June 10, 2011

"Brooklyn thieves chop down sizeable shade tree to steal $50 bike."

That's the headline in the Daily News, for a story about a viral security-cam video. "Steal" should have been in quotes, because they don't even want the bike. One of them rides it for a 5 seconds then leaves it next to the chopped down ginkgo tree.
The sorry saga was captured on security camera video then posted on YouTube, where viewers from coast to coast posted unkind things about the Brooklyn boobs.
I clicked through to see what people had written, but comments have been disabled, and all the old comments are all deleted.

50 comments:

The Crack Emcee said...

There's something about this story I could care less about, and I think it has to do with that tree - or how people look at trees. This nature fetish is dumber than shit, and I get tired of hearing about it. I'm not saying these guys should've chopped it down (and I hope they get caught and charged) but fuck a tree.

MadisonMan said...

A sizable tree in Brooklyn is pretty small by Madison standards.

I'm not making the obvious Tree Grows in Brooklyn joke.

Sofa King said...

Well, this is why we can't have nice things.

Ann Althouse said...

"fuck a tree"

The value of a tree is relative to the minds of individuals. A street tree has the most value to the people who live on the street, so why did no one call the police? It was some kind of test of whether the people on that street cared about their tree. The guys in the video seem to have known that, because they hung around even as it took a ridiculous amount of time to chop down the small tree, which is valued as a "sizable tree" by the people who write for the Daily News.

E.M. Davis said...

Throw some Yakety Sax on that video and it's comedy gold!

traditionalguy said...

This is a great example of Alec Baldwin's high functioning modern man in action. His attention span is distracted. There is so much to steal and so little time to steal it in.

Scott M said...

One would think logging activity in Brooklyn would draw a good samaritan or two. Are there any left in that part of the city?

Joe said...

(The Crypto Jew)







Crack go read St Augustine. His greatest sin was that he and his friends stole pears, and then threw them away…they weren’t even hungry. They merely sinned for sinnings sake….the “tree” has NOTHING to do with it. Move past your new Age fixation./ These hooligans destroyed something, of value and beauty for no other reason than to destroy and despoil….THAT'S what makes the act so heinous.

The Crack Emcee said...

Ann, I understand the value of a tree. But people have made too much of this shit - they've made nature a separate thing to fetishize - and I'm sick of it. They pretend, if they don't "get away" to nature - a separate place and thing - they'll fucking die and shit. It's all so much crap.

These two assholes are thieves who damaged property - that's the story.

Fuck a tree.

The Crack Emcee said...

Joe,

I think we're agreeing - again.

Scott M said...

@Crack

As someone said when we were doing a thread on the world's tallest tree (somewhere in California, if memory serves), looking at pictures of the giant redwoods is just looking at pictures of trees. Standing next to one, on the other hand...well, there's just something to it that doesn't translate well into words.

Trees can certainly have intrinsic value that weeds and such can never have.

The Crack Emcee said...

Scott, don't start - I get it - but you know what I mean, too.

Sofa King said...

"Intrinsic value" is an oxymoron.

Scott M said...

"Intrinsic value" is an oxymoron.

Thanks for that, Grammer King. Everybody knows how much people love to be corrected on things like that. I appreciate it and will light a candle for you this evening.

Ignorance is Bliss said...

A society grows great when old men plant trees in whose shade they know they shall never sit. - Greek Proverb.

A society collapses when young men chop down trees just for a quick thrill.

Ignorance is Bliss said...

Thanks for that, Grammer King.

Technically, that was semantics, not grammer.

*ducks*

E.M. Davis said...

These two assholes are thieves who damaged property - that's the story.

Fuck a tree.


Most damaged property can be easily fixed.

The tree? Not so much. It's gone. Yes, it can be replaced, but you're not going to get the same size tree planted there. Maybe a sapling, but that will take years to grow into the same size as the original.

It's not a tree-hugging, thing at all. We've got more trees on this planet than we've ever had before.

I live in Ohio. I look out the window and there's frigging trees as far as the eye can see. Chop one of those down, and no one would bat an eye.

