the office I want to hold it, because babies are delightful. Often, all the women get a turn--not so much for the men. It's not like I'll break the little thing, I successfully raised three of my own. I harbor the suspicion that I don't get a turn because most of the women harbor a bias, in their minds, they are a woman, they need this, I as a man, don't need it, I just want it.
A. In my large extended family, AFAIK, No One has been pressured to fly to see a newborn.
2. If you don't have children, I will ignore everything you say about the future. And most of what you say about the present.
"So it's just another "equity" issue?"
Insofar as currently, everyone must suffer equally. Life-hacking would be getting yourself a pair of those killer Bose noise-cancellers, but have you seen the prices...
Since Karin Jean-Pierre says that all the children are "ours", I don't have to travel to see your particular baby. I can just go see the new infant on the next block, and the job is done. Sarc.
When my granddaughter (and first grandchild) was born in London ten years ago, my wife and I made the trip from Los Angeles to London within two weeks of the birth. The young lady was laughing and smiling at two and a half weeks and hasn't stopped since. And KJP can keep her clammy mitts off the kid and her younger brother.
Also, flying on a plane to go see an acquaintance’s baby isn’t really a likely scenario, nor one I’ve ever heard of. More likely the pressure might be exerted by a very close friend, or a relative. In my experience most new parents don’t want people coming to see the new baby and bringing their germs and viruses with them, plus having to have a guest in the house when one is sleep deprived. This article’s whole scenario sounds contrived, probably to get the comedian some laughs.
"If you don't have children, I will ignore everything you say about the future."
The notion that a childless person can not care about the future of humanity is small-minded.
Wince wins this one.
Wince wins this one.
Other than helping new parents right after birth, why would I go see a baby? Makes no sense. \
I like my kids, other people's kids on a case by case basis.
For family, you go see the baby. You want to see the baby. We just invited our family to come stay with us for a week (babies and all). Next we're flying across country to see the other half in a couple of months (more kids, but not babies). it's family. We like it.
For friends? Meh. No. I'll see their kids if and when we happen to get together.
But...if you do go see you friend's baby, take a tip from Seinfeld and remember to say when asked, "That baby is breathtaking."
Humor is dead
"No, but thanks for asking."
Universal response to Jehovah's Witnesses, sellers of band candy and other bothersome offers.
I’d say this piece dovetails nicely w/the inability to regard a community(&society)as members of interest.
Exhibit A- Mr Neely &Mr Penny.
What Big Mike said at 10:02. I don’t have any experience with this kind of situation in my generation, other than grandchildren, in which case you would be very offended if you weren’t invited to come visit and see the baby right away. We are headed across the country shortly to be present (by insistent invitation) at the birth of our first grandchild. The little girl’s uncles will be there within several weeks after the birth, and one of the uncles will visit again in August, in all cases by making a trek from the east coast to the west coast. I have observed that my kids generation tends to make a big deal about inviting friends to come and visit after a new child is born, and they generally seem to keep track of each others’ kids as they grow. All of this is quite encouraging, given the horrible indoctrination that kids have received, to the effect that kids are to be avoided rather than treasured. It’s a question of what is valuable to you. When you have reached the point where babies are not valuable, or even interesting, you might want to check to see if your soul is missing.
Seeing a baby need not be boring. About all you can gift a baby with is clothing, or consumable items like diapers or food. I like to give babies their first taste of pureed beets, fresh from a Gerber's jar, as soon as they are old enough to toss a small jar of pureed beets across a room. The color of pureed beets makes for spectacular photos, to be cherished for decades.
For toddlers, an invitation to visit is a golden opportunity to present the wee bairn with toys that make electronic noises, like an electric keyboard or a loudspeaker. The value of this practice should never be dismissed, as kids that age love making noise for hour after hour. Only one sibling of mine was smart enough to let her toddler play with their new loudspeaker in the bathtub until it died. The toy, not the child.
