But surely that can't be the worst excuse in the history of the world. If you're going to pick apart other people's rhetoric, you ought to resist deploying superlatives. They are
Maybe she should have written: Worst. Excuse. Ever.
Just kidding. I'm so glad that people have gotten over writing like that. I think they have anyway. And perhaps Rubin's headline is a vestige of that obsolete humor form.
Anyway, I wonder what actually was the worst excuse ever.
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"I forgot".
NO, I think Rumsfeld's You go to war with the army you have, not the army you wish you had. Is one of the worst excuses ever.
But at least it wasn't like Jay Carney's blather trying to tell us that Blue is Yellow. You can tell just how much the media is in the tank for this administration because Carney assumed that the junk he dropped at that press conference would actually fly. Didn't even try to come up with good excuse
We might need a definition for excuse.
Worst ever?
"Am I my brother's keeper?"
No. Rumsfeld was stating a fact of life.
"Anyway, I wonder what actually was the worst excuse ever."
The funny thing about really bad excuses is the very worst ones tend to be true. With that in mind, Sam Kinison proposes:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DSwG9Tojg9I
It's more like the lamest misdirection ever. Worst excuse is probably, "Was I speeding? Without my glasses I can't hardly see the speedometer."
Nero blaming the Christians for fire in Rome was pretty bad. For the Christians and for Nero (and for Rome).
I think Nathan Thurm offered some of the best worst excuses ever. Here is "Mike Wallace" grilling him over his client's defective woopie cushions
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wc2o8ywKqos
"Anyway, I wonder what actually was the worst excuse ever."
It's the form of the (implied) question rather than any possible answer that is interesting. The question is about rankings, and implies that there is some commonly accepted way of measuring competing answers to figure out the relative rankings. But there isn't any such measure, let alone an accepted way to apply it, and except in controlled scientific experiments, never is. Most people understand that intuitively. What is really strange is that, despite understanding that best/worst rankings are invariably nonsensical, those rankings (almost any ranking) still exercise enormous power over people's choices. The US World rankings are an obvious example, but so are many of the supposedly more objective ones (Consumer Reports, those kinds of things).
I suppose it's just an example of the power of numbers to mesmerize and hypnotize. It's a modern-day gnosticism.
I didn't see any similar superlatives in the article itself, so my guess would be that the headline was written by someone other than Rubin.
I was just following orders.
Genesis 3:12. "The man answered, "That woman, the one you gave me, gave me some fruit from the tree, and I ate it."
The first excuse.
Trey
Worst ever? "Oh, you meant don't eat THOSE apples?!?"
The excuse was "we were lying to protect the President's re-election" which is something I find nothing funny about. Nor that it involved four dead Americans. Nor that many people don't care because the result was ok with them. Nor that the most likely person to be elected the next president probably played some part.
No its not funny, trivial, or something I can wonder about. I don't care how its written about, talked about. We were lied to and are still being lied to.
I give "oral sex isn't sex" pretty high marks.
"While checking him into prison, officers were surprised to discover nine grams of marijuana wrapped around Mr Williams's penis, presumably because he'd run out of pockets earlier in the day. This erotic and untimely discovery, by the way, upgraded the charges against him from "having drugs" to "attempting to smuggle drugs into prison." At which point John unsheathed his megavillian brain and masterful oratory skills by assuring those present that the whole situation was just a misunderstanding."
"A man on trial for murder in San Antonio claims he shot and killed another man in self-defense after being threatened and teased about his resemblance to pop star Lance Bass."
"I lost it in the sun"
Brooklyn pitcher Billy Loes after muffing a ground ball in a World Series game.
RecChief said...
NO, I think Rumsfeld's You go to war with the army you have, not the army you wish you had. Is one of the worst excuses ever.
Totally incorrect.
Rumsfeld was not offering an excuse, but simply relating an known real-world fact of life.
You go to war with the military you have, not the one you wish you had.
No plan survives first contact with the enemy.
There are things that are known, known unknowns, and unknown unknowns.
These are basic axioms for any and all military/ business/strategic planners.
"Have you ever *met* a proctologist? Well, they usually have a very good sense of humor. You meet a proctologist at a party, don't walk away. *Plant* yourself there, because you will hear the funniest stories you've ever heard. See, no one wants to admit to them that they *stuck* something up there. Never! It's always an accident. Every proctologist story ends in the same way: 'It was a million to one shot, Doc. Million to one.'"
SteveR said...No its not funny, trivial, or something I can wonder about. I don't care how its written about, talked about. We were lied to and are still being lied to.
SteveR is absolutely right, but an old man that owns a BB team is RACIST!!! is more important to the rest of America
Perhaps it's just the worst excuse ever so far in this matter. Carney's latest obfuscation does take the cake so far as to be distasteful.
