January 20, 2011

"The 50 Most Loathsome Americans of 2010."

Allegedly.
1) You

Charges: Your brain’s been cobbled together over millions of years of blind evolution and it shows. You’re clumsy, stupid, weak and motivated by the basest of urges. Your MO is both grotesquely selfish and unquestionably deferential to questionable authority. You’re not in control of your life. You wear your ignorance like a badge of honor and gleefully submit to oppression, malfeasance and kleptocracy. You will buy anything. You will believe anything. You believe that evolution is a matter of belief. You likely scrolled down to #1, without reading the rest, because you’re an impatient, semi-literate Philistine who’s either unable or unwilling to digest more than 140 characters at a time. You think Epic Beard Man is a national hero and that Bradley Manning might be Eli and Payton’s brother. You believe in American exceptionalism despite the contrary, compelling and overwhelming evidence. You tacitly partake in all manner of atrocity without batting a lash. You’re actively participating in our species’ extinction and you’re either in denial or you just don’t give a shit. You escape into every sort of mind-numbing distraction and ridiculous, convoluted fantasy, so you don’t have to face the bitter, terrifying fact that your life is utterly meaningless.

Aggravating factors: The careers of Rush Limbaugh, Oprah Winfrey, John Stossel and Justin Bieber; the success of The Secret, “Medium” and Atlas Shrugged; the election of Rand Paul; the existence of Kentucky, Texas and “Sarah Palin’s Alaska.”

Sentence: Bad teeth, an affinity for afternoon tea and the guilt-plagued, nostalgic psyche of a fallen empire.
Click through to see who "you" beat. Barack Obama is on the list, but it's not exactly bipartisan. Great illustration. Good detail. Many pop culture and sports characters are included.

102 comments:

Ignorance is Bliss said...

You wear your ignorance like a badge of honor...

I resent the implication that I...oh, wait...never mind.

Freeman Hunt said...

When I was fifteen, I would have thought that list was clever.

prairie wind said...

#14, Obama
"dignified"

rastajenk said...

I made it only to about number 35 or so; found it so childish and derivative that I couldn't continue on. The poster "Murphy" is obviously pleased with his own turns of phrases, but it struck me as stale goods from the git-go.

If you're reading the comments before the link, take a pass. You'll appreciate the time not spent.

Earth Girl said...

Freeman, I agree with you.

WV: I would also think my word verification was clever - slocome

Mitch H. said...

Clearly written by someone who hasn't absorbed Jeff Bezos' parable about the relative value and difficulty of kindness and cleverness.

aronamos said...

Oh yeah, burning at the stake, shot in the head -- CIVILITY!

And it really wasn't all that funny.

Bill said...

I was shocked, shocked to find Sarah all the way up at #6. Didn't see that one coming.

They were trying too hard for "balance" to hide their ideology (or maybe they're just nihilistic) but they overplayed their hand and I think Freeman has it right.

Fifteen-year-olds, indeed.

wv - punizang. At which the author would surely snicker.

traditionalguy said...

The usual suspects were rounded up as filler material, but the animus was directed towards Boehner, McConnell and Palin for the sin of being the GOP's political leadership.

Phil 3:14 said...

Nihilism is so becoming.

This is the Bill Maher Schtick. At first blush you get a hint of bipartisan disdain (look, there's Obama) until you realize these are screeds from the far left.

And why is it that it always comes with a health dose of people are idiots?

I never understood the intellectual far left position that we need to create a just world for ALL men and women, even though they're stupid, ingrates

Fen said...

Another Libtard, another ignorant hateful rant.

In related news, the Sun rose in the East this morning.

jeff said...

I see obama made the list because he isn't liberal enough.

Fen said...

Today is the day for all the "civil tone" Lefties to denounce Democratic Representative Steve Cohen. Otherwise, don't bother to lecture us about rhetoric.

Henry said...

I do think ending with "1) You" is pretty clever. But 49 unclever diatribes is a lot of work to get there.

But an honest list would have ended with:

0) Me. I project.

The Drill SGT said...

not exactly bipartisan?

I counted 13 GOP Pols out of 50 and 3 Dems

Nancy P didn't make the list?

Patrick said...

Ann,

Just an FYI... The Buffalo Beast is run a asshole from NY. He is a rabid Anti-Semite. This is the freaking Douche Nozzle that wrote the so-called "Humor" piece called F#### the troops.

When I outed his ass, he e-mailed me and called me an "F-ing Jew" I forget the guys name. But he is one nasty person.

-Patrick

vet66 said...

