"We also observed detainees standing on toilets in the cells to make room and gain breathing space, thus limiting access to the toilets."

"A cell with a maximum capacity of 12 held 76 detainees, another with a maximum capacity of eight held 41, and another with a maximum capacity of 35 held 155, according to the report. '[Customs and Border Protection] was struggling to maintain hygienic conditions in the holding cells. With limited access to showers and clean clothing, detainees were wearing soiled clothing for days or weeks... Corrective action is critical to the immediate health and safety needs of detainees, who cannot continue to be held in standing-room-only conditions for weeks until additional tents are constructed'..."

So says a report on a leaked forthcoming report by The Department of Homeland Security's Inspector General about an inspection of an El Paso Border Patrol facility. I'm reading that at ABC 10 News San Diego, but it says the report was obtained by CNN. I went to CNN.com to get their link, because I prefer the direct source, but multiple searches of the CNN front page make me think it is not there. And there are a lot of headlines on the CNN.com front page, and much of that stuff is inconsequential clickbait, such as "Jennifer Aniston's plane lost a tire, and somehow Jimmy Kimmel is involved" and...

Maybe that's a robot that laughs just like you, CNN, you creepy, quasi-human entity, but don't say I smile and frown like that. How about some serious coverage of this overcrowding? I watched a little of your TV channel yesterday, and I heard your newsfaces emitting sounds on the subject of Trump's tariffs (which I see as a desperate effort to shock Mexico into helping us with the border emergency) and they were going on about how price increases on goods from Mexico would cost us Americans some money — as if that's a human tragedy, avocados getting pricey. I watched Jake Tapper maintaining that frown he does so well. Does he frown just like Sophia?

I want to be fair, so I'm going to the transcript of yesterday's show, which I only watched out of the corner of my eye as I was trying to read. I remember noticing the style and mannerisms of the guest Robby Mook, which are very exaggerated and make him seem to be something from the uncanny valley. (By the way, the men's faces on Tapper's show are thickly slathered with opaque makeup, and I was commenting out loud that the men look like they are made of latex (and that was before I "met" Sophia the Robot).)

The transcript helps me avoid the distraction of the facial fakery. And I can see that there was, in fact, some talk of the inspector's report:

TAPPER: And there is a humanitarian crisis at the border. Let's show the pictures, these images that we got showing dangerous overcrowding at one of the Border Patrol centers in El Paso, Texas. They found the center which can hold up to 125 people holding 900 people earlier this month. So, Robby, the question would be, the devil's advocate question, why not try something? These, literally, thousands of migrants are crossing Mexico and Mexico's letting it happen because they're ultimately -- they're ultimately going to go into the United States. 

CNN political commentator David Urban inserts "They're aiding them in some instances" — that is, Mexico is helping the migrants come into our country — before the target of the question begins his answer. The question needed that boost if Mexico is not just "letting it happen" but actively abetting it.

Mook answers:

ROBBY MOOK, CNN POLITICAL COMMENTATOR: Well, first of all, you know, the administration had faced this before when Obama was president. And what they did was, they went to the root of the problem, which is violence in Central America, and really tried to fix that problem, rather than just a bunch of bluster at Mexico. The other thing to remember here...

URBAN: How'd that work?

MOOK: ... is these tariffs -- it actually worked. And the numbers went down. And these tariffs are on American importers of goods. This is a tax on the American people.

TAPPER: Right.

Mook and Tapper spot the exit door marked "Don't Tax Americans!"?

MOOK: So it doesn't actually make sense, logically. I think, sadly, because of the messed-up politics of the Republican base, this is a very powerful message. So that's why the president's doing this.

Huh? Enthusiasm for taxing Americans isn't a go-to Republican position and opposing taxing Americans isn't the usual position of Democrats, like Mook, so what is he saying doesn't "make sense, logically"? Notice that Mook didn't have one word of empathy for the migrants in the horribly overcrowded detention facility in El Paso. They're standing on the toilets, because it's the last place to stand in a cell, and how does anyone use the toilet? Mook — with this maddenly insouciant, callow expression on his face — just goes ahead and pitches the line it's all politics for President Trump.

MOOK: People think this is a way to create jobs by stopping people at the border, which nobody's ever proven that.

Is his unstated idea open borders? There's no overcrowding if you give up detaining people. I doubt that Democrats think open borders is "a very powerful message" for them, so I'm not surprised he doesn't come out and say that.

MOOK: I do think, though, you brought up the most important issue, which is this president has really bet a lot on this new trade deal.

No! Jake Tapper brought up the issue of overcrowding in the detention center. Mook is doing that stupid TV talk show thing of pretending he got asked the question he wants to answer.

MOOK: He has to have Democrats to help him with that. Why would any Democrat want to do anything to help the president's trade policy at this point?

Well, maybe, Robby, because real people are suffering in detention centers and Democrats don't want to advocate open borders and because they're afraid they'll be painted as inhumane and obstructionist.

MOOK: Because if you wake -- you just don't know what's going to happen. You might wake up tomorrow and he's put new tariffs in, after you just gave him some political equity to pass a trade bill. So, I think this is really dumb for him in terms of getting that passed and it's bad policy.

What? The tariffs are about pushing Mexico to help with the humanitarian crisis! Mook has switched the topic to trade deals (a political reason to refrain from using tariffs), and after some chatter on that subject, we get a video presentation on "how prices could rise for you on everything from cars to groceries to even iPhones."

TOM FOREMAN, CNN CORRESPONDENT (voice-over): More than a third of all vegetables bought in the U.S. wine, beer and snack foods too, more than a third of all televisions, nearly half of all air conditioners, machinery, medical tools and much more. Americans buy so much from Mexico, economists are warning a new tariff on Mexican goods could hit very hard, especially when it comes to cars....

That's the American idea of "hit very hard." Your new car is more expensive. Picture that. Stop thinking about the detained migrants standing on the toilets. Frown like a robot at the prospect of a higher-priced iPhone.

After the video presentation, Foreman says, "Well, it could very well be more than just a few cents for a piece of fruit. One analyst says, if it reaches the highest threatened level here, a 25 percent tariff on Mexican goods, that could mean the cost of a new car would rise, on average, $1,300. So, Jake, as they say, how do you like them apples?"

Get it? "More than just a few cents for a piece of fruit...  how do you like them apples?" Ha ha ha. Fruit... apples... get it?

Are you laughing like a robot yet?