3 સપ્ટેમ્બર, 2026

"We’re like Adam and Eve trying to build the futuristic garden of Eden where you can just exist and your world takes better care of you than you could yourself."

Said Kate Tolo, 30, quoted in "My extreme life with Bryan Johnson, multimillionaire biohacker/He’s the Silicon Valley entrepreneur who famously injected his teenage son’s blood in a bid to reverse his biological age to 18. Kate Tolo is his collaborator and girlfriend. So what’s it like to be in a relationship with a man who has an obsession with staying young?" (London Times).

Johnson is 49.

I don't think 49 and 30 is such a bad age gap, but she does sound kind of naive... as presented to the public. Who knows what they are really like or how they're collaborating? How do I know they even have a sexual relationship? Well, there's this:
The couple’s nocturnal set-up involves Johnson retreating to the bedroom of his mansion in Los Angeles, strapping a tiny jet pack-like Bluetooth contraption to his penis to monitor his night-time erections and switching off the lights at 8pm. At her own apartment, Tolo does a few minutes of red-light therapy before inserting an acrylic vaginal “techno-tampon” that measures her period blood flow. 
As a “treat” for completing the 100 days, she says, “We’re gonna share a bed for three days and see what happens.” Whether they decide to extend the cohabitation depends, as do most things in Johnson’s life, on the data. “Studies show that women do tend to show slightly worse sleep on average when sleeping with partners,” Tolo says. “But if our results show otherwise, I’m open to it.”

They're all about measuring things. I'll bet Adam and Eve didn't do that, especially not in the Garden. And what was their age gap?  

62 ટિપ્પણીઓ:

Aggie કહ્યું...

Even just reading the headlines of stories like this is Too Much Information.

Whiskeybum કહ્યું...

Forget about Adam and Eve's age gap - Eve was made from Adam's rib!!

tim maguire કહ્યું...

Their relationship fails the "half his age plus 7" test, but he's a billionaire and not so old that he can't have a trophy wife.

If only he weren't so creepy-looking.

Lazarus કહ્યું...

Half your age plus seven years, so she's just outside his league. I don't know how much injecting teenage blood affects that. Does he have to go back every six months for a blood change?

" ... strapping a tiny jet pack-like Bluetooth contraption to his penis to monitor his night-time erections ..."

Why not go the whole distance and just get a sex robot?

rcommal કહ્યું...

I just can’t relate to the techno-meets-privates rituals. I mean, fine and all, but yuck. I don’t want to be that in synch with my body, let alone anyone else’s. And my brain gets distracted by the unrequested mental imagery, such that it’s hard for me to focus back on the rest of the piece. I wish I hadn’t followed the link

Bob Boyd કહ્યું...

what is "jet pack-like" about his penis monitor? Both have straps?
I think "tiny" was self-indulgent on the part of the writer.

Peachy+2 કહ્યું...

said things sometimes equals unread things.

Eric the Fruit Bat કહ્યું...

I might well be the only commenter here who is very, very interested in knowing everything there is to know about Ms. Tolo's menses and I will pay good money for an app that will let me track her nocturnal clitoral tumescence!

Kirk Parker કહ્યું...

Pretty sure God built the garden, and then handed it over to the first humans to manage it.

n.n કહ્યું...

Things best unsaid.

RideSpaceMountain કહ્યું...

I'm reminded of the movie "Demolition Man" where "fluid transfer" is no longer done and people have sex with neural simulators.

...stick with "fluid transfer". Jebus.

Aggie કહ્યું...

Well... Does the 'jet pack' have settings? Is it flesh-colored? Does it vibrate? C'mon, man.

RideSpaceMountain કહ્યું...

My wife is 13 years my junior. Not quite their age gap but it provides some unique insight and I definitely notice things. She cannot keep up with me intellectually. I have a hard time keeping up with her physically. It all balances out though. He youth is absolutely a necessity for our boys...if it was just me I'd be aging a year every month.

RideSpaceMountain કહ્યું...

Hot aerial jet pack fluid transfer ballet. Sexy. Trendy. Happening. Someone in Vegas stands to make a lot of money me thinks.

rehajm કહ્યું...

"strapping a tiny jet pack-like Bluetooth contraption to his penis"

...the Chinese will hack it just to mess with him. Who wouldn't?

rehajm કહ્યું...

I think I have that techno tampon monitor connected to my water main. It shuts off the flow if it exceeds 30 minutes...

Rabel કહ્યું...

49÷2=24.5
24.5+7=31.5

Class dismissed.

gspencer કહ્યું...

Eat well.
Stay fit.
Die anyway.

tcrosse કહ્યું...

Dick Van Dyke was 36, Mary Tyler Moore was 22 when they were paired as Rob and Laura Petrie.

Quaestor કહ્યું...

Whenever anyone compares himself to Adam and Eve, it's time to take careful note of the marked exits.

