January 25, 2009

Sunday afternoon, at the café...

I'm reading conlaw, but maybe at the other table, a guy is being incredibly charming:

DSC09881

Some terrible 80s music is playing, and I'm inside the noise cancellation headphones:

DSC09885

110 comments:

Curtiss said...

There are people at this shrine.

rhhardin said...

Charming won't get anywhere unless he buys her shoes.

Palladian said...

Some terrible 80s music is playing

Hmm, that reminds me of an off-topic discussion I started when I posted a link to Supertramp's "Logical Song" in an earlier thread. The subsequent discussion regarded my compilation of the "Worst Songs Ever". In honor of the "terrible 80s music, I think I'll repost the playlist in here:

Althouse said: "But these can't really be the worst songs, right? Because they are fun to hear!"

Right. Just like The Logical Song, many are what I consider "bad songs" but also have something that makes them irresistible and unforgettable. Simply bad songs would not make an interesting list. There are also some songs on the list that are actually not fun to hear but are so egregiously awful that they deserve special attention. My criteria for inclusion is varied. Many are included for their terrible lyrics ("MacArthur Park", which I consider the worst song ever written - I currently have 70 versions of it). Some are included for their crude sexual or biological content ("(You're) Having My Baby"). Some are included for their hare-brained attempts to have a "message" (Indian Reservation) or their ham-handed attempts at philosophy ("I Am I Said") . Some are included because of their ludicrous production values ("The Candy Man" ) or their obnoxious performance ("Loving You", though this one fits into at least 3 other categories). Some are included because of their entirely inappropriate mawkish sentimentalism ("Honey"). Some are included for their amazing ability to be pernicious and tenacious irritants ("Coconut"). A couple are included for private, personal reasons. OK, here's my entirely subjective list of "The Worst Songs Ever":

"Afternoon Delight" — by the Starland Vocal Band
"Alone Again (Naturally)" — Gilbert O'Sullivan
"At Seventeen" — Janis Ian
"Brand New Key" — Melanie
"Brandy (You're A Fine Girl)" — Looking Glass
"The Candy Man" — Sammy Davis, Jr
"Coconut" — Harry Nilsson
"Da Ya Think I'm Sexy?" — Rod Stewart
"Dancing On The Ceiling" — Lionel Richie
"Escape (The Piña Colada Song)" — Rupert Holmes
"Feelings" — Morris Albert
"The Final Countdown" — Europe
"Get Up And Boogie" — Silver Convention
"Honey" — Bobby Goldsboro
"I Am I Said" — Neil Diamond
"I Am Woman" — Helen Reddy
"I Wanna Sex You Up" — Color Me Badd
"I Wear My Sunglasses At Night" — Corey Hart
"Indian Reservation (Cherokee Nation)" — Paul Revere & the Raiders
"The Logical Song" — Supertramp
"Loving You" — Minnie Riperton
"Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds" — William Shatner
"MacArthur Park" — Richard Harris (or Donna Summer)
"Midnight At The Oasis" — Maria Muldaur
"The Morning After" — Maureen McGovern
"Muskrat Love" — Captain and Tennille
"The Night Chicago Died" — Paper Lace
"One Tin Soldier (The Legend of Billy Jack)" — Coven
"Playground In My Mind" — Clint Holmes
"Seasons In The Sun" — Terry Jacks
"Shannon" — Henry Gross
"Sometimes When We Touch" — Dan Hill
"Sylvia's Mother" — Dr. Hook & The Medicine Show
"Think Of Laura" — Christopher Cross
"Total Eclipse of the Heart" — Bonnie Tyler
"Uncle Albert/Admiral Halsey" — Paul McCartney
"The Warrior" — Scandal featuring Patti Smyth
"We Built This City" — Starship
"What's Up" — 4 Non Blondes
"Year of the Cat" — Al Stewart
"You Light Up My Life" — Debby Boone
"(You're) Having My Baby" — Paul Anka

Roberto said...

Do these people know you take their pictures and post them here?

Seems like an invasion of privacy.

traditionalguy said...

How do you absorb so much around you with the sound cancelling headphones on? Your perceptions must be fine tuned to the College ethos. So You can still appreciate a charming performance when you see one, with Con-law running thru your right brain.That's amazing.

