November 30, 2009

"What are you wearing? What do you want to do to me? What do you want me to do to you?"

If there's ever a scandal where your sexting is made public, I seriously hope whatever it is you've written is more creative than that. And if you're going to lie and make up sexting to attribute to somebody else, I hope you're not so lame — it's bad enough to be a liar — that you'd invent generic lines like that. Come on, people — cheaters and liars — raise your game.

38 comments:

garage mahal said...

"The ENQUIRER's blockbuster cover story was verified with polygraphs, multiple sources and an on-the-record exclusive interview with one of Rachel's friends."

LOL

Martha said...

"Her ( Rachel Uchitel) nickname for Tiger is 'Bear.' She lists his cell phone number under 'Bear' in her contacts.

Tiger's nickname should be DUMB if the National Enquirer story is true.

The Drill SGT said...

This the fourth time Tiger has been terminally stupid in the past several months.

1. not paying attention to Elin who is both Hot! and the mother of his kids.

2. taking up with a slut like Rachael, you just knew she'd want to kiss and tell...

3. Not begging forgiveness from Elin when she found out. (OK, I know this part isn't proven, but serious begging usually doesnt result in contusions.

4. The biggest. Trying to tough this out in the press when it absolutely won't go away. Son, You are pissing away millions in endorsments every day you don't get out on front of this. You f'd up. Take the advice of your Dad. Face it like a man and get it behind you. It won't get better till you do.

AllenS said...

Tiger: "What are you wearing?"

Rachel: "A blue dress."

El Presidente said...

The fact that her nickname for Tiger is the a derivative of the greatest ever golfer's nick name raises a red flag for me. It would be like Prof. Althouse's paramour calling her Sully.

Or maybe she is just and idiot, which certainly can't be ruled out.

paul a'barge said...

Monday challenge ... make stuff up ... what were the last 3 sext messages Althouse sent to Meade?

Maguro said...

Tiger always did seem a little robotic.

Ron said...

He could at least go old school with his sexting and talk about his "mashie" or his "niblick."

Jim said...

Anyone these days who is sexting while married is entirely too stupid to be considered an adult, and should be grounds for a take-it-all divorce. Like no one will be able to find these messages?

But then again, because Tiger never says anything that wasn't scripted and focused-grouped well in advance, we have no idea if he is smart or not.

AllenS said...

Ok, Paul, I'll give it a try. The first sext message:

Meade: "What are you wearing?"

Althouse: "Digress only to be funny/interesting. I will delete trolls and troll feeders according to my whim, and if you have an issue with that email me. DO NOT comment about it."

Fred4Pres said...

Men can sometimes go insane. Women have that power over us (well most of us). They should get a pass, at least once.

Lem said...

Disturbing sexting.

knox said...

Like no one will be able to find these messages?

Yeah... reminds me of the Climategate idiots shooting their emails back and forth. Beyond stupid.


I did an image search on this girl and all I can say is, "Porn Chic." I hoped that cheap look would die out when Paris Hilton's popularity waned. Apparently not. How exactly do men find over-collagened fish lips comely?

Florida said...

Let this be a lesson to you twits.

A Twit is a person who uses any form of technology to do they would be ashamed of if it became public (derives from Twitter).

Everything you write down using anything that requires any form of electricity is recorded somewhere in a log available to someone at a later date.

Everything.

If you type it ... you should assume it can one day be released at some point in the future at the most inconvenient possible time for you.

And if you use anything other than cash money that has never been inside a bank, a record is made. Just ask Eliot Spitzer. He paid cash ... but with money he once had in a bank.

Never write down anything you can say. Never say anything you can suggest. Never suggest anything if you can wink.

Period.

Facebook, Twitter, email, texting ... they're all just ways evidence against you can be gathered.

Almost Ali said...

I'd be surprised if the marriage survives. The dynamics have changed, the perfectionist (controller) has been subordinated. He'll go along in the near-term for the sake of his image, even his marriage, but he's completely out of his element as the contritionist.

m00se said...

Lem,

That was seriously disturbing.

Pogo said...

My preferred sexting:


Remember, I said no puppets this time.


What are you reading?


I often appear frightening at first.

Pastafarian said...

This can't possibly be true. Look at the man's wife, and then look at this spray-tan-orange, fish-lipped beast.

Tiger would have to be insane. Not just stupid, but deranged.

Joe said...

