January 19, 2017

"We don't want your tiny hands/Anywhere near our underpants/We don't want your tiny hands/Anywhere near our underpants..."

A very minimal anti-Trump song by Fiona Apple gets an article of its own in The New York Times.

ADDED: I was glad to have a chance once again to use my underpants tag.  I hadn't used it since March 1st of last year. Oddly enough, the post was about Trump. I was linking to something in the NYT, something tragically titled "Inside the Clinton Team’s Plan to Defeat Donald Trump":
“They’ll flip their top, and they’ll flip their panties...” read the subject line of a recent news release from Emily’s List, a group that works to elect Democratic women who support abortion rights. The quote came from comments Mr. Trump made about women on “The Howard Stern Show” in the 1990s, unearthed by BuzzFeed last month.

Those types of comments, spoken by Mr. Trump over the years as he served as a tabloid regular and reality TV star, could help Mrs. Clinton excite suburban women and young women who have been ambivalent or antagonistic toward her candidacy....
The excited suburban and young women will need to content themselves with the women's march. Apple's tiny-hands-underpants song is intended to be chanted by the marching women.

Before that, there was a Jeb Bush interview in February 2015:
When Hannity said he had one more question, Jeb said "boxers." (Bill Clinton's answer to the famously inappropriate question, by the way, was "Usually briefs. I can't believe she did that." Obama's answer was:  "I don't answer those humiliating questions. But whichever one it is, I look good in 'em.")
And remember that sculpture of a man stumbling about in his underpants that disturbed the women of Wellesley College?

And all the posts about Anthony Weiner's underpants? And references to the underpants gnomes? There was the underpants bomber.

And there was the time The Gatsby Project — should I bring back The Gatsby Project? — got to a sentence with underpants:
The prolonged and tumultuous argument that ended by herding us into that room eludes me, though I have a sharp physical memory that, in the course of it, my underwear kept climbing like a damp snake around my legs and intermittent beads of sweat raced cool across my back.
And "Hey, look! It's my giant underpants!"



ALSO: I do want to give Fiona Apple credit for inventing a new chant. "We don't want your tiny hands/Anywhere near our underpants" really is chantable. I'd like to see marches with new chants. I'm really tired of the continual repurposing of: 1. "What do we want?/X!/When do we want it?/Now!" and "Hey, hey, ho, ho/X has got to go." (The Wisconsin protests of 2011 were notable for their distinctive chants: "What's Disgusting?/Union busting" and "This is what democracy looks like.")

87 comments:

Known Unknown said...

Fiona's window of somewhat-tantalizing-because-she-probably-cuts-herself-mental-freakness has closed. Nice try.

sparrow said...

She looks anorexic from the photo

wendybar said...

Bahahahaha!! Really?? That's what she thinks is a good song?? I used to have hope for her, but I think the drugs screwed up her brain.

Scott said...

I sit in rapt attention to the deep thoughts expressed by actors and musicians.

bagoh20 said...

The enormity of her talent is demonstrated with this magnum opus of concise originality and creativity. I simply must hear more from her. The tug at my soul is overpowering. At least that's what my mangina is telling me.

n.n said...

Observation, orientation, behavior, or exposure?

Losing your liberal culture. No Judgment.

Mac McConnell said...

Fiona Apple is still alive?

cassandra lite said...

Reminds me of the Stones' unintentionally hilarious "Sweet Neo Con." (If they'd had any wit, they'd have called it My Sweet Neocon. Of course, if they'd had any wit, they wouldn't have recorded "Sweet Neo Con.)

Fernandinande said...

Mac McConnell said...
Fiona Apple is still alive?


I'm pretty sure I would've heard of her if she were dead.

Bay Area Guy said...


""We don't want your tiny hands/Anywhere near our underpants/We don't want your tiny hands/Anywhere near our underpants...""


It's not exactly true though -- seems like a lotta females did want Trump's hands near their underpants. Many women dig tall guys.

rehajm said...

I suspect the demands of the song will happily be met.

Now, if she wrote a song demanding government fund Planned Parenthood...

MadisonMan said...

Likelihood of that actually happening to Fiona Apple? Zero.

Unknown said...

So it is okay to talk about a man's sexual bits, but not females? Right..

This must the the NYTimes new committment to "real news". That lasted about a microsecond.

Fake news, fake media outlet. To be honest I would never know what they said if Dr. Althouse did not note it.

traditionalguy said...

She is playing hard to get. Smart move.

Kelly said...

I'd rather have insulting songs written about a President than songs of praise and worship.

JAORE said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Kelly said...

I'd rather have insulting songs written about a President than songs of praise and worship.

Lyle said...

Trump knows to get permission. He only grabs if they let him. Yes means Yes.

Brando said...