SweatBee કહ્યું...

Well, there's also the fact that they post his post-coital biometric data on X. He also posted a picture of himself watching Kate get a pelvic exam at the doctor's office.

mccullough કહ્યું...

The matriarchal upbringing of those born in the mid 80s to 90s stunted growth. She’s 30 going on 13.

Get the fuck away from Johson. He’s a vampire.

Ampersand કહ્યું...

Bryan Johnson must have embarked upon his very public quest for life extension fully aware that he was exposing himself to all sorts of ridicule. Life is different for people unafraid of seeming weird.

mccullough કહ્યું...

Life is different for a guy who dumps his wife and three kids then uses his kids for blood transfusions to stay young. At age 49.

RideSpaceMountain કહ્યું...

"The matriarchal upbringing of those born in the mid 80s to 90s stunted growth."

"We're a generation of men raised by women. I'm wondering if another woman is really the answer we need." - Tyler Durden

PDM કહ્યું...

Thank you, Rabel at 12:15; I can quit scratching my head over several posts above yours.

Saint Croix કહ્યું...

According to the NY Post, they have not had sex in the four years of their relationship. I don't know if "Adam and Eve" is the comparison I would be making.

I don't think that young blood is working!

strapping a tiny jet pack-like Bluetooth contraption to his penis to monitor his night-time erections

I was like, why? And now I'm like, oh my God, it's foreplay. Scientific, crazy-ass, boring as shit foreplay.

Saint Croix કહ્યું...

She blinded me with science.

gilbar કહ્યું...

..I don't think 49 and 30 is such a bad age gap..

well, let's Do The Math!
half of 49 is 24 and a half...
24 and a half plus 7 is 31 and a half
30 is LESS THAN 31 and a half.. THUS it is CREEPY (by definition)

gilbar કહ્યું...

i see that Rabel beat me to it.. Thanx Rabel

gilbar કહ્યું...

I've met bizaare iconclastic weirdo that QUESTION the 1/2 + 7 math
All i can say to THEM is: Who Knows MORE about marriage?
You? or Jane Austen?

Valentine Smith કહ્યું...

He reminds me of the jogging guru back in the 70’s Fixx, Dead in his early 40s from heart disease. Something will get this guy or he’ll have a total mental breakdown. Not that he ain’t there now.

Hassayamper કહ્યું...

***
My wife is 13 years my junior. Not quite their age gap but it provides some unique insight and I definitely notice things.
***

My parents had nearly the same gap, and a happy, loving, faithful marriage that lasted almost 50 years until my dad's demise.

I have ZERO inclination to lend any attention or respect to the type of people who think it's their business to police and critique the romantic choices made by consenting adults of varying ages. It does not escape my notice that a large majority of them seem to be single and divorced women of a certain age.

Howard કહ્યું...

***Tech entrepreneur and biohacker Bryan Johnson described his girlfriend Kate Tolo's vaginal health as scoring a "100/100 score" and being in the "top 1% of all vaginas".He shared these details on social media alongside a graph of her test results from an at-home vaginal microbiome test by Tiny Health. He praised her microbiome data, noting it reflected a healthy, L. crispatus-dominant state.***

Howard કહ્યું...

***Bryan Johnson schedules sexual activity as part of his strict longevity routine, but he has not publicly stated an exact, fixed numerical frequency for how often they have intercourse.

He and his long-term partner, Kate Tolo, do measure and track intimate data, including sex and post-sex biomarkers, as part of their health tracking. However, specific schedules or counts of intercourse frequency are kept private, even though he openly shares other unusual health metrics related to their relationship.

Key details of his routine include:

Scheduled Intimacy: He includes scheduled sex as part of his strict daily lifestyle rules.

Time Restrictions: He enforces a strict rule against having sex or intimate activity late at night, specifically avoiding it after 8:30 PM to protect his sleep schedule.

Separate Living Arrangements: They maintain separate bedrooms and even separate homes to optimize sleep quality and longevity, meaning they do not co-sleep.***

Howard કહ્યું...

***Tech entrepreneur and biohacker Bryan Johnson was diagnosed with autoimmune gastritis, a rare, chronic condition where the immune system mistakenly attacks the acid-producing cells in the stomach lining. He described the condition on social media by saying his "stomach is eating itself".***

Howard કહ્યું...

I'm sure it has nothing to do with eating 200 capsules of God knows what every day.

Leora કહ્યું...

For some reason this makes me think of Tiny Tim and Miss Vicky getting married on the Johnny Carson show.

Jamie કહ્યું...

Well, this whole thing sounds just terrible!

Although I admit that the jetpack caused me to envision... something... zooming around the bedroom. All on its own, I imagine; surely this year's model is detachable, if you're attaching a jetpack to it.

RideSpaceMountain કહ્યું...

"It does not escape my notice that a large majority of them seem to be single and divorced women of a certain age."