Palladian said...

By the way, when you listen to Rod Stewart's "Da Ya Think I'm Sexy?", make sure you are looking at this photograph.

JohnAnnArbor said...

*eye roll*

--Public place
--No one's easily recognizable

Hide the straws, Michael's grasping.

Ron said...

is our double-A lawprof trying to do the hook-up? Sweet! Spare us nosy Nates no details, mein sweet tortsprecher!

Sprezzatura said...

Your perceptions must be fine tuned

Definitely possible. But, it's also possible for perceptions to be wrong. Althouse, in her electronic bubble, doesn't know what's true here.

We do know what Althouse thinks about when she see that guy--no fine tuned perception required. Why she thinks as she does about that guy, not knowable.

[I'm headed down the Rumsfeld slippery slope: "Reports that say that something hasn't happened are always interesting to me, because as we know, there are known knowns; there are things we know we know. We also know there are known unknowns; that is to say we know there are some things we do not know. But there are also unknown unknowns -- the ones we don't know we don't know."]

john said...

Is this open topic? I would like to find out where the recently dismissed political appointments of the Bush administration have found employment. Especially his thief-in-chief, Hank Paulson.

Since having to sell his stake in Goldman Sachs for $200 million, tax free, prior to coming to Treasury (according to Wiki), I guess he can afford to rest up for a while before having to look for a new job.

rhhardin said...

Noise cancelling headphones don't put you in a bubble. You can hear stuff like conversations.

Machine and fan noise is way down, though.

LonewackoDotCom said...

In the back of the room... isn't that Bob? Does his wife know he's having a tete-a-tete with Stacy?

Just kidding.

I'm unsure of the rules for these various threads, but maybe Althouse would like to put on her law professor hat and see if she can find any holes in this argument.

To make it even easier, here's a simple three-point plan:

1. Note the FactCheck claim The director of Hawaii’s Department of Health confirmed Oct. 31 that Obama was born in Honolulu (factcheck.org/elections-2008/born_in_the_usa.html)

2. Read the actual statement from the state of Hawaii which says no such thing: PDF file.

3. Note the HI law allowing those born outside HI to get valid certs: link.

Did FactCheck lie? (If you respond, please only do so about the points raised above; no strawman arguments. Obama supporters: please try to be intellectually honest.)

chuck b. said...

Delta Dawn, A Horse with No Name, and Hotel California would be on my list.

I can't imagine what is irresistible and/or unforgettable about We Built This City.

(Please do not tell me.)

john said...

Obama supporters: please try to be intellectually honest.

I just found out that white wine is far better than red when it comes out your nose (in addition to being easier to clean off the keyboard).

The Crack Emcee said...

Let's get this straight: those are not bad songs.

Here's a song that's so bad it's good - which means it's not even a "bad" song - but it'll at least give you some pointers to the difference.

TitusPrivateDancer said...

I pinches two solid brown loaves today.

Each loaf consisted of one large piece of loaf about the size of a sausage as well as a couple of smaller loafs in the shape of a pebble.

Pebbles and Bamm Bamm.

David said...

The guy looks like he is trying to charm, but he also is shrinking from her, like a shy child wishing to ingratiate but waiting for the adult to close the distance. If he were a child, I would classify her body language as sincere interest. But since he is not a child, it could also be bold skepticism. Unless she is looking for a boy to mother, she might want to move on (after reclaiming her shoes.) Or maybe he just wants to be pursued a bit. That works well sometimes.

Darcy said...

Nice list, Palladian.

TitusPrivateDancer said...

I had a Bagel with seeds on it and as a result there were seeds in my loaf. Almost like the seeds were a glue holding the loaf together.

Isn't that sweet?

I tend to enjoy peeing on my loaf after Pinching it and watching my pee destroy the loaf in many little loaf pieces.

thank you.

Hector Owen said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
TitusPrivateDancer said...

A horse with no name is like a loaf with no name.

David said...

Althouse, on the other hand, is wearing earphones and reading a book about constitutional law. Now that would be a challenging pickup.

But she is also looking around the room and taking semi-surreptitious photos. That would make me want to try (were I not already attached.)

TitusPrivateDancer said...

Was Spandau Ballet's Lifeline playing?