For a 3 to 5 year old, however, never pass up the chance to give a kazoo, or a vuvuzela if the relationship you have with their parents is even less important to you. Alternately, a child's set of real tools, for working on the family furniture and/or pets, often passes parental scrutiny until the cherub gains some skill with the saw (or hammer, prybar, chisel, screws, etc.). I have a sister who still angrily points out a saw mark on the leg of their antique coffee table whenever I visit, and that particular nephew has been married for almost a decade now.
The key concept in the tract is: I'll call myself whatever I need to (i.e. Anti-Natalist), in order to get out of this presumptuous request.
As for soul talk, I just smile tolerantly and deny--if I think the hearer can bear the psychic pain--that either of us has one.
Original Mike,
Childless people can certainly care about the future of humanity. I simply don't care what there opinions are. To use the jargon of a few years ago, they are not STAKEHOLDERS in the future.
(And please don't bother me with "but what about Aunts and Uncles" or the like. I know all about genetics and altruism and blah blah.)
Igna: "Do you even know any real live people on the left that you aren’t trying to control with some legal action?"
The world through the leftist looking glass that projects but doesn't reflect.
No one should ever visit a baby that has less than 10,000 TikTok followers.
Why would anyone want an anti-natalist to come see a baby? I'd be concerned he/she/it might harm the child.
that part about Malthus shows the real agenda.
Ask Chatbot about how Malthus was one reason the Brits starved a million Irish during the potato famine.
https://www.acsh.org/news/2020/05/14/irish-potato-famine-how-belief-overpopulation-leads-human-evil-14792
… not that you can’t say no.
It’s the attitude/sentiment of the article that’s abrasive.
“"I asked ChatGPT:"
Why?“
Crueler neutrality?
"If you don't have children, I will ignore everything you say about the future. And most of what you say about the present."
Why?
In my experience, any man who intrudes into a game of pass-the-baby will be told that he's doing it wrong.
" Farmgirl. I’d say this piece dovetails nicely w/the inability to regard a community(&society)as members of interest."
With all respect, Yes, the community wins when breeding pairs create children. As a former breeder, I did it because it was socially expected. I would have been financially better off if I had no kids.
That is my gift to America.
>Fred Drinkwater said...
2. If you don't have children, I will ignore everything you say about the future. And most of what you say about the present.<
Well, that was certainly gratuitous. But go for it; I support your right to feel that way. As well as your right to broadcast your ignorance.
I know too many couples who should never have had babies.
“The world through the leftist looking glass that projects but doesn't reflect.”
The blinkered world of Trumpublicans, a very limited view.
"Childless people can certainly care about the future of humanity. I simply don't care what there opinions are. To use the jargon of a few years ago, they are not STAKEHOLDERS in the future."
I have a step daughter. Does that credential me into your clique of humans worthy of an opinion?
"If you have a friend that has had a baby, that becomes reason why you must visit when the truth is you'd prefer to see the friend without the baby as the centerpiece."
If your definition of friendship includes the friend only, and not all of their accoutrement, then you might not have many friends. Friends do come with spouses, families, babies, and all sorts of baggage. The article seems to be about unconditional love, and the extent you apply that to platonic relationships.
I understand on Facebook, not wanting to see endless pics of babies, and all the drivel that accompanies it in the captions, but that's online. In real-life relationships, sacrifices are made.
I don't like the idea one person off-loading possessions, problems, babies, or anything else on another, but the idea that someone is going to be injured just by going visiting occasionally ---seems extreme.
In my last teaching term, An unmarried 15 yr old brought in her baby to alternative school. All the female teachers went ga-ga over it. The girl was queen for a day. She was also pregnant again. She was one of my better students. And she was also the only one that cared enough about her grades to cheat.
Oh, and the step daughter has little step-children for me to dote over. Does it have to be my seed, or do they get me into your club?