I presume the author(s) include themselves in the number 1 spot. Do these people ever grow out of adolescence?

john said...

"2010 was the most loathsome year on record".

For Murphy, it actually got pertty loathsome after November 2.

Hee, hee.

lucid said...

yawn.

Joe said...

(The Crypto Jew)
I never understood the intellectual far left position that we need to create a just world for ALL men and women, even though they're stupid, ingrates

That’s not really difficult to explain:
1) That world view justifies THEIR power….the Sheeple NEED them, because the Sheeple are STOOPIT; and
2) BECAUSE the Sheeple are Stoopit, it justifies their failure to relinquish power, ever, because even IF the “just” world is created, the stoopit Sheeple will screw it up, and hence the Progressives must ALWAYS be there re-balancing the scales.

TosaGuy said...

A list. How original. Yawn.

Didn't read it....but I suspect it wasn't written by anyone who creates anything or has a position of real responsiblity or even has enough basic life responsiblity to not have enough time to write it out.

Fred4Pres said...

"You believe in American exceptionalism despite the contrary, compelling and overwhelming evidence."

While there are a few funny observations, they are buried in a lot of self loathing. And at the end, Murphy pretty much reveals himself.

The Crack Emcee said...

You believe in American exceptionalism despite the contrary, compelling and overwhelming evidence.

Except for that one (for obvious reasons) I agree with your chosen quote, wholeheartedly.

Sofa King said...

No "civility bullshit" tag?

The Crack Emcee said...

Oh, two things:

1) I didn't read the first 49 - it's The Beast (who came up with that name?) so I couldn't be bothered.

2) I knew, from the quote, it was written by, and they were describing, Leftists.

The Crack Emcee said...

"You will believe anything."

That was the tip-off.

lemondog said...

Nancy P didn't make the list?

Wasn't she busy with her American Idol gig? Someone said that she was a judge on American Idol and had a new kinda frizzy brown hairdo.

I don't watch it so I don't know.

rastajenk said...

Bill said...
I was shocked, shocked to find Sarah all the way up at #6. Didn't see that one coming.

Saint Sarah was #1 two years ago. I looked at the listings from other years: last year's Numero Uno, Glenn Beck; 2007, George Bush.

Hahaha, those lists are so funny I almost spewed coffee and crapped my pants. Whoa, that's some good stuff there....

Upon further review, not really.

AJ Lynch said...

If they picked 3 Dems, I assume they are Dems who are now deemed expendable to far left libs. I.e Charlie Rangel which is as far as I read.

Did anyone count how many MSM news readers are on the list besides Rick Sanchez?

2yellowdogs said...

Funny, well-written and hopelessly leftward biased. The author totally blows any credibility he/she may have had by calling ACORN "an honorable advocacy group for the poor".

rastajenk said...

Also, YOU was number 3 in 2002; so not only is the list lame, its recycled.

PETER V. BELLA said...

Reads like angry college kids with nothing better to do.

PaulV said...

So civility was a lie. What else is news

WV tratird: traditional turd

Saint Croix said...

That Bezos article was really good. Thanks for posting that.

The other thing I didn't read.

I have to improve my life now. More nice, less clever.

Sorry, Ann. I was mean to Ann.

TWM said...

"When I was fifteen, I would have thought that list was clever."

I swear that was my thought as well . . .

rick said...

I started reading the list, but then surcame my desire and quit.

Drew said...

Figuring out this guy's politics was easy. I have never known a right-winger who was so misanthropic.


I'm guessing #.5 isn't "Me, too."

bagoh20 said...

#1 Finally, someone appreciates me for me.

Ann Althouse said...

"When I outed his ass, he e-mailed me and called me an "F-ing Jew" I forget the guys name. But he is one nasty person."

Are there *any* Jews named Patrick?

jr565 said...

THe only reason Obama made the list was because he didn't measure up to his lefty credentials. This is,in fact nothing but a critique from the left. So of course, it's predominated by right wing characters.
Same with John Stewart a few months ago coming down hard on Barack Obama. At the time some people said it was a sign that he was objective and attacked both parties equally. No, in fact all of his criticisms were from the left. Obama needed to be attacked, not because Stewart was agnostic on liberal versus conseravative ideas. Rather, Obama didn't go far enough to the left, and promise things (lthings that lefties want) that he didnt' deliver on.

