April 18, 2006

"I thought that would be good. Very nutritious."

Said Tom Cruise, about his baby's placenta. (Is the placenta the baby's or the mother's? And which way troubles you more?) It seems now that he was just joking, though some folks really do believe in eating the placenta.

I want to say that I wish the new baby well. It's a little girl, named Suri. Let's be nice!

But first, I want to say that in the interim before the only-joking word came out, Christopher Althouse Cohen emailed:
My question is: if you're going to eat the placenta after childbirth, why not eat the foreskin after circumcision?
There's more to that email, but out of respect for little Suri, I won't reprint it (though it was quite hilarious).

My response:
Why isn't placenta-eating cannibalism? The way biting your cuticles is cannibalism... Or should I say, biting someone else's cuticles?

43 comments:

Anna said...

The placenta recipes were hilarious.

Jennifer said...

Many people use a skin cream made from the foreskins of circumcised babies. Why not eat them indeed?

YUCK!

Ann Althouse said...

I'll just say Chris's email included the phrase "penis butter."

kyle said...

I think the placenta includes a bit of both mother and child. From answers.com

" It develops during pregnancy from the chorion of the embryo and the decidua basalis of the maternal uterus"

SippicanCottage said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
HaloJonesFan said...

Was the butter blocky and angular?

downtownlad said...

Some rabbis do taste the blood from the baby after a circumcision. I thought that was common knowledge.

http://www.nytimes.com/2005/08/26/nyregion/26circumcise.html?ex=1145505600&en=95763f3d900e4d3c&ei=5070

Steve H. said...

That kid is so screwed.

Jeff said...

The practice of circumcision makes placenta-eating seem civilized.

Dawn said...

Where's Child Protective Services when you need them?

I heard an interview with Cruise on the radio today; the interviewer asked him how his gf's parents were about her 'converting' to Scientology. "They're fine with it".
"Really?"
"Yeah, yeah, totally fine with it"
(words to that effect)

What stuck me is how he kept repeating how they 'were fine' with it. Over and over.

Sure sign that they're not.

What a creep.

Ruth Anne Adams said...

That Chris: a cock-eyed optimist.

Marghlar said...

Is there some rule that after reaching a certain level of success in Hollywood, you have to become a bizarre parody of yourself? Remember when Cruise was just an ordinary kind of action star, without all the freaky?

Scientology, you are on notice.

SippicanCottage said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Ruth Anne Adams said...

You heard about the mohel who worked for tips? Well, he assembled them all and made a lovely wallet.

When he rubs it, it becomes a suitcase.

reader_iam said...

Cruise as a 13-year-old daughter and an 11-year-old son--just the ages when kids can be most embarrassed of/by their parents.

Can you imagine seeing this everywhere?

But then, maybe they're not bothered by all this; maybe they're used to the oddity that Cruise seems to have become.

vesna said...

Oh, sorry I can't be nice. Being nice to a child can sometimes just be about feeding the ego of the parents. But I would prefer to leave poor Suri alone (what a horrible name!) and continue to make fun of Tom and Katie.

Finn Kristiansen said...

Jeff said...
The practice of circumcision makes placenta-eating seem civilized.


I like my circumcised penis. It is very non-threatening and user friendly. No overcoat (skin) on it, like it is about to duck out to shovel snow or brave the cold. Circumcision gives one's penis a homey, welcoming relationship to the outside world.

Christopher Althouse said...

I had placenta once. Tasted like chicken.

somefeller said...

The important question is this: what should one drink while dining on a placenta, red wine or white?

MadisonMan said...

I note that Suri uses letters in Cruise, except C and E. Surice would've been a better tie-in to the recent discussion on names.

It's unfortunate for this child that its birth is All About Tom and his very large ego. Contrast that to Brooke Shields' child, also born today. You hear very little about that.

Oh, and LOL at Sippican's first comment.

SippicanCottage said...
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Ron said...

Chris: Is that smooth or crunchy penis butter?

Would someone really name their Johnson "Skippy" of "Jif"? or even "Johnson"?

Maybe the reason Hannibal Lecter looks like he put on a few pounds is that he's a secret placenta eater, along with the liver, (whose?) fava beans, and of course...a nice chianti.

Steve Donohue said...

I've always preferred cornbread to placenta myself; placenta is just too gritty for my tastes. But, you know, different dtrokes for different folks.

Oh, wait...

Freeman Hunt said...

