June 15, 2011

"Can we call the men who engage in this sort of sucking-up to women 'Uncle Tims'?"

Ha.

Reminds me of this Rush riff from Monday.
Look, even liberal men want to get the girl. There's something universal about men and women, the guy wants to get the girl. When your target is a liberal woman, look at what you have to do. I've been there, folks, I've been there. I've put this to the test. I've told you about this.

I actually gave a woman I was dating in Kansas City once a book by Susan Brownmiller, who wrote at the time the definitive book on rape, and her thesis was that it's not sex, it's violence. I didn't care. That's what I had to do, you know, to get a second date with this babe. It's all it was. The guy always wants to get the girl. When you have the liberal woman that you want to get, oh, Good Lord, look what you have to do.
And I love the graphic:



Meanwhile, Hugh Hefner got played:
Hugh Hefner's wedding to Crystal Harris was called off after she secretly planned to ditch the Playboy mogul at the altar in return for a $500,000 media deal...

Harris, 25, was shopping for a big-bucks deal to tell all after she ditched hapless Hef, 85, in front of 300 guests at their wedding at the Playboy Mansion on Saturday, to be filmed for a Lifetime TV special.
Staged humiliation for the reality-show ladies.

65 comments:

Roger J. said...

poor old Hef--this is what your life turns into when you wear pajamas and a bathrobe 24/7 and drink cokes.

He made a fortune in purveying pics of naked women and as an old fart ends up looking like a schmuk.

Cosmic justice indeed.

Fred4Pres said...

Have I ever betrayed my sacred principles anb beliefs in order to meet and sleep with women?

No comment.

Fred4Pres said...

To my credit, I stopped doing that when I settled down and got married.

Fred4Pres said...

Hef managed to find out about it in advance...so I guess he gets the last laugh on this one.

Shouting Thomas said...

That Hef thing is a bummer for us old farts. Why can't the young things love us for our minds? And Hef is the most famous alumnus of my alma mater, the U of Illinois! Double whammy!

I was doing the "Uncle Tim" thing, too, when I was much younger... hoping for some reason I no longer remember to get laid by feminist women. If you wanted to maintain your hipster credentials, you had to put up with the shit from feminist women. Moping over the oppression of women seemed a sure fire winner in the competition for pussy back when I lived in San Francisco in the 70s. It did get you laid, but then you had to put up with the worthless women.

Two people pulled me out of this... and it's a surprising pair. My best friend for the last 35 years is a gay man. This may surprise you folks, but gay men like men. They don't just like sex with men. My friend got sick of my pissing and moaning over feminism and kept asking me: "What about you? When are you going to get something out of life for yourself?" Thank God for my friend.

My late wife, Myrna, performed the coup de grace on my Uncle Tim act. She absolutely loathed feminism. She grew up in the slums of Manila, and she didn't think American women had anything to bitch about. Besides, like most Filipinas, she thought that a white American man was a great catch, and that you should treat him well if you landed one.

She beat the Uncle Time act of out me. I can still remember the day we were standing in the Harley dealer, looking at at that chromed up Road King, and she was whispering in my ear:

"Buy it! Buy it now!"

She wanted a cowboy.

Roger J. said...

As I recall I had a frat brother whose approach to getting laid was to simply ask a girl if she wanted to fu*k. His rationale was that 9 times out of 10 you would get slapped, but you might get it on the 10th time.

Much cheaper, actually, than doing the whole dating scene.

MadisonMan said...

So did giving the book work? Did he get the second date?

My prediction: Crystal Harris, at 85, will be a nobody. No one will look at her.

rhhardin said...

NOW meetings were hot in the 70s.

Fred4Pres said...

With my wife I did not try to pander (although I was more of a moderate apolitical person at the time). And you know something, she gradually shifted from far left liberal to the right--as did I. Of course, paying taxes, raising kids, and dealing with the everyday BS of life tends to make one grow up and face reality.

MarkG said...

Old rich guys need to find a more age-appropriate gold digger. If you're 85, like Hef, look for someone their 40s.

Roger J. said...

Mad Man: I would submit Ms Harris is already a nobody and will continue to remain so--at her age she may be a pole dancer for another couple of years, but after that: finis

Scott M said...

"Are liberal women better in bed"

I've never been able to tell the difference in that regard. It seems to be completely driven by individual prowess. In other words, does ideology stop at the foot-board? I think so.

Shouting Thomas said...