Genesis 3:13. "Bitch set me up."
The twinkie made me do it.
"Oh I thought the sign I 95 meant the speed limit ...glad you didn't catch me over on SR 210 earlier.."
Ask my parents. If only you could.
I wonder what actually was the worst excuse ever.
The dog ate my Benghazi emails.
I looked at Carney today and I actually had pity for him. He's trying to defend/defuse the indefensible.
He's in the position of a criminal law attorney asking the judge for sentencing leniency because his convicted client is an orphan. But the client is an orphan because he murdered both of his parents.
But as long as we're going with the "worst excuse ever", I'll nominate William Jefferson Clinton looking straight into the eye of the camera (and by extension into the eyes of millions of American citizens) and saying "I Did Not Have Sex With That Woman."
Ask the wives of America what they think of that excuse when their husband comes home after getting a BJ from a prostitute.
Can't help but think of the anti-war protester in "Forrest Gump" who blames his striking Jenny on LBJ and "this damn war".
Come to think of it, that's a pretty accurate portrayal of left-wing thought regarding culpability/blame for personal actions.
My wife left me for a cop. I thought you were bringing her back.
Ann Althouse said...
"Have you ever *met* a proctologist?... "
Maybe Carney could have come up with a better excuse. We just now found the document and you won't believe where it was. It was a million to one shot!
I don't know about the worst, but this is the best!
You voted for him, Ann, when it was obvious during his first campaign what a liar and cover-upper he was.
Remind your fair readers what your excuse for supporting candidate Obama in 2008 was...
I learned a new term today, Casus Belli, which is a term for the pretense (an excuse) for one nation to go to war with another. For example, Russia is looking for a Casus Belli for invading the Ukraine.
A friend of mine owns and operates a hotel in Southern California. One fine morning he goes out for an early jog and upon returning passes by the loading dock to discover the General Manager heaving packages of steaks to his Food and Beverage Manager. He summons the GM to his office in an hour's time and fires the GM on the spot. And the GM's response:
"Anybody can make a mistake."
An early whiff of the 21st Century.
If you want to get all metaphysical, the worst excuse, ever, is probably "free will".
Eddie Murphy's excuse when caught with the male cross-dressing prostitute would qualify for consideration.
Also qualifying would be the hypothetical man who said "It wasn't me" in Eddie Murphy's "Raw". (paraphrasing: Yes. Yes. I fucked her. But I make love to you. And if you let one fuck get in the way of our love, there's something really wrong here, baby.)
Right on, Curious George. Jake's list of excuses was the first thing I thought of.
What difference, at this point, does it make?
Re: Have you ever *met* a proctologist?
Classic joke:
Q: What is a Pokemon?
A: A Jamaican proctologist.
haha, Racist is disparate impact of racist recruiting practices on NBA Teams. There needs to be 70% white boys :)
I never thought I would see a link from Althouse to cracked.com. I think I still have a couple of Cracked magazines from the late 60's.
Any excuse that is a lie.
"The woman that you gave to me made me do it," is an accused man's first ever excuse. It already contains the crafty implication that a __________ is not a real human.
Men fill in the blank with a woman, or a southerner, or a black person, or a Midwestener, or a savage, or that all time favorite, a Jewish Banker.
I screwed up baby, but you know, when I screwed up I was high, And baby when you're high it don't count.
Nonapod: " For example, Russia is looking for a Casus Belli for invading the Ukraine.
No, Russia is not looking for a Casus Belli, they are busy constructing one.
With obama providing all the "flexibility" to his boyfriend in the Kremlin that the Russians need to complete their task.
Much overused these days, the construction: "Does X do Y? Not so much."
http://www.bing.com/news/search?q=%22not+so+much%22&qs=n&form=NWBQBN&pq=%22not+so+much%22&sc=8-13&sp=-1&sk=
to all you jokers telling me that Rumsfeld wasn't offering an excuse, you can all go to hell. I was there. Yeah, soft skin HMMWVs with leatherette doors are fucking fantastic for stopping 7.62x39 rounds. not even the fiberglass doors from teh first iteration. When did he say it, December 2004? a full 20 months after the initial invasion. And last I looked, we chose the date of the invasion, it's not like we were repelling a sneak attack. Hillbilly armor was still being welded on HMMWVs in mid 2005.
Not to mention the lack of forethought and intelligence (as in intelligence gathering) about what was going to happen after the initial invasion. As much as I thought we did good for the people of Iraq if we could have stayed, and I still think we were right to go in, a bunch of monday morning quarterbacks telling me that no, Rummy Was Right simply because admitting your party made mistakes while in power is unthinkable makes me want to say Fuck You
I don't really recall -- did Sandy Berger even try to offer an excuse? Feet got cold and needed extra insulation? Left his orthotics at home and was trying to improvise a replacement?
