January 30, 2024

"Who cares. Didn't read it. This is not news. Do better"/"Why do I feel like these characters are being forced on us? Nobody cares."

"Who cares?"/"Congratulations - this might be the most vapid article the Washington Post has ever published"/"Thanks for explaining this, WaPo. Now I won't be tossing and turning tonight wondering"... etc. 

These are the comments on what is the second-most-read article at The Washington Post right now:

 

Sample text: "With the internet swirling with theories about Megan’s lyrics, Minaj took to X (formerly Twitter) to voice her displeasure with the song and announce her follow-up 'Big Foot,' which she released on Monday. The title appeared to be a reference to Megan’s 5-foot-10 height and the fact that she was shot in the foot...."

It took 2 reporters to write it... these 2...


I would watch a movie about those 2 reporters trying to collaborate to fulfill this writing assignment. A bit like another remake of "The Front Page," you know, that sort of thing.

74 comments:

gilbar said...

who cares? not me

Wilbur said...

WAPO readers reveal their racism.

Oh wait, WAPO readers are Leftists, so scratch that.

RideSpaceMountain said...

"Herb Scribner"

Now there's a name. Funny thing about scribes is that down through almost all human history writing was a very serious thing that was seldom done for pleasure. The scribes were always there to serve a purpose, but most especially to serve the elite, their masters.

You can begin to see in many ways how little has changed. Herb is still writing for his masters. Whichever ones care about this vapid drool-inducing shit and desire to make the rest of us care about it too.

Would you care to enlighten us who your masters are Mr. Scribner? Perhaps a shred of investigative, non-WAP reporting? Ah. Didn't think so.

Mary Beth said...

When things are slow at work, I look at Google News. Almost every story I clicked on yesterday was sourced from reddit. It could be that I'm teaching Google that I like garbage news. It's not intentional. I see a headline and wonder who these people are that I'm supposed to know, so I click on it and find I was better off not knowing.

Leland said...

Clickbait works, so expect more clickbait.

Don’t expect coverage of the Abbott/Biden feud.

Tina Trent said...

Lot of good names for cats in that post. Otherwise I'm confused.

Dave Begley said...

Wicked writing by Althouse.

jaydub said...

I don't know who either one of these people are.
So, I've got that going for me. Which is nice.

Ann Althouse said...

Putting the WAP in WAPO

Ann Althouse said...

Things I wrote so you wouldn't have to

tim maguire said...

I don't know who Megan is, I barely know who Manaj is. Good for readers for pushing back. This kind of fake controversy usually has one more step to it--false accusations that "the public sucks because they're all going crazy of over {whatever]."

I see crap like this all the time on social media.

boatbuilder said...

The readers of the WaPo Style page are looking for insightful reporting on critical and important issues.

Who knew?

John henry said...

But what are the reporter's pronouns? It looks like they left out the most important part of the story.

John Henry

John henry said...



Is it true that when Megan got shot in the foot the ambulance refused to take her to the hospital?

Apparently they told her she needed to call a toe truck instead

John Henry

Tom T. said...

"Herb Scribner" sounds like a default placeholder for a reporter who's taken his name off a piece. Like Alan Smithee in the movie industry.

rehajm said...

this might be the most vapid article the Washington Post has ever published

Not even close…

rehajm said...

Yep, fun da men tally transform America…

Howard said...

Again what does most popular mean in terms of population statistics? Essentially zero is my guess. Journalism is about competing for the crumbs left at the table. There is no meaning here.

Dear corrupt left, go F yourselves said...

We will be made to care about the vapid celebrity distractions. All while the corrupt white left tell you to Hate Trump ... over and over endlessly.

Dave Begley said...

Read the lyrics to WAP.

Remarkable.

Cappy said...

Is there a contest?

Iman said...

Fiendishly clever… Damn you, Althouse!

Iman said...

Democracy Dies During a Douche.

Aggie said...

"I would watch a movie about those 2 reporters trying to collaborate to fulfill this writing assignment. A bit like another remake of "......."

Hmm, thrilling and action-packed, thinking Woodward & Bernstein. 'All the Strumpet's Cellulite'? Or maybe, 'The Ruckus in the Tuchis'

Too Large, Didn't Read.

Mike of Snoqualmie said...

I'd comment, but I don't care enough to do that.

J Severs said...

