I've been a terrible parallel parker for decades. My brother noticed that several years ago and took five minutes to teach me how to do it. Then I was a good p-parker for about two days. Then I didn't have to do it again for maybe a year or so, and I got lousy again.
Parallel parking is a skill. It's not as complicated as learning to operate an elevator while on heroin, but it does take hand, eye, and foot coordination.
Once you get all that, it's like tying your shoe. Stays with you for life.
On a fishing trip to Canada, I recall my father parallel parking a car and trailer (with boat), without hesitation. Several townies came out of their retail establishments to observe, just shaking their heads.
My dad wouldn't let us get our licenses until we demonstrated to him the ability to parallel park even though it wasn't on our driving test. Also basic car maintenance and changing a tire. It all came in handy since we weren't well off and drove beater cars....more than once I used his trick of turning on the car heater to pull heat off the engine when it was overheating, in order to get to the nearest gas station. And in college my old Plymouth Valiant had a short in the electrical system that no one was able to find and fix, so in order to keep the battery from draining while the car was parked I had to pop the hood every time I arrived at a destination and disconnect the battery cable from the terminal.
Still, I'm a pretty lousy driver and fully admit I fit the female stereotype with regard to judging distances and reaction times.
Do we know if she used all her strength to crank the steering wheel while her foot was planted firmly on the brake pedal? That's the face-palm infraction.
If you put a bumper sticker on your car, you'd better drive and park in a way that serves the interest of your message. I mean, don't put "COEXIST" on your car and then tear around cutting people off like an asshole.
traditionalguy said... Parallel parking is an all male skill. And only a few of them learn it.
My wife can parallel park quite calmly and successfully. She also can back up a truck that is towing a trailer without turning the rig into a pretzel.
Right now her car is in the shop getting a new left front bumper. (Unfortunate encounter with our garage door last week. Go figure.
I don't criticize because I'm the guy who once backed my hatchback out of the garage with the hatch up. It opens up the whole top kind of like a sardine can, if you want to know.
Bumper stickers and other slogans are not allowed on our cars.
The asshole is the real test of your "coexist" bonafides. If you can accept me, and get the hell out of my passing lane, then you are truly a blessed soul of pure tolerance, and will sit at the right hand of God one day. I promise.
From personal experience, I've had at least 3 people with "Trump 2016" stickers cut me off, switch lanes without using their blinkers, and generally drive like assholes who think they own the road.
I hate bumper stickers. I don't understand why people feel the need to ruin their cars with them.
I belong to the "Let's Go Out and Gum Up Traffic Club." It is for retired people with bad eyesight who think the fast lane is safer if used at the legal speed limit. We also like to stop at four way stop sign intersections and wait until all of the others go first. That really screws up their minds.
We get awards for the number of birds shot at us. And there is a bonus if we keep your emergency flashers going for the whole trip.
Now that I think about it, at least she isn't parked 2 feet away from the curb. It's a two lane road, and if it's narrow, having an SUV parked far from the curb can be an issue... I live on a narrow street with street parking, and one of my pet peeves is people who don't park their cars close to the curb.
"From personal experience, I've had at least 3 people with "Trump 2016" stickers cut me off, switch lanes without using their blinkers, and generally drive like assholes who think they own the road."
Here in the Bay Area I've yet to see a Trump sticker. They're mostly Bernie with a smattering of "I'm Ready For Hillary" stickers that are always quite small...
The best one that got a hearty laugh out of me was "Bernie...Because Fuck This Shit".
I once wondered aloud to a coworker about a car in the company lot with a "Jesus Is Lord" sticker on one end of the bumper and "Question Authority " on the other. Then the look on his face made me say "It's your car, isn't it? And you did that on purpose didn't you?" I always did like that guy. Also, he was the first openly gay guy I knew well.
