I had never until yesterday thought about how tall Jesus was. The question arose yesterday, when I was blogging about a NYT article that described a man as having "Christ-length hair." Some commenters brought up the question whether we know the length of Christ's hair, but to my mind, the grammatical construction "Christ-length hair" means (unintentionally) hair the length of Christ.
That's ludicrously long hair, whether Jesus was tall as the actors who've portrayed him in the movies — such as Diogo Morgado who is 6'3" or Max von Sydow, who was 6'4" — or as short as the average man in the time and place where he lived — which might be 5'1":
From an analysis of skeletal remains, archeologists had firmly established that the average build of a Semite male at the time of Jesus was 5 ft. 1 in., with an average weight of about 110 pounds.” I admit that it feels a bit strange to think of being over a foot taller than Jesus! But it’s good to have our cultural preconceptions—even prejudices—challenged....In yesterday's post, when I said "I looked up how tall was Jesus and saw the estimate that he was only 5'1"," a commenter (Darrell) retorted: "He is God--and He could be any height that pleased Him." Are we to infer God, taking on the life of a man, would definitely want to be tall? What's more sacrilegious, imputing a height preference to God or assuming Jesus was within the bell curve of height for men of that time and place?
We do know that in the writings, Jesus and people in his area sustained themselves on bread and fish.... Jesus height probably we stunted by his diet. Plus, we know that Jesus also practiced the art of fasting like so many other religions... [T]he average roman male was probably between 5′ 3″- 5′ 5″. Jesus was alive during that time, but he was not roman, and he did not live the same life. The 2 inches of difference which would result from the lifestyle difference and the hardship of his life suggest the value by archeologists is quite accurate. In conclusion, I would say that the real height of the historical Jesus Christ was probably between 5’0- 5′ 2″.
One answer is do not think about the height of Jesus. I've lived twice as long as Jesus and had not thought until yesterday about how tall he was.
But I went looking for Biblical text on the subject of how Jesus looked, and I found this useful page, with verses from the Old and New Testaments.
For he grew up before him like a young plant, and like a root out of dry ground; he had no form or majesty that we should look at him, and no beauty that we should desire him. He was despised and rejected by men; a man of sorrows, and acquainted with grief; and as one from whom men hide their faces he was despised, and we esteemed him not. Surely he has borne our griefs and carried our sorrows; yet we esteemed him stricken, smitten by God, and afflicted.That's Isaiah 53:1-12. I would interpret "he had no form or majesty that we should look at him" to mean that Jesus was not tall.
On the subject of whether we should be thinking in terms of what height God would choose for himself, there's also Isaiah 55:8-9:
For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, declares the Lord. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.
পোস্টগুলি
১২৪টি মন্তব্য:
Bigger than life?
He was huuuuge.
Let's be honest, Jesus probably looked a lot like President Trump.
Or Obama .............. GAAAAAAAAAAAAAA !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
He wasn't tall, but he had great hops. Dunked on the Pharisees all the time! And did a 360 on Satan in the wilderness!
How much did Jesus bench?
- james james
Well, we know he wasn’t as big as the Beatles.
Appearance for Jesus was meaningless, it was the message. I suspect his appearance did not lend itself to being the Messiah. They mocked him when he claimed he was the coming King. And they continue to mock him today.
A short Jesus might have had a Napoleon Complex.
Jesus this post is long as your hair.
It's the faith lesson that's important, not the supposed physical dimensions. Most of the great figures mentioned in the Bible and the Torah were flawed individuals, quite literally the least likely to be considered grand and wonderful. Christ's physical appearance would've been His least impressive characteristic.
http://greatshroudofturinfaq.com/Science/Image/height.html
Isaiah was, when I was in Sunday school, in the Old Testament.
A main theme in the Bible is God using the humble to bring about his will. The whole, "but we preach Christ crucified: a stumbling block to Jews and foolishness to Gentiles,'" thing. Joseph(in the Old Testament) started his career in Egypt as a slave. Joseph (New Testament) was a carpenter.
Here is a link to what Jesus could have looked like, which for some reason some atheists think Christians will find "shocking."
If you look around the Internet you can find images of Jesus as an Asian, Indian, Nigerian, etc. Each culture depicts Christ through the lens of their Society.