Are liberal women better in bed?

The question has to be modified to: Are liberal women better in bed for more than one screw?

Because the reality is that getting along with another person is really what makes sex work.

When that other person is constantly bitching, trying to eradicate the male within you, and falsely portraying herself as a victim, more than one screw is probably a waste of time.

Chip S. said...

Hef: "I've learned a valuable lesson. From now on I'm sticking to women at least 1/3 my age."

roesch-voltaire said...

From my experience the id seems to have little ideology when in force, and the mystery is always what sets it off . In the seventies feminist wanted to split the bill before bedding, while conservative women desired at least a three star meal before retiring, but both wanted a good dessert with no heart burn. Poor Rush strikes me as one who has learned how the sugar daddy role also works.

roesch-voltaire said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Shouting Thomas said...

... while conservative women desired at least a three star meal before retiring, but both wanted a good dessert with no heart burn.

You live in such an hermetically sealed universe. This comment highlights how little you know about the world outside of your commie cell.

Conservative women, on the whole, do no such thing. You don't know any conservative women, obviously.

They wouldn't have anything to do with a sissy/commie like you, for good reason.

You are an Uncle Tim. No sane woman wants to put up with that kind of trash.

Scott M said...

In the seventies feminist wanted to split the bill before bedding

As Bill Burr has mentioned, the modern feminist (or those that THINK they're feminists, which makes up the greater portion, I think) approach the issue like a buffet. They want all the good shit that goes along with being a man, like equal pay and access to various career fields, but not the bad shit, like paying for dinner and movie, registering for selective services, or having to be the last one off a sinking ship

There's nothing about external plumbing that makes us more buoyant. According to yesterday's uncle Tim, women are supposed to be better at everything, so I assume that includes treading water. Can we bury that old male requirement and let it be men and children first?

Roger J. said...

Scott M: nice summary of the issue. They want it all with none of the costs.

My rule has always been to stay away from feminists (other than to argue with them which is always fun)
Lousy in bed and bereft of intellectual capacity, and only speak in slogans.

Always go for pentecostals--great in bed and the only downside they will try to take you to church on sunday.

bagoh20 said...

In the seventies it seemed like everyone was a liberal: feminist, environmentalist, peacnik. At least the fun kids, who broke rules were. If you wanted girls, you needed to act all Alan Alda. And so you did in their presence. Eventually it kind of sticks, because it works and you never got challenged on it. It was work to undo it, and took a long time for me, but the facts will eventually make an honest man embarrassed by himself. I would never do it now, and it is harder to get laid. I'm clearly still as hot as I was 30 years ago, so I blame politics.

Scott M said...

If you wanted girls, you needed to act all Alan Alda.

Even Steve Dallas got a perm and started handing out Jesse Jackson buttons in Harlem. Course, aliens had fucked with his brain, but...well, there you go.

bagoh20 said...

" Can we bury that old male requirement and let it be men and children first?

Children are pretty good floaters, so just men first. Besides with the men gone, I'm sure the superior women folk could fix that sinking ship and pick us all up later in time to buy them some nice stuff in the next port.

J said...

Rush Limbozo's lying as usual.

Everybody knows the successful WASP-conservative date starts out with like the male uh administering a few roofie-laced drinks to the designated female. Then the phunn starts-- . in Rush-bo's case Roofie-Tech works with Dominican rent-boys as well, enhanced with some viagra and his Pogo the Clown suit on.

Anglelyne said...

ST: Besides, like most Filipinas, she thought that a white American man was a great catch...

Like most women just about everywhere. White American men are a great catch.

Naturally, when I was young and single I would have preferred not to have the global competition, but I can't fault their taste and judgment in knowing a good thing when they see it.

Roger J. said...

Scott: thanks for the reference--Berkeley was a great cartoonist..His new schtick doesnt come close to bill the cat, opus, and steve dallas on the couch.

edutcher said...

Since I prefer nice girls, I haven't had much experience with feminists.

PS ScottM nails the equality thing. As I mentioned once, equality goes out the door when it's pouring and she needs to have somebody roll up the windows in her car because she doesn't want to wreck her hair.

PPS RogerJ, we thought Hef was a schmuck 50 years ago.

Shouting Thomas said...

J, you are beset by the most vicious, ugly and potentially violent fantasies.

You really need to stop smoking the crack. It's killing you.

bagoh20 said...

