June 2, 2013

"Michael Douglas... has revealed that his throat cancer was apparently caused by performing oral sex."

"HPV, the sexually transmitted virus best known as a cause of cervical and anal cancer and genital warts, is thought to be responsible for an increasing proportion of oral cancers...."
Mahesh Kumar, a consultant head and neck surgeon in London, confirmed that the last decade has seen a dramatic rise in this form of cancer, particularly among younger sufferers. Recent studies of 1,316 patients with oral cancer found that 57% of them were HPV-16 positive.

"It has been established beyond reasonable doubt that the HPV type 16 is the causative agent in oropharyngeal cancer," said Kumar...

But Kumar expressed scepticism that Douglas's cancer was caused solely by HPV, and surprise at Douglas's assertion that cunnilingus could also help cure the condition. "Maybe he thinks that more exposure to the virus will boost his immune system. But medically, that just doesn't make sense."

76 comments:

edutcher said...

Maybe that explains how good he was as Liberace.

Eustace Chilke said...

McQueen favored leatrille. Douglas goes with cunnilingus. Advantage Douglas.

gadfly said...

Death by cunnilingus. What a way to go!

gk1 said...

Actors and rock stars. Is there anything they don't know?

somefeller said...

This is a type of humblebrag.

MisterBuddwing said...

I'm feeling kind of sorry for Catherine Zeta-Jones...

Michael K said...

This is a coming epidemic as a high percentage of young men are positive for the virus in oral swabs now.

Inga said...

Raccoons wash their food before eating it. Of course HPV can't be washed away.

El Pollo Raylan said...

I'm with Ed on this. Plus isn't Douglas cast in an upcoming Mark Felt biopic?

Chef Mojo said...

I'm feeling kind of sorry for Catherine Zeta-Jones...

Yeah, and women in general when guys get spooked by this.

Rappers all over the place are feeling vindicated. They've never been down with, uh, being down...

Chef Mojo said...

"You know nothing, Jon Snow! Well. Maybe something..."

;-)

rcocean said...

Michael Douglas - millionaire's son and class act - to the end.

rcocean said...

Oral Sex on who?

Obvious question.

rhhardin said...

If you're going to cure your cancer with oral sex, you have to find a partner who has the virus.

ricpic said...

Oral sex on who?

Over at Salon it's a toss up between Sharon Stone and Gary Busey.

chuck said...

a high percentage of young men are positive

Yet another argument in favor of older women.

Rabel said...

Following up the Hillary/Obama sex post with this one is making me feel queasy.

Dante said...

Rappers all over the place are feeling vindicated. They've never been down with, uh, being down...

That's cause black women are prickly down there. Steel wool prickly.

Tim said...

"It has been established beyond reasonable doubt that the HPV type 16 is the causative agent in oropharyngeal cancer," said Kumar...

Here's betting one of two things:

1) The View, Cosmopolitan, and O will not cover this unless 2) it is to debunk it.

YoungHegelian said...

Oh, I bet Douglas wasn't being serious when he said that business about oral sex being the cause & cure of his throat cancer. He was saying that tongue-in-uuuuhhhhhhhhhhhmmmmmmm.........

Tim said...

"That's cause black women are prickly down there. Steel wool prickly."

Michelle Obama has a new First-Lady-like gig just waiting for her...maybe she can enlist Waka Flocka Flame in the community outreach...and Listerine can sponsor the out-of-pocket costs.

MathMom said...

TMI.

Baron Zemo said...

Some video has come to light that shows what Liberace really thought about "Behind the Candelabra."

viator said...

FYI

Demonstration

A whole body condom would also work.

Frank Drebin demonstrates

AllenS said...

Didn't he have a thing for porn stars a while ago? I can see where there might be a problem.

Rhythm and Balls said...

"Maybe he thinks that more exposure to the virus will boost his immune system. But medically, that just doesn't make sense."

Except perhaps when given in the form of Gardasil(R) or Cervarix(R).

SOJO said...

I don't think it's a slam at CZJ since MD was a well known womanizer for years and years before CZJ.

Still, STDs are a HUGE problem with hook up culture that I never see mentioned anymore. My more, um, outgoing friends in college?, always dealing with warts or whatever.