That should be "His will."
Jesus was a fearsome five footer...
From Jesus and the Money Changers (John 2:13-16)
by James F. McGrath
“Some people call it the “temple tantrum.” Others refer to it as the “cleansing of the temple.” Anyone who knows anything about Jesus, whether from books, movies, or other sources, seems to know at least this one incident, in which Jesus turns over tables full of coins and chases away animals. Most historians agree that an actual occurrence lies behind this story in the Gospels. But beyond that, there is a lot of disagreement. When did the event occur? And what motivated Jesus to drive money changers and sellers of animals out of the temple courts?”
His mother Mary was about 4'6".
The image on the Shroud of Turin is 5'7" to 6'2".
Addendum: By way of comparison Judy Garland was about 4'10".
This is a great example of our Host's process. You are welcome to argue her sources, but her conclusion is fact based. Disagree for sure, but you better have the supporting facts that make your sources superiour.
Of course, the physical Crist, is nothing but "God in mans image". And of course as others have pointed out, its the message that is huge, not the messager.
The most important question is this -- just how buff is God?
Years ago my best friend had shoulder-length hair and a mustache.
Me: "Dave, you should grow a beard."
Dave: "Why?"
Me: "Because then you'd look like Jesus."
Dave: "I can't grow a beard."
Me: "Why not?"
Dave: "I'm too highly evolved."
And what motivated Jesus to drive money changers and sellers of animals out of the temple courts?
Whenever anyone asks WWJD, I try to remind them that overturning tables and whipping people with cords is on the table.
Did Jesus have 6 pack abs? How much could he bench press?
He's a man, just a man/
And I have had so many men before/
And in very many ways/
He's just one more.
Whenever you hear about "They sure were short back in those days" - doesn't know what he's talking about. We cant' do a valid statistical sample - everyone's dead and we don't have enough skeletons either.
People think Napoleon was short - he wasn't. People think Knights were short - they weren't.
“Surely he hath borne our griefs” - Messiah, no. 22, conducted by the amazing John Eliot Gardiner and sung by the fabulous Monteverdi Choir. https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=s8dE8cU4308
I’ve come to feel that Jesus drove out the money changers in a loving defense of the sanctity of his father’s house. Yes the law at that time required that temple worshipers sacrifice various animals, but the profiteers moved in and with no care for the sacredness of the ordinance, leveraged the law into their own ends and advantage by seeking to make profit off the need for those animals. Then others saw the opportunity to further profit off of the holiness of the temple, by declaring the worlds’ coins too corrupted to be used in the temple. For their own benefit and purposes they minted a more “holy” coin, then set up a currency exchange market (trading floor) from which they could (of course) rent seek and pocket the bid-ask spread. It was no longer about holiness to the Lord, it was about making money off of God’s call to worship. Jesus finally could stand it no more and drove them out to purify his fathers house.
These fact patterns never get old.
My Father, about 5'11", assured me, when I was young, that Jesus, being perfect, was exactly six feet tall.
Regards — Cliff
Short people avoid saying that somebody is a tall man, lest people wonder what a short person considers tall.
This could be checked in the gospels.
Not baby Jesus. I know it's Christmas, but I'm thinking about the grown man Jesus.
Dear Lord Baby Jesus.
Jason Statham woudl be good for the temple scene. He's only 5'10" tall though, so small opponents would be needed, with perhaps one huge heavyset guy.
Christ-length hair
That would be Swedish Jesus.
People think Knights were short - they weren't.
In this case we have something better than skeletal remains, we have their armor. Henry VIII's armor shows him to be a strapping 6 foot, and he was considered quite tall in his time. Also, there are all those short doorways.
In yesterday's post, when I said "I looked up how tall was Jesus and saw the estimate that he was only 5'1"
I'm only five foot one, I got a pain in my neck
And I'm doing the things
A five foot one man can do...
I wish I could go home
With all the big folks
And I wish life could be
Swedish magazines
I'm only five foot one
Unless the time has come
I won't grow anymore
Anymore, anymore, anymore
'Till I'm losing my head
I'm checkin' it twice
I'm gonna find out who's naughty and nice
And I'm doing the things a five foot one man can do
I wish life could be Swedish magazines [Repeat: x3]
Kind of a "cross" between Jesus and Santa Claus?
