15 જુલાઈ, 2006

"Because you only let me take pictures of you when you're drunk."

Overheard, in a café this morning. I didn't hear the question that provoked this answer, so I'm just offering it up as a contest. You compose the question, you know, like in those New Yorker caption writing contests, which I despise. The reason I don't despise my own little contest is not (just) because it's mine, but because The New Yorker uses some damned picture that was drawn without a caption in mind, the readers come up with such poor ideas, and The New Yorker keeps doing it in spite of the nauseating mediocrity. On the other hand, I really did hear this quote, so there is a true answer somewhere out there lost in the past, and you will probably have some good ideas, and I'm not going to keep doing this if you don't.

IN THE COMMENTS: Lots of funny suggestions, but I'm going to declare a winner. It's AJ Lynch for
"How come we get always get drunk before we have sex?"

33 ટિપ્પણીઓ:

Jennifer કહ્યું...

Why do pictures of me look so ugly the next morning?

buddy larsen કહ્યું...

"How come I have to buy film every time I go the liquor store?"

I'm Full of Soup કહ્યું...

Barney said - "Moe- how come you never use your camera until happy hour is over?"

I'm Full of Soup કહ્યું...

How come we get always get drunk before we have sex?

Robert કહ્યું...

"How come every picture in this album is of me exposing myself in some fashion?"

Chennaul કહ્યું...

Why am I always wearing a lampshade?

Chennaul કહ્યું...

Wait...

That's so cliche.


Why am I always wearing a marmot?

buddy larsen કહ્યું...

uhhh...trouble at home, Johnny?

buddy larsen કહ્યું...

LOL--and the sun ain't even set yet!

Ron કહ્યું...

Why do you keep submitting my nude pics to Modern Drunkard to be their centerfold?

reader_iam કહ્યું...

Why don't we have any pictures of me that I can send to my mother?

reader_iam કહ્યું...

Why are my clothes always stained in the pictures you take?

Jennifer કહ્યું...

Wow, Gerry - party at your house!

Freeman Hunt કહ્યું...

Our dinner party starts at six--the guests will be here any minute! Why aren't you helping?! Why did you put those HMIs in the living room? Why are you wandering around the house with that light meter? Why is your tripod laying on the kitchen counter?

buddy larsen કહ્યું...

"Why do I look like I forgive you for ruining my life, in all these pictures?"

John Stodder કહ્યું...

How come there aren't any pictures of me in Utah?

J. Cricket કહ્યું...

Ann says: "and The New Yorker keeps doing it in spite of the nauseating mediocrity."

Awww. Haven't been picked, huh?

Ann Althouse કહ્યું...

Great answers! The sex theme is funny. I thought the most logical question, which no one's said yet, is: Why do I look drunk in every single picture you take of me?

The answer I think I like best... well, I'll wait to say. You can start voting. Keep adding more entries too. I'll pick a winner. The prize... ah, I don't know. A front page announcement of your answer... or question really. Hmmm.... this contest is like "Jeopardy."

Jennifer કહ્યું...

I'm voting for:

How come we always get drunk before we have sex? aj Lynch

My runner up: (do I get one?)

Why is Dick Cheney in all these pictures? Jim

Jennifer કહ્યું...

"Why am I wearing shorts in all these pictures?"

SippicanCottage કહ્યું...
આ ટિપ્પણી લેખક દ્વારા દૂર કરવામાં આવી છે.
buddy larsen કહ્યું...

"Why do you write poems about me when I'm sober?"

Sanjay કહ્યું...

I know it's too late. But: "Why must you always side with the police?" Requires an emphasis, in the reply, on the word "me."

Jim Kenefick કહ્યું...

"Why does everyone I meet recently have intimate, personal, gynecological details about me?

reader_iam કહ્યું...

Why don't carry my photo in your wallet?

reader_iam કહ્યું...

Why do you always want to use her as your model?

vh: wwoozabi

" 'm f'l'n a little w-wooz[y], [b]abi!"

reader_iam કહ્યું...

But my vote goes to this entry of Buddy's:

"How come I have to buy film every time I go the liquor store?"

Tibore કહ્યું...

"Why do I keep getting e-mail from guys calling me "Hot Momma Babe", and why's our internet bill so high?"

Tibore કહ્યું...

"How'd we get a 5 foot cake, 3 Chippendales dancers and a Llama in the same picture? At 3 different parties?"

Freeman Hunt કહ્યું...

My favorites:

"How come I have to buy film every time I go the liquor store?", "How come there aren't any pictures of me in Utah?", and "Why do I look like I forgive you for ruining my life, in all these pictures?"

Gahrie કહ્યું...

Why do you keep spiking my wheatgrass and mango slushies?

buddy larsen કહ્યું...

"Hey, I'm not NEAR as think as you drunk I am!"

buddy larsen કહ્યું...

...one more & then i quit...a lawyer joke:

"What's the difference between a lawyer and a setting hen?"

A setting hen clucks defiance.

ટિપ્પણી પોસ્ટ કરો

Please use the comments forum to respond to the post. Don't fight with each other. Be substantive... or interesting... or funny. Comments should go up immediately... unless you're commenting on a post older than 2 days. Then you have to wait for us to moderate you through. It's also possible to get shunted into spam by the machine. We try to keep an eye on that and release the miscaught good stuff. We do delete some comments, but not for viewpoint... for bad faith.