It does feel good to get all woman haters club now and then. 24/7 we have to watch, listen and read how much we are a worthless and dangerous virus on the species. I love when Althouse let's us play in the house.

Scott M said...

equality goes out the door when it's pouring and she needs to have somebody roll up the windows

In a lesbian relationship, who goes to check bumps in the night? The one with the least amount of hair on their head or the the one with the most hair on their legs? Same woman?

Roger J. said...

Damn, edutcher: you mean to tell me you didnt read that pretensious's "playboy philosophy?"

That idiot actually regarded himself as a philosopher--well so does Noam Chomsky, so they are in good company.

Me? just went to the centerfold.

Roger J. said...

ScottM: you have just described all Portland women--Bad Scott

chezmoi said...

I took a Portuguese class a few years ago. The teacher, a woman from Brazil, assigned us each speech topics. Mine was "Why do American men prefer foreign women?"

I was a bit insulted by that and, having lived abroad for many years, had a pretty good idea of what was really going on.

I modified the topic slightly and instead gave my speech on, "Why do foreign women prefer American men?"

Which is because American men are the nicest guys in the world who treat women better than men anywhere else.

Scott M said...

Which is because American men are the nicest guys in the world who treat women better than men anywhere else.

I'll see your conclusion and raise you a trailer park and a housing project.

Anglelyne said...

I thought the original "Uncle Tim" was Tim Wise, that white-hating white guy. Can work for any groveler, though. That Wise guy probably grovels to all PC-approved "victims", anyway.

edutcher said...

Roger J. said...

Damn, edutcher: you mean to tell me you didnt read that pretensious's "playboy philosophy?"

That idiot actually regarded himself as a philosopher--well so does Noam Chomsky, so they are in good company.

Me? just went to the centerfold.


We did, too, but, back then, Hef was forever on the talk shows with Carson or David Frost sounding like he really thought this was intelligent stuff, so you didn't have to buy the rag for that.

AllenS said...

What a terrible tragic story. Hugh never got to consummate the marriage.

No consummation. Bummer.

roesch-voltaire said...

Shouting your assumptions reveal your ignorance. For a while I photographed the elite and moved in circles that included millionaire Republicans-- some of them conservative women, who maybe didn't need the expensive meal, but did want the "bad boy" experience.Perhaps your lack of success with American women stems more from personality than politics?

Roger J. said...

RV--I simply dont understand your post--could you try it again in standard english?

Scott M said...

Perhaps your lack of success with American women stems more from personality than politics?

Perhaps, outside your bubble, not all conservative women are millionaires. More often than not, the more conservative women were just as hot in bed, but less likely to go there in the first place at the drop of a hat.

traditionalguy said...

Hefner sold women's images for money, and now a woman uses Hefner's image for money. There is justice after all.

Hagar said...

Chezmoi,

You should look up "Latins are lousy lovers" by Anonymous in the old Esquire.

Maguro said...

r-v, you'll have to let us know sometime how you went from bad boy photographer for the jet set to professor at a World Class Environmental Engineering School. It must have been quite the trip.

MadisonMan said...

Maher and Jane Lynch reading Weiner's IMing with the Vegas Girl is hilarious. It's on youtube, and definitely NSFW.

Seeing Red said...

"Buy it! Buy it now!"

She wanted a cowboy.



----------------------


I never watched Oprah. But I watched the show w/Sarah P.

Do U think it's a coincidence that steamy romance novels w/Alpha males r popular?

Because that was her show the next day. I actually meant to watch it, but didn't.

Seeing Red said...

R-V, R U actually suggesting republican women don't just do it missionary?


Shhhhh, don't tell your fellow travelers....they think they invented sex. & it would make their heads explode if the stereotype where shattered.


They've been consumed by what's below the belt since they were daisy-picking. That's their reason for being.

Do what u want

when u want

how u want

whenever u want


and no consequences whatsoever.


It's just sex, we're animals, fish gotta swim, birds gotta fly.

Seeing Red said...

47 y.o. hormonal teenagers


boomer hormonal teenagers


85 y.o hormonal teenagers


are not a pretty sight.


wv:glywific

William said...

As a general rule, men will do better looking for a wife at a church social than at a crack house. Likewise, women will do better looking for a husband in a consciousness raising group than in a biker bar. That's not to say that crack whores and bikers aren't more energetic sack mates than godly women and sensitive men, but life is a series of bargains.

Phil 3:14 said...

Maybe off topic and bit odd but I always assumed Sarah and Todd Palin had good sex. I don't know why.

