February 19, 2013

"When my wife and I met in college, the attraction was immediate, and we quickly became inseparable."

"We had a number of things in common, we came from the same large metropolitan area, and we both wanted to return there after school, so everything was very natural between us. We married soon after graduation, moved back closer to our families, and had three children by the time we were 30. We were both born to lesbians, she to a couple, and me to a single woman."

You see where this is going? Blah blah blah... "I can't help but think 'This is my sister' every time I look at her now...."

79 comments:

BDNYC said...

"This is a seminal question ..."

Hahahahaha

Freder Frederson said...

I think Dear Prudence got punked.

mccullough said...

Forget it, Jake. It's Chinatown.

NitneLiun said...

Fiction. I think those Yalies who used to send absurd letters to "Dear Abby" have struck again.

EMD said...

We were working out ancestry/family trees one day at my parents and discovered that they are, indeed (distant) cousins.

edutcher said...

Read "Moll Flanders" or "Tom Jones".

This is hardly new territory, but it shows why the old-fashioned Mom, Dad, and dependent children nucular fambly is still better than all the new modern constructs.

Mitchell the Bat said...

If he found out before he got married then he could have kept it casual.

BDNYC said...

Their marriage has now been voided and they should be put in jail if they continue to engage in illicit consanguineous sexual relations.

Revenant said...

I seldom have cause to say this, but I agree with Freder. This is a phony story.

EMD said...

They should just check in at the Hotel New Hampshire.

edutcher said...

Sounds more like Hotel California.

Now, if not then.

Palladian said...

All this and more in Armistead Maupin's new book, Interminable Tales Of The City...

rhhardin said...

Move to Alabama.

Bob Ellison said...

There was (is) a comedian who used to say something like "Alabama, talk about Darwin's kitchen. There are people there who are their own fathers."

Nonapod said...

EMD said...

We were working out ancestry/family trees one day at my parents and discovered that they are, indeed (distant) cousins.


Technically we're all at least 50th cousins to each other.

EDH said...

They should research the past tour itineraries of Crosby, Stills & Nash.

caplight45 said...

Legal question: What constitutes the consummation of a marriage now? Is anal intercourse for gay men required and has that been stipulated in the laws of states that have SSM? What about lesbians? Do they have to strap on the old dildo to make it legit? Again have states modified their laws to accommodate this? Has the idea of a physical consummation been dropped for all marriages?

caplight45 said...

Legal question: What constitutes the consummation of a marriage now? Is anal intercourse for gay men required and has that been stipulated in the laws of states that have SSM? What about lesbians? Do they have to strap on the old dildo to make it legit? Again have states modified their laws to accommodate this? Has the idea of a physical consummation been dropped for all marriages?

Inga said...

If the story is indeed true, what difference does it make now? A la Hillary Clinton.

With artificial insemination and sperm doners, it's bound to happen. Hopefully couples can find out who their donor fathers are before they marry. He should let his wife/ sister know and I agree, keep it from the children, they should never know. Perhaps genetic testing can rule out some of their worries, even though they won't have anymore children.

kentuckyliz said...

I've always thought this about sperm banks...and Johnny Appleseeds.

If you have a child/ren with a Johnny Appleseed, you have to keep monitoring who else is popping out their spawn, names, birthdates, their whereabouts, to keep your kid from committing incest someday.

I have a couple of friends who had a spawn of Johnny Appleseed and it's a part time job trying to keep track of all that.

Manwhores.

Renee said...

Most people who know they are of sperm donor origins, ALWAYS ask questions.

Considering both knew.... this is fiction.

I could see this happening if each were raised by a heterosexual couple, and the men were social fathers, but not biological.

Renee said...

Some people have family trees, many today have family webs.

Rocketeer said...

They should just check in at the Hotel New Hampshire.

So we're agreed that John Irving is sucky hack of a "writer"?

DADvocate said...

Brings me back to one of my favorit teen movie comedies, Say It Isn't So and my favorite quote from it: Jimmy Mitchelson: He wants to marry his sister.
Freddy: He better not come back.
Jimmy Mitchelson: Yeah, that's right, or we'll tie you to a tree, fuck you in the ass while we jerk you off. Show you what we really do to perverts around here.

