July 20, 2012

The "Dull Men's Club."

"Dull-men's groups—and the sentiment behind them—have been around for some time."
No topic is too small or large. ...

"I have a question," piped up Scott MacInness, a 75-year-old retired machinist. "We have a person living up near where I am who apparently isn't carrying a full sea bag. How do we get this person to stop throwing all their trash in the recycling tub?"

Suggestions ranged from "stand out there sometime" to "get inside the thing and when he opens it, go 'aha!' "

Mr. MacInness hopped up to refill his coffee.

"Can I ask you a question?" another man shouted to him. "Why do you carry a spoon?"

Mr. MacInness tapped his pocket and confirmed that he does indeed faithfully carry a spoon. "Because you can't stir a cup of coffee with that little brown plastic straw! It will not make the sugar mix!"

"What the hell you need sugar for?" shouted another member, igniting a conversation about the taste of black coffee.

19 comments:

ricpic said...

The talk can't get too small for me. Life's in the small things. Useless to tell that to the big dreamin' young.

edutcher said...

Is Jackie Vernon a member?

Michael Haz said...

Oh Lord, I want to belong to a Dull Men's Club.

A blog, I must start a blog. A Dull Men's Blog.

Meh. There already is one.

Thank goodness, I say. I am far to dull to start a blog, anyway.

wyo sis said...

We call it the faculty room.

EMD said...

Was Larry David there?

m stone said...

Go to a local McDonald's most weekday mornings and you'll find the informal "clubs" in action. Inaction?

William said...

By my standards, they're flamboyant thrill seekers. Perhaps Adam could give a guest lecture on the creeping menace of unauthorized lawn signs to show them the heights of blandness that real yawn generators can achieve.

rcocean said...

Didn't Andy Rooney start it?

ampersand said...

I'd like to own a bar named the
Dew Drop Dead.

"Bartender do you serve crab here?"

"Exclusively. Now shut up,sit down,
and order.

Don't bug the other patrons or me with any small talk and smoke em if you got em."

I would keep a baseball bat behind the bar for the first bluenose that complained about the smoke.

David said...

What's boring about that?

Nora said...

Ah, people without pretences are not dull, but refreshing.

Estragon said...

See, this is why women aren't invited to the Dull Men's Club meetings.

sydney said...

Sounds like an Althouse cafe.

Largo said...

It's hot in Hong Kong today.

Largo said...

Tits.

Where's Titus?

Largo said...

There are at least sixteen ways to skin a cat, but not more than twenty-three.

More research is needed.

ndspinelli said...

Sounds like My Dinner w/ Andre.

Methadras said...

How does a meeting of Dull Men go?

[Dull man #1] Hey, how's it going?

[Dull man #2] Eh.

[Dull man #1] That's cool. So you go see that new movie that just opened up?

[Dull man #2] Not really.

[Dull man #1] So how long you been a member here?

[Dull man #2] Not long.

[Dull man #1] So, how do you like it so far?

[Dull man #2] It's okay. Everyone here is so dull.

[Dull man #1] Pretty cool, right?

John Bragg said...

I got about 3/4 of the way through before realizing it wasn't a below-average Onion article.

I just rechecked, and in my defense, it did say "Area Man" in the title.