No. No. No. A lot of Minnesotans hate the Packers, but not Wisconsin. How could they? It's a whole lot like Minnesota.
On the other hand, watch the video and you'll see why Franken is so far behind in the polls. Regardless of his politics, listening to him is just insufferable.
Franken's just doing what politicians do; pandering for votes. And what better way to get Minnesotans to vote for him? Well done, Al. I surrender to you.
I mean Hillary did it in New York. You don't have to live there to run. Plus Brett has to get out of Green Bay. Because when the money was on the line, he lost to THE WORLD CHAMPION NEW YORK GIANTS!
Did I mention to you lately that the Giants won the Super Bowl.
Minnesota has over 10,000 lakes and Wisconsin has only 8,000 some lakes.
Wisconsin actually has more lakes than Minnesota, and we don't even brag about it. We don't brag about our over-abundance of whiny hall of fame quarterbacks either.
Just a little inter-state rivalry there. No big deal. Texas rag on Oklahoma and Arkansas, too. (Which hurts me deep inside sometimes given that I was born in OK City... :))
Now, his ability to hand-draw the US map? That's pretty impressive.
I live in Minnesota, the land of 10,00 taxes, where everything is forbidden, where Mondale was considered a centrist, where untalented and physically repulsive men with hair splaying akimbo command a great fee telling Reader's Digest jokes on the State radio channel, where former wrestlers come for their chance at electoral fame, where bland is considered 'too spicy', where mediocrity is its own reward.
I'm not making this up: Our town paid a consultant $100,000 to come up with a new theme (So towns need a theme? The hell you say.) It came up with ...wait for it... Rah Rah Rochester. 100. Thousand. Dollars.
Oh, the humanity.
P.S. How do you separate the men from the boys in Wisconsin? With a crowbar. I gotta million of 'em.
Best McDonalds in the world is in Fairhope, Minnesota. Clean, courteous service, free refills on the coffee and free dirty looks from the retired farmers as well.
As Favre met with head coach Mike McCarthy and GM Ted Thompson late Monday, the sides were moving toward an agreement to end this circus, but uncertainty remained about what that agreement ultimately will be.
Favre and the team continued to hold the same viewpoints they've held for weeks but rather than continuing their stalemate, they have joined in pursuit of a mutually agreeable solution. Whether that solution will entail a trade, a release or another option was not determined in the meeting.
Favre, however, stood to his long-standing desire to stay within the division. But the Packers were still hoping to find another option.
Favre confirmed as much to ESPN's Chris Mortensen Tuesday, saying that the two sides were at a "stalemate" and that he believed the "best thing for this team is for us to call it a day. I could never show my face on the frozen tundra before the Packer fans when I played like a little bitch in the championship game which we lost to THE WORLD CHAMPION NEW YORK GIANTS."
Head Coach McCarthy also chimed in by saying "Did I tell you lately that the Giants won the Super Bowl. We can lose without Farve, after all we lost with him."
The only state insult I've heard of in real life was from a former NY co-worker, who reported that he had passed a particularly slowly driving woman in NJ on the right shoulder, and she stopped beside him at the next red light.
``This isn't New York, you know. I have a baby in here,'' she told him.
The co-worker emailed me later to ask what choice insult he should have used in response, thinking I would know, for some reason.
I in turn forwarded the question to the master of quick insults, F.T.Grampp. Grampp instantly responded cc all, ``Maybe if you'd moved a little faster, you wouldn't have had the baby.''
Just a snippet of real life, to remember that it differs from the words of comedians and audiences.
The web site I posted actually says, I'm not making this up: "Don’t be afraid tell your family, friends, business associates — everyone — that Rochester is a great place to raise a family, hold a reunion or even a convention."
Great. Don't be afraid! We don't bite ...much. What a great tagline.
Didn't Blue Oyster Cult do a song called 'Don't Fear the Rochester'?
But Wisconsin sucks and North Dakota blows works as well.
The wind comes from the North West and when it really blows in the winter Minnesota ends up with Dakota's top-soil.
Not that it isn't a stupid joke not funny past high school but it's one everyone has heard and it's not entirely random. I mean... if you wanted to prove you *weren't* a true Minnesotan you'd say that the Dakotas suck and Wisconsin blows, while everyone knows it's the other way around.