How about Lies, Lies, Lies yeah from Thompson Twins?

Anything from Heaven 17? Style Council? Haircut 100? Human League?

ricpic said...

MacArthur Park, which I consider the worst song ever written...

Does anyone care about the lyrics to MacArthur Park? It's that long orchestral thingamabob that makes it work.

Hector Owen said...

Sorry, David, I'll put that back up.

The guy is holding her dog. That means so much. Or is it a dog? Are dogs allowed in cafes in Wisconsin? If so, that's a point for Wisconsin, then. If it's not a dog, then what in the world is it?

I think I recognize the woman with the blue, blue eyes, and earbuds, who is visible above the top of someone else's computer, a little to the right. Wouldn't mind seeing her again. (Kidding!)

Lem the artificially intelligent said...

Yo le tengo miedo a la profesora porque cuando menos espero ella me compunje.

E notado que ultimamente la profe no exime ninguna oportunidad para ensenar los ratros de el agua ardiente.

Yo bebo el agua ardiente para calmar mis demonios.

Yo solamente pido que no se me prohiba la entrada al unico alberge que me queda.

Althose es mi oro.

Freeman Hunt said...

Althouse, on the other hand, is wearing earphones and reading a book about constitutional law. Now that would be a challenging pickup.

Could be a bad idea. Most unwelcome pickup I ever had anyone attempt on me was while I was running on a treadmill while reading a book.

"Heyyyy, what you reading there?"
/pant /pant "Huh?"

Lem the artificially intelligent said...

Some terrible 80s music is playing

let the speaker be anathema.

William said...

She's a psych grad student. She wants him to masturbate in a MRI machine while she takes slices of his neocortex. He is intrigued but a little uncertain. She leans forward to close the deal. She tells him that she would love to see his neocortex when it is aroused.

knox said...

Rod Stewart confuses me. Palladian's list is great and very 70s-heavy. As it should be.

Ron said...

It's a bad song, but few songs sung drunk sound better than Delta Dawn...

Lem the artificially intelligent said...

I'm thinking about erasing my spanish...

But I'm thinking that is how I feel DESPITE my few drinks.. (yes you remember, pat yourself)

How do I apologise for something I'm only imagining?

TitusPrivateDancer said...

Have you done it with any of your commenters? Or maybe not "it" but a little nooky wooky?

I sense that you may have based off some of the comments here.

Lem the artificially intelligent said...

I'm afraid of Althouse because when I least expect it she will out me. (Althouse is compelling)

I've noticed lately that she will not exempt any opportunity to teach about the excess of fire water. I drink fire water to soothe my demons.

I only ask that I not be denied access to the only shelter I have left.

Althose is gold.

Lem the artificially intelligent said...

All the posting against drinking..
What the hell?
I know I get it...

Lem the artificially intelligent said...

Have you done it with any of your commenters? Or maybe not "it" but a little nooky wooky?

Oh Titus, come off it.

I'm the one blobiating here.

leave the professor alone.

Face it, you cant buy her that plane..

Michael Haz said...

Palladian - you list should include "Happiest Girl in The USA" by Donna Fargo.

Althouse, on the other hand, is wearing earphones and reading a book about constitutional law. Now that would be a challenging pickup.

Maybe. But if a 50 year old, handsome, wealthy, well-educated man walked into the cafe wearing noise canceling headphones...well it'd be interesting to say the least.

XWL said...

Can't really go wrong with Ronnie Spector, though that album cover is frightening.

(I went to the same Junior High as her daughter, she was voted class clown in 9th grade, female division, don't know why they had separate male and female class clown awards)

Lem the artificially intelligent said...

This plane!

Rush is a looser profe.

Lem the artificially intelligent said...

I want Althouse single...

Morons, do you think if Althouse gets hitched she will have time for us?

Hello?

TRundgren said...

""Escape (The Piña Colada Song)" — Rupert Holmes"

I'm always surprised as how quickly some are to dismiss little gems like Escape.

It's a mini masterpiece of focused songwriting. Not one word in that tune is a throw away.

Then again, Rupert Holmes is a master craftsman so it's no surprise.

The only song to hold the #1 position spanning two decades, 79 to 80.

TRundgren said...