Once upon a time I worked for a company that, among other things, installed aluminum rain gutters. We had the contract to replace the old galvanized steel gutters for a large apartment community. Step 1 is to remove the old gutters, which I and others did one large building at a time. There was a large pile of old gutters laying in the grass. One Saturday early morning the boss dispatched me with our venerable and tough pickup truck and a 20-foot trailer to collect the old gutters and take them to the dump. You can be sure that the old lengths of gutter had plenty of sharp edges and were unwieldy. There was a narrow drive leading to the pile of old gutters, so in I drove. Loaded up the old gutters and used plenty of nylon twine to secure these to the pickup bed and trailer. Next step was to back down the drive and ease the trailer and truck between cars parked on the street. Achieved that without too much of a close call. 37 years later I'm still sweating just thinking about that task.
Related: I don't understand our current obsession with blurring license tags. They're meant to be publicly readable identifiers. Not private like an address or phone number. What am I missing?
Who pays for the tires on that car? Parallel parking is simply the control of the machine to not operate in areas it should not. There is no excuse to operate it so poorly and yet continue to operate it.
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44 comments:
Parallel parking is an all male skill. And only a few of them learn it.
Ask
Learn
Park!
What's wrong with that? Her car is not out in the street, and the curb doesn't care.
Time to identify as a man.
I've been a terrible parallel parker for decades. My brother noticed that several years ago and took five minutes to teach me how to do it. Then I was a good p-parker for about two days. Then I didn't have to do it again for maybe a year or so, and I got lousy again.
Parallel parking is a skill. It's not as complicated as learning to operate an elevator while on heroin, but it does take hand, eye, and foot coordination.
Once you get all that, it's like tying your shoe. Stays with you for life.
On a fishing trip to Canada, I recall my father parallel parking a car and trailer (with boat), without hesitation. Several townies came out of their retail establishments to observe, just shaking their heads.
A lasting memory for a snot-nose little kid.
Haha!!!
My dad wouldn't let us get our licenses until we demonstrated to him the ability to parallel park even though it wasn't on our driving test. Also basic car maintenance and changing a tire. It all came in handy since we weren't well off and drove beater cars....more than once I used his trick of turning on the car heater to pull heat off the engine when it was overheating, in order to get to the nearest gas station. And in college my old Plymouth Valiant had a short in the electrical system that no one was able to find and fix, so in order to keep the battery from draining while the car was parked I had to pop the hood every time I arrived at a destination and disconnect the battery cable from the terminal.
Still, I'm a pretty lousy driver and fully admit I fit the female stereotype with regard to judging distances and reaction times.
Do we know if she used all her strength to crank the steering wheel while her foot was planted firmly on the brake pedal? That's the face-palm infraction.
When I see stuff like this, my first thought, "It's funny. Maybe too funny. Maybe staged."
Out here in rurban 'Murica I haven't had to parallel park in years.
You assume a woman parked the car. Maybe it was a guy and that's why women matter.
Of course a woman parked it !
And remember to repeal the 19th amendment before the country is lost.
That's the hazard of the bumper sticker. People make assumptions about you.
If you put a bumper sticker on your car, you'd better drive and park in a way that serves the interest of your message. I mean, don't put "COEXIST" on your car and then tear around cutting people off like an asshole.
My personal favorite was a car with "Coexist" and another slamming conservatives with something about banjos.
traditionalguy said...
Parallel parking is an all male skill. And only a few of them learn it.
My wife can parallel park quite calmly and successfully. She also can back up a truck that is towing a trailer without turning the rig into a pretzel.
Right now her car is in the shop getting a new left front bumper. (Unfortunate encounter with our garage door last week. Go figure.
I don't criticize because I'm the guy who once backed my hatchback out of the garage with the hatch up. It opens up the whole top kind of like a sardine can, if you want to know.
Bumper stickers and other slogans are not allowed on our cars.
The asshole is the real test of your "coexist" bonafides. If you can accept me, and get the hell out of my passing lane, then you are truly a blessed soul of pure tolerance, and will sit at the right hand of God one day. I promise.
Better to go with a sticker that doesn't create high expectations.
For example:
'Honk if you've never seen an Uzi fired from a car window'
"My personal favorite was a car with "Coexist" and another slamming conservatives with something about banjos."
Mine is the car that had "Eating Meat Stops a Beating Heart" next to "I'm Pro-Choice!"