"I left Minnesota for Wisconsin in 1973. Best thing I ever did. There are no community organizers where I live. WI has a lot more lakes than MN."
And I'm sure nobody misses you in Minnesota, either.
At least people in Minnesota have a sense of identity not tied to a sports team or drinking. Then again, I can see why people in Wisconsin drink, having lived here for a few years.
"I live in Minnesota, the land of 10,00 taxes, where everything is forbidden, where Mondale was considered a centrist, where untalented and physically repulsive men..."
OK, I stopped reading there.
Let's see, physically repulsive men...hmmm, that rings a bell.
Like the other day, when the guy wearing that smelly, dirting looking green and gold jersey that looks like it hadn't been washed in a year with his scraggly facial hair took 4 minutes and the aid of a ramp to get off the bus.
Why? Because he must have weighed about 395 pounds, and he was eating at the time! Oh, but he an anomaly, right? No one else in this state is like that, right?
Hah!
I should keep a tally of all the fat, smelly, ugly men(and a few women) I see in Wisconsin. Of course, I would have to do nothing else, because it would take 8 hours, 7 days a week to keep track of them all!
Ever hear of a diet not involving brats, cheese, and beer?
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63 comments:
No. No. No. A lot of Minnesotans hate the Packers, but not Wisconsin. How could they? It's a whole lot like Minnesota.
On the other hand, watch the video and you'll see why Franken is so far behind in the polls. Regardless of his politics, listening to him is just insufferable.
where insulting Wisconsin is considered hilarious.
Oh c'mon. You wear cheese on your heads and talk funny. Yous guys are asking for it.
It's a whole lot like Minnesota.
Especially the funny accents.
Just a joke I heard growing up in Wisconsin:
Q: Why doesn't Wisconsin fall into Lake Michigan?
A: Minnesota sucks.
"insulting Wisconsin is considered hilarious"
Oh, that just means Minnesota has a crush on Wisconsin.
Hoosier Daddy said...
Especially the funny accents.
awww, geez
Franken is a comedian? Maybe 25 years ago, but for as long as I can remember he's primarily associated with being a first-class douchebag.
Franken's just doing what politicians do; pandering for votes. And what better way to get Minnesotans to vote for him? Well done, Al. I surrender to you.
Gotta say, I'm impressed with his extemporaneous map drawing.
Per Urban Dictionary:
Minnesota
the land of 3 seasons, winter, summer, and road construction
You can't tell the difference between Wisconsin and Minnesota accents, Hoosier? Your new name is: Tin Ear.
He started the joke by saying You know why Minnesota's so windy?
Because the Dakotas blow and Wisonsin ...[audience] sucks!
Ha ha ha.
So he insults a few more states along the way.
And then there's the poor schlub who had to hold the paper up.
He was nice to the little boy at the end, so he's got the 5 year old's vote down handily.
Seriously, though, this is the Democratic candidate for Senator of Minnesota.
I kid you not.
No joke.
Why so serious?
Always a bridesmaid, never a bride as I like to remind the Mud Ducks to our West.
Maybe Brett Farve can run for senator in Minnesoota. Hee hee.
Not funny, Troop.
I mean Hillary did it in New York.
You don't have to live there to run. Plus Brett has to get out of Green Bay. Because when the money was on the line, he lost to THE WORLD CHAMPION NEW YORK GIANTS!
Did I mention to you lately that the Giants won the Super Bowl.
Q: How many elephants does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: Minnesota sucks.
Al Franken = Very Not Funny
His bitter attitude stems from the unfulfilled desire to be a "big cheese", hence the pathetic associative humor.
pot meet kettle
I bet you Al Franken knows where the Leaning Tower of Pisa is at.
In Jesse Ventura's underpants!
As someone orignally from Wisconsin I definitely agree Minnesota is better than Wisconsin.
But Indiana is worse than both.
Actually, the entire midwest, with the exception of Chicago is pretty lame.
A beach is not on a lake-only on an ocean is the beach the beach.
Wisconsin has no Niemies or Saks-I think Minneapolis does-
But nowhere is worse than Mississippi. Well, maybe Alabama.
Minnesota has over 10,000 lakes and Wisconsin has only 8,000 some lakes.
Mississippi has no Whole Foods-could you imagine?
Brilliant move by Franken. He will overwhelmingly win the sports following 14 to 20 year old voters.