In Brooklyn, I would assume a tree would have a little more value.

Sixty Grit said...

Technically it is "grammar", not Kelsey.

Fuck gingko trees - they are Chinese.

EDH said...

I guess I had missed that episode of Fat Albert and the Cosby Kids.

Seriously, shows very starkly what happens when kids believe everything "costs nuthin'".

Sofa King said...


Thanks for that, Grammer King. Everybody knows how much people love to be corrected on things like that. I appreciate it and will light a candle for you this evening.

When somebody pointed this out to me when I was in college, I had a minor ephiphany. I was just trying to spread the wisdom.

Lincolntf said...

My trees know who's boss. They spit out a couple dozen peaches, plums and apples every year and then chill the fuck out.

Scott M said...

I was just trying to spread the wisdom.

How about "innate value"

edutcher said...

Anyone who's been in a city like New York or Philadelphia in July or August appreciates trees in the city.

That these morons would cut down the tree and then ultimately throw the bike away says something about how people like that really value nothing.

Also how stupid they are, they probably could have sold the bike for a couple of bucks.

Time to act on the words of Victor Davis Hanson and make poverty more uncomfortable.

edutcher said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
rick said...

"A society grows great when old men plant trees in whose shade they know they shall never sit. - Greek Proverb.

A society collapses when young men chop down trees just for a quick thrill. "


The irony here is too delicious to pass up. A Greek Proverb? About a society collapsing? Greece is about to collapse. But hey, they create outstanding proverbs.

nevadabob said...

"But people have made too much of this shit - they've made nature a separate thing to fetishize - and I'm sick of it."

You know what I'm sick of? Fucking black drug dealers destroying our cities for their amusement and black leaders like yourself who refuse to even acknowledge this problem.

Come on Crack. We know precisely why you don't like this video being shown ... and that's because it depicts the absolute inhumanity of inner city black men.

Nature fetish?

Really, that's what disturbs you about this video. The nature fetish aspect?

I don't believe you.

I think you hate this video because it embarrasses you as a black man.

And it should.

Joe said...

(The Crypto Jew)

I think you hate this video because it embarrasses you as a black man.

And it should.


Now THIS should provoke an EPIC response…..

Ignorance is Bliss said...

Scott M said...

How about "innate value"

I think you're missing his point. It's not the particular adjective you are choosing, but the underlying concept. Things have value only to the point that some particular individual values them.

Ignorance is Bliss said...

The irony here is too delicious to pass up.

I did see the irony when I made the comment, but didn't want to distract from the rest of my point.

traditionalguy said...

Is this a tree vs man more about tribal territory? I know that dogs mark trees as scent claims to territory. Men carve initials in trees. Settlers blaze boundary marks on ancient trees. Kids write their names in fresh poured concrete. But this alpha male just removes the damn tree to mark his place in life.

NYTNewYorker said...

This kind of thing will stop immediately when Alec Baldwin is elected mayor, believe it!

Sofa King said...

Things have value only to the point that some particular individual values them.

Exactly. The entire concept of "value" is subjective by definition. Without someone to decide the value of something, there is no value.

Chip Ahoy said...

The tree was blocking the view from their apartment to the bird's apartment across the street. It had to go. The 5 second bike ride was lark. So there you have it, tree, bird, lark.

ET1492 said...

All young men do stupid things. I don't think you can take this one instance of vandalism and conjure a whole worldview about it.

Give a boy and ax and he'll likely chop something down. Just ask George Washington's dad...

Methadras said...

It's a small evil, but an evil nonetheless. They didn't have to do this, but because of the evil that reigns inside their hearts everyone, including themselves loses. I've said this before, if these people spent half of their efforts trying to think up ways to commit acts of evil into actually doing good, think of what a different place we would live in. Doing good or doing evil require a choice to make, the distinction is, is that evil is so much easier to do than good. I don't personally think so, but it seems to me, that those that are like these people will always take the easy way out.

I hate to say this, but even Christ gave the sinner/evil-doer an easy way out and they still won't take it.