My mother is heavy into genealogy. One thing you realize as you're listening to the recitations of the generations is that your seed is a spit in the ocean, Fred.
There are some people where I'd fly on a plane to watch them try to make a baby.
I am Laslo.
Did I say anything about your opinions, other than "I" don't care what they are?
Evidently childless-ness is correlated with an inability to read.
(As I did once as a panelist judging startup pitches: I apologize to our hostess if I am out of line at her salon.)
"Do you even know any real live people on the left that you aren’t trying to control with some legal action?"
I'm not sure there's anyone alive these day in the US who is being controlled legally by someone who seeks even more control.
The Chatter thingie did a very nice, thorough job of showing up the author of the article.
Maybe we do need more AI chat in this world… ‘til humans manipulate it. Or, is it already manipulated?
"What's with all the Malthus-bashing?"
Dude deserves it?
A photo of Malthus would be worth serious bucks, since he died in 1834. It would be like having an email from 1978.
Also, history and events have proven his economic theories wrong so conclusively that they ought to be as dead as he is. Alas.
Babies smell wonderful (except when they don't), and have eyes full of hope and wonder. Holding a baby is good for the soul.
"However, it's important to approach the situation with sensitivity and respect for your friend's feelings."
Which has nothing to do with "babies" and everything to do with friendship. Friends share.
Lay out the Anti-Malthus case, by all means.
Having ideas about demographic and economic matters that were mistaken, and failing to predict the Industrial Revolution, fall short of monsterhood in my book, but I'm just a historian, not a moralist.
Once again, ChatGPT shows its limitations and bias towards easily disproved liberal expectations. What does "showing respect" have to do with having a diversity of opinions? If I went up to an ultra Orthodox Jewish or practicing Muslim male and tried to shake his hand in a business setting, he would still recoil from me because their cultures dictate that non-familial females are unclean or sexually provocative. So in that case, diversity and respect (for or from me) are in direct conflict with each other.
This is beginning to sound like the Meghan Markle of technological insight.
Women are biologically programmed, in general, to be more responsive to the presence of babies, in general. Other than that, why be so pinched and over-sensitive to differences between female and male colleagues? I can't recall a workplace where only women reacted to some transient contact with the newborn of a colleague while men were either excluded or refused to offer a positive response. Unless the baby's (parent is being) disruptive, who are these nasty people?
Fred, I sincerely hope you and your offspring never need a cancer drug (or X-ray, or modern CT scan, or any other medical care) invented by a childless person, but do differentiate between there and their, lest good grammar disappear along with simple decency in your breviloquent version of the future.
Not everyone can have children. Should we just kill them now, lest they express an opinion?
In my family, I have the reputation of inspiring infants to vomit when I hold them. At any number of family gatherings, I've had Enfamil, Sililac and human breastmilk chundered onto my clothes (usually missing the burp towel I started wearing to hold infants, after my first few experiences). Only once was the technicolor rainbow my fault: I served an infant nephew the teeniest, tiniest of a sip of delicious, cold, bubbly champagne at a wedding reception, and then re-enacted the pyroclastic flow from Mt. St. Helens with him. Lesson learned. Alcohol and infants don't mix. Or they do, just with disastrous results.
"Evidently childless-ness is correlated with an inability to read."
I can read just fine. You think anything I might have to say is not worth your consideration because I haven't fathered a child, and therefore do not have a "stake" in the future.
What did I get wrong?
The Dennard Dale piece is funny; don’t take it too seriously, guys.
I’ll give you 3 to 2 odds that Dale hasn’t had a grandchild yet.
@mikee: Most babies look at me with suspicion, if not outright disapproval. Don’t know why.
"You think anything I might have to say is not worth your consideration because I haven't fathered a child, and therefore do not have a "stake" in the future."
Suppose one fathered a child that turned out to be gay. Still the end of the line for this branch of the tree, just one generation later. Does dad get credit for having a stake in the future, or not?
~swish swish~
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