December 31, 2015

4 imagined reactions to Jeb's New Year's Eve anti-Trump ad.



I'm not saying any of these are my reaction. These are just 4 sketches of what's going on in the head of 4 imagined viewers of Jeb's video.

1. The music is so annoying! Why is Jeb annoying me? If he had something important to say, would he be poking me in the eardrums like that? Go away, Jeb. You've lost. Can't you at least be dignified about it? Are you using high-energy music because Trump called you low energy? You're trying to scare me about "chaos," so you put on chaos music? But if I'm chaos-averse enough to take your prompt and fear Chaos Trump, I'm chaos-averse enough to click off the video before I see the five terrible things you've cherry picked on Trump, and if I can put up with the music, well, maybe I'm the kind of person who likes the way Trump is shaking things up on smug insiders like you.

2. Why appropriate New Year's Eve? Can't I just enjoy my holiday? I suppose you know you're going down and you've decided to go out with a bang. Couldn't you wait until the holidays are over, and couldn't you end it with some grace and dignity, like by embracing the best other candidate to carry forward the old tradition of Republican moderation or whatever it is you're supposed to represent? Was I supposed to receive this ad in a spirit of holiday drunkenness, like: Whoa! Everything is spiraling out of control! I need to get this Trump spirit out of my system and make a New Year's resolution to quit drinking that stuff? Sorry, Jeb. I was never drunk on Trump, and I resent the insinuation. I'm listening, and I'm thinking, and maybe you need to do some of that New Year's reflection on the subject of whether the people who are responding to Trump are actually stone cold sober.

3. Oh, man, these jerks, these nerds, trying to get a gotcha on Trump. Right off, there's this what's your favorite Bible verse bullshit. Yeah, I'll say "bullshit." Trump said "bullshit" twice to a big crowd of Iowans and Nebraskans the other day. I don't have a Bible verse on the tip of my brain to hand out to any clown who thinks he's got a way to prove I'm not religious. Or, hey, here: "It is written, you shall not test the Lord your God." That means, if you're testing me, you're the Satan in this conversation. Look it up. It's Matthew 4. And "nuclear triad"? And Hugh Hewitt, with his glossy hairdo and his legs-of-the-triad hand gestures... you're testing us again. Yeah, we don't know the term. Trump didn't know the term. So what? So the hell what? And Jeb collecting all this stuff is like the dweeby schoolboy who does a Nelson Muntz "ha ha" at the school marm's corrections. I'm sticking with the popular boy, Trump.

4. Thanks, Jeb, for waking me up to the terrible chaos that lies ahead if any human being becomes President. Please enfold me now in your tender arms and comfort me.

37 comments:

Shouting Thomas said...

In the beginning was the Word.

dbp said...

It is an irritating and irrelevant ad: It tells the viewer nothing he doesn't already know about Trump while offering no alternative.

If I were writing the copy, it would cut between Trump saying something outrageous and Bush saying something statesmanlike. You know, contrast the two.

Phil 314 said...

Trump is full of shit. Not chaos, just a steaming pile.

David Begley said...

Wait for the contra Trump ad featuring Donald performing for World Wrestling Entertainment. Go to the WWE website and search for Trump.

In one clip Trump physically attacks Vince McMahon. In another clip Trump drops money from the rafters.

Future President.

Johanna Lapp said...

Not a Christian myself. But isn't admitting your sins and asking God for forgiveness the indispensible step that separates Christianity from Unitarianism, Universalism, secular humanism, Scientology, est, Reverend Wright-ism?

The Donald boasts, loudly, that he has never asked God for forgiveness ... presumably because he's never needed to.

If we're not supposed to judge the sincerity of a self-proclaimed Christian, why does Matthew 7:16 prescribe a standard for judging?

traditionalguy said...

But Dick Cheney and Dad said we rule in a New World Order. Really we do. We do. We do. We do. Now as you relax imagine that it is 1990 again and submit to our power to rule as you feel Reagan's easy victory years before China de-industrialized us and Russian military power came back.

Mike Sylwester said...

What's the proof that Putin killed journalists?

Amexpat said...

Agree that it's an irritating and lame ad. About as effectual as JB is as a candidate.

If anyone wants to go after Trump, they can't nip at his heels with petty gotchas. They got to focus on one issue where he's vulnerable and hammer it in. His suspicious medical deferment during the Vietnam war seems obvious to me. Problem is that you need someone who served in Vietnam, or at least saw active service, to deliver that message and none of the leading GOP candidates have that.