Ignorance is Bliss said...

So there you have it, tree, bird, lark.

So do you think the two of them were trying to get into her bush, and things just got out of hand?

Grim said...

I'm sure the comments were deleted due to a high volume of race based comments. You tube showing the race of most criminals has resulted in people in general being willing express themselves in a racist manner.

Peter said...

"fuck a tree"

BUT, it's really not a story about the value of a tree. Or even about the stupidity of petty criminals.

Its a story about the asymmetrical nature of most criminal acts. it's not as though the criminal is weighing the potential loss against his potential gain.

The whole point of criminality is, the criminal does not care about anyone else's loss. On the low, the value of a stolen GPS might be $25. from a fence, and why would the thief care what you paid for it, or the cost an inconvenience of fixing your smashed window? At the high end, a few dollars or an iPod might cost someone a life, or great bodily injury.

So, who's counting? Does anyone actually expect thieves to care what their acts cost others?

Trooper York said...

nevadabob obviously has no idear who the Crack Emcee is.

Crack has never had a problem with calling out other black's for being knuckleheads.

He is a lot like Bill Cosby.

Without the pudding pop.

shirley elizabeth said...

You can't murder a tree, as the story labels their wrong. You can only murder humans.

What a sad thing to watch people being so disrespectful.

Trooper York said...

It is a fallacy to claim that only "black" kids do this kind of shit. It is a function of age not ethnicity. The young guinea punks in my neighborhood would do the same shit as well as the PR's and the Dominicans.

We had a rash of graffiti last year. I positioned my camera to record the damage and it was done by a teenage chinaman.

It's age not ethnicity. A punk is a punk.

Trooper York said...

The real problem is these fucking bikes that these hipster douches think should control the city. The fuckin cunt who runs the Dept in control of the streets has put these fuckin ridiculous bike lanes on busy streets that are ridiculus. She wanted to shut down 34th Street for crying out loud.

They put two bike stands into the concrete in front of my store. Without my permission or that of my landlord. The bikes that people chain up there seem to be getting a lot of flat tires that can't be fixed for some reason.

Maybe these stupid fuckin hipster douches should take the subway or the bus like normal people.

Brooklyn ain't fuckin Madison.

Lyle said...

A with Trooper York on it being a male youth thing.

However, stats on murder point to a disproportionate number of young black men.

I was reading my old hometown's newspaper last week and out of the four murder stories written every single culprit was a young black man or group of black men. And almost always the victims are young black men.

So there is the youth factor, but it's coupled with a culture factor in some cases.

Otherwise the victims and culprits races would be more proportionate being solely based on youth.

Triangle Man said...

"Chinaman" is not the preferred nomenclature.

PatCA said...

It actually looks like one of the guys is trying to stop the ax man.

He won't last long in the hood.

ampersand said...

Throw some Yakety Sax on that video and it's comedy gold!


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B62jNMsTD-0

Ralph L said...

The bikes that people chain up there seem to be getting a lot of flat tires that can't be fixed for some reason
A punk is a punk.


Yesterday, the City hacked off the front of my 2 giant 70 y.o. junipers so they could replace the sidewalk. They took out about a 20' by 7' tall chunk, back to the property line. I'm right on a curve of the main drag leaving downtown, so the first thing everyone now sees is the underside of my bushes and a lot of bare branch ends. It won't grow back, either. I don't know whether to build a fence or force them to cut out the rest of the bushes and replant. It would be nice to sic their fucking Historic Commission on them.

Trooper York said...

You see you can call him a gook. Now not all gooks are chinks but all chinks are gooks.
(Archie Bunker, All in the Family, 1975)

The Crack Emcee said...

Troop,

nevadabob obviously has no idear who the Crack Emcee is.

No, no, leave him alone - he's elevated me to a "black leader"!!! ROTFLMAO!!!

Browndog said...

Chopping down a tree in the city is great fun--street cred--

Then, the tree falls, and they panic, like "what the fuck was that?"

Kinda like voting for Obama....just sayin'