Also, with no Niemies or Saks where would anyone purchase their Kiehl products.
I couldn't imagine.
Minnesota has over 10,000 lakes and Wisconsin has only 8,000 some lakes.
Wisconsin actually has more lakes than Minnesota, and we don't even brag about it. We don't brag about our over-abundance of whiny hall of fame quarterbacks either.
"We don't brag about our over-abundance of whiny hall of fame quarterbacks either."
Well to be fair, he can complain that it was unfair that he had to play the WORLD CHAMPION NEW YORK GIANTS.
Did I tell you lately that the Giants won the Super Bowl?
Just a little inter-state rivalry there. No big deal. Texas rag on Oklahoma and Arkansas, too. (Which hurts me deep inside sometimes given that I was born in OK City... :))
Now, his ability to hand-draw the US map? That's pretty impressive.
I live in Minnesota, the land of 10,00 taxes, where everything is forbidden, where Mondale was considered a centrist, where untalented and physically repulsive men with hair splaying akimbo command a great fee telling Reader's Digest jokes on the State radio channel, where former wrestlers come for their chance at electoral fame, where bland is considered 'too spicy', where mediocrity is its own reward.
I'm not making this up:
Our town paid a consultant $100,000 to come up with a new theme (So towns need a theme? The hell you say.) It came up with ...wait for it...
Rah Rah Rochester.
100. Thousand. Dollars.
Oh, the humanity.
P.S. How do you separate the men from the boys in Wisconsin?
With a crowbar.
I gotta million of 'em.
I left Minnesota for Wisconsin in 1973. Best thing I ever did. There are no community organizers where I live. WI has a lot more lakes than MN.
One complaint: Brett, WTF?
Best McDonalds in the world is in Fairhope, Minnesota. Clean, courteous service, free refills on the coffee and free dirty looks from the retired farmers as well.
Oops, I meant Fairmont. Got it confused with Fairhope, Alabama where I got dirty looks from retired good ol' boys.
Quite true, ricpic.
There's no hope in Minnesota.
Rah Rah Rochester?
Sounds like a bad stu-stu-stutter, or something Charles Schulz might've done with the Jack Benny program.
Fox Sports August 5, 2008
by Jay Galzer
As Favre met with head coach Mike McCarthy and GM Ted Thompson late Monday, the sides were moving toward an agreement to end this circus, but uncertainty remained about what that agreement ultimately will be.
Favre and the team continued to hold the same viewpoints they've held for weeks but rather than continuing their stalemate, they have joined in pursuit of a mutually agreeable solution. Whether that solution will entail a trade, a release or another option was not determined in the meeting.
Favre, however, stood to his long-standing desire to stay within the division. But the Packers were still hoping to find another option.
Favre confirmed as much to ESPN's Chris Mortensen Tuesday, saying that the two sides were at a "stalemate" and that he believed the "best thing for this team is for us to call it a day. I could never show my face on the frozen tundra before the Packer fans when I played like a little bitch in the championship game which we lost to THE WORLD CHAMPION NEW YORK GIANTS."
Head Coach McCarthy also chimed in by saying "Did I tell you lately that the Giants won the Super Bowl. We can lose without Farve, after all we lost with him."
re: lakes, per Wisconsinology , and the winner isssssss......
This is all just transplanted humor from the Old Country.
Q: What does Norway have that Sweden doesn't?
A: Good neighbors.
Yeah but Sweden has those sweaters with the reindeer on them. And herring.
I hate herring.
Al Franken says ...
Rude words are very hurtful. Stewart Smalley ought to know that.
Everybody knows Illinois sucks.
Everybody knows Illinois sucks.
Everyone can band together in their hatred of the FIBS.
The only state insult I've heard of in real life was from a former NY co-worker, who reported that he had passed a particularly slowly driving woman in NJ on the right shoulder, and she stopped beside him at the next red light.
``This isn't New York, you know. I have a baby in here,'' she told him.
The co-worker emailed me later to ask what choice insult he should have used in response, thinking I would know, for some reason.
I in turn forwarded the question to the master of quick insults, F.T.Grampp. Grampp instantly responded cc all, ``Maybe if you'd moved a little faster, you wouldn't have had the baby.''
Just a snippet of real life, to remember that it differs from the words of comedians and audiences.