Also, as someone else mentioned, this is the same guy who wrote Fuck The Troops.So fuck whatever he has to say about the 50 worst anything. Hope he gets ball cancer (metaphorically).
When I did a google search on "F*ck The Troops" I came across an interesting phenomenon. Apparently there is a long line of op eds from those on the left expressing the exact same sentiment where they explcitly state, despite the claims to the contrary that they DOn't support the Mission (iraq) but do support the troops, that they do in fact support neither.That is the truth, and I'll give The Beast credit for at least expressing the true sentiment shared by liberals that most libs dare not speak.THat doesn't mean he isn't contemptible, only at least he shows liberals true face. And it's pretty ugly.

LarsPorsena said...

".."When I was fifteen, I would have thought that list was clever."

When I was eighteen, I would have thought was that the list was clever. But boys mature later than girls.

bagoh20 said...

2010 was an incredible and rewarding year for me, maybe the best ever. So good, I actually feel guilty. Mostly luck, but I ain't bitchin'.

The writer's anger is mostly self-inflicted ideological maladaptation (yes, I coined it). There are many cures on the internets, if you can stand the initial taste of the medicine.

Lincolntf said...

Real classy commenters over at the Beast.

From something named DarthFurious:

"How the fuck do all these republicunts, “truthers” (whatever the hell that’s suppose to be), and anti-vaccine loonies even find this place? Do you just get up in the morning and google whatever the fuck the voices in your heads tell you to?

I think next year Ian should give you useless gold-bricking pussies something to REALLY cry about. Instead of a “Most Loathsome” list he should just post a video of Mandingo (you know, the black porn star with the 14″ cock?) skull-fucking Sara Palin, with her husband Todd being forced to watch and then suck cum out of her bloody eye sockets.'

Thank God for the new civility.

Leland said...

I didn't read the list. Just one more person, who's life apparently sucks a lot worse than mine. And I have no desire to allow my life to equally suck, so that they won't call me loathsome.

virgil xenophon said...

Pretty much in agreement with Freeman Hunt et al here on the sophomoric leftist vapidity of the critique, HOWEVER, like the fact that a stopped watch is correct twice a day, blind pigs find acorns, etc., I DO, in fact, TOTALLY AGREE with his assessment of "LOST."

Paddy O said...

Ah, the trappings and temptations of fame. After being person of the year in 2006, I guess I just became too full of myself, thinking anything was possible. No one could get in my way. The women, the drink, the extravagant flipping of homes, the hope that I'm the change that I need to hope for if I want to change hope. It finally caught up to me.

But now? I'm loathsome. Look away.

bagoh20 said...

"Mandingo (you know, the black porn star with the 14″ cock?)"

Ahhhh, no Darth, I don't know of him. Why do you?

Paddy O said...

But why is the punishment to become English?

Fernandinande said...

Somebody took the time to write all those words.

Diamondhead said...

Boring leftist hates people. Zzzzzzz.

Hoosier Daddy said...

Are there *any* Jews named Patrick?

It IS possible Professor. They aren't all named Saul or Schlomo.

David said...

My favorite part is where he "sentences" Sarah Palin to be shot in the head.

The new civility.

MadisonMan said...

A sentence of Lung Cancer is pretty mean. A sentence of Dancing with the Stars, though, for Charlie Rangel, made me chuckle.

John Burgess said...

So, Daily Beast aspires to take over the slot now held by Parade magazine! Who knew?

WV: cogout. Well, actually, more than one cog.

Hoosier Daddy said...

A sentence of Lung Cancer is pretty mean.

Calling someone ugly or fat is mean, MadisonMan.

Wishing lung cancer on someone for no other reason than a dislike for their political beliefs is just disgusting; a seemingly common trait among leftists these days.

edutcher said...

Obviously, these people never looked in a mirror.

Newsweek is so lucky to have Tina Brown.

Ann Althouse said...

"When I outed his ass, he e-mailed me and called me an "F-ing Jew" I forget the guys name. But he is one nasty person."

Are there *any* Jews named Patrick?


You might be surprised. After all, when we were in grade school, the Lord Mayor of Dublin was a Jew, Sir Robert Briscoe (a fact that tickled my Irish Catholic mother endlessly).

bagoh20 said...

Yea, that wishing of death and horrible diseases on people is a leftist cliche now. You can't be old enough to know people who have suffered and still say those things unless you you're just evil or stupid.

MikeR said...

Pathetic. I remember when I was on the Berkeley campus, there was a local comedian who used to come on campus wearing a barrel and open a newspaper, read stories, and heap scorn on them. Didn't matter what they said. "Fireman saves five children. Well, I bet he's really proud of himself! Tells everyone he's a hero! What a loser!"

Haven't thought about him for a while, but this kind of stuff brings me back.

Daniel Fielding said...

