August 16, 2012

"The Flathead County Sheriff’s Office received a report of a person pulling a horse trailer with a truck on Montana 82 traveling at 80 miles per hour or more in a 45-mile-per-hour zone."

Meade reads the newspaper out loud, here in Flathead County, Montana:
A resident of White Rabbit Lane reported she was being harassed by her neighbor. She reported someone put a trash bag full of fish guts in the bed of her pickup truck.

A man reportedly head-butted a woman in a vehicle on U.S. 2 East in Columbia Falls.

The windshield of an animal control officer’s vehicle was struck by an owl on North Somers Road.

An employee at a business on Hungry Horse Boulevard in Hungry Horse reported a group of four teenage boys kept coming in, being obnoxious and inappropriate, spitting everywhere and making obscene gestures.

A woman called with a question about how to deal with the fact that her 15-year-old son was using drugs....

A group of teenagers were reported drinking heavily....

The Whitefish Police Department received a call from a man who said he had been told by an officer that he could not have his guitar case open on the street downtown without a permit.
I'm most concerned about the owl, specifically targeting animal control. The animals do not want to be controlled. It could get ugly. Also: Teenagers. They are getting obnoxious and inappropriate. Things are collapsing all around.

38 comments:

edutcher said...

Teenagers have been that way for about 4 years.

Idle hands and all that...

LarryK said...

Be very afraid if you see birds of a feather flocking together and staring down at you from telephone lines.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fjj32CavzU0

Freeman Hunt said...

That sounds like the police blotter where I grew up.

My favorite was a report that two teenage boys in a canoe were harassing a duck at the lake.

Matthew Sablan said...

Teenagers have been kind of crude and rude for way more than four years.

Paul Risenhoover said...

The windshield of an animal control officer’s vehicle was struck by an owl on North Somers Road.

remarkable journalism. the who is a windshield, the what is was struck, the when is apparently recently, the where is on North Somers Road, and the how is by an owl.

DADvocate said...

As Tim Bedore says, the animals are out to get us.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3LDnQpD_uFQ

JAL said...

I thought Montana didn't have speed limits.

How fast was the owl going?

john said...

You sure those aren't headlines from northern Wisconsin?

Lem said...

Must be the scenery.

DADvocate said...

I just like the names. White Rabbit Lane (Where Jefferson Airplane fans live.) North Somers - kinda like the DJ Sonny Knight. Hungry Horse Boulevard - where you'll find all the buffet restaurants. Whitefish and Flathead (catfish), two of the foods you'll find at the buffets.

We have a Fishing Gut Road and Lick Skillet Road where I live.

Palladian said...

All I want to know is if the owl's OK.

rehajm said...

I love it when the local police blotter is published in the local newspaper. It's such a wonderful example of the benefits transparent government! The citizens now know the owls are organizing their assault, and can plan accordingly...

Now exactly where did all that stimulus money go?

diane said...

Is there any way to avoid saying this?

"The owls are not what they seem."

Michelle Dulak Thomson said...

DADvocate,

Agreed about the names, though "White Rabbit Lane" suggested Lewis Carroll to me. "Hungry Horse Boulevard" is "in Hungry Horse." The main drag, I guess, and a lot more fun than "Main Street."

Wow, DADvocate, where exactly is it that you live? My folks (in rural Maryland) live just off a Fish Hatchery Road, but I don't remember anything as awesome as Fishing Gut Road (or Lick Skillet Road, come to that). There is, however, a Catholic church in the neighborhood; the side street on whose corner it sits is imaginatively named "Catholic Street."

Loren said...

"A man reportedly head-butted a woman in a vehicle on U.S. 2 East in Columbia Falls."

He must have been running real fast, or she was driving real slow.

Roger J. said...

Montana--where the men are men, and the sheep are apprehensive.

Calypso Facto said...

"A man reportedly head-butted a woman in a vehicle on U.S. 2 East in Columbia Falls."

He must have been running real fast, or she was driving real slow.


Well, obviously they met head-on!

PETER V. BELLA said...

Things are out of control and no one is campaigning on a law and order agenda!!!!!!!!

KenK said...

Now compare that list to the shit that happens nightly in Milwaukee. Those folks live in a paradise without even realizing it.

DADvocate said...

MDT - I live outside of Aberdeen, OH (which is already in BFE). You can see Fishing Gut Road in that map view. If you pan east (to the right) a little, you'll see Lick Skillet Road.

