"Why a mortician?"
"I liked the way that my uncle was dressed at his funeral. And if I’m a mortician when someone in my family passes away, then I can take care of their body. Also my science teacher went on the internet for me and found out that morticians make $54,000 a year."
२८ मे, २०१५
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Smart kid. In the African American community the Funeral Home owner is the richest and most respected man there is.
The cool thing about being a mortician is that young hot women die sometimes, too.
C'mon: if they wheeled in Taylor Swift's naked, if also dead, body -- and it wasn't like she was mangled in a horrific car accident or had her head blown off with a shotgun or anything* -- the thought of 'spending a little extra time' with her wouldn't cross your mind?
I mean, it doesn't have to be invasive or anything: you could just guide her through a hand-job with her delicate fingers and then ejaculate on her pert, if also dead, breasts.
*Regarding "...blew her head off with a shotgun or anything*: we know Taylor would never do such a thing to herself -- obviously -- but there are sometimes disgruntled ex-boyfriends. It was just an example, anyway: no need to think about it that much.
I am Laslo.
Also: dead women don't have a gag reflex.
Just an observation.
I am Laslo.
Laslo, I am starting to think you are a mortician.
Yes, a mortician in a black community should do well.
Damn it Laslo! Monitors cost money.
Laslo channels Paul Snider
"Here is a funny thing a kid said. I'm going to use it to say black people kill each other." Sheesh.
The death rate for white people, black people, and every other shade of people is the same: 100%.
I don't know why anyone would want to be a mortician. I grew up in a funeral home, helped out with funerals and never had a desire to go into the business. I wasn't a bit heartbroken when my parents sold the business a few years ago even though it was also my childhood home. It meant I no longer had to go there for holidays.
Basketball starts with "B" for "B"oring.
How is it not like watching a funeral procession but just going back and forth? At the end of each procession something gets dumped into a hole.
Start with the Knicks. Bury the entire franchise.
The NBA (and all sports leagues) can license (for an appropriate fee) the title of "The Official Mortician of the NBA".
It's a growth industry. The Baby Boomers are slated for demise next and there are a lot of us. My casket stocks have been doing very well lately and there's still room for growth. Smart young man - and I think $54K per anum is a little on the low side.
Addendum - Every year when I was an inner city school teacher I would have my "Your Chances of Making the NBA" lecture. EVERY young man sitting in my class KNEW they were going to make it to the NBA - with their personal skill set with that round ball they were a lock on getting drafted. So the "talk". How many college players are there I would ask. They had no clue so we set an arbitrary number of college players at 10,000. How many of that number get drafted by the NBA each year was the next question. No clue. Blank looks from the the young men. I put another arbitrary number of college draftees at 300. Next question - How many of that 300 made the team after roster cuts? 50? In that case if you like basketball get a college degree in Phys Ed and be a coach with your own team. My favorite caveat was "LeCharles. You think you can handle all this big ol' ugly white boys from Europe? They can play some ball and they will hammer your black ass all over the paint son". That got them laughing and nodding.
Thanks for calling that out Freeman.
You could be a mortician for FIFA. In Qatar they are generating a lot of work.
I'll never forget the kid in my high school class who announced "I want to be a lawyer - and a running back." He was third string RB on the JV squad at the time. Never heard if the lawyer thing worked out.
$54k/year for mortician?
Not in CA.
#2 daughter was in mortuary science course when she did research that showed pay at $15/hour
A lot different than when my grandfather was a mortician & later an memorial counselor at Forest Lawn ... he raised a couple of kids, nice home, college, etc, on his salary.
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