Rob said...

So Dear Prudence's advice is pretty much the same as that given by Ernie Anastos: Keep fucking that chicken!

GrandpaMark said...

Red Foxx said>:
Son, sit down. Years ago I was a wild,wild man, and Louella, too, is your half sister, you cannot marry her.....

virgil xenophon said...

Brave New World, sportsfans, Brave New World...

Everybody happy?

Ah, progress..

AprilApple said...

born freeeee ... without any of the icky Y chromosome.
oh wait...

EDH said...

Jury awards mystery writer Patricia Cornwell $50.9M

Tuesday, February 19, 2013

Best-selling author Patricia Cornwell has been awarded $50.9 million after a federal court jury unanimously found that accounting and business management firm Anchin, Block & Anchin LLP acted negligently and in breach of its fiduciary duties in managing the financial affairs of her and her partner, Dr. Staci Gruber.

“We are deeply gratified by this victory,” Cornwell said in a statement. “This case was about a lot more than financial mismanagement. It is our belief that Anchin, Block & Anchin not only took advantage of us, they also tried to damage our reputations and put us in legal jeopardy.”

Cornwell’s lawsuit accused the firm of gross mismanagement of her and Gruber’s money over four-and-a-half years, which resulted in the loss of millions of dollars. Gruber is a neuroscientist at McLean Hospital.

Cornwell, who has sold more than 100 million books worldwide, said the seven-week trial was “extremely painful and expensive” to go through and that “it would have been far easier to settle or walk away, but we felt we owed it to ourselves and to others who have been victimized by financial advisors to have our day in court.”

A portion of the monetary verdict will go to McLean Hospital for psychiatric research, Cornwell said, adding a federal judge may also award her and Gruber payment of their legal fees and multiple damages in a subsequent proceeding.

In a statement, Anchin, Block and Anchin Managing Partner Frank Schettino said the firm was “disappointed” with the verdict.

“In the days ahead we will be exploring our legal options including appealing today’s verdict. We continue to believe the firm acted professionally and appropriately. For more than 90 years the professionals at Anchin have built a reputation for honesty and integrity,” he said. “The firm will endure despite today’s outcome. We are eager to return to our business and continue providing the highest level of professional services our loyal clients have come to expect.”


http://bostonherald.com/news_opinion/local_coverage/2013/02/jury_awards_mystery_writer_patricia_cornwell_509m

sonicfrog said...

I haven't been this shocked since it was revealed that Princess Leia was Luke's sister!....

Oh.... Spoiler Alert!

madAsHell said...

nucular

George!
Is that you, George??

George W. Bush comments at Althouse. Thank you for your service George!

Bryan C said...

Human genetics are pretty resilient. The imaginary couple's imaginary children will be fine.

Astro said...

Yeah, right. As if someone in that situation would write to an online counselor for guidance - and then trust the counseling they get.

Might as well start 'Dear Penthouse Forum...'

Inga said...

OMG, Edutcher is George W.Bush's SockPuppet! No wonder he is chronically wrong.

dbp said...

An incredible story.

rhhardin said...

Nucular is from the original Latin nucula, diminutive of word for nut.

Nuclear is from subsequent Latin nucleus, kernel.

Anglelyne said...

Slate. 'Nuff said.

Michael K said...

Considering that a large percentage of children in traditional marriages are not the biological children of the legal father, what's the big deal ? Women screw around.

Astro said...

Actually, I was kind of hoping the story would end by the guy saying he's a lesbian trapped inside a man's body, and he's considering a sex-change operation so he and his wife/half-sister can be lesbians.

This also reminds me of:
All You Zombies - Robert Heinlein

Renee said...

Michael, so you wouldn't have a problem with marrying your half sister?

As long as there was no chance of ever knowing?

With genetic testing on children, so common today. Eventually parents will find out if they are closely related.

Lydia said...

How did we ever get to anonymous sperm donation anyway?