It's one of the only areas where I'm actively glad I'm not 20-something. It's one thing to have the freedom to indulge if you wish to be edgy (my era), it's another for it to be expected.

My 11 yr old niece is already fully shaved, okay? She doesn't even fully understand WHY she's shaved I don't think. She just knows it is gross not to be.

24/7 porn culture would be stressful.

rcocean said...

The decline of America in five words:

Kirk Douglas to Michael Douglas.

chuck said...

Maybe women should come with cancer warnings tattooed in the appropriate spot, like cigarettes. Something like

SURGEON GENERALS WARNING:
Quitting Oral Sex Now Greatly Reduces Serious Risks to Your Health.

Showing graphic pictures to discourage sex could become a progressive cause.

gspencer said...

My spouse and I have been having oral sex for >25 years. Because it's a part of our private sex lives, we, like Douglas here, want to share this aspect of our marital lives with the world at large. When we host dinner parties we make sure our enjoyment of oral sex finds its way in the dinner conversation.

edutcher said...

rcocean said...

The decline of America in five words:

Kirk Douglas to Michael Douglas.


No, Dad got around plenty, too.

Oso Negro said...

Well, maybe I have to rethink our recent discussions on chicks who work that '70s vibe.

Vittorio Jano IV said...

Col. Angus causes cancer;
Col. Angus cures cancer ....

'Twas grace that taught my heart to fear,
And grace my fears reliev'd ....

LarsPorsena said...

I think Pogo remarked on the rise of head and neck cancers via oral sex in a post earlier this year. I've forgotten the subject.

Pogo?

Vittorio Jano IV said...

Col. Angus causes cancer;
Col. Angus cures cancer ....

'Twas grace that taught my heart to fear,
And grace my fears reliev'd ....

Paco Wové said...

"I'm feeling kind of sorry for Catherine Zeta-Jones"

Wasn't somebody talking about the movie(s) Liquid Sky recently? 'It's only fair that I warn them, this pussy has teeth.'

rcocean said...

"No, Dad got around plenty, too."

I was referring to performing oral sex and then talking about it - PUBLICLY.

And blaming your cancer on oral sex and then talking about it - PUBLICLY.

TA said...

Holy shit! You know, some people just talk too damn much. And this from guy who just volunteered to be the butt-fuckee in service of the film arts. Are we sure it's cunnilingus we're talking about here?

Rhythm and Balls said...

I was referring to performing oral sex and then talking about it - PUBLICLY.

And blaming your cancer on oral sex and then talking about it - PUBLICLY.


There is no greater sin in the conservative imagination than accurately informing the public about what's dangerous about a personal vice and what isn't. Ignorance is far better!

Suffer silently! And never seek to spare a curious public the pain of a personal tragedy when an educational anecdote will do! Never!

Rhythm and Balls said...

What's better than talking about sex and its consequences honestly and in public, is subjecting one of your employees to it while getting yourself off over the phone. Noted Republican Sympathizer and creatively emotional newsman, Bill O'Reilly, did just such a thing in the following monologue, which left his female employee disgusted enough to file suit. (Note that in the monologue, O'Reilly refers to a Middle Eastern sandwich in place of a Swedish word for a bath sponge. Apparently this is what a contempt for facts gets you).

"You would basically be in the shower and then I would come in and I'd join you and you would have your back toward me and I would take that little loofah thing and kinda soap up your back... rub it all over you, get you to relax, hot water... and um... you know, you'd feel the tension drain out of you and uh you would still be with your back toward me, then I would kinda put my arm, in one of those mitts, those loofah mitts you know, so I got my hands in it... and I would put it around front, kinda rub your tummy a little bit with it, and then with my other hand I would start to massage your boobs, get your nipples really hard... 'cuz I like that and you have really spectacular boobs...

So anyway I'd be rubbing your big boobs and getting your nipples really hard, kinda kissing your neck from behind... and then I would take the other hand with the falafel thing and I'd put it on your p*ssy but you'd have to do it really light, just kind of a tease business."


I understand that, somehow, liberals must have been responsible for this.

Basta! said...