Don't be so freaking judgmental!! People should be allowed to park however and wherever they want.
Isn't it depressing when stereotypes are confirmed empirically?
A lot of women have trouble getting their rear-ends in the right position.
Is that an anal sex joke?
Could be. If you want it to.
Your call.
I am Laslo.
Maybe her teenage son borrowed her car.
From personal experience, I've had at least 3 people with "Trump 2016" stickers cut me off, switch lanes without using their blinkers, and generally drive like assholes who think they own the road.
I hate bumper stickers. I don't understand why people feel the need to ruin their cars with them.
Parked sideways to honor Prince?
I still have my Stand with Walker bumper sticker on my car.
" I don't understand why people feel the need to ruin their cars with them. "
The only Trump bumper sticker I have seen in Los Angeles was on a Tesla. I laughed and wished I had my iPhone camera ready.
I belong to the "Let's Go Out and Gum Up Traffic Club." It is for retired people with bad eyesight who think the fast lane is safer if used at the legal speed limit. We also like to stop at four way stop sign intersections and wait until all of the others go first. That really screws up their minds.
We get awards for the number of birds shot at us. And there is a bonus if we keep your emergency flashers going for the whole trip.
Don't even ask me about driving after dark.
Here in Spain everyone parallel parks pretty efficiently. Otherwise, you would seldom be able to park at all.
"The only Trump bumper sticker I have seen in Los Angeles was on a Tesla. I laughed and wished I had my iPhone camera ready."
Ha, nice. I'd like to talk to that guy. I'm sure we'd have spirited debate.
Now that I think about it, at least she isn't parked 2 feet away from the curb. It's a two lane road, and if it's narrow, having an SUV parked far from the curb can be an issue...
I live on a narrow street with street parking, and one of my pet peeves is people who don't park their cars close to the curb.
"From personal experience, I've had at least 3 people with "Trump 2016" stickers cut me off, switch lanes without using their blinkers, and generally drive like assholes who think they own the road."
Here in the Bay Area I've yet to see a Trump sticker. They're mostly Bernie with a smattering of "I'm Ready For Hillary" stickers that are always quite small...
The best one that got a hearty laugh out of me was "Bernie...Because Fuck This Shit".
Bumper stickers reduce resale value.
I once wondered aloud to a coworker about a car in the company lot with a "Jesus Is Lord" sticker on one end of the bumper and "Question Authority " on the other. Then the look on his face made me say "It's your car, isn't it? And you did that on purpose didn't you?"
I always did like that guy. Also, he was the first openly gay guy I knew well.
"If you put a bumper sticker on your car, you'd better drive and park in a way that serves the interest of your message."
Not at all, actually...we all have bad days, now and then.
Once upon a time I worked for a company that, among other things, installed aluminum rain gutters. We had the contract to replace the old galvanized steel gutters for a large apartment community. Step 1 is to remove the old gutters, which I and others did one large building at a time. There was a large pile of old gutters laying in the grass. One Saturday early morning the boss dispatched me with our venerable and tough pickup truck and a 20-foot trailer to collect the old gutters and take them to the dump. You can be sure that the old lengths of gutter had plenty of sharp edges and were unwieldy. There was a narrow drive leading to the pile of old gutters, so in I drove. Loaded up the old gutters and used plenty of nylon twine to secure these to the pickup bed and trailer. Next step was to back down the drive and ease the trailer and truck between cars parked on the street. Achieved that without too much of a close call. 37 years later I'm still sweating just thinking about that task.
As far as bumper stickers for women, I prefer the "Well-behaved women seldom make history." ones that I see now and then.
Related: I don't understand our current obsession with blurring license tags. They're meant to be publicly readable identifiers. Not private like an address or phone number. What am I missing?
That lady's car is just "leaning in." Stylishly aggressive.
I had a Jason And The Nasville Scorchers on my first Cadillac and a Beat Farmers sticker on my Red F-150.
I would never put a political message on a vehicle.
Who pays for the tires on that car? Parallel parking is simply the control of the machine to not operate in areas it should not. There is no excuse to operate it so poorly and yet continue to operate it.
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