Many, maybe most, countries don't allow it.

And all but the U.S. seem to have some regulations with regard to number of sperm donations per donor, etc.

SteveR said...

"Incest is best, its a game the whole family can play"

edutcher said...

Inga said...

OMG, Edutcher is George W.Bush's SockPuppet! No wonder he is chronically wrong.

Still trying to stir up that lynch mob?

Interesting I've used the Texas spelling and pronunciation several times and it was someone else who noticed.

And I'm right usually.

I've certainly cleaned the She-Wolf of the SS' clock often enough.

Inga said...

Of course you are Ed. Of course you have Ed. Of course you'll be wrong again and of course I'll point it out to you :)

Inga said...

And of course you'll annoy Althouse again and of course that will make me chuckle. :)

Revenant said...

I'm kind of amused at how many people seem to accept this anonymous writer's story without question. You need to think about how many unlikely events would have to happen for it to be true, versus how easy it is for an anonymous person to invent details of his own life.

Alex said...

Yoffe makes this shit up I swear. She spends all week typing up these fake letters.

Renee said...

Lydia, Late 1800s/early 1900s it was first done. Doctors were researching fertility, one saw that a husband had zero sperm count under the microscope. So the doctor asked one of the med students working in the lab to go in the back room and get him a good sample for the wife.

edutcher said...

Ann seems to be going through a rough time, as several of the other commenters have noted.

As for the She-Wolf "pointing things out", she was wrong about sugar alcohol.

Among so many others.

But, speaking of being right, it seems the woman poll worker being investigated for voting twice, now turns out to have voted 6 times, because Dictator Zero "has a right to be President".

Lessee, she's one of 19 being investigated in that county and there are 88 counties in OH.

Tell me again the Messiah won fair and square.

Synova said...

Apparently (and maybe someone already said this) there is a strong physical attraction between people who are genetically related. I happens over and over. What makes us "ew" to our close relations is that we grew up with them. We're likely to have the same reaction to people we knew when we were babies or they were babies even when there is no genetic relationship. This has also been shown with studies and what not.

So it seems very possible to me that siblings who are raised separately are likely to have a strong attraction if they happen to "find" each other.

As for the question asked... should he tell his wife... she probably knows that something is dreadfully wrong. Leaving her in the dark about what it is is a bad idea.

Synova said...

"Their marriage has now been voided and they should be put in jail if they continue to engage in illicit consanguineous sexual relations."

Really? That's ridiculous.

Marshal said...

Revenant said...
I'm kind of amused at how many people seem to accept this anonymous writer's story without question.


Is that really what happens? Maybe people do question - but since it doesn't really matter they treat it as a hypothetical.

Dante said...

We were working out ancestry/family trees one day at my parents and discovered that they are, indeed (distant) cousins.

Go back far enough, and we all came from the same initial life form, supposedly. The issue is doubling up on bad genes.

You need a bit of Mocha in that Latte, you know. (Big Bang Theory).

William said...

Woody Allen used to be a frequent contributor to sperm banks. He was hoping for just such an eventuality.

Fr Martin Fox said...

As perfect as this grist is for my mill, I am also skeptical.

EMD said...

We were working out ancestry/family trees one day at my parents and discovered that they are, indeed (distant) cousins.

Distant = 5th, who knows how many times removed.

I guess we can treat it like the Crawley/Grantham nuptials without the big house, the staff, and the trust funds.

Synova said...

To Revenant I'd say that it definitely reads like something out of True Confessions... and as I've met too many professional authors who admit that they started writing for money by making up stories for True Confessions, well... no I'm not believing it's true without question.

OTOH, it could be true. There are studies that have shown that people who are genetically related but raised apart have particularly strong physical attraction to each other. Why? Who knows.

And it's not all that outlandish to think that people in the same city might end up with the same sperm from sperm banks around the same time-frame and end up with children about the same age.

I'd have to go back to check if the story was that they met at the local (and logical to attend) college or at some weird random one far from home.

Dante said...

@William:

Are you sure his step daughter wasn't his daughter?