R & B, what kind of imagination characterizes cunnilingus as a VICE?!

Rhythm and Balls said...

No other term allowed me to humor rcocean's contention than that one, Basta!

El Pollo Raylan said...

Basta! said...
R & B, what kind of imagination characterizes cunnilingus as a VICE?!

The kind that prefers analingus?

Just a hunch.

El Pollo Raylan said...

@R&B: I hadn't heard of that O'Reilly "harass sarah" business. The mere fact that a settlement was reached does not mean that O'Reilly was guilty as charged. Confer the nuisance lawsuits brought against Palin. In my opinion (and I don't expect you to respect it), this is exactly the sort of dirty innuendo extortion tactics used by the left to bring down enemies.

Phil 3:14 said...

Peter is speechless.

Rhythm and Balls said...

The kind that prefers analingus?

Now, to be fair, nothing that rcocean said about how horrible he though it was for Michael Douglas to talk about the origin of his cancer implies that he prefers analingus.

Rhythm and Balls said...

I hadn't heard of that O'Reilly "harass sarah" business.

Prefacing your comment by professing ignorance to this well-publicized incident does not inspire confidence that you're very knowledgeable about it. And immediately linking it in your own mind to another one of your favorite political "martyrs" shows that you're probably too biased to even understand it.

The mere fact that a settlement was reached does not mean that O'Reilly was guilty as charged.

No. The fact that she sought $60 million in damages and had tapes so compelling that Bill couldn't even address it does.

Confer the nuisance lawsuits brought against Palin.

Doing this would do much more for you than for me, or probably for anyone else.

Dude, she was an employee of his, or of FOX's. Why would she have a political axe to grind against him? They obviously worked closely, obviously spoke on the phone. If the evidence had not been so compelling it would have been dealt with in a different manner. Maybe still settled, maybe not. But to the contrary, everything about his response and the way FOX handled it suggested a rushed, "hush, hush!" strategy. There's every reason to think that a bunch of very unflattering conversations, that they didn't want to see the light of day, or at least given extra attention, were recorded and available.

In my opinion (and I don't expect you to respect it),

Use some facts and an interest in objectivity to back it up and I might.

this is exactly the sort of dirty innuendo extortion tactics used by the left to bring down enemies.

Where was the conspiracy? Which Democratic political operatives were involved? Is O'Reilly even a politician? What political interest did a lowly intern of his have? Wasn't keeping a job free of harassment a bigger interest for such a person?

Occam would have to build a razor a mile thick for you to ignore all the evidence against what you're saying in favor of the innuendo (yes, the word works both ways) that you're suggestively throwing up against the wall as if any of it would stick.

El Pollo Raylan said...

@R&B:: Weren't you just going on here a few night ago about how Matt Drudge was gay and how you were surprised it wasn't a liability for him? That you are obsessed with attacking your beloved POTUS's nemeses is my best armchair diagnosis of your affliction. Now let's go back to respecting our mutual opinions on science matters, shall we? Otherwise I'll feel compelled to chibit you as Churchill (again).

bagoh20 said...

Oral sex? You mean like kissing. I've done that, but I won't do it again.

MisterBuddwing said...

When we host dinner parties we make sure our enjoyment of oral sex finds its way in the dinner conversation.

Well, that's one way to save on food...

Rhythm and Balls said...

I notice that you never quote me in response to what you say, when it comes to things that you don't like to hear. So you rely on your constructed memory later to come up with oddly misinterpreted meanings. Or distort them so as to refocus on their sonics or the way they can be exaggeratedly portrayed by obvious caricatures through Chirbit.

But in responding to what you say directly, I view this as respectful treatment. I am taking seriously what you say and responding with serious rebuttals. Scientists do this. Why can't social commenters? That we find scientific matters (usually) easier to agree on doesn't mean that social or political issues should be part of a magical realm, where reasoning can't apply. Does it?