"Hands" doesn't rhyme with "underpants"!

Well if Trump can bring Fiona Apple's career back from the dead, maybe he can save other moribund industries.

Mary Beth said...

Many women dig tall guys.

And don't completely dislike billionaires.

Chest Rockwell said...

I was at the Food Co-Op in the Peoples Republic of Ann Arbor yesterday, where a customer and cashier were engaged in a passionate discussion about the women's march this Saturday. Both agreed they had to attend to defend women against Trump, as well as American democracy against fascism, but simply couldn't attend because they both had to work on Friday.

Oh well! Maybe next year!

Fernandinande said...

Chest Rockwell said...
but simply couldn't attend because they both had to work on Friday.


That reminds me of the guy whose plans for world domination were coming along nicely until his wife found out about it.

William Chadwick said...

Yet they bend'em and spread 'em for Big Brother.

Merny11 said...

This is their chant? Seriously? Oh yeah, that will get people to jump on their bandwagon.

DanTheMan said...

Did I mention that I saw London, and I saw France?

TwilightofLiberty.com said...

I'm super excited for the Women's March, alternatively titled the March For the Same Shit Leftists Always March For.

Unknown said...

Really, Really Unpopular - http://talkingpointsmemo.com/edblog/really-really-unpopular

CNN: 40% Gallup: 44% ABC/WAPO: 37% Quinnipiac: 37% CBS: 37%

Trumpland: Ratings, ratings, ratings.

Ann Althouse said...

"I'd rather have insulting songs written about a President than songs of praise and worship."

I agree. What a relief after today! We can get back to insulting the President.

bgates said...

I'd like to see marches with new chants.

but not Fiona's underpants.

Bay Area Guy said...

I see London, I see France, I see Fiona's underpants.

Brando said...

"I agree. What a relief after today! We can get back to insulting the President."

Not in this blog's comment threads! If you criticize anything about Trump here, you basically want socialist establishment open-borders godless abortions on every corner and secretly hate white people, particularly those that work with their hands which are going nowhere near Fiona Apple's underpants.

Matthew Sablan said...

... Yes. Please.

Sing us MORE songs about underpants and Trump's tiny hands. That will show America how serious the entertainment world is about this.

Laslo Spatula said...

From the Gatsby post comments:

betamax3000 said...
"Perhaps all of Gatsby can be reduced to the Damp Underwear Snake and the Room That Eludes Him."

Still pretty much applicable to just about anything.

Obama as Gatsby vs. Trump as Gatsby.

Look through the Gatsby Snow Globe at that.

I am Laslo.

Unknown said...

Trump Military Parades - http://talkingpointsmemo.com/livewire/trump-military-parades

Hey, it will be real fun if the military goose-stepped. Gee, golly that would be so cool. Followed by stretching their right arm out as they walk past Herr Trump - you know, in a yoga-like way, nothing nasty.

Rumors is Russia, North Korea, Iran also have military parades. Must be the fashion these days.

bgates said...

We can get back to insulting the President

just as soon as the feckless narcissistic anti-American hateful divisive demagogic pig-ignorant arrogant jug-eared son of a bitch finishes his eight year run of inflicting insult and injury on any part of the world that he deems insufficiently worshipful and begins to watch the erosion of his reputation once patriotic adults come to town to try to fix what he's enjoyed breaking.

DanTheMan said...

>>CNN: 40% Gallup: 44% ABC/WAPO: 37% Quinnipiac: 37% CBS: 37%


I totally believe polls from organizations that are actively hostile to Donald Trump, and completely wrong about their election predictions.


FullMoon said...

DanTheMan said... [hush]​[hide comment]

Did I mention that I saw London, and I saw France?

haha!
when I was a little boy, old guy in neighborhood fought in France WW1 . Taught us "Roll me over, yankee soldier. Went home a sang it for my mom....(reminds me of time heard the big kids saying "cock sucker" , thought it was some kind of bird, went home and asked mom....)


bgates said...

Rumors is Russia, North Korea, Iran also have military parades.

Golly.

More than 2,100 military personnel will be marching in the parade, with a total of about 5,000 troops supporting the inauguration.

That's a story from 2012.

JaimeRoberto said...

Ms. Apple doesn't have much to worry about on that count.

Yancey Ward said...

Trump resurrecting Apple's career would be quite the feat, and I write that as someone who is actually a fan of Ms. Apple.

Yancey Ward said...

Brando wrote:

"Well if Trump can bring Fiona Apple's career back from the dead, maybe he can save other moribund industries."

Ah, damn, you beat me to it.

Rick said...

I'd like to see marches with new chants.


You're in luck:

Pigs in a blanket, fry'em like bacon.

BLM Anthem

mccullough said...