""Escape (The Piña Colada Song)" — Rupert Holmes"

I'm always surprised as how quickly some are to dismiss little gems like Escape.

It's a mini masterpiece of focused songwriting. Not one word in that tune is a throw away.

Then again, Rupert Holmes is a master craftsman so it's no surprise.

The only song to hold the #1 position spanning two decades, 79 to 80.

Chip Ahoy said...

Ha ha ha. He's not holding a dog. That's a coat with a fur lining on a chair to his side which is blocking the view of his arm.

Ebony and Ivory
Just a Simple Love Song
ABC

Meade said...

Titus: What exactly is nooky wooky and how does it differ from it?

BTW, weren't you suppose to have a date with Althouse over the holidays? What happened with that, brother?

Don't tell me you stood her up again.

You didn't, did you?

That guy in the corner is obviously charming the pants off the girl across from him. Look... under the table...

no pants!

Michael Haz said...

Especially if the guy liked cupcakes and women who enjoyed reading their father's Playboys.

Michael Haz said...

And he owned a very exclusive boutique shoe store in Manhattan.

Lem the artificially intelligent said...

Look... under the table... no pants!

Lol..

Could you imagine Sully landing the plane on the Hudson and then having to look for his pants everywhere b4 he left the plane?

Kidding...

Meade said...

Lem said...
"I want Althouse single...
Morons, do you think if Althouse gets hitched she will have time for us?"

If she marries the right guy, she will.

But to meet her complex and mysterious needs, I'm afraid it will take a lot more than his having noise cancellation headphones, advanced degrees, and a pile of money .

Try following this thought arc:

marriage (to a guy like me) → sex on a regular basis → less insomnia → more energy → more time for us, her readers

Stop being so selfish and think about her needs for once.

Moose said...

Lem,

I don't think there's any danger of Althouse becoming non-single.

No proof, just a...

Feeling.

Meade said...

In other words, ask not what Althouse can do for you... ask what you can do fro Althouse.

Ted Sorenson stole that from me, by the way.

Alan said...

Your list sucks, Palladian. I like "What's Up" by 4 Non Blondes. I'll give you a few of those though, especially "I Wear My Sunglasses At Night" by Corey Hart. I drove from Jacksonville, FL to L.A. back in '84 with a few friends and heard that song for what seemed about a thousand times and still cringe by the mere mention of that song. (ugh)

Lem the artificially intelligent said...

Stop being so selfish and think about her needs for once.

Sorry I cant.

I want Althouse for myself, just like everybody here..

Dont put me down just because I'm saying what lot's of us are thinking.

Just Look at one of her polls..

She got hundreds maybe thousands hanging by her every word..

I'm not alone here!

traditionalguy said...

What are my first thoughts upon seeing a cute blonde, with earphones on, reading a Con Law treatise alone, in a public Cafe on Sunday afternoon? Is she waiting for someone? Is she lonely and her circle of acquaintances all doing other things? Is she too shi to have friends? I would go up and say hello to find out an answer. Best thing happens is you meet an interesting new friend. Worst thing happens is you fail to get any response.But what would our dear Professor do in this case?I suspect she would show off several of her special skills, and then leave you wondering while she "has to go".

Lem the artificially intelligent said...

I don't think there's any danger of Althouse becoming non-single.

You mean there arent any male maching her brain power?

That's the only fact giving me any hope ;)

Wince said...

I think most of the commenters here confuse hokey or pretentious lyrics with bad music. Not the same.

Sometimes a song is enjoyable "despite" hokey or pretentious lyrics, sometimes a song is enjoyable because of hokey or pretentious lyrics.

-----------

I can't imagine what is irresistible and/or unforgettable about We Built This City.

(Please do not tell me.)


The hell I won't!

Five words:

"Knee-deep in the hoopla."

TitusOnlyYou said...

The SAG awards are on.

Almost forgot!

TitusOnlyYou said...

Nooky Wooky is just a little over the sweater touchey and kissy poo.

Lem the artificially intelligent said...

Rush says he will stay on the air untill everybody agrees with him..

Well, as far far as I can tell we have not matched Rush's contract.

Lets Face it.. the day Althouse is not amused...

I dont want to think about that.

TitusOnlyYou said...