Now it seems you want to drop all this, but then throw in a challenge (another erroneous one) on what I said on Matt Drudge. Am I wrong if I were to respond to that? My issue with him is how and why he chooses to suppress a part of himself, while throwing every piece of personal innuendo possible at his own enemies. It makes him hypocritical and someone whose political interests trump his self-respect, but if you are fine with that then there isn't much more for me to say.

rcocean's strange comment is what prompted my comments as they seem to reflect an ideological preference for avoiding personal or educational matters regarding physical intimacy. They had nothing to do with Obama, and I only brought up O'Reilly because that monologue of his was funny as hell, and his suppression of it seems to fall in line with how the rcoceans of the world also want to suppress discussion of consensual, intimate matters.

Rhythm and Balls said...

Anyway, if you truly want to bury that (and I don't say "hatchet" since I don't perceive that we're really at odds personally, just in terms of different perceptions), maybe we can post some videos. Your taste in music is also interesting and something that we sometimes share. Can't I post a few Beastie Boys videos to explore? I've been listening the hell out of them the past few days, finally accepting after one long year just how irreplaceable MCA will be.

Inga said...

Kissing, ugh, a dirty nasty thing. Better to let your dog lick you on the mouth.

ironrailsironweights said...

My 11 yr old niece is already fully shaved, okay? She doesn't even fully understand WHY she's shaved I don't think. She just knows it is gross not to be.

I just vomited.

Peter

bagoh20 said...

This is why I always spit after I kiss a girl. It's what they call "safe sex".

Rhythm and Balls said...

"They" call it that?

Inga said...

French poodles are great kissers, Bagoh.

William said...

I don't think this will change the behavior of many people, but it will increase their anxiety level. Thanks for sharing, Michael........I know he didn't mean to say that he got throat cancer from licking Catherine Zeta Jones' pussy, but that's what will be at the back of everyone's mind. She'll probably have to tip the pool boy extra.

bagoh20 said...

"French poodles are great kissers, Bagoh."

Even if you spit afterward that's still called bestiality. I don't judge you for that, but if that poodle is French, you have no standards whatsoever.

bagoh20 said...

I only kiss AMERICAN Pit Bull Terriers, and German Shepherds who fought for the resistance.

Inga said...

Embrasse-moi vous tromper!

bagoh20 said...

"Embrasse-moi vous tromper!"

...aber erst in dieser Schale pinkeln

El Pollo Raylan said...

@Inga: qu'est-ce que tu fais avec le bosch?

bagoh20 said...

You need to trim that.

Inga said...

Ich unarme sie fest?

Inga said...

Oops should be umarme. But I guess I could unarm ya too.

bagoh20 said...

Lefties are always trying to unarme.

stlcdr said...

Now whenever an associate says they have a bit of a sore throat, you know what they have been doing...

Rusty said...

You know the difference between pussy and parsley?













nobody eats parsley.

Franklin said...

A couple classics ITT:

The decline of America in five words:

Kirk Douglas to Michael Douglas.


My spouse and I have been having oral sex for >25 years. Because it's a part of our private sex lives, we, like Douglas here, want to share this aspect of our marital lives with the world at large. When we host dinner parties we make sure our enjoyment of oral sex finds its way in the dinner conversation.

Martinkh said...

Maybe just having a sexy twat on your face makes you forget you have problems- or else he is talking about rehab exercise for his tongue...

gerry said...

There is ancient wisdom that, if obeyed, prevents this disease.

Presently, this ancient wisdom is not fashionable, so people get this - and other - preventable diseases.

And Satan laughs at all the misery he causes.

jr565 said...

Mike Douglas never heard of dental dams?
In truth, I've never actually seen one. Has anyone actually used one when eating the tuna taco?

kentuckyliz said...

You can use a piece of plastic wrap. Put tasty lube on both sides. Keep the lights on and mash that plastic up squishy like on that pink goodness. It's like when kids press their faces against the window.

Eat Salmon
The Other Pink Meat

kentuckyliz said...

When people were sharing the news story on fb, only the headline showed that MD got throat cancer from oral sex. I replied, maybe he should have got fewer blow jobs.

'Cuz I'm classy like that.

Maybe he rimmed Farrah Fawcett.

Nancy Kathlene said...

PV has been linked to an increased risk of cardiovascular disease. In addition, HPV 16 and 18 infections are strongly associated with an increased risk of developing throat cancer. genital warts treatment