February 2, 2007

"One of the most disgusting, foul things I've seen -- by any illiterate retard -- in a long time."

That's Lou Reed's description of the script for "Factory Girl." (Pathetic typo: "Faculty Girl.") From a Slate article about the (apparently) crappy movie about Edie Sedgwick, Andy Warhol, and The Musician Everyone Knows Is Bob Dylan.

Language stuff: 1. Are decent people allowed to use the word "retard" like that? 2. If you say "[o]ne of the most disgusting, foul things I've seen -- by any illiterate retard," aren't you really creating a tiny category of things written by "illiterate retards" and thus totally undercutting the force of your insult? You've left out all the disgusting, foul things written by anyone who is either literate or not retarded.

Sex stuff: They're trying to get attention for this struggling movie with the rumor that Hayden Christensen and Sienna Miller have unsimulated sexual intercourse in the big sex scene. This has worked to get some publicity, and it might bring a few more people to the theater, but I'm wondering why anyone cares and -- I assume we do care -- wouldn't it be a distraction to be thinking about that while trying to watch the movie? You want to be inside the scene, believing you're watching Dylan and Edie, not thinking about what Hayden and Sienna are up to.

16 comments:

Bruce Hayden said...

What is scary is that the next time that a movie like this stinks, they are going to try something even worse than the actual sex thing.

Realistically, I find it somewhat problematic that they would get so carried away with all those people standing around right next to them that they would dispense with the body socks or whatever and really have sex. I know that movie actors/actresses are a bit into themselves, but really. Are these two that bad?

Bissage said...

ERROR CODE = BX-xluoi7

Ugh!!!

Bissage said...

I’d never heard of Sienna Miller so I did an image search. She’s pretty good looking. She probably has a substantive entry in Wikipedia but who cares about that? Anyway, all this talk about sexual relations has me wondering if she’s ever had too many of these and ended up in the back of one of these.

Decades ago, when I was in high school I had a friend who would go to movies like “Dirty Mary and Crazy Larry” or “Death Race 2000” or “Chatterbox” or some such and afterwards I’d ask how he liked the movie and he’d say, “Cool man, there was a great tit shot!”

And years ago there was an episode of the Simpsons, set in the future, where Marge says something like: “Fox turned into a hard-core porn network so gradually no one even noticed.”

There you have it.

MadisonMan said...

Do you need a great script for a decent movie, or does a disgusting script written by an illiterate retard doom a movie?

I think Helen Mirren and Maggie Smith and Bill Murray with a horrid script would be still a decent movie to watch.

Sienna Miller's main claim to fame is being Jude Law's main squeeze for a while.

Unknown said...

Sienna Miller dissed our city last year when she was here making a movie. We don't think of much of her here, there or anywhere.

Sienna disses

Unknown said...

Let me try that link again.

Sienna disses

vbspurs said...

Factory Girl sucked -- I saw an advanced DVD screener about a month ago.

Faculty Girl, on the other hand, was the touching tale of an overworked law professor, harrassed by colleagues, squirrels, bats, and sundry characters who follow her around, creating mischief about word verifications and what not. It was played beautifully by Jane Alexander, who also 'did' Eleanor Roosevelt.

I laughed, I cried, it became a part of me.

Cheers,
Victoria

Unknown said...

You mean Lou Reed of the Velvet Underground, that Lou Reed? You mean he's still alive?

Icepick said...

Are decent people allowed to use the word "retard" like that?

No. But poker players use that term all the time (and we're anything but decent people), as well as the shorter form "'tard". Synonymous with "donkey" and "donk" for a really horrible player.

Bird rock said...

test

Bissage said...

JohnK, I accept your challenge, sir, to a fair fight!

Edie versus Sienna.

The decision of the judges? Tough call!

vbspurs said...

Edie versus Sienna.

The decision of the judges? Tough call!


God, is that a tattoo I see on Sienna? Eww!

Well, I suppose I'd still choose Miss Miller, since Edie's track marks aren't that much better, either.

20 paces, gentlemen!

Cheers,
Victoria

Bird rock said...

I saw Lou Reed last night at the Brooklyn Academy of Music. He was sitting in the audience near me. His wife, Laurie Anderson, was performing with the Brooklyn Philharmonic along with Nellie McKay, Suzanne Vega and Joan Osborne. Lou's a strange looking little man. His face is absolutely ravaged. He's very thin but has a little potbelly. And he's quite short. Of course he can get away with "retard" because he's the very essence of NYC hipster cool. He wrote songs about transvestites, he shot heroin and his sexuality is rather ambiguous. It would be a different story if he was a country singer from Nashville but really, who cares?

That movie has been described as "troubled" for months now. The clip I saw was embarrassingly bad. I wonder if they'll even bother to release it theatrically. As for Sienna Miller, she's the current it girl in England, loved by the tabloids, sort of like a better-behaved Lindsey Lohan. But she's never quite caught on over here. This movie won't help.

Gordon Freece said...

"Retard" is totally cool. "Retard" is a word whose time has come. "Yih f****n' retahhhd!"


Bird Rock,

Has Reed made a decent record since Berlin? Or Anderson since Mister Heartbreak?

Paul Rinkes said...

"Magic and Loss" was pretty good.

Revenant said...

The movie may very well stink. But I can't imagine why we'd take Lou Reed's word for it. Some people think he's talented, and a lot of people think he's influential, but has anyone ever considered him intelligent or thoughtful? The guy's done more drugs than a roomful of Rolling Stones.