"My Father, about 5'11", assured me, when I was young, that Jesus, being perfect, was exactly six feet tall.
Regards — Cliff
12/25/17, 8:57 AM"
That is the common belief in Appalachian folktales, because 6, in the Book of Revelation, is the human number, since Man was created on the 6th day.
Oh, and people think Napoleon was short because of deliberate British propaganda. He was average for his time. About 5'6" to 5'8" if I recall correctly.
The Bible is conspicuous in not describing any physical aspect of Christ. Il suspect it's on purpose.
One source had/has him between 5'7" and 6'2".
Amazing how much poverty has been eliminated in the last couple of hundred years.
A man 5’1” today would be quite short, but a man 5’1” in 1st Century Judea, would be average. So what?
When Jesus comes again, in power and great glory, to judge the living and the dead, I don’t think many people are going to be saying, Look at the little guy.
On hair length:
1 Corinthians 11:14: "Does not nature itself teach you that if a man wears long hair it is a disgrace for him...."
Here's that argument from Nature. How do you get that interpretation? But Paul is only asking a question. I answer his question no.
Head hair naturally grows long unless you cut it. Pubic hair is naturally short — the short hairs. If you cut head hair short, you are artificially causing it to be more like the way Nature makes pubic hair look. I'd say nature teaches that short hair (on the head) is more of a disgrace than long hair.
If you're looking for the ancient Jewish measure of perfection, use their units of measurement:
"The original measures of length were clearly derived from the human body — the finger, hand, arm, span, foot, and pace — but since these measures differ between individuals, they are reduced to a certain standard for general use. The Israelite system thus used divisions of the digit or fingerbreadth (Hebrew: אצבע, Etzba; plural etzba'ot), the palm or handbreadth (Hebrew: טפח, Tefah/Tefach; plural Tefahim/Tefachim), the span (Hebrew: זרת, Zeret), the ell (Hebrew: אמה, Amah, plural Amot), the mile (Hebrew: מיל, Mil; plural milin), and the parsa (Hebrew: פרסה, Parasa). The latter two are loan words into the Hebrew language, and borrowed measurements - the Latin mille, and Iranian parasang, respectively; both were units of itinerant distance, and thus varied according to terrain and stride length, and, in the case of the parasang, also on the speed of travel."
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Biblical_and_Talmudic_units_of_measurement#Length_and_distance
I'm always amused by people who commented on IMDB (back when it had pretty lively message boards) how actors playing various semi-historical or mythological or Biblical figures "don't look at all" like Jesus or Moses or Robin Hood or whoever. Like we have photos or contemporary descriptions of such people. I remember one guy who claimed Russell Crowe was "too old" to play Robin Hood, like he'd seen Robin's birth certificate; and another who protested the casting of a certain actress to play Queen Esther from the Old Testament because she wasn't as beautiful as the "real" Esther, like he'd seen a photo of her. I guess some people could claim Max von Sydow was "too tall" to play Jesus.
Short hair on men seems to have been the norm in both Hebrew and Roman society. One reason we know that about Hebrews is that Nazarites, people who took vows consecrating themselves to God, did not cut their hair. That's the symbolism of Samson. He let himself get into a situation where he was not acting in accordance to God's will, and therefore desecrated his vows. His long hair symbolized his commitment to God. Back to the point, if men didn't normally have short hair, then there would have been nothing special about not cutting it.
Napoleon's height, according to Wiki --
He was shorter than aristocrats or officers at 5 feet 2 inches (1.57 m). He was mocked in British newspapers as a short tempered small man.[226]
It's clever how you ask these religious questions. They are really not honest intellectual questions but ones that poke fun at and minimize Christianity. Here we are today celebrating Christmas but you minimize it , deflect from it by asking a silly diversionary question. You really don't give a damn what His height. Somewhere you developed a deep resentment and hatred for Christianity. Merry Christmas.
Modern short hair, no beard and tightly trimmed mustaches came into vogue during the first world war because it's mandatory to obtain a proper seal on a gas mask.
But we are told that Saul was unusually tall:
I Samuel 9:2: Kish had a son named Saul, as handsome a young man as could be found anywhere in Israel, and he was a head taller than anyone else.