No, no.
The worst excuse in history was from Scipio after losing two full Roman armies to Hannibal at the Battle Of Trebia. When Rome demanded an explanation, Scipio said, "Because elephants."
The worst excuse ever is in Genesis 32:
The Golden Calf
32 When the people saw that Moses delayed to come down from the mountain, the people gathered themselves together to Aaron and said to him, “Up, make us gods who shall go before us. As for this Moses, the man who brought us up out of the land of Egypt, we do not know what has become of him.” 2 So Aaron said to them, “Take off the rings of gold that are in the ears of your wives, your sons, and your daughters, and bring them to me.” 3 So all the people took off the rings of gold that were in their ears and brought them to Aaron. 4 And he received the gold from their hand and fashioned it with a graving tool and made a golden[a] calf. And they said, “These are your gods, O Israel, who brought you up out of the land of Egypt!” 5 When Aaron saw this, he built an altar before it. And Aaron made a proclamation and said, “Tomorrow shall be a feast to the Lord.” 6 And they rose up early the next day and offered burnt offerings and brought peace offerings. And the people sat down to eat and drink and rose up to play.
7 And the Lord said to Moses, “Go down, for your people, whom you brought up out of the land of Egypt, have corrupted themselves. 8 They have turned aside quickly out of the way that I commanded them. They have made for themselves a golden calf and have worshiped it and sacrificed to it and said, ‘These are your gods, O Israel, who brought you up out of the land of Egypt!’”
...
.” 19 And as soon as he came near the camp and saw the calf and the dancing, Moses' anger burned hot, and he threw the tablets out of his hands and broke them at the foot of the mountain. 20 He took the calf that they had made and burned it with fire and ground it to powder and scattered it on the water and made the people of Israel drink it.
21 And Moses said to Aaron, “What did this people do to you that you have brought such a great sin upon them?” 22 And Aaron said, “Let not the anger of my lord burn hot. You know the people, that they are set on evil. 23 For they said to me, ‘Make us gods who shall go before us. As for this Moses, the man who brought us up out of the land of Egypt, we do not know what has become of him.’ 24 So I said to them, ‘Let any who have gold take it off.’ So they gave it to me, and I threw it into the fire, and out came this calf.”
That is my favorite excuse. Ever.
"As much as I thought we did good for the people of Iraq if we could have stayed, and I still think we were right to go in, a bunch of monday morning quarterbacks telling me that no, Rummy Was Right simply because admitting your party made mistakes while in power is unthinkable makes me want to say Fuck You"
Fair enough. Now - back to where we are at this particular moment in history: the political coverup of the terrorist attack on our embassy in Libya is clearly coming apart. Even the NYT and Washington Post are dropping out of coverup as the information is finally coming free.
What is the full extent of knowledge the President and the Secretary of State had? Exactly when did they have that knowledge? Do we the American people excuse their actions or do we not? And if we do excuse them, are we still really self-governing Americans or have we become something else?
What is the full extent of knowledge the President and the Secretary of State had? Exactly when did they have that knowledge? Do we the American people excuse their actions or do we not? And if we do excuse them, are we still really self-governing Americans or have we become something else?
Something else, people like free stuff, even from liars and frauds.
If Democrats stick with the current Pelosi stand -- "Benghazi, Benghazi, Benghazi. Why aren’t we talking about something else?" -- nothing will happen.
Actually, I wonder what actually was the worst excuse ever.
Could it be any one of these?
"Because I could."
What is the full extent of knowledge the President and the Secretary of State had? Exactly when did they have that knowledge? Do we the American people excuse their actions or do we not? And if we do excuse them, are we still really self-governing Americans or have we become something else?
Meade - I agree, those are questions that must be answered. And some of us have been asking them for over a year and a half. The leftists, and other obama protectors/defenders, do want to excuse the administration's actions. Those include a number of the people sitting at that press conference, and it says a lot that Carney didn't think he had to come up with a better explanation, that whatever he said, those in the press would believe him. In one sense, Obama succeeded in transforming this country, because, in my opinion, the majority of the populace just wants to go back to their "reality" TV shows and wings or back to their arugula and ironic PBR. Either way, they don't want to recognize what is changing in this country. And not all change is progress, or even good.
simple-the locals wanted christ killed
RecChief said...
to all you jokers telling me that Rumsfeld wasn't offering an excuse, you can all go to hell.
You can go right to hell along with those you condemn.
Mark Nielsen said...
I don't really recall -- did Sandy Berger even try to offer an excuse?
He didn't need to.
Narratives. Lefty media.
You know the drill.
RecChief: "Not to mention the lack of forethought and intelligence (as in intelligence gathering) about what was going to happen after the initial invasion."