Bread and circuses AND music. WaPo is one step ahead of the Romans.

J Severs said...

Also, thank you Professor for taking this hit for the team.

donald said...

“Democracy something something darkness”.

donald said...

Hell yeah Ann!

Jamie said...

Putting the WAP in WAPO

1/30/24, 6:38 AM
Blogger Ann Althouse said...
Things I wrote so you wouldn't have to


Heh.

Temujin said...

How to illustrate "This is why reporters and editors are being laid off en masse at 'news' organizations all around the industry" without actually saying it.

TestTube said...

It would be a short movie -- ten minutes showing the reporters lightly rewriting press releases helpfully provided by the singers' agents.

If this is the sort of thing you find exciting, I would be happy to set up a teleconference to let you watch as I incorporate my project manager's edits into the latest course guide. A thrill a minute, let me tell you; You haven't lived until you've seen me spend a morning in Adobe FrameMaker.

Duke Dan said...

I thought they had a common beef with Ben Shapiro (who has the number one rap ‘song’ on iTunes this week)

rehajm said...

Do not describe your Nicki Minaj/Megan Thee Stallion strategy - the campaign has enough suggestions already…

Tina Trent said...

My goodness, Dave Begley. Note that the lyrics to WAP took five writers.

Oligonicella said...

Althouse:
I would watch a movie about those 2 reporters trying to collaborate to fulfill this writing assignment.

Why? Two reporters hacking up an equivalent to the rags you find in the racks at checkout.

I'd rather watch Tinkerbell with a great grandchild.

wendybar said...

Good one!! Cardi sure did love her some Joe Biden in the WH at first. Now that she is having second thoughts, and will she take her WAP elsewhere??

Wince said...

The WaPo has turned into a professional wrestling magazine from the 1960-70s.

Mingus Jerry said...

Reminds me of the Yogi Berra quote that nobody goes there anymore because it's too crowded. Nobody cares about this story so much it's the second-most-read article on the site.

Dave Begley said...

The first time I heard Ashford & Simpson, I loved them. They had previously written hits for others, but when they sang together it was magic. "Solid" is just one example.

They were married and the hotness and sexuality showed in the lyrics and videos.

Nick died very young of throat or lung cancer. But Valerie is still alive and performs in N.J. I'd love to get Valerie's unvarnished take on WAP and other similar songs.

Bob Boyd said...

Herb Scribner should write a book about phytotherapy.

Bob Boyd said...

I wonder if Nikki and Megan are on the Biden wish list of celebrity endorsements.

Beaver7216 said...

Just when I thought my day could not get worse, I googled "wap lyrics".

Michael said...

When I think of WAP I imagine what Bach might have thought of it. Brilliant lyrics, of course, but musically unsound.

Old and slow said...

WAP turned out to be even more grotesque than I had imagined. Wow.

cassandra lite said...

Remember when Doonesbury’s Rick Redfern had to labor in the stultifying vapidness of People magazine before becoming a “real” reporter for WaPo? Now it would be reversed.

If Trudeau had any remaining wit and weren’t a braindead partisan, he’d put out a one-off extended strip satirizing this.

khematite said...

It would be a nice twist if the movie remake had these two reporters going off to get married and their editor calling the police to tell them to stop the two because they had stolen his watch. But then thinking better of it and telling the police "Never mind. Let them go. They weren't exactly Woodward & Bernstein."

Howard said...

Nice ego boost for the downtrodden.

Ignorance is Bliss said...

Reading the blog headline I assumed these were all quotes from Melania Trump's wardrobe.

Oso Negro said...

Was Wet Ass Pussy about a yeast infection?

Iman said...

‘Just when I thought my day could not get worse, I googled "wap lyrics" ‘

Beaver, I’d thought that you - of ALL people - would be totes down with those lyrics.

Jupiter said...

Fat, ugly, stupid negro women = pop culture? Is there a picture of one or both of them twerking? I understand they do that.

Jupiter said...

"Things I wrote so you wouldn't have to."

Alright, that was pretty funny.

So, is Jeff Bezos married to one or both of those things?

Jupiter said...

And what's with this thing where the woman is called a "stallion"? I can't claim complete ignorance like some of you people, but I was mostly assuming it must be some kind of tranny thing -- "Megan Theeee Stallion". Some guy in a bra, with a shiny wig. Twerking, no doubt. But I gather that's not the case. So is this like "Adam Kinzinger, Theee Whiney, Little Bitch"?

nbks said...