MAJMike said...

Psalm 144:1.

Michael K said...

JEB is spending the money before the year end for some reason we don't know. Maybe his deal with the donors has a clause: "I will spend X by January 1." What else could it be ? He's done and starting to stink.

David Begley said...

There is enough material on Trump to make 10 similar commercials.

If Jeb wants to win he should have 10 more made. He's got the money.

Mid-Life Lawyer said...

Bush looks worse; Trump looks stronger. Every attack on Trump seems to come out this way.

Is it worse to participate in a Sports Entertainment skit or to be raised and mentored by communists, ride your skin color to the highest office in the nation, and then do a complete, cynical 180 on the promise of being the first post-racial, post-Blue and Red president?

I would have voted for Trump over Obama in 2008. I already knew what Obama was and shouted it from the roof tops. Trump may be buffoonish but he doesn't despise his country and he could not possibly be worse than Obama has been.

John Henry said...

I watched about half the ad. All I could take.

Somebody mentioned steaming pile of crap, this ad is all that and more.

I guess the message is "Trump very bad, Jeb! Very good". I found it hard to tell with the annoying music over everything.

Maybe it will boost Jeb from 8% to 9%. From definitely 5th place to almost 4th place.

John Henry

David said...

5. Jeb has raised lots and lots of money from friends of his daddy and brother, This is why he can annoy me with these ads.

David said...

"as you feel Reagan's easy victory years before China de-industrialized us and Russian military power came back."

There was nothing easy about "Reagan's victory." It was fraught with risk and difficulty that are now forgotten because things turned out in our favor.

John Henry said...

traditionalguy said...

"before China de-industrialized us"

You do realize that we manufacture more in the US today that ever, don't you? that is true even if you adjust for increased population and look at manufacturing per capita.

We don't do the low end stuff anymore. We don't do the stuff that requires of unskilled, low wage jobs anymore. That's probably a good thing. Loss of manufacturing jobs is due as much to automation as to low overseas wages.

Want to see what manufacturing work looked like before automation? Here is a video of how they used to bottle booze in Seagrams in the 60's. You want to do one of those jobs 40 hours a week for 30-40 years?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ls3EpSe3EOo

A comparable line today runs about 4-5 times as fast and might require 4 people total.

We still manufacture more than ever before on an dollar basis adjusted for inflation.




John Henry

David said...

David Begley said...
There is enough material on Trump to make 10 similar commercials.

If Jeb wants to win he should have 10 more made. He's got the money.


Nah. They're going to let Hillary do it after Trump is nominated.

Michael K said...

"you need someone who served in Vietnam, or at least saw active service,"

Al Gore ! I would not be surprised to see the Democrats turn to him in the end.

Kerry also "served" but has that small problem of Paris and the NV delegation in 1972 when he was still a reserve officer in the Navy. Of course that didn't come up in 2004.

Guildofcannonballs said...

It is quite accurate and notable Trump inflicts chaos on his opponents, the country, the world, and, yes I'll say it, indeed the universe known (but mostly the unknown ones) as a candidate.

Are you frightened of a Trump presidency, because as Tolkien said, son, you ain't damn nearly poopless scared enough yet. But you will be, OH YES, you will be. And your little ratdog too*!

Like Kid Rock to Joe Dirt, we all wanna see you cry.

Mwhuaaaahhhaaaa hhhaaa hhhaaa hhhaaa!!

*Please give credit to the Wizard of Oz people for that inspiration, I could have done it without them but it would have taken eons of alternate, possibly parallel, existences.

HoodlumDoodlum said...

David Begley said...Future President

Far future President Camacho

Amexpat said...

"Al Gore ! I would not be surprised to see the Democrats turn to him in the end."

Hillary's campaign would have to collapse for that to occur. If so, I think dems would turn to Biden as the saviour rather than Gore. In any event, Trump needs to be taken down by someone in the GOP. Otherwise, there's a real chance that he could get the nomination,split the party and pave the way for a HRC landslide.

Wince said...

A synthesizer doing an accordion that's trying to sound like bagpipes?

WTF is JEB thinking?

Gusty Winds said...

None of the Bush ads will damage Trump. Jeb will come off looking like schmuck and will just get schlonged by the Donald once again. Trump has made Jeb his bitch. Jeb just can't see it outside of the establishment bubble.