BTW, there was a great line in "ChinaTown," by Faye Dunaway , that is really powerful, with Jack Nicholson:

“Chinatown” …

She’s my daughter (Faye)

(Jack slaps her hard across the face)

She’s my sister (Faye)

I said I want the TRUTH! (another slap by Jack)

She’s my daughter AND my sister! (Faye)

Faye Dunaway made that scene (and, I think the movie), much as I love Jack Nicholson.

[Note, her Father had raped her]

Freder Frederson said...

BTW, there was a great line in "ChinaTown,"

You're about two and a half hours late on the Chinatown reference.

Dust Bunny Queen said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Dust Bunny Queen said...

Considering that a large percentage of children in traditional marriages are not the biological children of the legal father, what's the big deal ? Women screw around

Anyone remember the Farkle Family? Always made me laugh.

:-D

Revenant said...

OTOH, it could be true.

It *could* be true, sure, but the chance of it being true seems quite remote compared to the chance that an anonymous author invented a story. Quite honestly, "my wife and I are both children of lesbians conceived by artificial insemination" is, by itself, enough for me to be inclined to call bullshit.

How many lesbians were having kids via artificial insemination in 1980? Then the odds of two such children meeting in college in a different city. The convenient "sure we'll tell you who the dad is" policy, combined with a sperm donor who wants to meet the kid (who ever heard of such a thing?). And so on, and so on.

Geoff Matthews said...

About a year ago, she had a 'letter' from a man who was in a committed relationship with his identical twin, and one of them wanted to come 'out' to the family.
I swear she's airing the argument for a slippery slope really well.

Methadras said...

So funny, yet so fake. How do these people get married, are siblings, yet none of their 'parents' meet or know each other?

Deirdre Mundy said...

Dear Prudie,

My wife and I met shortly after the murder of her husband. We were instantly attracted to each other, even though she was a bit older than I was. I took over her family business, we married, and we have two beautiful daughters and two high-spirited, energetic sons.

I recently discovered that I was adopted, and have begun a search for my birth parents. I'm also trying to find the murderer of my wife's first husband. Lately, when I discuss my investigations, my wife has seemed really nervous and distant. She begs me not to be so obsessed with tracking down my true parents.

I'd appreciate any advice you can offer on how to handle this sticky situation.

Sincerely,
OT

Nomennovum said...

My wife may as well be my sister.

Methadras said...

Hey, who keeps deleting my comments? wtf?

Seeing Red said...

Didn't blood tests before marriage kind of test for this thing?

Wait long enough, they'll just compare DNA.

William said...

Didn't the Pharaohs marry their sisters and didn't their dynasties last thousand of years? I'm sure that if there was anything wrong with that arrangement we would have heard about it. This outdated shibboleth about not marrying your sister needs to be revised. Why shouldn't two people who truly love each other and have so many things in common and hav so many shared experiences be allowed to marry. I'm sure there are already many thousands of sibilating siblings who wish to shout their love but are constrained by this ancient prejudice. The Pharaoh Society needs a spokesman to lobby for their rights.

kentuckyliz said...

William--we, really?! I cringe at first cousins, and you're advocating sibling marriage?!

kentuckyliz said...

*ew (not we...damn autocorrect)

William said...

I would have wed my sister, but I didn't approve of her family. I wouldn't want to be stuck with in- laws like that.

Kirk Parker said...

"Besides, she really is my sister". --Abraham

Kirk Parker said...

k-liz,

I think your satire detector is broken.

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furious_a said...

Targaryens wed brother and sister for hundreds of years to keep the bloodline pure.

jr565 said...

Besides, she really is my sister". --Abraham


She's my sister.. (smack)
She's my daughter (Smack)
She's my sister... (Smack)
She's my daughter (Smack)
She's my Sister AND my daughter!

jr565 said...

WHoops, looks like Dante beat me to the Chinatown restaurant.

Revenant said...

Didn't the Pharaohs marry their sisters and didn't their dynasties last thousand of years?

The answers to your questions are, respectively, "sometimes" and "no".

The average dynasty length was around one century.