Resisting the lure builds on itself and it becomes easier every day to leave the fake world behind. And FakeBook is definitely the fake world. Good for you. One day at a time.
I went from 780 "friends" to 40 friends in one epic day of de-friending. God that felt good. Next 50% de-friending in June. The de-friending included my entire family (siblings, cousins, etc.) other than my daughter. That felt even BETTER. Took the FB icon off my phone screen page. My life is much more peaceful. Fewer people living in my head and me in theirs. Now sometimes I forget about FB for days at a time. As I distance myself from it I'm thinking FB is kinda' creepy - all those people I barely knew lurking about me life.
I was following a personal policy of putting up an occasional minimal post about something concrete in my real-life surroundings, and some guy I barely knew in high school commented, "Get a life, post something that could possibly matter."
"Get a life, post something that could possibly matter."
Yeah, why get abused by strangers when you can be abused here by "friends."
I have website blockers on my browsers (LeechBlock on Firefox; can't remember what's on Chrome). You can set it for the Nuclear option which means you have to remove the add-on before you can go to the website.
I'm compulsively click on internet sites, so this has proved very helpful (I do research for my books, so I have to have access). I can tell those times when I'm really jonsing for feedly, too.
On my Asus netbook, I also have Window Edge. It's so crappy that it acts as its own webblocker.
I used to use my finance's FaceBook account to lurk, but never post. Most of her connections are with family, university and running pals.
OMG, Is it boring.
People post cute little quotations and take pictures of every vacation or restaurant meal. There are a few political statements, usually from a local journalist.
I suspect that FaceBook gives people a larger sense of community in a time efficient way. In other words, they don't have to take time out of busy schedules to call, email or meet up with individuals. They can broadcast their lives for all their connections to see.
I don't see anything wrong with that, but it has no appeal for me.
I've been doing this for the last 2 weeks. I haven't deleted my account, but I logged out, and every time in unthinkingly go back to facebook.com, I see that logged out page and remember I don't want to log back in. It's been highly successful.
Just read that Jim Carrey wants you to delete your account because Facebook helped the Russians. He deleted his. I read this under trending on Facebook.
"...and some guy I barely knew in high school commented, "Get a life, post something that could possibly matter."
My first and last experience with Facebook involved an older cousin, who had become a bitter alky, sending me a similar message. My brother said to me, "For all the people like that in our lives, we don't need a Facebook to reconnect, we need its opposite to erase their memory: an Assbook."
I gave it up during the election in 2016. I closed down the account. Of course it doesn't go away. One moment of weakness, log in just once, and it all comes back to life.
It's kind of like quitting cigarettes. One night you're in a hotel bar by yourself, out of town, bored, killing time before bedtime with a beer or two. You get the urge, buy a pack, light up. Next thing you know it's a month later and you're smoking every day. A year or two goes by and you decide you just have to quit. Then you go through it all again. Stay strong, professor.
One thing about that hs guy’s comment is what I dislike most on fb is all the efforts at mattering. I don’t want to see political stuff and promotions of charities and heroes. I think it’s best to be small and human sized and basically just say the equivalent of hi I’m still here now and then. When I’ve commented on other people’s post, where they’ve written about a Thing That Matters, I am usually regarded as someone failing to be nice enough, because people tend only to want to be assured that they are good. It’s not the right place for me.
Keep the streak alive Ann! You will be, and feel, better for it. I quit Twitter a year ago, it was liberating. I still have a FB account but rarely, if ever, go there. Even my kids - who are in their 30's with children - don't post there anymore. It ceased being of value to me, though I didn't realize that as clearly until I stopped going to the site and then discovered I didn't miss it.
LOL @ high school guy! Must have been your serving of his free floating hostility that day.
On the rare occasion that anyone posts something needlessly hostile on my Facebook account, I assume the person is in some kind of crisis or an alcoholic and delete it without saying anything.
Ah, here's another way I've unintentionally mirrored Althouse. (I met my husband, dated, and married him at basically the same time as Althouse and Meade. Our anniversaries may even be the same, but I don't feel like looking it up right now.)
A few days ago I noticed Facebook's relentless negativity was getting to me. People don't share interesting tidbits about their lives anymore. I used to enjoy FB because it let me get close with many of my far-flung cousins, but they're not sharing about their families anymore. Instead, my feed is all dominated by bad news: things we're doing wrong as a country, what's the matter with this church, here's how you're racist, here's a goFundMe account for somebody who's had something terrible happen to them, etc. etc. It's not like there aren't a lot of problems in the world, but should I really be inviting them all into my life? I was getting stressed out over people I didn't even know and problems that didn't relate to my life!
Anyway, I downloaded an extension for Chrome that allows me to block facebook, or to only allow a few minutes a day, and I've felt much better. I still have the habit -- sitting down to write this comment, I opened up a tab and hit facebook automatically, and had to redirect myself -- but I don't miss FB itself. All the good social sharing with friends and family continues on IG, without the oppressive screed-sharing or political arguments.