So glad we have these highly credentialed white ppl to explain feuds amongst Black celebrities to upper middle-class Americans

Rusty said...

I'm certain this is exciting news to someone who cares.

walter said...

Swirling indeed.

PM said...

My Beverly Hills cafe will serve Cardi Beans, Megan Thee Scallions, Da Bratwursts and Lil' Kimchi with Sticky Minaj.

GingerBeer said...

Keep in mind WaPo has eliminated 260 positions since October '23,w/ more likely to come. Somehow, while WaPo winnowed the crop, these two managed to avoid the chaff pile. BTW, which one is "Hildy?"

JaimeRoberto said...

I have a hard time imagining spending the kind of money that it takes to go to an expensive school just to end up writing about a couple of pop tarts, and not even being able to do that by myself.

Original Mike said...

What's with the fingernails? Do they take them off as soon as are get off-camera? How could you function with those things?

James K said...

Even if the topic is of interest, this trend for reporters to "explain" rather than, well, report, is really annoying. It's condescending, and it's not their job. And it's usually not explanation but spin. And in the rare case where I might want some actual explanation (it would be in the form "Here are some facts that are helpful to understand this story"), there's no need to hit me over the head with it in a headline. They should just provide enough information in the story that it makes sense.

I first noticed this in Vox, where at least in the early years, it seemed that practically every story was an "explanation," by the likes of Ezra ("The Constitution is over 100 years old") Klein, no less.

Tina Trent said...

Yeah, I think we should all thank Dave Begley for making us click on the WAP lyrics. It reminded me of the time when my city council member wanted me to help her take back Atlanta's public television station, where they were literally showing porn with under-aged girls. Then her security staff told her it was too dangerous, and we dropped it.

Sometimes two overeager white women aren't fools. But I could never get the Mayor's staff to take action. Since then, I don't think I could count the gun murders in and outside of those taxpayer-funded studios.

Chocolate City. Not a slur -- that's the politically-connected club where they got the girls from.

Bad times.

mikee said...

What an interesting post - it is an invitation to commenters to analyze and opine on the post, the Post and the Post's post on two people (or really, four people) we don't know from mailbox posts.

Rocco said...

Beaver7216 said...
"Just when I thought my day could not get worse, I googled 'wap lyrics'."

Since some of you might be offended by the vulgarities, I've quoted the clean lyrics below:

"*"

rehajm said...

Ignorance is Bliss said...
Reading the blog headline I assumed these were all quotes from Melania Trump's wardrobe.


You've still got it my friend. Hope you are well...

walter said...

(Ba)Cardi Boobs would kick their wet asses.

Anonymous said...

And... comments are now closed on this WaPo article after only 66 comments. Guess WaPo editors didn't like the trend of all the negative comments....

B. said...

Who did the “ Editorial Aide” have to do to get this published?

Joanne Jacobs said...

I'm surprised that the Post features the writer's education as well as their experience. Why does it matter where these folks went to college?

BonHagar said...

These kinds of 'feud' stories are ginned up just to tag ads next to them. In the same way Republican vs dem/marxist political 'controversies' are manufactured. It's lazy writing 'cause the 'controversies' write themselves. Yet what's wrong with DC (and entertainment) is that these ostensibly warring factions collude to undermine reality, forsake quality, and find more ways to make the populace part with their money & liberties, and worst of all, any real observational/critical thinking skills.

B Dubya said...

Whenever I see the name "Megan Thee Stallion", I am once again reminded that she/they/it are a functioning illiterate, a product of her culture and the unionized US education system. I'll bet her "teachers" couldn't wait to get this critter out of their classrooms, hoping to pass her on to someone else, anyone else. Pretty sure there was no grade inflation going on there, no sir.

Her fiscal success relies exclusively on twitter controversy and the support of her illiterate peers. It's almost like she is preying on her own community.

Stoutcat said...

These are the comments on what is the second-most-read article at The Washington Post right now..."

Second-most read, or only second-most clicked on?

FullMoon said...

After following Begleys suggestion about lyrics, went to the video. Not bad, although closed captions do not seem to work.
Some comments there are pretty funny
Youtube vid