Althouse: "How a human being could have attempted such a book as the present without committing suicide before he had finished a dozen chapters, is a mystery.

April 29, 2015

"How a human being could have attempted such a book as the present without committing suicide before he had finished a dozen chapters, is a mystery.

"It is a compound of vulgar depravity and unnatural horrors."

21 comments:

Jaq said...: :^); 4/29/15, 8:42 AM
Brando said...: Reviews like that only make me want to read it more! The best reviews are the ones that try to pan, but intrigue you enough that you need to check it out for itself.; 4/29/15, 8:43 AM
Hunter said...: The quote made me think of Infinite Jest.

I don't mean that in a bad way.; 4/29/15, 8:47 AM
Hunter said...: Also, requisite link to my favorite adaptation of Wuthering Heights.; 4/29/15, 8:49 AM
Laslo Spatula said...: Heathcliff stood near the entrance, in his shirt, absent of trousers; with a candle dripping over his erect penis, and his face as white as the wall behind him. The first creak of the oak startled him like an electric shock: the light leaped from his hold to a distance of some feet, and his agitation was so extreme, that he could hardly maintain the stiffness of his manhood.

‘It is only your guest, sir,’ I called out, desirous to spare him the humiliation of exposing his detumescence further. ‘I had the misfortune to scream in my sleep, owing to a frightful nightmare about being anally ravaged. I’m sorry I disturbed you.’

‘Oh, God confound you, Mr. Lockwood! I wish you were at the—’ commenced my host, setting the candle on a chair, because he found it impossible to hold it steady. ‘And who showed you up to this room?’ he continued, crushing his nails into his testicles, and grinding his teeth to subdue the maxillary convulsions. ‘Who was it? I’ve a good mind to have anal sex with them this moment.’

‘It was your servant Zillah,’ I replied, flinging myself naked on to the floor, exposing my pale buttocks. ‘I should not care if you did, Mr. Heathcliff; she richly deserves it in the posterior. I suppose that she wanted to get another proof that the place was haunted, at my expense. Well, it is—swarming with ass-ghosts and ass-goblins! You have reason in shutting it up, I assure you. No one will thank you for a doze in such a den of anal depravity!’

‘What do you mean?’ asked Heathcliff, ‘and what are you doing? Lie down and let us finish out the night anally, since you are here; but, for Heaven’s sake! don’t repeat that horrid noise: nothing could excuse it, unless you were having your throat cut or your bowels reamed!"

I am Laslo.; 4/29/15, 9:05 AM
Hammond X. Gritzkofe said...: Paused at #8 in the linked article finding the phrase
'... she blamed the wild nature of the novel on Emily’s rural upbringing in Yorkshire, painting her as a "nursling of the moors."'

"Blamed?" Rather an ungenerous choice of word. How about "attributed?" Was that from Charlotte or Ms. Lanzendorfer?

Saying comes to mind: "One should not criticize a giraffe for having a long neck." (Recall proded by the photo above the quote?); 4/29/15, 9:14 AM
Wince said...: 10 Things You May Not Know About 'Wuthering Heights'

1. EMILY BRONTË GREW UP ON THE MOORS.

Wasn't that the MOOPS?; 4/29/15, 9:17 AM
m stone said...: I like to think that Emily died, not thinking the book was a failure, but believing that it had great value and would be recognized--read--after she was gone. Certainly in the throes of TB, she knew her life would be short.

Writers believe that sentiment. She would not be the first to prove it.; 4/29/15, 9:29 AM
Rusty said...: Yeah. Yea. Shit girls read. Got it.; 4/29/15, 9:41 AM
Laslo Spatula said...: "vulgar depravity and unnatural horrors" are what get me through the day.

Call me a dreamer, but I'm not the only one.

I am Laslo.; 4/29/15, 9:49 AM
Laslo Spatula said...: 'Charlotte awoke, unsure of her surroundings, naked, with a cucumber inserted in her ass.'

I just have to figure where to go from there and my novel will be finished.

I am Laslo.; 4/29/15, 9:52 AM
William said...: The Bronte sisters had the mortality rate of a Marine platoon on Iwo Jima. I've read about a half dozen of their books. Downers all. What terrible lives people, especially women, led in the 19th century. And the Bronte family was comparitively privileged. There were probably darker tales to be told of how people worked out their destiny on the moors, but this will do.; 4/29/15, 10:23 AM
Rusty said...: William said...
The Bronte sisters had the mortality rate of a Marine platoon on Iwo Jima. I've read about a half dozen of their books. Downers all. What terrible lives people, especially women, led in the 19th century. And the Bronte family was comparitively privileged. There were probably darker tales to be told of how people worked out their destiny on the moors, but this will do.

My late step fathers Yorkshire childhood had been kindly described as Dickensian.; 4/29/15, 10:36 AM
Stoutcat said...: Rusty said...
My late step fathers Yorkshire childhood had been kindly described as Dickensian.

House! You were lucky to live in a house! We used to live in one room, all twenty-six of us, no furniture, 'alf the floor was missing, and we were all 'uddled together in one corner for fear of falling.; 4/29/15, 10:50 AM
Etienne said...: Best God damned book ever written in the English language.

Pat Benatar rocked with the Kate Bush lyrics.; 4/29/15, 11:55 AM
Etienne said...: This comment has been removed by the author.; 4/29/15, 12:21 PM
Etienne said...: This comment has been removed by the author.; 4/29/15, 12:24 PM
MadisonMan said...: @Hunter at 0849, that's exactly what I thought of too!; 4/29/15, 1:01 PM
Sam L. said...: My favorite version is the Python's Wuthering Heights In Morse Code.; 4/29/15, 1:27 PM
Foose said...: Semaphore, actually ...; 4/29/15, 9:45 PM
Rusty said...: Stoutcat said...
Rusty said...
My late step fathers Yorkshire childhood had been kindly described as Dickensian.

House! You were lucky to live in a house! We used to live in one room, all twenty-six of us, no furniture, 'alf the floor was missing, and we were all 'uddled together in one corner for fear of falling.

When his father was judged mentally incompetent his mother, a domestic in Boston, sent him at age six to live in a one room cottage with his maternal grandfather in Yorkshire. His grandfather was a drunk and when the dole ran out in the middle of the month so did what little food was in the house. Consequently he spent a lot of his time sheming of ways to get food.; 4/30/15, 6:19 AM