I actually thought Cruise's joke was pretty funny. He's a smart guy. He knows that everyone thinks he is weird and that the plans for his child's birth are especially weird. So, the placenta-eating thing was a pretty funny play off of that.

That said, I saw a film in college that showed a woman eating a placenta. She and another woman fried it up in a pan like a little pork chop. Yick.

jinnmabe said...

First, Chris needs to post more often. Penis butter. You're killin' me.

Second, Tony Kornheiser made the same tastes like chicken joke today. Great minds think alike.

Patrick Martin said...

Freeman, the fact that so many people failed to realize it was a joke (myself included, and I'm uaually pretty skeptical) should be an indication to him just how far around the bend he's gone.

Patrick Martin said...

By the by, Kyle was correct in saying that the placenta is part the motehr and part the child. Wikipedia has a detailed article.

Ruth Anne Adams said...

Any word on the delivery? Was it silent? And unmedicated? That stuff is important, too, you know.

Palladian said...

Nothing wards off the swarming body Thetans like a steaming plate of placenta.

Michael Farris said...

I once knew someone who'd eaten placenta. He was working in the Peace Corps (or something like it) in a village, somewhere in Latin America.
Either he or a friend had heard something about shamen eating placentas or they were just insane and when a local woman gave birth they asked for and were given the placenta which they cooked and ate.
He said it tasted like liver.

You are _very_ welcome.

bearbee said...

The important question is this: what should one drink while dining on a placenta, red wine or white?

The red with meat, white with fish rule applies... Mermaids have discretionary selection.

HaloJonesFan said...

Re: Names. One thing I've seen that's "popular" (in the sense that people who think they ought to be popular will do this) is to take sections of the mother's and father's first names. For example, "Tom" + "Katie" = "Kato", or "Toka", or maybe "Totie".

Verification word: "nifuz". The desert that Lawrence of Arabia used as a stanging ground for attacks on the Furry Nazis.

PatCA said...

I'm sure Gawker would give millions for a bit of the placenta right now so they could check the DNA to see the father really is!

I don't think they will get married. Anyone?

jeff said...

She apparently had an epidural.

And the Today show was going on about how ironic, based on their psychiatric drug back and forth last year, it was that both Shields and Holmes birthed on the same day.

Watching Tom Cruise makes me glad that I went into the Army after high school. They taught me to deal with my ADHD - as Scientology obviously has not taught Cruise.

SippicanCottage said...

Ah, Thetan placenta; the other, other, other white meat.

It's what's for dinner!

vbspurs said...

I had placenta once. Tasted like chicken.

What a coincidence!

I ate a foreskin once. It tasted like cock.

Cheers,
Victoria

vbspurs said...

Anyone else think Tom Cruise and Brooke Shields should exchange recipes?

Cheers,
Victoria

37383938393839383938383 said...
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37383938393839383938383 said...

Real babies don't wait for their mommies to push them out. Real babies gnaw their placenta and then claw their way out of the womb. Then they punch the nurse in the eye and spit pus in the doctor's face. All this talk of non-placenta eating babies makes me sick. Wussies.

Marghlar said...

CriticalO: I think your views on child-rearing have been overinfluenced by the Alien pentalogy.

Be patient. By the age of five, your children can properly be trained to kill and maim.

vbspurs said...

Be patient. By the age of five, your children can properly be trained to kill and maim.

Hey, Ann, is it time to start making fun of Tom and Katie's baby's name yet?

Here goes mine, if so:

Isn't suri cruise what he did in Risky Business, before that hooker taught him to drive?

Cheers,
Victoria

Craig Ranapia said...

Now Tom Cruise has been quite candid about his struggle with dyslexia, and how Scientology gave his "tech" to deal with it. How about they construct a bespoke course to address his social autism - seriously, am I the only person who finds the man more and more creepy every time he opens his mouth? (And, sorry, I don't give the proverbial flying f**k whether he was joking or not. Back on planet Earth, most of us don't blurt out "jokes" about chowing down on placenta - or eating foreskins, for that matter.)

Even spookier thought: Was he like this before he fired uber-publicist Pat Kingsley?

Jimmy said...

My wife's pregnant with our first child and after going for our second ultrasound scan, she turned to me and said what would you think if I ate the placenta? To be honest I was a bit shocked because I'd never heard of it before but after doing some research online including here, it seems like a lot of people seem to do it. I couldn't find any scientific evidence of health benefits it brings but my reply is; it's part of you so the choice is all yours.