Marisa Tomei is on now and she doesn't have the same tits she had in The Wrestler.

TitusOnlyYou said...

The black guy from Hogan's Heroes died this year. So did the guy that was Rhoda's husband.

Lem the artificially intelligent said...

Nooky Wooky is just a little over the sweater touchey and kissy poo.

I'm not gay Titus... dont need you to patronise me.

Lem the artificially intelligent said...

Marisa Tomei is on now and she doesn't have the same tits she had in The Wrestler.

You see what I mean?

If Althouse goes where are we going to get that?

TitusOnlyYou said...

I didn't know Cyd Charisse died this year.

so did Sam Bottoms-dead.

The white neighbor from the Jeffersons-dead.

Lem the artificially intelligent said...

I'm good at this people..

Althouse will be leaving soon.

Palladian said...

"""Escape (The Piña Colada Song)" — Rupert Holmes"

I'm always surprised as how quickly some are to dismiss little gems like Escape.

It's a mini masterpiece of focused songwriting. Not one word in that tune is a throw away.

Then again, Rupert Holmes is a master craftsman so it's no surprise.

The only song to hold the #1 position spanning two decades, 79 to 80."

Yes! I think Rupert Holmes is a genius and that it's a perfectly crafted pop song! You people didn't read my preamble... a brilliant song can be one of the "worst songs ever"... "worst" in this case is not the same as a bad song. Actual bad songs are completely forgettable. These songs are the worst. That's a superlative.

TitusOnlyYou said...

SAG award for best supporting actor...Heath Ledger. Accepting the award is Gary Oldman, his co star.

Palladian said...

Joel, what's the deal with the "Piña Colada Song"?

Swifty Quick said...

The essence of bad 1980s music.

Lem the artificially intelligent said...

I mean, I'm a recent arrival at Althousia, I'm panicd.. because If I had any brains..

Oh My God.. what if it's like Alhouse's favorite movie - the conversation w/ andre but she's the only one in on the joke?

Althouse does teach Constitutional Law and Religion..

A sick joke and a celestial blessing at the same time.

Lem the artificially intelligent said...

My parents separated (divorced) when I was very young and I have not an adult relationship past a year..

I have prospects but the scary part is you can never be sure..

I'm going to have to trust somebody and soon.

I mean it.

TitusOnlyYou said...

Meryl Street just won the actress award. Sorry Kate. Meryl Streep only won one other SAG-for Angels in America.

TitusOnlyYou said...

Katie Holmes looks fabulous.

Sean Penn won. Sorry Mickey.

RR Ryan said...

I may have already said this, but Rupert Holmes rocks. Check out his albums before that one, such as Widescreen. Plus, when did Marisa Tomei get uplifted? I think she still lives across the street from me and I haven't noticed it.

JohnAnnArbor said...

"Fabulous" won't save her or her daughter from the Scientology loons.

Lem the artificially intelligent said...

I've been on and off with a long time girlfriend/friend..

We are in a sort of on again phase..

But now.. she has children.

I dont know, I dont think I have a problem.. as long as she does not have a problem..

She's a lawyer, she make smore than me. i dont have a problem w/ that either ;)

We know each other very well.

I called my mother and told her..

I just dint tell her who it was.

The Crack Emcee said...

"I think most of the commenters here confuse hokey or pretentious lyrics with bad music. Not the same."

I know. They completely ignored my link to The Shaggs and kept up this nonsense.

There's no trying to help some people.

TitusOnlyYou said...

Anthony Hopkins looks really old.



How old is the kid from Slumdog? He is kind of hot.

Lem the artificially intelligent said...

I'm so ready to be w/ someone.. that the only obstacle is who would want to?

I think by not beign w/ someone all this time I have missed something I will never be able to have..

At least, that's the way seems that way to me now.

RR Ryan said...

Anthony Hopkins is really old. A friend of mine was his agent back in the eighties. Bringing us right back to Rupert Holmes.

The Crack Emcee said...

Lem,

I've had one girlfriend since my divorce 3 years ago. I dropped her because she got too "lippy." Every other woman I've encountered is "spiritual" in the popular NewAge fashion. Needless to say, I stay away. And it's not so bad. I mean, I have my own interests, which is the key to be interesting to others, right?