Gusty Winds said...

EDH said...WTF is JEB thinking?

He's not thinking. He's doggy paddling.

Chuck said...

I very much prefer the Democrat/Left's complaints about Jeb Bush, as compared to the Trumpkin complaints about Jeb. At least the Left is saying something I can respond to; the notion that Jeb's administration would be stocked with Neocons from past Republican administrations. Sounds good to me. Whereas the Trump complaints are all hysterical ruminations about "energy", and supposed weakness and being just the same as Democrats. (Ask a Democrat about that one!)

While the Trumpkins are uniformly middle-aged white men, the sound like teenaged girls.

Gabriel said...

@Ann: "It is written, you shall not test the Lord your God." That means, if you're testing me, you're the Satan in this conversation.

Only if you are God, Ann.

Ann Althouse said...

"Only if you are God, Ann."

That's not me, that's a fictional character.

Ann Althouse said...

She says, enigmatically.

Fernandinande said...

I'm not religious, but have a favorite Biblical punchline anyway:
"And the stork, and the heron after her kind, and the lapwing, and the bat" walk into a bar.

Snark said...

Once there was a pile of dogshit on the sidewalk near my house. At first I was repulsed. Who or what left this pile of reeking dogshit in the public space? But then, as it lingered day after day, it began to fascinate me. How had I missed the subtle shades of brown, the engineered brilliance of its deceptively casual coil? I thought and thought about the dogshit. When the flies came and gobbled up the sheen I felt a tug of loss, but was humbled by the vital contribution the shit was making to the greater good. Go dogshit! Other people, PC idiots mostly, continued to step around the dogshit with a grimace and a warning. LOL. Whatever. Dogshit just needs lots of thought and getting used to to be properly appreciated, and then it pretty much justifies itself.

hombre said...

If Trump is not a shill for Hillary, we are looking at the matchup we deserve: Trump vs. Hillary.

The idolaters don't care what they have said or done. The rest of us will either stay home, vote against a person or vote against a party.

We're toast and we earned it.

Big Mike said...

@Althouse, well I'm certain Meade thinks you're a Goddess.

@Begley, less than a week after the San Bernardino attack our current president taped a segment where he played straight man to Jerry Seinfeld. As for me, I'm persuaded that Hillary Clinton, if elected, would be showering money on corporations and individuals that contribute to the Clinton Foundation in a ratio of about $1000 per dollar contributed to the Foundation, not merely dollar bills from the rafters of a professional wrestling arena.

Big Mike said...

There's a lot to wonder about as far as whether Trump would make a good president, but as regards Jeb Bush and Hillary Clinton, he certainly gets it.

Meade said...

"@Althouse, well I'm certain Meade thinks you're a Goddess."

You are correct. A goddess wrapped in a mystery, inside an enigma.

ken in tx said...

Bush was being interviewed on NPR's Morning Edition this morning. I clicked it off because his voice annoys me, and because it was clear that NPR was trying to boost his prospects. They must really be afraid of Trump and Cruz.

Sammy Finkelman said...

It is written, you shall not test the Lord your God." That means, if you're testing me, you're the Satan in this conversation. Look it up. It's Matthew 4.

Actually, it is Deuteronomy.

http://www.mechon-mamre.org/p/pt/pt0506.htm

טז לֹא תְנַסּוּ, אֶת-יְהוָה אֱלֹהֵיכֶם, כַּאֲשֶׁר נִסִּיתֶם, בַּמַּסָּה. 16 Ye shall not try the LORD your God, as ye tried Him in Massah

The word here "try" really means "test"

It's the same word in Hebrew as here: (were the word "prove" is used in the translation)

http://www.mechon-mamre.org/p/pt/pt0122.htm

א וַיְהִי, אַחַר הַדְּבָרִים הָאֵלֶּה, וְהָאֱלֹהִים, נִסָּה אֶת-אַבְרָהָם; וַיֹּאמֶר אֵלָיו, אַבְרָהָם וַיֹּאמֶר הִנֵּנִי. 1 And it came to pass after these things, that God did prove Abraham, and said unto him 'Abraham'; and he said: 'Here am I.'

Sammy Finkelman said...

Are they Bush's ads or a pro-Bush SuperPac?

If they don't have the tagline "I'm Jeb Bush and I approved this message" they are not official Bush camaign ads.