"... you’ve got those horrid goggles on, you’re inhaling smelly water, seeing nobody, discombobulated, repeating, repeating, repeating, like a sprat in an aquarium, or a prisoner in the exercise yard. That’s going to give you mental health issues, that is. Not solve them.
And if you do go and try to have fun, especially with your children, they come over and tell you to stop having fun. No diving! No bombing! No running! What the hell are you allowed to do? Just grind up and down, or stand there in the shallow end, talking about your divorce, or the pizza you’re going to have later? I gave up trying to teach my children to swim.... Swimming beautifully is just another dreary middle-class accomplishment like skiing and bridge and playing the cello — an indicator of wealth and class and very little else."
Writes Giles Coren in "No one’s impressed by your hypothermia/Addicts think their icy dips sharpen the mind, but what addled lunatic wants to go swimming outdoors in December?" (London Times).
By the way, I love his podcast, "Giles Coren has no idea," where he brainstorms with his wife about what he should write about in his column. The 2 of them talk very fast, so if you like to hear smart married people banter, this is just great.
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27 comments:
Swimming is a safety skill. Not everyone needs to be a competitive swimmer but having the confidence to be in the water is likely helpful to all.
There's a local YMCA pool with the sweetest water. They must use ozone or something instead of chlorine. Swimming there, on any reasonable weather day, is relaxing, strenuous, social, soothing. And does not screw up my 60 year old knees.
The same human lives that once breathed in their mother's sanctuary womb. Diversity of individuals, minority of one... equal and complementary.
My friend said to his wife: "I read that if a man is going to be healthy, he needs to have at least 28 orgasms a month."
Quick as a wink, his wife says: "I don't know how you're going to manage that with your carpel tunnel."
Swimming IS much more enjoyable.. If you're Going Somewhere;
Preferably, to an island in the middle of the lake
I do hope his kids finish learning to swim. I'm poor at it but still really glad my parents made me learn.
'...you’re inhaling smelly water...'
This is not swimming.
This is drowning...
Swimming beautifully is just another dreary middle-class accomplishment like skiing and bridge and playing the cello — an indicator of wealth and class and very little else
How DARE you enjoy something!
The water was 47°F at Walden Pond this morning. Very stimulate. At first it's cold, then it burns. The ice cream headache goes away after 10-minutes. Once you get out, your metabolism goes thermonuclear. The air temperature was in the middle fifties, not bad. I'm a wimp in a wetsuit. A couple people training for the ice mile were in speedos.
Air temperature will be in the mid 30's tomorrow morning. Should be fun. I got two other folks swimming with me tomorrow.
living in Australia swimming isa safety skill.
I am not surprised that a Londoner doesn't see the need for swimming, but then again they don't have any sun or water there to make it enjoyable to get outside and swim.
Also if you have ever seen the show Bondi Rescue about life guards in Sydney you will see that 1/2 the people they save from drowning at the beach are Brits, of one strip or another.
Nothing says "community" like swimming in a pool that everyone's peed in.
Much as my father had to teach my mother to cook, I had to teach my wife to swim. Not that I'm a great swimmer--I was one of old Mel Cooney's (Cooley's?) hard cases in my day--but a person who can't swim is a danger to themselves and possibly others. We made sure our son learned early (Waterbabies and all that jazz.)
Neither of them swim even as much as I do, which isn't much, but they can if they must.
Boyd, tell your friend to try using the other hand. I'm told it feels like somebody else.
I've always enjoyed Giles Coren's writing.
"...just another dreary middle-class accomplishment..."
Let's not be dreary. Let's go burn down some buildings or something.
"Smile at other humans,bump into friends"? Doesn't seem to equate to our hostess's AM run descriptions. Actually, as this is her personal ruminations blog, seems she never meets anybody she doesn't avoid? I too engage in first thing AM walks but, the best part is meeting people (regulars and newbies), especially those with canines, to enjoy short interactions with.
I first ran into Mr. Coren (and Sue Perkins) about 15 years ago, when he did a sendup of "Supersize Me" called "The Supersizers Go X". X being a variety of historical periods and living off the foods for about a week, and getting a health check before and after.
It started a hobby cooking historical recipes.
Glad to know he's still out there. Though I get the feeling he's skeptical of just about anything not currently endorsed by the majority...
Ann, Ann, Ann...posting this is like flicking Howard with a wet towel across his toned and barely Speedo-covered buns as he admires them in the rear-view mirror he wears swimming Walden Pond.
"No one’s impressed by your hypothermia/Addicts think their icy dips sharpen the mind, but what addled lunatic wants to go swimming outdoors in December?" (London Times).
It takes a few "dips" to get your metabolism to the point where your body can handle this. One of the best ways to improve your mitochondrial health is to shock your body with cold water. This forces your mitochondria to reset and to refresh.
It is now being found out that many if not most diseases start with problems in your mitochondria with specific reference to cancer, alzheimers/parkinsons, and heart disease.
Ann wants to call this person smart.
Smart people don't broadcast their ignorance of a topic as some sort of badge of coolness or superiority. This is something that intellectuals and experts do. On top of that he is a journalist.
If he was smart he would go ask people why they do it.
But Ann is into sneering condescension rather than intellectual curiosity I guess.
Swimming beautifully is an accomplishment. Not teaching your kids to swim at all can lead to their drowning. How does this jerk handle teaching his kids to drive, which an even more middle class accomplishment? Does he just whine about that, too, and let his kids fail their driver's test again and again and again?
I never thought of my ability to swim a decent Australian Crawl as a middle class accomplishment, but he's right! We had a pool and my parents paid for lessons.
My grandmother, an English immigrant, would join us occasionally in the pool. She would dog paddle and cover about 4 inches of distance. I don't even know when in her life she would've had the chance to learn that much.
My California High School had a pool and a high diving board. We all learned how to swim in PE class, and how to jump off a sinking ship. We also learned how to drive a car. Some of us knew how to do those things before the classes. We also learned chemistry and physics, US history, and US government.
Fred Drinkwater, that YMCA pool may have salt chlorination.
We switched to salt in our pool from chemical chlorination--wonderful!
But I've never heard of it in large public pools.
Saint Croix said (in a later post)...
An Islamic regime must be serious in every field. There are no jokes in Islam. There is no humor in Islam. There is no fun in Islam. There can be no fun and joy in whatever is serious.
Islam does not allow swimming in the sea...
I swim for fun with the kids and grandkids in the lake. In the summer. After the water gets over 80F. When I was younger, 75 would do fine, but nowadays it is just too cold for me. In the late fall, winter and early spring, I go to the gym and swim for fun and exercise, and yes, swimming laps, alternating between overhand crawl, back stroke, dog paddling, and floating on your back just idling along and catching your breath is fun to me. I just love to be in the water. I love running too, but can no longer run due to my left ankle. After the restorative surgery, the surgeon warned me I would be able to walk and even some hiking, but running was going to be problematic.
""Smile at other humans,bump into friends"? Doesn't seem to equate to our hostess's AM run descriptions. Actually, as this is her personal ruminations blog, seems she never meets anybody she doesn't avoid?"
This blog rarely covers my real-world activities! "Personal ruminations"? It's nearly entirely about things I read about the world at large, not what I do personally. I do, by necessity, only take photos of things in my immediate environment, but I don't impose on other people by putting their images here. I have an exception for people who are making a spectacle of themselves (e.g., protesters), and I occasionally show a family member (with permission). But this is not a blog about my personal relationships. How could you possibly think it was?
I don't particularly enjoy swimming, but this guy is trying too hard.
I don't particularly enjoy swimming, but this guy is trying too hard.
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