Chip S. said...

Phil, the 5 kids may have something to do with that.

Also, she seems pretty happy.

Penny said...

"... while conservative women desired at least a three star meal before retiring,..."

Damn straight. And if you can't afford to buy me a cheeseburger, I'm sure you'll find your hotdog gal over there >>>>

Limits! We all have 'em.

Valentine Smith said...

I always thought Hef was a little creepy. Though he did claim that she, Harris, had a change of heart. Gentlemanly, that.

The broad actually has a manager. WTF! What's he manage, her coitus sessions?

WTF ever happened to self-respect? Lost in the quest for self-esteem, perhaps? Dr Phil what do you think?

Oh, and she was fucking Dr. Phil's son, her songwriting partner. If he looks anything like his father, this broad has an extremely serious kink in her libido.

Give her withered and parched or voluble and opinionated and she'll turn a fool into a chrome-laden trailer hitch.

She walks, she talks, she rolls on her belly like a reptile.

ricpic said...

Hefner sold women's images for money, and now a woman uses Hefner's image for money. There is justice after all.

Hefner paid every woman whose image appeared in Playboy. There was no trickery or coercion. This particular woman planned to make a killing by cashing in on faking Hefner out that she would marry him while plotting to be photographed refusing to marry him at the altar. A criminal conspiracy. Simply no comparison.

Loren Ibsen said...

"Always go for pentecostals--great in bed..."

All those years of snake handling.

(C'mon! You know you were thinking the same thing.)

Bruce Hayden said...

When it comes to dating, I have always had a preference for feminists, but not for liberals. Sounds schizoid, but not really. I like strong women who think that they can do anything. And, I am not as comfortable asserting traditional male prerogatives. It started back in college in the late 1960s, when I trained my girlfriend to open the door for me.

But, while I love strong women, I found that I did not like liberal ones. They either made too many decisions emotionally, including their politics. And, as a result, their values systems, however strong, were ultimately based on slogans, wishful thinking, and talking points. Never on reality. Or, they just didn't have any real morality.

The last really liberal woman I dated was while I was in Austin, maybe 15 years ago. I think, in the end, I just didn't want to spend the rest of my life listening to "shrub" jokes and the like (and, that was before Shrub got himself elected President). This woman, an accomplished attorney, and the other people at dinner, would just start rolling on the floor when someone would tell a shrub joke.

Since then, girlfriends have been conservative. Not intentionally, but just seems to happen. Indeed, most often it seems like politics is almost intentionally ignored by them, until we have gotten to know each other fairly well. It is almost as if accomplished women of my generation cannot be conservative, so if they are, they have to hide it.

Shouting Thomas said...

Perhaps your lack of success with American women stems more from personality than politics?

I've been married twice for a total of 34 years. Widowed both times. One American woman, one Filipina.

How many women do you think I need?

Penny said...

""Always go for pentecostals--great in bed..."

All those years of snake handling.

(C'mon! You know you were thinking the same thing.)"

But I wasn't. I dated briefly dated a pentecostal in college. He spoke in tongues! ;)

ampersand said...

Hefner has become the Mr. Burns of Porn. Possibly the only thing keeping him alive is Viagra administered through an IV drip.

I suspect that last bunch of blondes he was surrounded with were nurses trained in geriatrics.

I wonder if the playboy mansion is starting to look like Miss Havershams's house,locked in the 60's,heavily perfumed to try to control the old people smell.

Methadras said...

I actually feel bad for Hef. He got screwed by one of his own. Well, she pretty much shit in her own backyard at this point and it going to get hung out to dry by her own too. Hef will be okay, he'll be hurt for a bit, shrug it off and find another 10 hot blonds who will gladly line up to fuck him and live in the playboy mansion. He has the best life on earth and I hate him. :D

Methadras said...

ampersand said...

try to control the old people smell.


Seriously, what is that all about?

Quaestor said...

Roger J. wrote:
poor old Hef--this is what your life turns into when you wear pajamas and a bathrobe 24/7 and drink cokes.

No coke. Pepsi.

Quaestor said...

Tony and Hef discuss sexting

ampersand said...

Perhaps the next boomer related boom.

Old People Smell

Jose_K said...

Madison´s curse

Jose_K said...

revenge in the hot:
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-2003873/Crystal-Harris-cheating-Hugh-Hefner-updates-Playboys-Runaway-bride-issue.html

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