ErnieG said...

Dave Barry has been publishing items from the Flathead County police blotter for some time. They're always good for a chuckle to start the day.

Chip Ahoy said...

A large and imposing owl walked up to a police care and bashed in the windshield with a wooden baseball bat, tossed a note onto the front seat, dropped the bat at the scene and flew off.

"Get OFF my territory I'm TRYING to catch mice"

The note had scritchy-scratchy marks all over it like this >//<\<>\\//<\</// and smudged with owl poo.

Ann Althouse said...

"Now compare that list to the shit that happens nightly in Milwaukee. Those folks live in a paradise without even realizing it."

That's why a place like Milwaukee or even Madison isn't going to publish the law-enforcement round-up.

Dr Weevil said...

In Fishersville, VA (just east of Staunton), you can drive down Barren Ridge Rd until it comes down off the ridge and turns into Mule Academy Rd, then take a right on Tinkling Spring Rd to Goose Creek Rd. Only 'Mule Academy' strikes me as all that weird a name by small-town American standards, but it's always bothered me. I mean, what the Hell is a mule academy? Are mules teachable?

Roger J. said...

Dr Weevil--Mules are far more teachable than liberals. (sorry--high hanging curve ball)

MadisonMan said...

Those reports make me homesick. That's exactly the kind of thing I would read in the paper.

mariner said...

The animals do not want to be controlled. It could get ugly. Also: Teenagers. They are getting obnoxious and inappropriate.

You repeat yourself.

dreams said...

Whats this world coming to? Oh, the humanity!

Methadras said...

Oh how big city PD's pray for days like the one Meade read out loud in the paper.

paul a'barge said...

he could not have his guitar case open on the street downtown without a permit

Fascists.

David said...

My wife is from Columbia Falls. The school district is bigger than Rhode Island.

Bob_R said...

The owls are not what they seem.

Tibore said...

You want some great, terse reporting that's also funny? EvansvilleWatch on Twitter (@EvansvilleWatch). 99% of it is actually mundane Police/EMT/Fire responses, but every once in a while, you get a gem:

"EvansvilleWatch ‏@EvansvilleWatch
Posey Co: Intoxicated man drove his vehicle into side of house at 104 Cougar Drive. Backed up & hit sign. Now fighting w/ a female. #ewatch"


"EvansvilleWatch
Dispatched: Theft just occurred at Walmart on Red Bank Rd..2 males & 1 female stole 2 large bags full of deli food & 1 bag of movies #ewatch"


"EvansvilleWatch ‏@EvansvilleWatch
Update: No assault on NW 6th St. “Victim” actually fell face first into concrete, he’s intoxicated. “Suspects” were helping him up. #ewatch"


Sometimes, reading @evansvillewatch is like a combination of watching a reality show and witnessing a train wreck. :D

wyo sis said...

Our little weekly paper gave up on the police blotter. It was embarrassing to people.
Not kidding.
Now we have a sort of society page with dark hints about things that might have happened, but not to anyone we know personally. Of course, everyone knows everything the nano second after it happens anyway.

Dan said...

Was Chad "Ochocinco" Johnson up in Whitefish.
I used to live in Havre, MT., On Hwy 2 (It's a nice drive back to Wisconsin, if you are not in a hurry)
I used to vacation in Glacier and the surrounding areas.
I used to coach cross country and track in Havre and our shortest 1 way trip was about 180 miles and other times, you would have to sleep over night because of the distances. During football playoffs, when a team from the northeast MT. have to travel to a school in the far southwest part of the State, it would take them 2-3 days to get to the game. Ahh, those were the days.

Carnifex said...

I find it suspicious that the race of these hooligans was not indicated. Not once. What exactly is the left wing media trying to hide? We know...we know.

Michael K said...

"The windshield of an animal control officer’s vehicle was struck by an owl on North Somers Road."

Hitting a heavy bird on a windshield is no joke. I once hit a pheasant in South Dakota going 100 miles an hour at 5 AM in September on my way to Idaho. It hit right in front of my face but high enough so it went over the car, a 1959 Cadillac. Six inches lower and my story would have...

Bruce said...

"The windshield was struck by an owl"?

Not impossible, I guess. His truck could have been parked, with the owl dive-bombing him.

But "Owl struck by truck's windshield" seems more likely to be an accurate wording.