I made the mistake on clicking on the link- 5 minutes of my life lost.
A pathetic waste of time

Paddy O said...

"the Lord Mayor of Dublin was a Jew, Sir Robert Briscoe (a fact that tickled my Irish Catholic mother endlessly)"

But, he wasn't named Patrick. Wikipedia gives a list of Jewish Irish. Not a single Patrick, Padraig, or Paddy in the list.

It's a particularly Christian, Catholic, Irish name, making it reasonable it's not a name ever to be chosen by Jewish parents. I'm siding with Althouse on this one.

That'd be a good theme for a documentary: Looking for a Jewish Patrick.

Converts don't count.

edutcher said...

Never go by Wiki, Padraic. It's even more full of holes than Imdb.

PS Simply because they don't have the name on it, doesn't mean there isn't one.

How many Irish Jews named Robert do they mention?

PaulV said...

I am afraid I left a comment to article:
You left out Nancy Pelosi, Rahmbo, Reid, Palinoia victims like Krugman and Other NYTimes staffers, Cohen D-TN. I like your homophobia bashing. Are you unaware the incident you cited involve no underage interns or sex but only emails? If you want to bvash homosexual why leave out Franks who home as used as bothel and Studds who raped an idea after getting him drunk. As an anti-semite you would get bonus point for your hate.

Diamondhead said...

I don't think the type of person who would call someone an "effing Jew" is the type of person who knows/cares whether the target is actually a Jew.

Hoosier Daddy said...

But, he wasn't named Patrick. Wikipedia gives a list of Jewish Irish. Not a single Patrick, Padraig, or Paddy in the list.

Are you impling that Jewish parents stick with a list of approved Jewish names? I used to work with a Chinese guy (both parents were Chinese) and his name is David. That is his birthname. It wasn't Hu Tao Ping but my friends call me Dave for short.

lemondog said...

That'd be a good theme for a documentary: Looking for a Jewish Patrick.

Patrick Aleph

DNA required?

Lincolntf said...

Better question, can we find an Irishman named Menachem?
Or maybe a Shmuel O'Hannigan?

Paddy O said...

Are you implying that Jewish parents stick with a list of approved Jewish names?

Nope. I don't think there's a list of approved names.

It's not a anti-Semitic, stereotyping thing. It's just a funny thing Althouse pointed out, that I agree with.

There's no rule against it, but I suspect it's just a name that isn't chosen by the chosen.

Maguro said...

How 'bout film critic Patrick Goldstein?

Sounds pretty Jewish.

Paddy O said...

"Patrick Aleph"

Answer given!

It'd be a short documentary. :-)

Paddy O said...

"Sounds pretty Jewish."

Oh sure, we find one Jewish man named Patrick, and suddenly everyone named Patrick "sounds Jewish."

Patrick said...

""When I outed his ass, he e-mailed me and called me an "F-ing Jew" I forget the guys name. But he is one nasty person."

Are there *any* Jews named Patrick?"

Heh!

No, Sorry Ann, I am quite the redneck. ;-P

-Pat

Paddy O said...

"Better question, can we find an Irishman named Menachem"

The sixth president of Israel was an Irishman from the North named Chaim.

I also learned from Wikipedia that Daniel Day Lewis is Jewish. And Daniel Radcliffe is half-Jewish, and semi-Irish.

Patrick said...

Whoa!...

Ya'll need to chill on the Jew humor now...

Might get Pamela Geller upset or worse Debbie Schlussel in a rage!

....and believe me... that would NOT be a good thing man...

*Shiver*

Lincolntf said...

We need a term for the condition of having a name that is funnily incongruous with the traditional and ethnic names of one's heritage.

mariner said...

I was shocked, shocked to find Sarah all the way up at #6. Didn't see that one coming.

I didn't either.

I was shocked to see her all the way DOWN at #6.

mariner said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
1jpb said...

I know someone from Taiwan, his name is 'Jack.'

His name before coming here was Quan Min (which is fairly rare, most folks over there only have one character first names, i.e. Quan or Min, but not both).

Anyway, he came here when he was ten, or so. He chose his new name because he liked Jack Tripper, who he'd seen on the tube in Taiwan. I'm not sure that Amy Chua would approve.

mariner said...

I DO, in fact, TOTALLY AGREE with his assessment of "LOST."

As do I and everyone I know who followed that show.

1jpb said...

Actually, as I think about it, it was his last name that was unusual for having two characters.

Jack Chang Chin, formerly Quan Min Chang Chin.

Clyde said...

Epic douche fail.