I'm not on Facebook but I understand the compulsive clickery. Any free moment I pulled my phone and look, here I am on your website. I'm trying to get control over that
The event announcements for my favorite hobby are all on FB, but I'm with you -- I hate it. I'd quit it in a second.
The worst is when a photo of Chief Dork, Mark Zuckerburg, shows up in my timeline in a FB ad. I tried flagging it as spam but they don't allow that option anymore.
On year 6 of no FB - I left when that Aussie cyber security expert figured out we never really log out of FB. Its a great way to find out who your TRUE friends are: the ones that will contact you via phone or your personal email.
Fucking LinkedIn is more of an annoyance in my life, another worthless site. Had an account once and deleted it when all it generated was spam emails. My job often requires that I look up an individual's professional details - and LinkedIn is always the destination. I am so sick of being told "just go to my LinkedIn account" - the constant assumption that anyone with a job (or alive and breathing) has a LinkedIn account.
Although my nephew is an officer of Facebook, I've never felt the urge to open an account. I find the Facebook and Twitter widgets that appear on every page a great annoyance and I generally delete any blogs that virtually force me to comment through them.
As a software engineer, however, I must applaud the policy of Facebook, apparently adhered to by Google, Microsoft and Apple, to eschew requiring drug screening of applicants for positions there. A person refusing to submit to drug screening as a condition of employment is in an impossible position. What we need is for someone to research and publish a list of evil companies that require drug screening so that we can avoid wasting our time applying for positions there.
Even physicians, for Chrissake, aren't generally subjected to drug screening! How can it be justified to require it of software engineers and Walmart greeters? cf. https://www.medscape.com/viewarticle/830211
Maybe a good time to give a plug for Diaspora the open-source, distributed, alternative to FB. After a long shaky start, it is a project with a very basic but stable foundation.
Most importantly if you like the idea even if the implementation is still a little basic for you, you can contribute bounty money to features to help it catch up with FB, paid out when they are implemented.
They have much more flexible editing/posting stuff already than FB and things can be linked and cross-posted to it. They are working on a number of features like being able to move your data between "pods" where they live (you can even run your own if you want to keep your data to yourself).
Just for the avoidance of your personal data and connections as a product they deserve support.
Stopped 99.9% of my reading and posting on Facebook about 2 years ago, mostly because I had a weird ultra-hostile response to something I'd posted that came from someone I thought was a harmless friendly acquaintance. I suddenly realized that this person was capable of reaching out directly to my workplace if she chose to do so--and based on the crazy malicious response she'd made to me, she seemed to possess the motivation. I do look at Facebook once per day just to see if my close friends or family has sent me a private message. I like knowing that this group of people has a way of contacting me easily.
My Facebook friends are a polyglot of high school classmates (One is virulently anti-Obama, still; others bemoan the Nazi in the White House), co-workers, people I met through my kids, and family. It's an interesting mix.
There are some I ignore, just like I ignore some Althouse posters. I could unfriend them, I guess, but that takes time.
You can quit Facebook cold turkey - just cancel your page and your account. Cold turkey works well for quitting cigarette smoking - just four days to purge the nicotine from your body. If you ain't got 'em - you can't smoke 'em.
Like on Instagram, I had a strict original content rule on FB. I probably would be still on it if others in my feed did. Instagram went political too. Don't need it.
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55 comments:
I know: Why don't you just delete your account?
I don't want to. I just want to cure myself of the compulsive clickery.
Resisting the lure builds on itself and it becomes easier every day to leave the fake world behind. And FakeBook is definitely the fake world. Good for you. One day at a time.
Whatever software came on my Windows XP from Dell produces a blank page for any facebook click, in addition to several other big social services.
I think of it as reducing virus vectors.
Resist!
Here, look at this picture of evangelist Mok Zuckabug. It'll help.
https://fortunedotcom.files.wordpress.com/2016/11/163292239.jpg
What is this "Facebook" of which you speak?
I went from 780 "friends" to 40 friends in one epic day of de-friending. God that felt good. Next 50% de-friending in June. The de-friending included my entire family (siblings, cousins, etc.) other than my daughter. That felt even BETTER. Took the FB icon off my phone screen page. My life is much more peaceful. Fewer people living in my head and me in theirs. Now sometimes I forget about FB for days at a time. As I distance myself from it I'm thinking FB is kinda' creepy - all those people I barely knew lurking about me life.
I've noticed that Facebook won't let me share news from conservative sites such as LifeZette and others.
Good for you, Ann. Keep it up!
I only go on Facebook for family stuff and a few close friends.
But some peeps live there.
So sad.
I first saw this post on Facebook. Weird!
