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"I keep thinking how could I have not known it was there?" Miss Hawkins said. "I will certainly be checking my bras every morning from now on."Also check your boots for scorpions, as any guy knows.
Oh. my. Totally gives me the willies.
Brits.Teen.Breasts.Something creepy.I smell a hoax.
I learned to live with the bat I discovered in my pants that alerted me to its presence by vibrating slightly. It's been a bit of a challenge at times to not let it take charge of things.
Did the bat emerge with dramatic theme music, and the large flame of a turbocharger? If so, it's probably one of those Victoria's Secret Bat Cave bats that Warners have as a promo tie-in for the film release...If you hear the Joker laugh from your box of drier sheets, remember the spring fresh scent...before the nerve toxin kicks in...
Madam, pardon me but....Is that a bat in your bra?Or, is it just the erotic frustrations of matrimonial imprisonment ?
Reminds me of the urban legends of yore, like spiders in the beehive hairdo and scorpions in the bananas.There was of course some moral lesson to be learnt, but mostly it was the eeeeewww factor, and coupling sex with death. Always a wining combination.The folks at Good Friends ought to think about that for their next cover image. A bat with a teen boob. Good Friends!
Pit-a-pat, pit-a-pat,Be still my heart within my fluttering chest.Alas, 'twas but a bat.Sad fills my heart within its empty nest.
Pit-a-pat, pit-a-pat,Be still my heart within my fluttering chest.Alas, 'twas but a bat.Sad my empty heart within its empty nest.
Well, crap, where's the picture? Odd week for news--maybe she should meet Lawn Chair Pilot.My creepy bug story: I came home one summer night and saw my screen door almost covered by beetles attracted by the porch light. I made a lot of noise and used my purse to brush off as many bugs as I could before I burst into the house, running as fast as I could. Whew, I thought, not seeing any bugs in the house. Then I ran my hand over my hair--about 5 beetles were stuck in my hair. I had to pull them off (with my hands in a towel).
Mrs. Horliss, did you notice that the author talks about having "your heir washed"?
Here's the well-known song of Ariel from The Tempest; it's a cheerful, sunny, fa-la-la sort of thing with a bat in it, a bit like our cheerful, fa-la-la young woman:Where the bee sucks, there suck I; In a cowslip's bell I lie; There I couch when owls do cry.On the bat's back I do fly After summer merrily. Merrily, merrily shall I live now Under the blossom that hangs on the bough. Here's the musical setting.Althouse never struck me as cheerful and fa-la-la when it comes to bats.AHHHHHHHH!OH!Not a bit.
Mrs. Horliss, did you notice that the author talks about having "your heir washed"?Well, a financial show I listen to on the radio always talks (tongue-in-cheek) about "your greedy, unwashed, undeserving heirs," so washing your heir may not be such a bad idea. ;-)
I've never had a rodent enter an article of my clothing before, but 1) I had a neighbor's hamster get into my apartment and run across my foot while I was shaving, and 2) I returned from a long vacation to find a mouse in my toilet (both stories here). Ever since the second thing happened, I've kept my toilet lids down whenever they weren't in use; at least the mouse wasn't able to escape the bowl and get out into my house.
There is a potential bad side to this. Bats are nocturnal and can carry rabies. It is not a good sign that the bat had not left the area by daylight.
Hesitated for a quite while (many hours), but now I'm going to do it: I'm thankful for other people's experiences with bats. Cautionary tales are fine things, indeed, in proper perspective, and it's not such a bad thing, for most people, to develop a palate for them.
Also, for anyone who's interested in the slightest in gaining insight into at least one slice of my sense of humor and outlook, consider this.
Oh, what the hell--while I'm at it, I might as well plug my nomination for Election Song 2008, as performed by--as it happens--the same group linked in my previous comment. Only, in this case, it's from an album which spoofs--and loves--a different set of music. Love that broadness of mind and generosity of spirit, and ecumenical aesthetic, if you will.Alternatively: Oh, whatever.
Excellent, Reader. Brave Combo got its start in Denton, Texas, where I went to college, and a couple of the members over the years have been former classmates of mine.
I'll second that, Kev! Great stuff, Reader. That is hilarious. I'm going to buy a couple of those ghostly takes on classical warhorses for my 14-year-old.Where else but on the Althouse blog could you get this entertainment value? I mean, from fa-la-la Shakespeare music to soundtracks for unmade Tim Burton movies, all on one topic.
Reminds me of this time I went spelunking, and suddenly felt something thrashing around in my hair. Turned out to be my cellphone. Go figure, right? I didn't expect service down there.
While some folks are trying to go Gothic with their humor, I'm thinking more British slapstick: This "bat in bra" story brings to mind Benny Hill. You know, the busty woman shakes her moneymakers, the bat falls out with a dazed smile on its face...
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