And he went on to become the first King of Israel. Kings should be tall, I suppose.
When I as a kid the word was Jesus was exactly 6 foot tall and no other human has ever been measured at exactly that height. So there!
"Lighten up, Otto."
Note that Isaiah was written hundreds of years before Jesus lived. I don't think we can learn too much about Jesus's actual appearance from that book.
And this says Napoleon was 5'7".
http://www.todayifoundout.com/index.php/2010/03/napolean-bonaparte-having-been-short-is-a-myth/
How tall was Jesus?
As tall as he needed to be.
Note that Isaiah was written hundreds of years before Jesus lived. I don't think we can learn too much about Jesus's actual appearance from that book.
The early church (and a good portion of the current one) believed that Jesus fulfilled that prophecy. And, even if it wasn't a prophecy, the fact that they believed Jesus fulfilled it means that he conformed to it. So, logically, it can tell us something about what he looked like. Namely, that he wasn't anything special when it came to looks.
Otto, put your knife away and stop cutting off ears to defend God. Our host has, as usual, focused our attention on the salient point. Christ was not outwardly attractive or noticeable. He was not what the world judged and sought as a mover or shaker. He was despised and rejected by others. His pole numbers were always low. Knowing him or openly being associated with him wasn’t a social advantage or a financial benefit. He would have been trashed on Facebook and in the comment section of all the blogs.
That's the spirit, Otto!
People think Napoleon was short - he wasn't. People think Knights were short - they weren’t.
I heard that Pepin the Short wasn't even short.
The knights were big. It's the armor that got small.
@Qualyle Love,giving, peace, grace, mercy and salvation are the salient points, not whether He was rejected or how tall He was.
Merry Christmas.
"He stood 6 foot 6 and weighed 245, kinda broad at the shoulder and narrow at the hip and everybody knew you didn't give no lip to Big... Jesus."
Big Bad John-Jimmy Dean
He wasn't allowed on the rollercoaster at Six Flags over Jerusalem until he was 21.
I don't know about Biblical times, but, in the 20th century, leaders of mass movements were surprisingly ordinary looking. Lenin, Stalin, Mao, and Hitler--there's nothing inspirational about their looks. There isn't one of them that Jason Stratham wouldn't be able to body slam. . Mussolini did look Imposing , but he was small potatoes so far as mass movements go........On the western side, the record is better. FDR was tall and good looking-- although during his greatest years he was wheelchair bound and looked half dead. Churchill was rotund and jowly, but he had a dramatic presence. DeGaulle, Patton, MacArthur could all credibly involve the world in their dreams of glory.......They say looks are superficial, but maybe not.
I never found the reference any where else but Manly Wade Wellman who researched the folklore of the Appalachians repeats the idea that Jesus is exactly six feet tall and no man other than he is exactly six feet tall.
At least no one has yet asked if he was hung.
Richelieu was tall.
How tall was Jesus?
As tall as Althouse thinks he was based on her current mood and the point she is making. Obviously.
Althouse @ 9:26am,
Good grief, Paul is asking a rhetorical question.
"..if he was hung...." Mission accomplished Ann. Smart girl.
The Greek Orthodox church in Tacoma has the most amazing Jesus on the ceiling of the dome of the church. I was there for the Greek Festival attending a lecture on the building's architecture - I looked up and there he was, GQ Jesus looking down at me: square manly jaw, large deep eyes, flowing hair. GQ Jesus is, I estimate, at least 6'4".
"use their units of measurement"
Statistics say maybe 3.5 cubits (5'3"), but 4 cubits (6'2"), why not, he's the Son of God for heaven's sake.
BTW, do you suppose that "Hey, Jesu, how's the weather up there" could be both literal and figurative?
Merry Christmas, and thanks for the gift of your blog.
Sorry, 4 cubits is 6' exactly, just perfect.
Christ was a man among men, whose character (e.g. principles) preceded the "color of his skin". So, there is no cause to believe that he was visually distinct from the people in his community. In fact, if men were judged by their physical stature, and they were, they are, too tall or too short would likely distract from his message. So, what is God's choice?
If the Shroud of Turin is Christ's burial wrapping, the image indicates that Jesus Christ was in the range of 5 feet 7 to 6 feet 2.