And I believe that global warming, not evolution, is a matter of faith. Get it right, fuckwad!

Fen said...

Fred: While there are a few funny observations, they are buried in a lot of self loathing. And at the end, Murphy pretty much reveals himself.

Yup. Only remaining question is whether he's a Jared Loughner or Eric Fuller type. Not thats there's much difference.

Youngblood said...

Mad Magazine called; it wants its schtick back.

Hoosier Daddy said...

Fred: While there are a few funny observations, they are buried in a lot of self loathing. And at the end, Murphy pretty much reveals himself.

This ^^

Got it in one Fred.

lemondog said...

Leopold McBloom

Amartel said...

This list, like most things over at this Beast site, is a retread for retards. In case the idiots didn't get the message and marching orders the first, second, and third (etc) time around, this instructs them who they may freely despise (Tea Party people, Republicans, people who have embarrassed the Progressive Nation)and provides a review of the dishonest and uncivil talking points as to each.

"The author totally blows any credibility he/she may have had by calling ACORN "an honorable advocacy group for the poor".

What credibility is that?

Revenant said...

Eh, misanthropy was fun when I was a teenager. These days I just roll my eyes.

tree hugging sister said...

"Lung cancer" seems an douchey, easy out for a sentence for someone so clever, doesn't it? Like he ran out of inspiration or something.

The Jenny McCarthy snark was unexpected and refreshing, but Paula Deen?!?!?! Talk about innocuous. Must be the Huck connection getting to him ~ couldn't be the butter, because butter CAN be from happy, grassfed cows, producing lovely organic milk products.

Even a such bitter schmuck wouldn't pick on butter, would he?

Christy said...

Reading the list and remembering the debates over Tiger Mom, I began to wonder if this hate filled self-styled humorist ever played a team sport. How many of our frothing pols and pundits played team sports and learned to work together with those they didn't like for a common goal?

As to the "Patrick" issue, Althouse, forgive me if I am assuming incorrectly, but didn't you and your Jewish husband name one of your sons Chris? Sounds far more unlikely to me.

Paco Wové said...

This free ice cream really tastes like crap today, Mrs. Althouse!

Quaestor said...

Lincolnf wrote: We need a term for the condition of having a name that is funnily incongruous with the traditional and ethnic names of one's heritage.

How about comedic xenonomy?

Robert Cook said...

"I see obama made the list because he isn't liberal enough."

Well, he'll first have to become liberal at all before he can work on being liberal enough.

Freeman Hunt said...

My son's name is Toshiro. Maybe that's why the prospect of Patrick the Jew seems unremarkable.

Maguro said...

Juan Tyrone Eichelberger is a good one, too.

Mitch H. said...

Freeman - is it a family name, or are y'all Leiji Matsumoto fans?

Henry said...

@Freeman Hunt -- Toshiro is an awesome name. If we could go back in time and rename our first son we'd name him Tenzing. We ran that idea by him recently and he said no way.

Phil 3:14 said...

Just to clarify this is NOT The Daily Beast

Big Mike said...

Me?!? I'm worse than Kim Kardashian? Whoa.

Wait a second? If we're talking about loathsome, why isn't Gosnell on the list?

Freeman Hunt said...

We're Toshiro Mifune fans.

Freeman Hunt said...

And we love the name.

BDD85 said...

Sometimes I truly am sorry for clicking on these links. They are so repulsive.

The left succeeded last year in passing their dream legislation and set up executive branch despotism in government agencies, giving them unchecked rule over so much. And still they harbor hatred and wish so much ill on people on the right (or even middle).

The irony here is that the left is such an ugly stain on the history of our great nation. They created internment camps. They promote discrimination based on race and gender. They spit on troops coming home from Vietnam. They support infanticide. They marvel at the rule of Mao, Castro, Chavez, and Stalin. They view our Bill of Rights as an obstruction to progress.

How do we rid America of such filth?

Maybe they will all move to Cuba and stay there now that travel bans have been lifted.

Joan said...

Wish I had read the comments here before clicking over. What a waste of time.

drl said...

Listen to you fuckwits. The Beast is actually pulling punches - America has been rendered uninhabitable by the likes of you people. Instead of playing video games and fattening yourselves of junk food in your single parent condos, you'd have been better off getting the shit kicked out of you by a drunken Irish father would couldn't stomach having something with the intelligence of a slime mold carrying his name. This isn't about "libtards" vs. "cons" - it's beyond left and right - it's about abject stupidity and venality, gross narcissism and greed and the utter destruction by YOU, all of you born since the War - of everything that was decent in the world.