Lean out!
I was following a personal policy of putting up an occasional minimal post about something concrete in my real-life surroundings, and some guy I barely knew in high school commented, "Get a life, post something that could possibly matter."
I think that was the last straw.
"Get a life, post something that could possibly matter."
LOL. Well, I would think you more than compensate for that here.
Facebook has become just more fake news.
Wow. Just wow. on the guy from hs.
I enjoy life without Facebook just as much as life without Hill as president.
"Get a life, post something that could possibly matter."
Yeah, why get abused by strangers when you can be abused here by "friends."
I have website blockers on my browsers (LeechBlock on Firefox; can't remember what's on Chrome). You can set it for the Nuclear option which means you have to remove the add-on before you can go to the website.
I'm compulsively click on internet sites, so this has proved very helpful (I do research for my books, so I have to have access). I can tell those times when I'm really jonsing for feedly, too.
On my Asus netbook, I also have Window Edge. It's so crappy that it acts as its own webblocker.
I used to use my finance's FaceBook account to lurk, but never post. Most of her connections are with family, university and running pals.
OMG, Is it boring.
People post cute little quotations and take pictures of every vacation or restaurant meal. There are a few political statements, usually from a local journalist.
I suspect that FaceBook gives people a larger sense of community in a time efficient way. In other words, they don't have to take time out of busy schedules to call, email or meet up with individuals. They can broadcast their lives for all their connections to see.
I don't see anything wrong with that, but it has no appeal for me.
Day 4153 of resisting the lure.
Facebook went wide 9-26-06. Actually an online device to calculate days between dates. Facebook six but internet cool.
Autocorrect sux too.
I've been doing this for the last 2 weeks. I haven't deleted my account, but I logged out, and every time in unthinkingly go back to facebook.com, I see that logged out page and remember I don't want to log back in. It's been highly successful.
I deleted my account (well before the election) and won't go there. Stay strong, Ann!
Your high school acquaintance demonstrates an unfulfilled need for a dedicated social media platform called Assbook.
I still have my account. i broke down yesterday after about 10 days with accessing.
I feel there should be a sponsor that when i feel week I can IM, ha!
As for Facebook, I stayed out on the ground floor.
Ann.
Get a life.
Delete your account!
:)
I said to hell with fecesbook - 10 years ago? Haven’t looked back. Never bothered with Twatter...
Although I don’t post on Gab, I really like the rude and racist jokes though ...
Just read that Jim Carrey wants you to delete your account because Facebook helped the Russians. He deleted his. I read this under trending on Facebook.
I’ve heard it said that avoidance is more effective than resistance.
"...and some guy I barely knew in high school commented, "Get a life, post something that could possibly matter."
My first and last experience with Facebook involved an older cousin, who had become a bitter alky, sending me a similar message. My brother said to me, "For all the people like that in our lives, we don't need a Facebook to reconnect, we need its opposite to erase their memory: an Assbook."
I gave it up during the election in 2016. I closed down the account. Of course it doesn't go away. One moment of weakness, log in just once, and it all comes back to life.
It's kind of like quitting cigarettes. One night you're in a hotel bar by yourself, out of town, bored, killing time before bedtime with a beer or two. You get the urge, buy a pack, light up. Next thing you know it's a month later and you're smoking every day. A year or two goes by and you decide you just have to quit. Then you go through it all again. Stay strong, professor.
One thing about that hs guy’s comment is what I dislike most on fb is all the efforts at mattering. I don’t want to see political stuff and promotions of charities and heroes. I think it’s best to be small and human sized and basically just say the equivalent of hi I’m still here now and then. When I’ve commented on other people’s post, where they’ve written about a Thing That Matters, I am usually regarded as someone failing to be nice enough, because people tend only to want to be assured that they are good. It’s not the right place for me.
Keep the streak alive Ann! You will be, and feel, better for it. I quit Twitter a year ago, it was liberating. I still have a FB account but rarely, if ever, go there. Even my kids - who are in their 30's with children - don't post there anymore. It ceased being of value to me, though I didn't realize that as clearly until I stopped going to the site and then discovered I didn't miss it.
-sw
"Day 2 of resisting clicking to Facebook."
You'll be shocked at what happened next...
What a great idea. I'll try it, starting tomorrow.
Day two? That's nothing. I've been resisting clicking on my Facebook account for almost 61 years.
LOL @ high school guy! Must have been your serving of his free floating hostility that day.
On the rare occasion that anyone posts something needlessly hostile on my Facebook account, I assume the person is in some kind of crisis or an alcoholic and delete it without saying anything.
Ah, here's another way I've unintentionally mirrored Althouse. (I met my husband, dated, and married him at basically the same time as Althouse and Meade. Our anniversaries may even be the same, but I don't feel like looking it up right now.)