Or the right berm, as we'd say in Ohio.
Here's a state line crossing joke.
Why did RH Hardin cross the road over to Ohio?
He had a chicken stuck to his dick.
Oh, big deal.
Me? I'm stuck in Rah Rah Rochester.
The web site I posted actually says, I'm not making this up:
"Don’t be afraid tell your family, friends, business associates — everyone — that Rochester is a great place to raise a family, hold a reunion or even a convention."
Great.
Don't be afraid!
We don't bite ...much.
What a great tagline.
Didn't Blue Oyster Cult do a song called 'Don't Fear the Rochester'?
Everyone can band together in their hatred of the FIBS.
If it weren't for the money that the FIBS spend in Cheeseland - the state (Cheeseland) might just go broke.
OTOH - as an Illinois resident - Illinois does suck. Chicago keeps dragging it down...
If it weren't for the money that the FIBS spend in Cheeseland - the state (Cheeseland) might just go broke.
I didn't say we disliked the money you spend. We just dislike your presence.
Wait--
There are other states?
Dude! I thought Wisconsin was a neighborhood in Riverside!
States that aren't on the ocean seem just so passe.
I need to see the ocean.
Although, I have heard North Dakota is lovely this time of year.
Garrison Keillor is the Al Franken of people who have lived in Minnesota for a long time.
Mississippi has no Whole Foods-could you imagine?
Quelle horreur! Where do Mississippians buy their arugula?
Dog on sit-stay watches salad-seeking Ohio bunny.
Supermarket stresses local freshness of produce.
Who remembers the e coli warnings posted a month ago.
Poisoned food news turns to concern for your health turns to don't worry about the food, the three stages of public relations.
I'd always heard it, Iowa sucks and Canada blows.
But Wisconsin sucks and North Dakota blows works as well.
The wind comes from the North West and when it really blows in the winter Minnesota ends up with Dakota's top-soil.
Not that it isn't a stupid joke not funny past high school but it's one everyone has heard and it's not entirely random. I mean... if you wanted to prove you *weren't* a true Minnesotan you'd say that the Dakotas suck and Wisconsin blows, while everyone knows it's the other way around.
where insulting Wisconsin is considered hilarious.
It's hilarious if the comedian is Al Franken, who can't do any better than mock another cold climate state.
You know who also says, "Wisconsin sucks"?
Brett Favre.
This just in....Wisconsin says Al Franken sucks.
Most of the free world agrees.
Pogo said...
I live in Minnesota, the land of 10,00 taxes, where everything is forbidden,
You should try living in the United Socialist Soviet Republic of Chicago. Only China may be worse.
Did Trooper happen to mention that the NY Giants won the Super Bowl?
Pogo said...
Quite true, ricpic.
There's no hope in Minnesota.
Gotta get Obama up there to deal in some of that Hopium.
Lileks lives in Minneapolis, but so does Keillor (well, at least he used to, so I guess they balance each other out.
I think that Keillor lives in northwest Wisconsin (unfortunately).
Lol. That was a good one. ;-) How wide of a road was it, Trooper?
"I left Minnesota for Wisconsin in 1973. Best thing I ever did. There are no community organizers where I live. WI has a lot more lakes than MN."
And I'm sure nobody misses you in Minnesota, either.
At least people in Minnesota have a sense of identity not tied to a sports team or drinking. Then again, I can see why people in Wisconsin drink, having lived here for a few years.
*sigh* I'd settle for Rah-Rah-Rochester any day.
"I live in Minnesota, the land of 10,00 taxes, where everything is forbidden, where Mondale was considered a centrist, where untalented and physically repulsive men..."
OK, I stopped reading there.
Let's see, physically repulsive men...hmmm, that rings a bell.
Like the other day, when the guy wearing that smelly, dirting looking green and gold jersey that looks like it hadn't been washed in a year with his scraggly facial hair took 4 minutes and the aid of a ramp to get off the bus.
Why? Because he must have weighed about 395 pounds, and he was eating at the time! Oh, but he an anomaly, right? No one else in this state is like that, right?
Hah!
I should keep a tally of all the fat, smelly, ugly men(and a few women) I see in Wisconsin. Of course, I would have to do nothing else, because it would take 8 hours, 7 days a week to keep track of them all!
Ever hear of a diet not involving brats, cheese, and beer?
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