My God, this woman is ugly. Tiger may be suffering from Bill Clinton disease (who did well with Elizabeth Gracen and it went downhill from there.)

Or the story is nonsense.

Matt Eckert said...

Show me a beautiful woman and I will show a guy who is tired of banging her.

Pogo said...

As for the golf club, mebbe Tiger's wife was just trying to play through.

edutcher said...

The Enquirer often scoops the Establishment Media and is getting a rep for doing it (remember Men in Black?, same principle).

AllenS said...

Ok, Paul, I'll give it a try. The first sext message:

Meade: "What are you wearing?"


Althouse: "I'm bottomless blogging"

Fred4Pres said...

Men can sometimes go insane. Women have that power over us (well most of us). They should get a pass, at least once.

Sometimes?

Man must be Babylonian for crazy. As for women, their power is probably a lot more over-rated (Althouse, of course, is the exception) because it gives guys an excuse to say, "The devil made me do it".

Women, though, don't have any more control. Remember the astronaut who drove from TX to FL wearing a Depends to shoot her boyfriend's wife? (or something equally silly)

WV "sylly" Sir Archy's view of us uncouth Colonials.

Kirk Parker said...

knox,

"How exactly do men find over-collagened fish lips comely?"

Speaking for myself and others I know--we don't.

Almost Ali said...

To say the story of infidelity is wrong, is to say the National Enquirer has a death wish. Not likely, not even close.

Matt Eckert said...

"How exactly do men find over-collagened fish lips comely?"

Well for the same reason some men like pillow top mattresses.

It makes for a comfortable resting place.

traditionalguy said...

The mystery is the power of Whores to say quite openly that a man should show his power and courage to risk destroying himself with their help. The once invincible Tiger fell for that ancient con as do most rich men sooner or later. God have mercy on the Tiger.

Ignorance is Bliss said...

Florida said...

If you type it ... you should assume it can one day be released at some point in the future at the most inconvenient possible time for you.

Good thing blog comments are never recorded, or we'd all be in trouble.

Ignorance is Bliss said...

Knox said...

How exactly do men find over-collagened fish lips comely?

It's kind of like the big neon sign in front of the cheap diner. The sign is not appetizing; it just lets you know that they are open for business.

Ryan said...

Well said, Florida.

HelenParr said...

Lyin' 'bout Tiger the 'Bear.' Oh, my.

ricpic said...

The guy can hit the ball 300 yards and keep it in the fairway. He has to be witty to boot?

ricpic said...

Show me a beautiful woman and I'll show a guy who is tired of banging her.

This is why hair dye was invented.

Ignorance is Bliss said...

Matt Eckert said...

Show me a beautiful woman and I will show a guy who is tired of banging her.

How about this one?

Freeman Hunt said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Freeman Hunt said...

Hoochitel could just be a liar.

"Omigod, ya'll. David Boreanaz is like so in love with me!"
"You told us that 300 times already."
...
"Omigod, ya'll. Tiger Woods is like so in love with me!"

Cedarford said...

He seems a good guy. Count me out of getting in a moralistic celebrity scandal tizzy..Let him sort out his private life in peace.

I'm giving Woods a pass...or you could say, mulligan..

rhhardin said...

Imus's Bernard McGuirk on Tiger Woods real audio, pointing out the billionaire with the big house being chased down the driveway by his wife with a golf club, ``He's one of us!''

John and Ken are of the opinion that Tiger has gotten no sex for a year and a half, real audio, which is always my suspicion with guys stepping out.

MamaM said...

...and the mystery beyond the mystery?

What if Tiger's philandering and lack of creativity in sexting is an outer revelation of inner overwhelm and lost direction?

May 2006: Tiger loses his best friend, mentor, and critic when his father dies. Tiger credits his dad as the man responsible for teaching him mental toughness and self discipline.

June 2007: Tiger's first child, a daughter, is born and named Sam. According to Tiger, his late father, Earl Woods, used to call him Sam. "We wanted to have a name that would be meaningful. My father had always called me Sam since the day I was born. He rarely ever called me Tiger."

Feb. 2009: Tiger's second child, a boy, is born and named Charlie. Charlie's arrival invites Tiger to re-engage in father/son relational dynamics from the position of father--a role he esteemed and respected as Earl's prior to his death.

Reasons are not the same as excuses. Tiger continues to be responsible for his choices, but IMO his disordered behavior of late seems to relate more to the changes, grief, loss and challenges he's experienced then to the looks or hotness of the current women in his life.