Jesus wasn't hung. He was crucified.
I can hardly wait for Althouse' gently satirical post during Ramadan, speculating on what the Prophet Mohammed actually looked like. Her artistic skills will come in handy.
In the season of joy, we spend time with our families, we renew the bonds of love and goodwill between our citizens and most importantly we celebrate the miracle of Christmas.
For Christians we remember the story of Jesus, Mary and Joseph that began more than 2,000 years ago. As the book of Isaiah tells us, for to us a child is born, to us a son is given and the government will be on his shoulders and he will be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.
This good news is the greatest Christmas gift of all, the reason for our joy and the true source of our hope.
One of Trump's Christmas messages, specifically targeting Chuck whirling neurons
.
If "the government will be on his shoulders"--as Isaiah says, would God want those shoulders close to the soil and mud? I think not.
"Jesus wasn't hung." That's not what Mary Magdalene said! Heigh-yo!!!
http://greatshroudofturinfaq.com/Science/Image/height.html says he's 5'8" or so.
I was raised to believe that Jesus was the quarterback of the football. So if the average guy was 5'1", then Jesus would be a bit taller. Probably my height, 5'7'. Just makes sense.
I can hardly wait for Althouse' gently satirical post during Ramadan, speculating on what the Prophet Mohammed actually looked like. Her artistic skills will come in handy.
That makes two of us, Rob. Not gonna hold my breath, though....
I'm quite devout and this conversation does not bother me. Ok, maybe the hung cracks are too much. But I can just roll my eyes at that.
So you are serious about this perfect 6ft tall thing? I have never heard of this.
You could read up on the Shroud of Turin if you want more evidence. (He was 5' 11'', according to scientists who've studied the Shroud.)
Yancey Ward said...
At least no one has yet asked if he was hung.
12/25/17, 11:48 AM
Why no, Yancey, I heard he was crucified.
(You see, William, if you tell it that way, you avoid joining in the error of hung vs. hanged.)
ALP,
That building is truly wonderful! Though I will add that Orthodox churches in general (along with their buddies the Oriental Orthodox and the Eastern Catholics) go in for that sort of thing as being important to worship, so it's not uncommon to find in churches.
One of my nieces got married in a Greek Melkite Catholic church on the east coast, and if anything it was more elaborate than the Tacoma church.
Measure the imprint on the shroud. Easy-peasy.
Short people avoid saying that somebody is a tall man, lest people wonder what a short person considers tall.
And "tall men" never stop reminding everyone they are tall. We've heard of the "Napoleon complex" - but we never hear of the "De Gaulle Complex" or as its known in the 21st century the "James Comey Complex" that Tall men are born to rule.
I've met more men over 6/5 on the internet then seems humanly possible. I wonder why?
As someone who's exactly median height, 5/10, I laugh at both the shorties and giraffes. We all don't share your height Complex. Get a life.
The only thing I made fun of is the bad writing in the NYT.
I think it’s a serious question how we visualize Jesus, and I think the ways we get it wrong matter.
I also regard it as a serious question whether it’s wrong to ask the question what Jesus looked like and to speculate about whether God would choose to be tall (and in other ways above average) as He enters human life.
I think it’s sort of embarrassing to realize that you want Jesus to look like someone a woman today would want to date.
The NT tells us everything we need to know about Christ. If it does not describe his height, it is because it is not important.
This is my third time trying this.
Jesus died in Japan.
https://www.smithsonianmag.com/history/the-little-known-legend-of-jesus-in-japan-165354242/
The NT tells us everything we need to know about Christ. If it does not describe his height, it is because it is not important.
Lewis, both the Old and New Testaments tell us all we need to know about Christ.
Speaking from a Jewish perspective, there's an inherent problem with any religion in which your deity appears in human form: Whatever form he (or she) assumes becomes inherently more holy than other forms. Jesus chose to be a man, so men must somehow be better than women. Jesus chose to be a Hebrew, so Hebrews must somehow be better. (We do believe we're the chosen people, but that isn't because we're any better than anybody else). Jesus chose to be short, so short people are better than tall people (upending the societal preference for tallness).
In short (pun intended), you lose some of the universality of your religion.