I guess what I want to say is, "Hang in there, Man," the shit sneaks up on you when you least expect it.

In the meantime, I hear you.

Lem the artificially intelligent said...

Anthony Hopkins looks really old.

Titus will burn in hell and prob/ ask for more ;)

Ann Althouse said...

I put up a SAG Awards post.

Lem the artificially intelligent said...

I guess what I want to say is, "Hang in there, Man," the shit sneaks up on you when you least expect it.

In the meantime, I hear you.


Thank man. You too kind.

traditionalguy said...

Lem... A woman cannot fix you. You need to get into professional counseling and find some older man to help show you how to become and trust your own male personhood. Everybody goes thru this except the maybe 5% of men who were accepted by a loving Father.Then you will have what a woman wants and you will succeed at a good relationship with a safe woman who adds her strength to your strength. Right now you are in no condition to negotiate a good relationship for you, but will only end by blaming the woman for what she cannot provide you.

Lem the artificially intelligent said...

That's some kind of tune btw.

I wrote a tune kind of like that for an art competition in the Dominican Rep when I was a kid at school there..

sorry it's in spanish.

Las matas son verdes
El cielo es azul
Mi tia me quiere
Pero yo ya no..

Y por eso you quirao a mi nena..
a mi nena.

(my aunt had recently divorced, we blamed her, and somehow it found its way into the my art competition)

it was a riot when they told my mother.

Lem the artificially intelligent said...

I dont have a single family member that has not divorced.

not a brother or sister an aunt an uncle step parent on both sides.

Most of my causins of age have divorced.

I have one sister, younger than me that has divorced tree times.

Lem the artificially intelligent said...

It's kind of like a causin I have in Providence when upon her out of wed lock pregnancy her father, my uncle remarked, "well it's not like she ever left the family"..

I have to try to be w/ someone, unless I never leave.. I never live!

TitusInTheNameofLoveYeah said...

OK, I never give advice here because as you know it is always about me.

But Lem you need to get out and get involved with life. I looked at your profile and you have good tastes in music, movies and books. Join things, go places, meet people. Participate. Get busy. Do things. Become active. Now!

Lem the artificially intelligent said...

But Lem you need to get out and get involved with life. I looked at your profile and you have good tastes in music, movies and books. Join things, go places, meet people. Participate. Get busy. Do things. Become active. Now!

The conservative meetup in Hoboken was a disater.

It's not like I havent tried.

Hopefully this thing with my lawyer friend will pan this time.

reader_iam said...

Palladian: We have a stunning number of those songs on your list (amongst our tens & tens & tens & etc. of thousands in the collection). The reasons vary, but humor, contrast, nostalgia and let-this-be-a-warning-to-you rank high on the list. Among other rationalizations, justifications and sometimes just plain explanations.

LOL.

Meade said...

Lem, Here is my free advice to you: whatever you do, do not take Titus's advice.

reader_iam said...

Since I'm in confessional mode: Out of Palladian's list of 51 (did I miscount?--surely he did just 50, for symmetry, but damned if I'm going to go over it again), we are missing just 8 (... but it depends on how "squishy&firm" one wants to be at the same time). The net would be something like 44. I say "something like" because there are a few we don't have at all, a few we have more than one, and a few which we have, but not necessarily corresponding to Palladian's listed version, however brilliant and mostly on point.

Shake it up, throw it [strike]out[/strike] up, and one prays for it to come out in the wash, so to speak.

As always, this sort of thing cracks me up utterly. So human, so American, so meta ... whatever. I treasure it.

Anonymous said...

Freeman Hunt said...Althouse, on the other hand, is wearing earphones and reading a book about constitutional law. Now that would be a challenging pickup.

Could be a bad idea. Most unwelcome pickup I ever had anyone attempt on me was while I was running on a treadmill while reading a book.

"Heyyyy, what you reading there?"
/pant /pant "Huh?"


It's tough being a woman. So much easier being a man especially when trying to meet a woman.

I remember a time when some woman tried to pick me up and I............well I WOKE UP.

That's right only in our dreams do women hit on us. In the real world it's always up to us. MEN. It really is a man's world.

Be a man, take charge, toughen up. Don't be a wimp, don't be lame, don't be a candyass.