Read up on the invasion of Normandy and the armored advance thru the low countries if you get a chance there Rocketeer.
"She came on to me. And how was I to know she was your mother?"
A little hyperbole from Rubin is a welcome relief from the outright lying we usually see from the WaPo.
Worst Excuse Ever? I vote for, "She told me she was eighteen."
Five years from now, during the first trimester of President Hillary/McCaskill/Gillibrand's administration, the worst excuse might go something like this:
"Yes, I did get the sexual consent form signed by both parties. Yes, I did transmit the form to the Dean of Women's Studies office 72 hours prior to engagement. No, I didn't have it notarized."
The man said, "The woman you put here with me--she gave me some fruit from the tree, and I ate it."
Chillblaine,
Do you honestly think Hillary! will forgive McCaskill for her earlier than almost everyone else endorsement of Obama?
I've said it before. Claire stuck her neck out earlier to endorse Obama than just about anyone else and I'm still looking to see what she got in return. Doubly scary since you'd think endorsing the anointed woman would be the safe bet for her.
She won reelection on her sly playing of the Republican primary no thanks to Obama. So what did she, and we in MO, get for her pandering to the O.
Worst excuse ever? How about "I thought Priam would like it if we brought the pretty wooden horsey inside the gates."
That's what I said to Aeneas as the two of were running like Hell from the burning city of Troy.
Excuse most clearly indicating that all the president's men are out of plausible excuses. I never thought they would run out of lies but it seems they have.
72 comments and not a single "Sorry Mr Hand. Just couldn't make it on time." ?
"It seemed like a good idea at the time," is definitely a contender.
Read up on the invasion of Normandy and the armored advance thru the low countries if you get a chance there Rocketeer.
While your second and third points are true, the first is only true in some cases, Perhaps not in the case of a year long buildup.
Actually, I wrote several papers in college and Army resident courses specifically on the subject of the invasion and follow-on operations in Normandy and Operation Market Garden. The failure to note the challenges of having a one tank front while advancing through the low countries is one of my favorite examples of GFI (Great Fucking Idea) in military history. I had the benefit of 1st person interviews with people on the ground by benefit of interviewing my grandfather and others at their Regimental and Division gatherings. 4 combat jumps. Look it up you well-read genius you.
If you really want to read up on DoD failures, read up on the current controversy and back story concerning DCGS-A and Palantir. Then you can tell me all about going to war with what you have vs. what you wish you had.
Amazing how nothing was learned from a war 60 years earlier. Or less than 10 yrs ago.
If you can't recognize failures from your own side, you're bound to experience the same hubris as the current administration.
Good to hook, Rocketeer?
RecChief, it sounds like you've been there and done that. (By any chance you never knew Jon Weaver did you?) Anyway. I liked Bush and many of his people, Rumsfeld and Cheney not excepted.
Mistakes were made, but I disagree that the answer was armor and more armor. The difference should have been made up in TTP. Sticking to roads was unwise and armor would have made the HMMWV no nimbler. there was also the Turkish betrayal in the north. A number of things didn't go so great.
If UAVs had been a little more mature it would've helped. You see these little quadcopters, if there was one on point, or half a dozen in every convoy I bet casualties would have been cut in half. You don't learn except by doing. I don't remember World War 2 relying on encasing jeeps in armor. if the only way the enemy can kill you use to wait for you to drive by his land mine and blow you up, stop driving by his land mines.
Anyway, and I do not mean to be blithe, its all woulda coulda shoulda at this point. You can't go back. And you know...what I would have done I don't think anybody else would have done. Imagine if we had got OBL somehow at Tora Bora, or at any time.
I think I agree with someone above that Bush's greatest mistake was being too nice and thinking too highly of the Arabs. Oderint dum metuant.
Tell me, in your studies, did either you or any of your comrades come up with any really good choice answers to the problems? I'm guessing no?
Finally, after all the time and lives and pain and money, we scratched out a win. Then Obama snatches defeat out of the jaws of victory. You can blame Bush for things, I think he blames himself, but if you're for real I think that you have to despise Obama a thousand times more, agree or disagree?
Also RC, while the responsibility lies at the top, do you think the military advice Bush and below him Rumsfeld got, the leadership of his generals, the professional military, was really flawless? Any lessons to be learned there?
@nichevo -
we can argue about a lot of things related to the Iraq war. some of which I suspect you and I (and Drago) would agree upon. Yes, there were a whole host of problems, tactical decisions, we could discuss, but where to begin. In fact, I agree with a number of your points. Actually, in my studies, singly and in a group come up with a solution, but no one would have had the political will to implement it.
My problem was and is still connected to the blithe manner that Rumsfeld used, coupled with the long lead time in implementing even a half baked solution.
It's still a sore subject with me. for personal reasons.
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