Apple is smart. Monetize the Resistance. Trump approves.

mccullough said...

With all the new Resistance groups, Soros is going to run out of money. They need more sponsors.

mockturtle said...

It's not really 'what democracy looks like'. It's what a bunch of petulant, spoiled brats do to get attention.

Craig said...

"This is what democracy looks like" has been chanted at least for two decades. I remember hearing it in the 90s. It's fresher than "What do we want?/X!/When do we want it?/Now!" and "Hey, hey, ho, ho/X has got to go," but it was an old standby long before the 2011 Wisconsin protests.

exhelodrvr1 said...

What about Ted Kennedy in his underpants at the Kennedy place in Florida?

tcrosse said...

Whadda we want ?
Incremental change !
When do we want it ?
In due course !

Dan Hossley said...

I don't think she speaks for all women. Typical lefty.

roesch/voltaire said...

My daughter and grand daughter will be marching this Saturday--probably wearing underpants, but but more concerned about men keeping their hands off women's reproductive rights. .

Comanche Voter said...

I seem to remember that Monica first got Billy Jeff's attention by flaunting her thong at him. Who knows what goes through women's minds? Laslo can 'splain it all.

Big Mike said...

I agree. What a relief after today! We can get back to insulting the President.

@Althouse, nothing except your rose-colored glasses stopped you anytime during the past eight years.

JackO Fire said...

Whoa, I was recording The Coup's "Kill My Landlord" album today and there's a chant in their self-titled track "The Coup":

Brace yourself Bush, it's collection day.
Brace yourself Trump, it's collection day.
Brace yourself Dupont, it's collection day.


This from 1993!
Jack O'Fire

mccullough said...

They should form the Panties Party and work to get more of their adherents into elected office. Protest is useful if the attention you attract leads to some organization of members. Otherwise, it's just ranting.

FullMoon said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Titus said...

Now I am picturing Obama in his undies. Nice big black ass and cock.

Hot.

Titus said...

And Fiona is still hot. I love how thin she is. Very chic.

n.n said...

It sounds like she has lost control. She should consider hiring a nanny.

n.n said...

Democratic women who support abortion rites

Hate Loves Abortion

rhhardin said...

Gregorian chants should be tried.

A monk march.

Lead monk: I can beat you at dominoes.

Response: No you can't beat us at dominoes.

Curious George said...

"roesch/voltaire said...
My daughter and grand daughter will be marching this Saturday--probably wearing underpants, but but more concerned about men keeping their hands off women's reproductive rights. ."

And by that you mean abortion, right? Why can't you fuckers ever be honest?

Drago said...

DanTheMan: ">>CNN: 40% Gallup: 44% ABC/WAPO: 37% Quinnipiac: 37% CBS: 37


I totally believe polls from organizations that are actively hostile to Donald Trump, and completely wrong about their election predictions"

Let's just let Unknown continue lying naked on the kitchen floor covered in MSM polls and the knowledge that Hillary won the Presidency of California.

We will simply have to content ourselves with the actual Presidency and control of Congress.

rhhardin said...

The devil finds work for tiny hands.

rhhardin said...

Each marcher should carry a fish.

glenn said...

Fiona has nothing to worry about.

n.n said...

The leading cause of childhood mortality is abortion rites. Think of the children!

robother said...

The sheer monotony of her song seems inspired by the Underpants Gnomic chanty. Maybe this is best understood as the outcry of someone missing her underpants, and warning the little lightfingers responsible.

n.n said...

Friendship with "benefits". Polygamy without commitment. Progress.

Losing your liberal culture. No Judgment.

eric said...

Blogger n.n said...
Democratic women who support abortion rites

Hate Loves Abortion


Love Abortions Hate

n.n said...

She Chose. She Conceived. She Aborted.

That and extra-judicial trials are another reason why Obama and his heir apparent, Clinton, lost. The euphemisms and semantic play have lost their viability. Abort them, NOW.

Earnest Prole said...

Underpants-gnome planning is a primary metaphor for modern politics, economics, and culture; you could use that tag virtually every day. But just plain underpants works too.

I Use Computers to Write Words said...

You should bring back The Gatsby Project. This is at least the second time you've mentioned it in the last few months, and there might have been a third, which demonstrates sustained interest on your part. I was too young to appreciate it when you did it the first time, but now I think I'd find it quite interesting.

I did a preceptorial on Chekhov short stories in the fall, and I found diving into both the details and the larger picture very rewarding. (Chekhov, too, writes excellent sentences, even in translation. If you ever have the desire to branch out into other projects, I would absolutely recommend him.) There was an amusing moment when the tutor asked if anyone had thoughts on the meaning of a very small detail in "Gooseberries." Another student responded "Does that... have to mean anything?" and tutor, who is brilliant, but does not suffer fools, looked him in the eyes and said simply "Every single word is important." I don't think the student was thrilled to be made an example of, but it was good to get that point on the table.