Height is partly genetic, but also depends one one's nutrition as a child: so here in Asia, the young folks are no longer short. Blame KFC.
Jesus was brought up in Egypt (probably Alexandria) so the average height in the Jewish community there would be a better way to estimate his height than those in Israel.
And even if he was "short", he was a carpenter (read construction worker, for back then, as today, a lot of carpenters worked on buildings). So he wasn't a wimp.
As for the long hair: that is based on the "Jesus was a Nazarene" mistake: Nazarene oathtakers didn't cut their hair, but Jesus wasn't one: he was merely brought up in Nazareth.
we (or rather our artists) tend to see Jesus in our own image.
An ancient picture in the catecombs show Jesus as a short haired unbearded shepherd. The Jesus icon in one Apache church sees him as the warrior who protects women and children, the Byzantine icon sees Jesus as the king, and we westerners see him as wimpy and effeminite. Go figure.
Here is the Manly Wade Wellman story that discussed the height of Jesus. Without doing further research myself, apparently it's believed among the mountain people that Wellman wrote about that Jesus was exactly 6 feet tall, and that no one else has ever been that exact height after him.
"Jesus was a Nazarene" mistake: Nazarene oathtakers didn't cut their hair, but Jesus wasn't one: he was merely brought up in Nazareth.
Nazarene and Nazirite [or Nazarite] are two different things, hence the confusion. Nazirites were those who took the vow to leave their hair uncut.
Satan was the one who was going to be highly attractive.
Satan was the one who was going to be highly attractive.
Yes, the Bible mentions this fact in both OT and NT.
I think it’s sort of embarrassing to realize that you want Jesus to look like someone a woman today would want to date.
We call this Maybeline Jesus in our family.
We call this Maybeline
TTR made that prayer his bitch.
"At least no one has yet asked if he was hung."
Well Yancy, I hate to burst your whatever but, yes, they have asked how hung we was.
Painter had to deal this with this issue. I learned about this, I thought here at Althouse (some years back) but it could have been instapundit.
Anyway...
http://wtfarthistory.com/post/4899542614/resurrection-erection
http://wtfarthistory.com/post/5335084402/resurrection-erection-again
Merry Christmas!
If you read the story of Zaccacheus, it says he was short. However, due to the wording of the story, it is not clear who was short. Many people believe it is Zaccacheus, but this cannot be inferred from the meaning of the greek.
Thanks, SDN.
Regards — Cliff
Me:The NT tells us everything we need to know about Christ. If it does not describe his height, it is because it is not important.
Mockturtle:
Lewis, both the Old and New Testaments tell us all we need to know about Christ.
Yes. But. There are Hebrew scholars who believe the KJV translation of the Old Testament overstates the concordance between the OT and the NT. I am afraid that taking a strong stand on either side of that divide is harmful and not really illuminating. I feel that the OT understanding of the world men lived in was as foreign to Christianity as the pagan world of the Greeks and Romans. The New Testament really was a New Testament. I suppose that what I am saying is that it easier to see the NT as a refutation of the OT rather than its successor.
It's not about height; it's about stature.
Lewis, Jesus quoted Isaiah and other OT prophets to reveal His fulfillment of their prophecies. The entire OT points to a Messiah, either in illustration or in type.
Submitted for your edification and amusement.
What did Jesus really look like?
rcocean said...
"Did Jesus have 6 pack abs? How much could he bench press?"
Most carpenters are pretty strong and wiry; especially the ones who don't use power tools.
5 ft 8 in on the Shroud of Turin
Superficial image interpretations of the physical Jesus does not effect belief in God.
Based on the pics I've always seen, blue-eyed blond-haired Jesus was about 5' 11".
There is a film based on the Gospel of John that portrays the chief Pharisee as a tall guy and Jesus as a little guy. I loved that they had Jesus get in the face of a guy about a foot taller than him, unflinching, no fear.
My guess is that he was tall enough for his feet to reach the ground.
The question should read "How Tall IS Jesus?"
He is risen. He is risen indeed!!
This is one of those questions that are totally meaningless. In the Star Wars movies we have a Jedi master - Joda - who's an ancient, rheumatic runt. How tall is a Jedi?
Clickbait.