A few days ago I noticed Facebook's relentless negativity was getting to me. People don't share interesting tidbits about their lives anymore. I used to enjoy FB because it let me get close with many of my far-flung cousins, but they're not sharing about their families anymore. Instead, my feed is all dominated by bad news: things we're doing wrong as a country, what's the matter with this church, here's how you're racist, here's a goFundMe account for somebody who's had something terrible happen to them, etc. etc. It's not like there aren't a lot of problems in the world, but should I really be inviting them all into my life? I was getting stressed out over people I didn't even know and problems that didn't relate to my life!
Anyway, I downloaded an extension for Chrome that allows me to block facebook, or to only allow a few minutes a day, and I've felt much better. I still have the habit -- sitting down to write this comment, I opened up a tab and hit facebook automatically, and had to redirect myself -- but I don't miss FB itself. All the good social sharing with friends and family continues on IG, without the oppressive screed-sharing or political arguments.
I'm not on Facebook but I understand the compulsive clickery. Any free moment I pulled my phone and look, here I am on your website. I'm trying to get control over that
The event announcements for my favorite hobby are all on FB, but I'm with you -- I hate it. I'd quit it in a second.
The worst is when a photo of Chief Dork, Mark Zuckerburg, shows up in my timeline in a FB ad. I tried flagging it as spam but they don't allow that option anymore.
Also, I'm sure it's high-school kids editing the "trending" news feeds.
On year 6 of no FB - I left when that Aussie cyber security expert figured out we never really log out of FB. Its a great way to find out who your TRUE friends are: the ones that will contact you via phone or your personal email.
Fucking LinkedIn is more of an annoyance in my life, another worthless site. Had an account once and deleted it when all it generated was spam emails. My job often requires that I look up an individual's professional details - and LinkedIn is always the destination. I am so sick of being told "just go to my LinkedIn account" - the constant assumption that anyone with a job (or alive and breathing) has a LinkedIn account.
Facebook for old people. Quit FB and live young.
Although my nephew is an officer of Facebook, I've never felt the urge to open an account. I find the Facebook and Twitter widgets that appear on every page a great annoyance and I generally delete any blogs that virtually force me to comment through them.
As a software engineer, however, I must applaud the policy of Facebook, apparently adhered to by Google, Microsoft and Apple, to eschew requiring drug screening of applicants for positions there. A person refusing to submit to drug screening as a condition of employment is in an impossible position. What we need is for someone to research and publish a list of evil companies that require drug screening so that we can avoid wasting our time applying for positions there.
Even physicians, for Chrissake, aren't generally subjected to drug screening! How can it be justified to require it of software engineers and Walmart greeters?
cf. https://www.medscape.com/viewarticle/830211
Maybe a good time to give a plug for
Diaspora the open-source, distributed, alternative to FB. After a long shaky start, it is a project with a very basic but stable foundation.
Most importantly if you like the idea even if the implementation is still a little basic for you, you can contribute bounty money to features to help it catch up with FB, paid out when they are implemented.
They have much more flexible editing/posting stuff already than FB and things can be linked and cross-posted to it. They are working on a number of features like being able to move your data between "pods" where they live (you can even run your own if you want to keep your data to yourself).
Just for the avoidance of your personal data and connections as a product they deserve support.
Stopped 99.9% of my reading and posting on Facebook about 2 years ago, mostly because I had a weird ultra-hostile response to something I'd posted that came from someone I thought was a harmless friendly acquaintance. I suddenly realized that this person was capable of reaching out directly to my workplace if she chose to do so--and based on the crazy malicious response she'd made to me, she seemed to possess the motivation. I do look at Facebook once per day just to see if my close friends or family has sent me a private message. I like knowing that this group of people has a way of contacting me easily.
Friday is FACEBOOK FREE for me.
What whitney said. Althouse is my clicking addiction.
My Facebook friends are a polyglot of high school classmates (One is virulently anti-Obama, still; others bemoan the Nazi in the White House), co-workers, people I met through my kids, and family. It's an interesting mix.
There are some I ignore, just like I ignore some Althouse posters. I could unfriend them, I guess, but that takes time.
You can quit Facebook cold turkey - just cancel your page and your account. Cold turkey works well for quitting cigarette smoking - just four days to purge the nicotine from your body. If you ain't got 'em - you can't smoke 'em.
Just remember, if you use a "free" service like Facebook, you are not a customer. You are the product.
I left and don't miss it. I like my friends better now.
I used to keep it for the possibility of a private message from friends or family, but every time the light was on, it was an ad.
Like on Instagram, I had a strict original content rule on FB. I probably would be still on it if others in my feed did. Instagram went political too. Don't need it.
If you don't have it already, Facebook Purity is a wonderful way of taking control over Facebook.
Facebook doesn't bother me, and I think it's a useful community board, but I don't see what most people see when they're on Facebook.
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