I know all about this. I'm 6'2" and 250lb with an 11% BMI and look like Ric Flair with no hair. My wife is Brazilian and looks like a young Tulsi Gabbard and the looks "women of a certain age" give us sometimes - especially me - when we're out could chip ice like a child-murdering pink-haired pickaxe armed feminazi with a nose ring. On only one occasion as one of these heifers dared to say something about it, a decision she definitely regretted.

Eff them all. It is absolutely none of their business, nor is it anyone's fault but their own that they have expectations of a queen and personality of a goldfish which is why they ended up alone or underattached to someone they're unsatisfied with.

More men need to start calling out this bs.

Peachy+2 કહ્યું...

Thomas Dolby - why this song?

tommyesq કહ્યું...

" I don't know how much injecting teenage blood affects that."

I wonder whether the constant removal of blood has any negative impacts on the son. I also question whether the son has consented, and whether he has done so not under any form of coercion.

tommyesq કહ્યું...

And, for that matter, whether the son consented to being publicized as his absentee-father's "blood boy."

Smilin' Jack કહ્યું...

“ The couple’s nocturnal set-up involves…….
I wonder if he has an aversion to sunlight and garlic. I I were her, I’d keep a crucifix handy, just in case.

Jaq કહ્યું...

Half your age plus seven.

Indefinitely Extended Excursion™️ કહ્યું...

His Epitaph: He was so afraid of death, he forgot to live his life.

Reminded me a little of this:
Nietzsche in 1881: “God is dead.”
God in 1900: “Nietzsche is dead.”

Smilin' Jack કહ્યું...

Blogger mutilated my comment, but you get the gist.

RideSpaceMountain કહ્યું...

"Reminded me a little of this:
Nietzsche in 1881: “God is dead.”
God in 1900: “Nietzsche is dead.”

Bryan Johnson in 2026: "I am God"
God in the future: "Lol nice try Bryan"

Saint Croix કહ્યું...

Peachy, thanks for that link. I'm enjoying it.

Here's a fun little clip about Thomas Dolby's revenge

Saint Croix કહ્યું...

What cracks me up about that story is that the scientist he hired to play the mad scientist was a disaster on set. One day he just shouted out, "Science!" for no damn reason. And Dolby wrote the whole song around it.

Hearing the story that Thomas Dolby tells of hiring Dr. Magnus Pyke to the exclamations like "science!" is a riot. He appears in the video as well and here is what Dolby had to say about that: "I bumped into Dr. Pyke many years later, in Edinburgh at a conference. He’d just returned from a lecture tour of the USA. I asked him how it had gone. “Badly, Dolby,” he spat back. “Every time I walked down the sidewalk someone would sneak up behind me and yell ‘SCIENCE!’ at the top of their lungs! It seems that bloody MTV video of yours is more widely recognized than my body of scientific work.”"

Temujin કહ્યું...

Their nighttime procedures are not exactly what I'd call...sexy. Certainly not a relationship where they cannot keep their paws off of each other. Instead, they insert or attach mechanical devices, record the readings, share them with one another, and...and...and...do that again.
Sounds stunted.

Jaq કહ્યું...

Whoever got that quote from God,; what a scoop!

Jaq કહ્યું...

Dang it, it’s hard to properly edit a post from a phone

rsbsail કહ્યું...

I'm going to go out on a limb and suggest Bryan Johnson is a full-blown narcissist. Assuming he lives to age 70, he will realize there is more to life than just life.

Lazarus કહ્યું...

He will live forever and when the bell tolls it will toll for Tolo, not Johnson?

Howard કહ્યું...

I'll take Gypsy Boots and Jack LaLanne for health span role models rather than some Nosferatu looking dude

Biff કહ્યું...

"I'll bet Adam and Eve didn't do that, especially not in the Garden. And what was their age gap?"

"With the Lord a day is like a thousand years, and a thousand years are like a day." - 2 Peter 3:8

Joe Bar કહ્યું...

I looked them up, and I do not find them visually interesting.

There are lots of couples in the "creepy" zone. So what? They're happy. That's all that matters for the relationship.

Known Unknown કહ્યું...

Techno Tampon's last album was pretty disappointing.

Iman કહ્યું...

“Techno Tampon's last album was pretty disappointing.”

Disappointing?! It was a bloody mess!

Josephbleau કહ્યું...

The world is going to take better care of me than my $100 million will. But as for you all, you’re fooked.

Achilles કહ્યું...

Howard said...

I'll take Gypsy Boots and Jack LaLanne for health span role models rather than some Nosferatu looking dude

I am going to vote for 4-7 miles of running plus stations per day.

I was in decent shape before but I started doing Hyrox style workouts. I haven't done anything for HRT over the last month and the plumbing is running like new.

Extended zone 3/4 cardio is how we were meant to live.

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