This is one of those questions that are totally meaningless. In the Star Wars movies we have a Jedi master - Joda - who's an ancient, rheumatic runt. How tall is a Jedi?
Clickbait.
19”
6 pounds 4 oz
"As soon as I get out of this manger I'm going to start working out and dieting. I need to get really lean and ripped for . . . well, you know . . . the thing. . . ."
Stevie Griffin as Baby Jesus on FAMILY GUY
I meant of course Stewie Griffin.
In the account of Jesus's arrest in Chapter 18 of John when Judas and the detachment of soldiers approached, Jesus asked who it was they wanted. The soldiers fell back and to the ground. This part of the Gospel always puzzled me , but perhaps we can surmise that Jesus intimidated the multiple soldiers sent to arrest Him. We can support this theory by taking the average height of men in that day (apparently 5'1") and the physical evidence of the Shroud of Turin (six feet, give or take an inch or two), Given how He also threw the money changers out of the Temple (who would have probably resisted His efforts), I think it is reasonable to suppose that Jesus, with His many gifts, was also a badass.
Put me in for six feet.
Reminds me of an old joke:
Jim decided to propose to Sandy, but prior to her acceptance. Sandy had to confess to her man about her childhood illness. She informed Jim that she suffered from a disease that left her breasts at the maturity level of a 12 year old. He stated that it was OK because he loved her so much. “I too have a problem. My penis is the same size as an infant and I hope you could deal with that once we are married.” She said, “Yes I will marry you and learn to live with your infant penis.” Sandy and Jim got married and they could not wait so Jim whisked Sandy off to their hotel suite and they started to touch ,tease and hold one another. As Sandy put her hands in Jim’s pants, she began to scream and ran out of the room! Jim ran after her to find out what was wrong. She said, “You told me your penis was the size of an infant!” “Yes it is: 8 pounds, 7 ounces, 19 inches long!”
Source: http://lazer1033.com/moose/dirty-joke-infant-sized-shlong/
Nicely reasoned, Ms. Althouse. But...
The broader question is whose genes did Jesus have? After all, human height is about 70% genetic. More interestingly, whose Y-chromosome did Jesus have.
Nearly every human biological male has an XY chromosomal pair while nearly every human biological female has an XX chromosomal pair for the human allosome. The Y for human males is carried only by sperm: every egg contains an allosomal X. Basically if the sperm contains an X, the fertilized egg will be XX and thus develop into a biological female while if the sperm contains a Y, the fertilized egg will be XY and develop into a biological male.
Jesus had an XY allosome because of a beard, lack of fallopian tubes, and lots of binary gender identification as a dude. He got the X from Mary because every egg has an X allosome. But... whose Y-chromosome did Jesus get?
Not God's unless you take "in our image" so literally that you believe that Yahweh has 23 chromosomal pairs in each of its cells... is literally a Male/Father/King with guy junk, nipples but no breast development, facial hair, testosterone-induced love of pickup trucks, and so on.
Not Joseph's because "born of a virgin." However, the New Testament provides Joe's genealogy back to David. Why isn't really explained because ... "born of a virgin" and all. But David's Y-chromosome is presumably one of the versions of Haplogroup J, the predominant Jewish Y-allosome Haplogroup.
So a custom-designed Y-chromosome... Yahweh the gene-builder put the Y-chromosome together base-pair by base-pair to create its "Son?" Well... that's kind of silly because the other 45 chromosomes are just plain old, run-of-the-mill, off the shelf human DNA. Specifically the DNA of Jewish males of the time. Jesus didn't have purple hair, or 3 arms, or nail-resistant skin, after all. So... the whole "custom-designed Y-chromosome" doesn't make much sense either.
Or... religions are scams. Not "born of a virgin" and Joseph or someone Mary liked better was the baby-daddy and Jesus had his Y-chromosome.
Pretty sure that if the length of Jesus' hair or his height were of any use to a Christian today, Luke would've told us.
Jesus was just an average Yeshua.
It wasn't important what he looked like. People followed him for what he said and did not for what he looked like.
He was nothing special to look at.
Jesus was an average person. He was a hard worker (timmerman ) and not ladylike, like most pictures.He spend many hours outside working. He was strong enough to chase people out of the temple of God. His hair was short(1 Cor 11:14 ).
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