Anyway, I vote yes for Gatsby.

Sigivald said...

I normally like Apple's music well enough, but that's just ... lame.

(Protest chants are themselves lame, honestly. Are they anything but warmed-over 1968 nostalgia?)

(Thanks to commenters above for proving the Feminist Left not entirely wrong, by just bringing up looks or weight as Gotchas. Classy, right?)

walter said...

A lot on her mind..

What's new pussyhat? Whoah-a-whoah, whoahhh

FullMoon said...

Sigivald said... [hush]​[hide comment]

.....

(Thanks to commenters above for proving the Feminist Left not entirely wrong, by just bringing up looks or weight as Gotchas. Classy, right?)


Yep, especially disappointing on this blog.

eric said...

I should have written, "Love Aborts Hate"

Mark said...

We don't want your tiny hands/Anywhere near our underpants

Well, the problem with that is that then they go and say --

We demand you put your tiny hands filled with money in our underpants to pay for our IUDs and diaphragms and sponges and other contraception.

walter said...

"Thanks to commenters above for proving the Feminist Left not entirely wrong, by just bringing up looks or weight as Gotchas. Classy, right?"

Well..she "went there" with the small hands bit...

Fen said...

Trump was talking about groupies, "women who throw themselves at you" so shamelessly that they would let you grab them by the pussy.

Hey Fiona, if you dont want us to grab you by your pussy then stop jumpimg in our lap and rubbing your tits in our face. You boney slut.

This is as stupid as "the Russians hacked our election" narrative

Fen said...

"Thanks to commenters for proving the feminist left-"

Bullshit. The feminist left routinely mocks the looks and weight of women they disagree with.

You know where you can stick your faux outrage.

Michael K said...

"We don't want your tiny hands/Anywhere near our underpants"

I can understand why.

To modify an old joke. How do you recognize the feminist ballet dancer ?

Answer: when they do the splits, she's the one who sticks to the floor.

Fen said...

"my daughters marching to keep men's hands of their reproductive rights"

Dear Daughters of a mother who raised you to selfish irresponsible cunts who want sex so bad they are willing to kill for it:

1) your mother should have taught you that intercourse carries a risk of pregnancy
If you choose to accept that risk, you are exercising your reproductive rights.

2) your mother should have taught you that birth control is not 100% effective. If you choose to take that risk, you are exercising your reproductive rights.

3) But when another life is on the table, your reproductive rights do not trump another human's right to life.

I'm sorry your mother didn't raise you to be responsible for the choices you make. But consider that even rapists avoid killing another human over an orgasm.

But at least you can thank her for not killing you just because she still wanted to party every weekend.

roesch/voltaire said...

C George why your focus on abortion when reproductive rights mean access to birth control so that women can make choices about when or if to have a child.

walter said...

What? Trump's against access to "birth control"?

JAORE said...

"...reproductive rights mean access to birth control so that women can make choices about when or if to have a child. "

But, my dear fellow, is there really any hot debate on regular birth control?

I keep hearing the left say conservatives want to outlaw birth control. Some certainly want to stop chemical abortions. But, outside of that, I know no one that is against birth control being available.

Some also object to paying for women's birth control, but that is more a matter of resisting ever expanding governmental spending (IMO) than anti-birth control.

It's another red herring. Of course so is the implication that birth control is, as a general rule, very expensive.

So, yep "reproductive rights" really boils down to abortion.

And I say this as a (reluctant) supporter of choice.

n.n said...

Men and women are equal and complementary.

We the People and our Posterity.

Humanists, not feminists.

Abortion! What is it good for? Wealth, pleasure, leisure, and Democratic leverage.

Responsibility, not divestment.

Make life, not abortion.

Let's see. What else?

Diversity, not [class] diversity. Racism, sexism are progressive. Monotonic change.

No Judgment. No broad strokes. Character witness.

Equality, not congruence.

Life from conception, not a stork. Science, not mysticism.

The tell-tale hearts beat ever louder. They call for the female chauvinists and their Pro-Choice Church.

The twilight ends with the dawn. Revitalization. Rehabilitation. Reconciliation.

Fen said...

"Reproductive rights means access to birth control so women can make choices about when or if to have a child"

Thank you for spotlighting the moral bankruptcy of feminists.

The choice about when or if to have a child is made when you choose to have intercourse. Nitrh control is not 100% effective, so you might as well be playing Russian Roulette with the life of another human.

Not to mention your denial of personal responsibility. How can women expect to be regarded as equals, much less respected, when they refuse to accept responsibility for the reproductive choices they make?