March 2, 2006

"I can always make a pretty butt even prettier."

Says the buttock-augmenting plastic surgeon.
Last year 2,361 Americans had buttock augmentation surgery, almost four times as many as in 2002, the first year that the American Society for Aesthetic Plastic Surgery kept statistics on the procedure. The operation typically costs about $20,000....

Some women over 50 get the surgery to bulk up deflating derrières, while younger patients say they want larger buttocks to complement prominent busts. "I always got compliments for my front but never for my back," said Natalie Del Rio, 18, a high school student in Miami who had the procedure last month with Dr. Mendieta. "Now my mom says I look like a Coca-Cola bottle."
Presumably, the mother put up the money for all of this. What kind of a culture does this girl live in that she fretted that no one was talking about her ass?

Go to the link to read about the elaborate procedure that involves relocating two pounds of your own fat and that requires you to wear a "surgical girdle" and to avoid sitting down for weeks. All of this is supposed to make you more sexually attractive, but you have to be extremely pleasure-denying to go through with it. Well, what's the point of sex without irony?

And then there's the whole question of what the ideal ass is:
Two Mexican plastic surgeons, Dr. Ramón Cuenca-Guerra and Dr. Jorge Quezada, examined 132 patients and more than 1,000 photos and concluded that a beautiful bottom has four features: slight hollows on each side, a curved fold where the buttocks meet the thighs, a V-shape crease that looks like cleavage at the top and two dimples in the lower back. Dr. [Constantino] Mendieta also examined hundreds of photos but came to a different conclusion: that the overall shape of the buttocks is most important. He proposed that female buttocks come in four basic configurations: square, round, V-shape and A-shape.
Yes, it sounds ridiculous, the doctor who collects $20,000 for injecting a small bucket of fat into your ass had damned well better have done a lot of hard thinking about what shape he's after. And you'd better think it through carefully before going through the ordeal.

7 comments:

J. Cricket said...

Q: What kind of a culture does this girl live in that she fretted that no one was talking about her ass?

A: The kind where people like you blog on the way you did about women's figure skating, asses, and crotch shots.

john(classic) said...

Bustles will be back in style soon and women will be able to save money (unless, of course, they go for some of the fancier designer label bustles)

Jeremy said...

5-10 whole pounds, eh? How very generous of you, tim.

jeff said...

Actually j. cousteau has a point - physical attractiveness (or the perception of it) and body shape is commented on thoughout all segments of society now.

It's pretty sad that we're bringing up children to go to extremes to match what "society" says looks good... rather than what is healthy.

XWL said...

The enhanced 'cheeks' are far more common down Brazil way than here, better for shaking to Samba music I guess.

Just ask these folks:

"Some procedures, such as buttock surgery, were pioneered here in Brazil, while others have been refined to produce enhanced results and consequently, happier patients."

(and regarding weight, I think the Violent Femmes have it just about right)

Ann Althouse said...

Jeff: "Actually j. cousteau has a point - physical attractiveness (or the perception of it) and body shape is commented on thoughout all segments of society now."

Yeah, but this way more specific than that. Here's this 17 year old girl, and people are perhaps constantly saying to her "You look great" or maybe even "Your breasts are fantastic" (or whatever the kids say these days), but she's upset because no one is saying "You have a great ass," so she feels she must take surgical action. That's crazy! It's rude to say "You have a great ass" (except in an intimate relationship). The fact that you're not hearing that shouldn't mean much of anything.

And by the way, my comments on the skaters is that they should be drawing less attention to their crotches!

jeff said...

Then they need to stop judging and giving points for those manuevers that are showing us their crotches. I don't remember seeing nearly as many leg lift type manuevers in the years prior to the new judging standards.