I agree with Palladian that "Candy man" is no good. But "Candy-O" live is pretty good.

The Crack Emcee said...Let's get this straight: those are not bad songs.

Here's a song that's so bad it's good - which means it's not even a "bad" song - but it'll at least give you some pointers to the difference.


The Shaggs need one of those old VH1 "Behind the Music" profiles.

Not much of an arc to the story unlike the typical BTM profile.

I really like their 1975 version of Tom T. Hall's song "I Love Little Baby Ducks" * but apparently it was too conventional for the Shagg connoisseurs.

* gratuitous pro squirrel reference in the lyrics.

TitusInTheNameofLoveYeah said...

Knock Three Times on The Window is a horrible song.

So is You Are My Obsession by Automation. Very 80's.

TitusInTheNameofLoveYeah said...

Hoboken doesn't have any republicans. Maybe you should move to Alabama?

J. Cricket said...

Lem,

No need to worry. Althouse won't get married again unless self-marriage is legalized.

blake said...

Maybe then JBD could get a divorce from his self=loathing...er, self.

The Crack Emcee said...

Lem,

Dude, the only problem I see is that you want it so badly. Like traditionalguy, I don't think a woman can help you. (And - Good God - what, or where, is a "safe woman" now'a'days?) Like I said, you're going to have to learn to amuse yourself (or - I hate this NewAge therapy language: "become and trust your own male personhood") for no other reason than you can. Women find me attractive but part of what they find attractive, I think, is that I've got my own thing and I'm my own man. I won't be swayed by the crowd and can't be led by the nose. If you want a relationship as bad as it seems you do, then you're a mark, Dude, and women don't want that anymore than you do. Long story short, in that old male tradition, you've got to learn to say "Fuck it" and, I don't know, go see a movie or something. But the kind that'll light a fire under your ass, bolster your spirit, and give you some perspective. Have you seen these two? You can probably find 'em at Blockbuster:

Welcome To the Dollhouse

Touching The Void (I think this one is available on Google Video - Yep)

vbspurs said...

Busy today, but just to say that guy's face, so full of love or lust, but either way full of interest for the gal, just melts my heart.

Cheers,
Victoria

OSweet said...

Have you done it with any of your commenters?

Who here knows her shoe size?

reader_iam said...

No, Candy-O is not OK.

Anonymous said...

reader_iam said...No, Candy-O is not OK.

You're a chick. You're jealous. I guy can't even sing about an imaginary girl without triggering off female competitiveness.

Maybe I'm biased due to the album cover.

I said it was merely OK. It aint "Walk Away", it aint "Unchanined". or this remake of a silly song.

MadisonMan said...

Palladian's list is nonsense. Those are great songs. Really terrible songs would be forgettable, their authors consigned to history, forgotten. I can hear every one of Palladian's songs in my head, so they must be very successfully written and produced songs.

kjbe said...

I would call the list, "Songs that I can't stand."

MadisonMan said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
MadisonMan said...

Exactly. They are only good or bad if one is the arbiter of all things good and bad.

And no one is that.

Meade said...

I'm with MadisonMan. Who is Palladian or Titus to tell me what music I should or shouldn't like? If I love Wing
(and let me recommend starting by scrolling down to 'Dancing Queen'), well then, it ain't nobody's business if I do.

Meade said...

Please note. The following [Wing] CDs are now sold out:

"MUSICAL MEMORIES OF
Les Miserables and The Phantom Of The Opera"
"I Could Have Danced All Night"
"The Sound of Music and The Prayer"

"Wing Sings The Beatles"

"Wing Sings ACDC"

traditionalguy said...

Crack Emcee...Sorry for using a New Age sounding phrase "... become and trust your own male personhood". but I couldnot think of a way to express the thought in traditional terms. You seem to be ahead of me in expression skills. I want to express that any man has to first feel his own worth and honor inside himself before he can bring a partner into that world to share it. His partner cannot supply that to him. It is only learned from another man. This also explains why the military experience helps in this regard for the young men who have come from homes missing a functioning father. You have best expressed this truth by simply citing the movie Touching the Void.

JohnAnnArbor said...

So is You Are My Obsession by Automation. Very 80's

"Obsession" by Animotion. And it's both very '80s and a classic of the time.